BOOK REVIEW: "The Power of a Transformed Wife"

[freealljs]

Reading Mary Ann's reviews, she doesn't come across as libelous. She is disagreeing with Lori. I don't see how this would hold in a court case. Lori should develop a thicker skin.

[alba]

Can we please make "official internet troll" a post count title?

As for the rest of the post, wow. Just wow. This person is literally trying to ruin a woman's life for the crime of stating her opinions on the internet. Smh.

[Colby]

Wise Words of Ken on facebook.....

"Life is filled with poop everywhere, but if you focus on all the good things you rarely see it as you carefully step through life. If people would only learn that we get in life what we focus upon. Focus on the good and good comes, focus on the bad and ugly and you create the self-fulfilling prophecy."

Stay classy Ken. 

[Loveday]

9 minutes ago, freealljs said:

Reading Mary Ann's reviews, she doesn't come across as libelous. She is disagreeing with Lori. I don't see how this would hold in a court case. Lori should develop a thicker skin.

I can't imagine any lawyer taking this on. It would be laughed out of court. 'Mary Ann's' review was reasonable and well written, backed up with quotes and examples from the book as well as her own opinions, precisely like any other good book review would be written. I really think this is a way for Lori and her minions to scare people into not saying anything bad about her book, and it also unfortunately seems to be serving as a way for her to get some of the negative comments removed from Amazon by the writers themselves, since she can't do it.

 

Edited to add that I think 'Mary Ann' might want to get a lawyer herself--Lori and Ken could still make her life miserable even if they can't find a lawyer to take her to court. I wouldn't put it past them to be as ugly as possible to her or to anyone else who dares to say something other than the approved party line about Lori's book.  

[polecat]

The hags at Lori's blog are doxxing Mary Ann and rounding up a lynch mob:

Quote

Interesting Lori, it’s amazing to me (much in the way it is for your editor probably) how awful these trolls are in slandering you. I’ve read about cases where it was possible for lawyers to find out who these people are, and go after them with a lawsuit. I’ve even heard of public figures being able to get the troll fired from their job for their “extracurricular activities,” and expose them to their community.

 

Because Mary Ann had the audacity to offer Lori sympathy for what was done to her.

That's apparently slander in Lori's upside down world.

[Koala]

I hope Lori remembers to comb through her blog very carefully before she tries to sue someone for "slander".  It'd look awfully silly to have to explain to the judge that your comment section is really akin to a private diary, and naturally, you can't take anything that's said there seriously.  

Lori contradicts herself right and left, but direct quotes give her away every.single.time.  

Let's also not forget that Lori and Ken also threatened to sue Google.  Naturally, nothing came of it.  

The fact is, I don't think Ken really wants that kind of spotlight on Lori's blog, and more specifically, his comments on Lori's blog.  She can go on a deleting spree, but people have screenshots.  

Hey- I have an idea! Remember when Lori posted pictures of her son's friends and talked about how immodest they were?  Maybe they should sue her for "slander" and posting their picture without permission.  Or, what about the woman who runs the thong making business?  Or maybe the author of Jesus Calling, or The Five Languages of Love.  

I could go on, but I think you get the idea.

[polecat]

15 minutes ago, Colby said:

Wise Words of Ken on facebook.....

"Life is filled with poop everywhere, but if you focus on all the good things you rarely see it as you carefully step through life. If people would only learn that we get in life what we focus upon. Focus on the good and good comes, focus on the bad and ugly and you create the self-fulfilling prophecy."

Stay classy Ken. 

 

Maybe his wife should take these words to heart and start focusing on all those good reviews instead of becoming a bad and ugly self-fulfilling prophecy of poop.

[Koala]

Just now, polecat said:

Maybe his wife should take these words to heart and start focusing on all those good reviews instead of becoming a bad and ugly self-fulfilling prophecy of poop.

Focusing on the bad reviews?  What are you talking about?  She just "peeked" at the one review!  You may have thought you saw her arguing with other reviewers, but she's deleted that all now, so it didn't really happen.  Because Jesus.

[usmcmom]

@Kenyou need to get your wife under control.  This reviewer is not guilty of libel. She merely posted a review based on her understanding of Lori's book.  If the portion which caused her concern was easily misconstrued by a reader, that points to poor writing.  Lori is looking very foolish and like a spoiled bully. Clearly, she is still used to getting her way and having people cave to her every whim. That is not a meek and gentle spirit. 

She claims that the only "true" reviews give her five stars. Do you recognize how absolutely arrogant that is??? She has her minions hunting down those who challenge her in the review section on Amazon.  She turns to her blog to attack these people when all they are doing is leaving a review of her book.  If this is how you handle people who disagree with you, then YOU are the dangerous ones. 

