Tori Bates' courtship- Part 3 Now Engaged - September 2017

[Mela99]

Is it a Bates thing that both sets of parents are always present for the proposal?

[VelociRapture]

38 minutes ago, Mela99 said:

Is it a Bates thing that both sets of parents are always present for the proposal?

As are as I know - I'm pretty sure Chad's parents weren't there when he proposed to Erin, but that's likely because they live in Oklahoma and Chad proposed in Tennessee.

I think Kelly and some of the daughters (I want to say Alyssa was one because she was getting to know John at that point) were present when Zach proposed to Whitney - he arranged a surprise trip to Florida and asked her on a beach.

John proposed to Alyssa on a beach at one of the resorts at Disney when she and Tori were in Florida for a late Christmas visit with the Websters. Kelly's post said family was present, but not exactly who - so I'm guessing it was Tori and members of John's family.

I guess it makes sense to have the parents there though? Because if you have to have chaperones for a major life event (), why not have it be the people who raised you?

In which case, why wasn't Michael there. Because I'm pretty damn sure she'd have done more parenting of Tori than Kelly or Gil.

[stardust]

Not sure if this has been mentioned yet but the promo for the Secret Special episode this Thursday looks to be made up entirely of flashbacks from Tobby's courtship going off of the commercial posted to the BUB FB page. It makes sense that they'd wait until next season to show the actual proposal, but I truly wonder what is the point of making an episode made up of old clips that we've already seen? Anyway, just wanted to do my civic duty and warn you guys in case any of you were planning on wasting time watching live. 

[QuiverDance]

That ring is uuuuggggly. 

[ariel9]

I like the ring. I don't like that they did not listen to Tori wanting to marry after graduation. Finishing college is an accomplishment. Unfortunately framed in their beliefs, they need a quick transition from engagement to marriage so they don't do any unsanctioned activity and burn in Hell.

[HereticHick]

I got engaged on a street corner with no chaperones, no theme, no stunts, and no photos. In the eyes of the fundies and/or Pinterest crowd, it didn't really happen!

[Palimpsest]

When I pointed out to Mr. P that we had decided to get married with no ornate proposal he went down on one knee in the middle of Gatwick Airport.  I practically broke the whole thing off from acute embarrassment.  

No chaperones and no parental units were involved until 6 months later when we broke the news after formally introducing our future spouse to them.  That was three months before we tied the knot and they were not terribly keen on the relationship.  Because Catholic and Protestant.

I also never had an engagement ring.  We couldn't afford it.  I did get a nice pearl ring for our 5th wedding anniversary though.  I don't like diamonds.

[stardust]

16 hours ago, QuiverDance said:

That ring is uuuuggggly. 

It's 1 AM where I live and I have class at 8:30 in the morning, yet instead of sleeping here I am laughing uncontrollably about how well your post fits with your avatar 

[NakedKnees]

I think her ring looks just fine. Personally, diamond (or diamondish) rings with whatever metal just don't appeal to me at all. Unless it's ultra-creative or ultra-modern, it just looks like very expensive frump to me. I'd say most fundie rings fall into that category. Heirlooms are an exception.

I'm excited to see how they design a winter wedding. I've always thought that's gotta be modesty-friendly and potentially gorgeous.

[nausicaa]

2 hours ago, NakedKnees said:

I'm excited to see how they design a winter wedding. I've always thought that's gotta be modesty-friendly and potentially gorgeous.

I used to think that too, but then saw several Fundie weddings in the winter that were just summer weddings transposed onto a barren landscape. Creativity and thinking outside of the box isn't too encouraged in these circles. 

But the Bates girls have come a long way in terms of fashion and taste, so maybe Tori will surprise me. 

[VelociRapture]

41 minutes ago, nausicaa said:

I used to think that too, but then saw several Fundie weddings in the winter that were just summer weddings transposed onto a barren landscape. Creativity and thinking outside of the box isn't too encouraged in these circles. 

But the Bates girls have come a long way in terms of fashion and taste, so maybe Tori will surprise me. 

Dear God, if there is a God... please let Whitney and Alyssa take Tori dress shopping. She's not getting her spring wedding and she'll be married before graduating. At the very least she deserves a dress that isn't a modest nightmare.

[JermajestyDuggar]

Where my husband and I got engaged was absolutely stunning. However there wasn't a single picture, let alone person to even take one nearby. We were utterly alone. How we like it. So it only lives on in memory. Which is fine by me.

