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Joe and Kendra: Looking Forward to Side Hugs


choralcrusader8613

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On 3/29/2017 at 3:36 PM, Hmmm_idolatry said:

Kendra might get extra points due to her father's "ministry" of handing out fliers targeting the gays.  I can see JB getting very excited about that. 

Definitely extra credit worthy!

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4 hours ago, SorenaJ said:

73) Do you agree to babysit our gazillion children and our children's gazillion children whenever required?

74) Will you stare lovingly and devotedly at _______ every time he speaks? 

75) Are you willing to wear an abolish abortion shirt whenever prompted? 

76) Will you be joyfully available to _______ all the time he may ask, after you are married? 

 

 

77) Would you mind sharing undergarments with your sisters-in-law?

78) Name five things (each) that you would describe as "precious", "different", "neat", and "special".

79) Do you like fat and salt?  What is your favorite recipe that includes fat and salt?

80) If there is an emergency involving a family member, is your first priority to snap photos of the victim or provide/call for assistance?

2 hours ago, freshlemonade said:

77)  Solve for x:  2(3x - 7) + 4 (3 x + 2) = 6 (5 x + 9 ) + 3

(just to filter out the educated candidates...) 

These are folks in the Duggar circle, so it would probably be more like:  x + 1 = 3.

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On 2017-03-28 at 5:58 PM, Hmmm_idolatry said:

I wonder if they'll make them pretend to get engaged on film like they did with Jinger.  Another romantic dinner date in the woods like Joy (note that this is the opposite of Jinger's engagement in the big city), or maybe they'll go somewhere in the middle since they bounced from one extreme to the other with Jinger and Joy, and have them get engaged at Tacos For Life?  

How about Arby's? Nah, it's been done before.

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4 hours ago, freshlemonade said:

77)  Solve for x:  2(3x - 7) + 4 (3 x + 2) = 6 (5 x + 9 ) + 3

(just to filter out the educated candidates...) 

If she's truly meant to be a Duggar in-law, she'll answer:  Jesus!  or she'll look to Joe to solve it for her since she's not allowed to think. 

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7 hours ago, Mela99 said:

So who else thinks he'll propose on Tabitha's wedding day to distract people?

on the stage right before the wedding with a camera crew in toe 

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These questions are all making me die of laughter. Let's remember, though, that this questionnaire would also be delivered with a stack of Duggar Vocabulary index cards for study, and the examinee would need to become familiar with spouting "season of life" "awesome" in place of any descriptive adjective "whenever" "servant's heart" "pray(ing) about x" and other such nauseating Duggarisms.

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Free Jinger presents: 77 Rules and counting for courting my fundie son. :D

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81.) Do you promise adoringly gaze at _________, whenever they speak although they may be saying the dumbest thing in the world?

82.) Do you promise to never leave __________ no matter what they do because you forgave them?

83.) Circle one: Therapy by ebil professionals or Jesus rehab.

84.) Will you let your husband name the children?

85.) Will you sing Amazing Grace no matter  when or where ?

86.) Are you ok with your husband suddenly quitting his job?

87.) Describe what keeping sweet means to you?

88.) Have you ever been to journey to the heart ? If so why?

89.) What age have you received Jesus Christ as your personal savior? Please describe this experience.

90.) List some vague qualities about __________ approved by our brand of Christianity. 

91.) Please describe every heat tool you own for your hair including brand name and barrel size for the curling irons.

92. True or false: Trashing my wedding vehicle is ok.

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Y'all are on a roll; a few of my faves. 

36 minutes ago, ariel9 said:

91.) Please describe every heat tool you own for your hair including brand name and barrel size for the curling irons.

 

16 hours ago, Dandruff said:

80) If there is an emergency involving a family member, is your first priority to snap photos of the victim or provide/call for assistance?

 

14 hours ago, Lyle Lanley said:

How about Arby's? Nah, it's been done before.

I've always wondered who eats at Arbys.  Now I know. 

It's telling that males aren't required to show absolute proof of their ability to support a bazillion precious children,  keep the wife in hair spray and tater tots and a roof over all their heads, while showing proof of (possibly marginal) home-school education. 

Is having been through Alert! a requirement for males?

Edited by Howl
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1 hour ago, Howl said:

Y'all are on a roll; a few of my faves. 

 

 

I've always wondered who eats at Arbys.  Now I know. 

It's telling that males aren't required to show absolute proof of their ability to support a bazillion precious children,  keep the wife in hair spray and tater tots and a roof over all their heads, while showing proof of (possibly marginal) home-school education. 

Is having been through Alert! a requirement for males?

I like Arby's. There's this sauce called Bronco Berry that is great with their chicken tenders. 

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Before I developed my wheat allergy, I CHOWED on Arby's. I fracking loved it. The buns, the roast "beef", the curly fries, a Dr. Pepper. Those were the days.

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There is an Arby's right next to my counselors office. Now that they do happy hour between 2 and 5 I get a small mint chocolate shake and a small curly fry every time I have an appointment. Can't help it, they're yummy!

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18 minutes ago, Shadoewolf said:

There is an Arby's right next to my counselors office. Now that they do happy hour between 2 and 5 I get a small mint chocolate shake and a small curly fry every time I have an appointment. Can't help it, they're yummy!

Yes but do you have a six inch ruler to make sure you do not touch your intended before holy matrimony?

Edit: You may have to read the Kristina's Keepsakes Blog to get the reference...