Remember when you were here at FJ throwing your little tantrum that people were looking up your business and trying to get you in trouble?  None of that actually happened, by the way; but here you and Lori are encouraging your readers to do exactly what you said was wrong. 

Did you really think you and Lori could publish a book and have absolutely NO negative reviews? Are you that arrogant and superior??  Some of the best (and genuine) Christian authors I read have negative reviews on Amazon and they ignore them.  Your delight in arguing is such a bad representation of Christ, I'm sure your family is embarrassed for you. 

You and Lori are bullies.  You have finally reached a venue in which people can answer back to you (and you cannot delete those comments) and you cry persecution.  You can not take what you have been dishing out for years. 

Finally, if Lori's intention in writing this book was merely to help women, she would not mind the negative reviews. She would have faith that the book would reach its intended audience and be content in her work.  The fact that you are fighting over every criticism only points to the fact that you are keeping an eye on sales. Perhaps you are in this for the money and not God's work. 

[Koala]

2 minutes ago, usmcmom said:

@Kenyou need to get your wife under control.  This reviewer is not guilty of libel. She merely posted a review based on her understanding of Lori's book.  If the portion which caused her concern was easily misconstrued by a reader, that points to poor writing.  Lori is looking very foolish and like a spoiled bully. Clearly, she is still used to getting her way and having people cave to her every whim. That is not a meek and gentle spirit. 

She claims that the only "true" reviews give her five stars. Do you recognize how absolutely arrogant that is??? She has her minions hunting down those who challenge her in the review section on Amazon.  She turns to her blog to attack these people when all they are doing is leaving a review of her book.  If this is how you handle people who disagree with you, then YOU are the dangerous ones. 

 

I wish I could like your post a million times.  Mary Ann has deleted all of her comments.  We are literally watching Lori bully her way into positive reviews.  I wouldn't believe it, if I wasn't seeing it myself.  

She once wrote a post about how controlling she was, and in it, she admitted to threatening a neighbor because she felt their dog was barking too much:

Quote

When the dog below us yapped constantly, guess who called them all the time, left notes on their door, and wrote a letter telling them they better shut that dog up Or Else and got all the neighbors to sign it...Me!

Lori likes to control people, and when that doesn't work, she threatens them. 

http://lorialexander.blogspot.com/2011/06/it-aint-easy-being-submissive-wife.html

[mango_fandango]

This woman is bats. Period.

[molecule]

I am flabbergasted at those comments on her blog and by Lori's decision to respond to them publicly. Comments that disagree with Lori are deleted and never seen by most of us, but comments that invite revenge, she approves and responds to positively. That shows her in far worse a light than a comment with a thoughtful question or disagreement.

If Lori had expected a more positive response, I am not surprised that this criticism would throw her. Because she has a habit of deleting comments that disagree with her, all she has learned is how to ignore rather than respond. And now she has absolutely no idea how to handle this.

Lori might genuinely feel persecuted--but this is what she should do right now: prayerfully consider each accusation and criticism, with a mind that is open to discerning what is valid and a heart that is willing to accept that she is an imperfect human being. Some of the criticism points to things she easily could change without diminishing her message in any way--such as the concerns about using people's real names. It doesn't change her message at all to respect the privacy of others.

I came under some pretty intense criticism a while back in my own ministry work, and it was a difficult experience--so I do have sympathy for Lori in that regard. No matter how much of this is her own doing, being attacked for something you really believe is an awful experience.

Being prayerfully open in considering the criticism is a hard thing to do--but it is very important for anyone in Christian ministry. Her spiritually immature response to this tells me more about her integrity (specifically, her lack of it) than her body of work up to this point.

[usmcmom]

CHAPTER NINE: Teaching and Training Children in the Way They Should Go

*disclaimer:  this is probably a bad time for me to review any part of this book. Ken and Lori have my blood boiling this morning.  I actually had a few positive things to say about some portions of this chapter (and those following) but now?  I can barely see my own notes, I'm so angry at their disgusting behavior.  I hope Ken has noted that I have tried to give Lori credit for some positive aspects of her book up to this point.  I, unlike the Alexanders, am able to be objective and charitable even to those with whom I mostly disagree. Okay...deep breath...and here we go.

*******

Lori reminds us that she has four children and "none of them rebelled from the Lord..." Lori and Ken were considered strict parents.  My husband and I were considered strict parents as well. We just managed to discipline our children and raise them into decent adults without EVER taking a leather strap to their tiny little thighs, but I digress. 

Lori reminds us that they spanked their children, citing the verses in Proverbs as their reason for doing so. Interestingly, in her writings on the blog, she has often said that Old Testament scriptures are no longer prescriptive for our Christian walk because the New Testament is the new covenant and we are to live our lives based on New Testament teachings.  But whatta I know....? She also reminds us that pain is a great teacher.  So are patience, compassion and mercy, but again I'm not a published author who threatens others, so I'll just stay quiet about that.