[Snarkle]

Well Whitney had a December wedding and it wasn't *that* awful.  [As long as Erin doesn't help with the dress.]  I thought at one point Whitney said one advantage of a December wedding would be that the church would be decorated already, and she embraced the holiday theme with black and red dresses for her attendants [see Spoiler below].  

Spoiler

 

Frankly I'm not in love with the brown dress Tori has on in her engagement pictures.  If she didn't know that it was going to happen that day, it's somewhat understandable, but on Bringing Up Bates she usually has a shorter skirt and t-shirt layers of some sort that is somewhat stylish for someone with modesty restrictions.  That empire waist and the one picture of Bobby behind her with his arms around her midsection is like foreshadowing of her future as a mother.  We'll see if she finishes school.

 

[Kangaroo]

I'm going to go all in and say a December 20th Wedding.

A fundie Christmas, Birthday and Wedding themed extravaganza.

 

[BeccaGrim]

Tori is the one they always say doesn't like to dress up. She gets annoyed on I Love You day when they made it formal.  She may keep this very simple. Carlin, by contrast, over the top.  Its all about me day. 

[HereticHick]

2 hours ago, BeccaGrim said:

Tori is the one they always say doesn't like to dress up. She gets annoyed on I Love You day when they made it formal.  She may keep this very simple. Carlin, by contrast, over the top.  Its all about me day. 

Carlin will be a Bridezilla

[VelociRapture]

4 minutes ago, HereticHick said:

Carlin will be a Bridezilla

Not gonna lie, I may suffer through my husband's eye rolls and judgment to watch Carlin planning a wedding. I have a feeling it would be absolutely hysterical (because I wouldn't be involved. At all.)

[TatertotAsserole]

17 hours ago, Kangaroo said:

I'm going to go all in and say a December 20th Wedding.

A fundie Christmas, Birthday and Wedding themed extravaganza.

This is everything I will try to avoid if I get married. I would need a wedding date a comfortable six weeks from Christmas and my birthday (which is in August).  I am NOT risking combo gifts. 

[FeministFunPolice]

Ten bucks says that she does a Christmas themed wedding with red and green everywhere. 

[singsingsing]

13 hours ago, TatertotAsserole said:

This is everything I will try to avoid if I get married. I would need a wedding date a comfortable six weeks from Christmas and my birthday (which is in August).  I am NOT risking combo gifts. 

What's wrong with combo gifts? Would people get you Christmas themed things for your wedding? Or wedding themed things for your birthday? 

[Ali]

I got married mid fall and received some first Christmas ornaments as wedding gifts. I thought they were sweet and I love putting them on the tree every year.

I was very tempted to have a wedding closer to Christmas, but I am kind of glad I resisted because the Christmas season can be chaotic.

[TatertotAsserole]

1 hour ago, singsingsing said:

What's wrong with combo gifts? Would people get you Christmas themed things for your wedding? Or wedding themed things for your birthday? 

I meant getting a present that is supposed to apply to both occasions rather than multiple presents throughout the year. My brother, for instance, has a bday between Thanksgiving and Christmas. He almost never gets separate birthday and Christmas presents. I figure with a birthday in August and Christmas in December, I'll aim to get married in April to ensure at least one present every four months. 

[Seculardaisy]

Taryn posted engagement photos. I like that this one features a sticker shoutout to a play/movie that is definitely unapproved by fundies "Rocky Horror Picture Show."

Spoiler

 

[nausicaa]

Not a professional photographer, but why on earth do two young twentysomethings with clear skin and no wrinkles need such a hazy filter? It seems pointless. 

Aside--does anyone think these filters are going to date photos as so "2010s" in twenty years? The way yellow and orange tinted photos scream "1970s"? 

[Seculardaisy]

17 minutes ago, nausicaa said:

Not a professional photographer, but why on earth do two young twentysomethings with clear skin and no wrinkles need such a hazy filter? It seems pointless. 

Aside--does anyone think these filters are going to date photos as so "2010s" in twenty years? The way yellow and orange tinted photos scream "1970s"? 

Well Taryn take the hazy/blurred photos to a new level. Many good professional photographers will blur what's not the focal point of the photo whereas Taryn just goes bananas and blurs the whole thing. I do not get her photography style.