Edited by Lyle Lanley
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37 minutes ago, KeepingChrysanthemum said:

Just spotted this April Fool's article involving J&K (JK ... Perhaps this is their holiday) and had to share! 

https://www.thehollywoodgossip.com/2017/04/kendra-caldwell-pregnant-by-joseph-duggar-before-marriage/

 

No one on FJ would fall for that since we all know JB would force those two down the aisle the minute the pee stick turned positive. 

Edited by JermajestyDuggar
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On 3/30/2017 at 10:35 PM, DuggarsandDragons said:

These questions are all making me die of laughter. Let's remember, though, that this questionnaire would also be delivered with a stack of Duggar Vocabulary index cards for study, and the examinee would need to become familiar with spouting "season of life" "awesome" in place of any descriptive adjective "whenever" "servant's heart" "pray(ing) about x" and other such nauseating Duggarisms.

The "whenever" one is at the top of my all time hated list of Duggarisms. I find it so so cringeworthy. Which is saying a lot, because they say an awful lot of really really cringey things. 

Edited by emscm
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On 3/30/2017 at 7:35 PM, DuggarsandDragons said:

These questions are all making me die of laughter. Let's remember, though, that this questionnaire would also be delivered with a stack of Duggar Vocabulary index cards for study, and the examinee would need to become familiar with spouting "season of life" "awesome" in place of any descriptive adjective "whenever" "servant's heart" "pray(ing) about x" and other such nauseating Duggarisms.

What about the screen test? (Only half joking) I imagine that the new spouses get put through a lot of training before they are put on TV.

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On 3/31/2017 at 9:58 AM, Howl said:

Is having been through Alert! a requirement for males?

I don't think so.  Not all of our favorite fundie males seem to have attended Alert, but I'm pretty sure they're all expected to marry.  My sense is that the guys attend Alert if they want to (and the family can afford it) or their father believes they need to.  If the guy isn't interested, and the father doesn't see a need for supplemental brainwashing and discipline, then they skip it.

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2 hours ago, Dandruff said:

I don't think so.  Not all of our favorite fundie males seem to have attended Alert, but I'm pretty sure they're all expected to marry.  My sense is that the guys attend Alert if they want to (and the family can afford it) or their father believes they need to.  If the guy isn't interested, and the father doesn't see a need for supplemental brainwashing and discipline, then they skip it.

I wonder if our fave TFDW did ALERT? 

I would have tuned in for that. 

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93. Do you know all the words to "Through the Blood" and "I've Been Redeemed"? Please write out the chorus of these songs here.

94. Did you look up the lyrics on the internet to answer #93? (any candidate who answers "yes" is automatically disqualified for having non-Jana protected access to internet).

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2 hours ago, Nikedagain? said:

I wonder if our fave TFDW did ALERT? 

I would have tuned in for that. 

I would've paid money to see that on the big screen. :pb_lol: 

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@jerkit, @Shadoewolf,   There are not very many Arbys around my state; there are tons of Sonics, some Taco Bells, Wendys, McDonalds and in every small town with at least 2,000 people, without fail, a Dairy Queen.   Wendys and Dairy Queen now have this junior size; it's a very small Frosty (Wendys) or Blizzard (DQ). If Arbys has some version of this (very small mint chocolate shake!) I'm in.  The curly fries sound good too.  I too have had to give up wheat, so I do a salad and Mr. JB gets the burger.  On the rare occasion we find a Wendys while on the road, the chili baked potato can't be beat. 

That said, we finally got an In n Out Burger here in Austin.  After all the hype and secret menu stuff, I thought it would be something magical, maybe even transcendent.  It's just.....a burger. 

OK, back to regular Duggaring.  

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6 hours ago, Howl said:

@jerkit, @Shadoewolf,   There are not very many Arbys around my state; there are tons of Sonics, some Taco Bells, Wendys, McDonalds and in every small town with at least 2,000 people, without fail, a Dairy Queen.   Wendys and Dairy Queen now have this junior size; it's a very small Frosty (Wendys) or Blizzard (DQ). If Arbys has some version of this (very small mint chocolate shake!) I'm in.  The curly fries sound good too.  I too have had to give up wheat, so I do a salad and Mr. JB gets the burger.  On the rare occasion we find a Wendys while on the road, the chili baked potato can't be beat. 

That said, we finally got an In n Out Burger here in Austin.  After all the hype and secret menu stuff, I thought it would be something magical, maybe even transcendent.  It's just.....a burger. 

OK, back to regular Duggaring.  

even before i finished reading the comment, or saw your "user" info, i sensed another central-ish texan! haha and yesssss in'n'out is so not worth it. i'm not a burger person, but i've heard they're pretty average, and their shakes & fries are good but not great. definitely on the equivalent of whataburger as "good" fast-food lol, or the chik-fil-a level of chicken sandwiches. 

I have been to arby's once, and was pleasantly surprised by its un-shitty-ness :P . my honest-to-god go-to for horrendous fast food is still a mickey d's happy meal :D 

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I didn't like in'n'out either... but as a Texan, I feel like we have a lot of Arby's... there's one not far from my house, and they're building another a few blocks from that (which to me is weird, I wonder if they're moving the first one). It's not my favorite fast food place, but it's OK.

Edited by choralcrusader8613
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On 3/30/2017 at 1:33 PM, freshlemonade said:

77)  Solve for x:  2(3x - 7) + 4 (3 x + 2) = 6 (5 x + 9 ) + 3

(just to filter out the educated candidates...) 

Dang you, now you've made me go and solve that equation for x.  :pb_lol:  x = -21/4.  Trust me on that.

No, there is no way I would be approved to marry a Duggar boy. Nor would I want to.

Edited by pamplemousse
cuz I am not angry at freshlemonade, for reals, and cuz I gave the wrong answer in my original response
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