Ken and Lori expected their kids to "obey them the first time."  I agree with that. We expected prompt obedience from our children as well, and our children learned to obey us quickly without being struck with a strap or any other object.  Lori and Ken took the lazy way in disciplining their children.  It's much faster to lash out in anger and smack a child then to take a deep breath and approach them with mercy and patience.  Each will yield the same result, but one will result in an obedient child who trusts and admires their parents. The other will result in obedience out of fear. 

Lori reminds us again that they did not allow sleepovers. Every time she mentions this, I am struck with the thought that many families probably explicitly refused to allow their children to be at the Alexander house as well.  I'm sure most mothers could pick up on the predator-vibe given off by Ken, and the gleeful desire in Lori to hit children.  So, while Ken and Lori were labeling all the other families "unfit," those families were probably labeling them as "dangerous." 

Lori tells us that they trained their children to sleep through the night when they were several MONTHS old.  Doesn't she tell us in her blog that it was just a few weeks?  Our super searchers need to get on that, please. 

She decided to homeschool Ryan when he was in sixth grade. She was sure he would have been labeled ADD had he been tested so they just took him out of school. At home, he read a lot, did some math and ate and played.  He also got to go surfing a lot with his cousin.  Funny how Lori demands self control and obedience from children but when it's her child, she certainly can't expect him to sit in a chair for a whole school day and behave appropriately.  Also, if she suspected ADD, why not have the child tested so she could be aware of the best ways for him to learn.  She did the same with Steven - homeschooling him from fifth through eight grades. Again, he did not like school or sitting for long periods of time. 

She mentions that Cassi wanted to go to the local middle school and Lori allowed it for a time, until she began falling under bad influence from other girls. Remember the post Lori wrote on her blog about this? The post in which she actually published a picture of the girl who led Cassi astray?  I think that girl's parents should probably look into suing Ken and Lori for "slandering" their daughter. 

She ends this chapter by sharing the letter Steven wrote to his parents on his wedding day.  It always bothered me that she shared that because she clearly did it to build herself up.  I have some absolutely beautiful letters from my son from his days at boot camp.  There is no way I would share them with the world like that. Those letters were meant to be between a young man and his parents. Regardless of the beautiful words he shared with us, I feel no need to prove to the world that my son loves me. Sharing his thoughts on love of country and family would just be wrong.  If our children wanted their words to be public, they would have their own blogs.  Or course Steven gave Lori permission to share the letter; after all, Lori has made it clear that nobody tells her no. 

The next chapter - ten - Birth Control and Having Children - is next.  It is brief but I need to catch my breath and take a shower.  Thanks for your patience. 

 

[usmcmom]

I was going to leave a comment on Amazon, letting them know that Lori is threatening legal action and looking up personal information on people who give her a negative review. Since I would be a "verified purchase" reviewer, it instantly directed me to my recent Amazon purchases, one of which would most likely disclose who I am. Can everybody see that?  I'm trying to decide if I'm up for a fight with Ken and Lori.  I mean, I have no doubt they'd be coming after the wrong person and they would be nothing more than an annoying gnat for me. But is it worth it???  Hmmmm, decisions, decisions. 

I think it is very important for Amazon to know that one of their authors is behaving in such a threatening and vindictive manner so I might just go for it.  Maybe I'll just wait until I leave my own review and sit back and wait for the legal summons to arrive. 

Seriously, Ken and Lori; if you want a fight, choose carefully. 

[quiversR4hunting]

I wonder if any of her fan girls are calling Lori out about outing MaryAnn. We won't know because she won't publish those comments but I really wonder.

I feel really bad for Mary Ann. Mary Ann if you read here- lock down your amazon and I would report the harassment to Amazon. Doubt they can do anything but I don't know.

[Koala]

31 minutes ago, usmcmom said:

Lori tells us that they trained their children to sleep through the night when they were several MONTHS old.  Doesn't she tell us in her blog that it was just a few weeks?  Our super searchers need to get on that, please. 

She said (I think on FB) that she trained them to sleep through the night from 3 weeks on.  Since FB doesn't have an efficient way to search, I will quote her blog, where she said 6 weeks.

Quote

We trained our children to sleep through the night in a dark room by the time they were six weeks old

Quote

We trained our four children to sleep through the night when they were six weeks old.  Waking up every few hours was taking a toll on my health and my emotions.  

Quote

Mothers hate letting their babies cry. I get that, but crying never hurt anybody. 

Quote

We let them cry until they feel asleep. If you keep consoling them, they will keep crying for more consoling.

http://lorialexander.blogspot.com/2016/06/training-your-children-benefits-them.html#idc-container

http://lorialexander.blogspot.com/2013/12/sleep-training-babies.html

[usmcmom]

@Koala Thank you!  I knew you would come through for me. Perhaps I need to keep a chart of contradictions between her book and blog. 

Need to find Robert's submission chart to get a good model. Heh. 

[Koala]

She also notes that you don't have to wait until a baby is even a year to begin discipline-

Quote

I don't see anywhere in the Bible that your babies must sleep with you or that you can't allow them to cry or you must wait until they are one years old to discipline. 

 

[usmcmom]

Ack!  "One years old" makes my skin crawl. She was a teacher, for the love of Pete!!  

Lori, ONE is singular; therefore, it requires the singular noun to follow it. You would not say "My husband brought me one red roses." 

My eye is twitching. I just can't with these people. 

[slickcat79]

6 minutes ago, usmcmom said:

Ack!  "One years old" makes my skin crawl. She was a teacher, for the love of Pete!!  

Lori, ONE is singular; therefore, it requires the singular noun to follow it. You would not say "My husband brought me one red roses." 

My eye is twitching. I just can't with these people. 

Erika gets me on this kind of thing too. I mean, Erika has horrible spelling and grammar to begin with, but it bugs me how she writes out "8-years-old". Correct: We let our daughter do XYZ because it was appropriate for an 8-year-old. Wrong: We let our daughter to XYZ when she was 8-years-old. /pedantic rant

http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/04/alot-is-better-than-you-at-everything.html

[smittykins]

1 hour ago, usmcmom said:

She decided to homeschool Ryan when he was in sixth grade. She was sure he would have been labeled ADD had he been tested so they just took him out of school. At home, he read a lot, did some math and ate and played.  He also got to go surfing a lot with his cousin.  Funny how Lori demands self control and obedience from children but when it's her child, she certainly can't expect him to sit in a chair for a whole school day and behave appropriately.  Also, if she suspected ADD, why not have the child tested so she could be aware of the best ways for him to learn.  She did the same with Steven - homeschooling him from fifth through eight grades. Again, he did not like school or sitting for long periods of time. 

Because ADD is an invention of Big Pharma?(I don't know how many times I've seen that on FB.)

[Hisey]

For someone who hates sexual immorality, Lori is all fired up to defend the guy who "went too far" on her sixteenth birthday. That's what this crucification of Mary Ann is about. She had the nerve to say that Lori was nearly raped, and this offends Lori. Perhaps she feels there is a stigma about it? Perhaps she feels sorry for the poor young man who is being falsely accused. After all, should he have had to ask permission? Boys will be boys.

OTOH, if a young lady had done something like that to 16-year old Ryan or Steven, I suspect Lori would be up in arms, shouting about modesty and thongs.

10 minutes ago, slickcat79 said:

Erika gets me on this kind of thing too. I mean, Erika has horrible spelling and grammar to begin with, but it bugs me how she writes out "8-years-old". Correct: We let our daughter do XYZ because it was appropriate for an 8-year-old. Wrong: We let our daughter to XYZ when she was 8-years-old. /pedantic rant

http://hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com/2010/04/alot-is-better-than-you-at-everything.html

No offense, but I think it's "8-year old". I don't believe there is ever a reason to put a hyphen between "year" and "old."

[mango_fandango]

15 minutes ago, Hisey said:

For someone who hates sexual immorality, Lori is all fired up to defend the guy who "went too far" on her sixteenth birthday. That's what this crucification of Mary Ann is about. She had the nerve to say that Lori was nearly raped, and this offends Lori. Perhaps she feels there is a stigma about it? Perhaps she feels sorry for the poor young man who is being falsely accused. After all, should he have had to ask permission? Boys will be boys.

OTOH, if a young lady had done something like that to 16-year old Ryan or Steven, I suspect Lori would be up in arms, shouting about modesty and thongs.

No offense, but I think it's "8-year old". I don't believe there is ever a reason to put a hyphen between "year" and "old."

I've only ever seen "8-year-old". Or just 8 year old.

[molecule]

15 minutes ago, Hisey said:

No offense, but I think it's "8-year old". I don't believe there is ever a reason to put a hyphen between "year" and "old."

Both Grammar Girl and Associated Press show a hyphen between "year" and "old."

[Jellybean]

I would write 'an 8-year-old' too...

Off to see if the Internet can settle this. Come on, Internet, don't let me down!

ETA:

Quote

Many people get confused about when to use hyphens when writing ages. Here's a Quick and Dirty Tip that will help: When the age is an adjective that comes before the noun and modifies the noun, or when the age is a noun, hyphenate.
 

My eight-year-old neighbor wrote a poem about commas for National Grammar Day.

That 70-year-old with the purple hoodie loves Justin Bieber.

When the age is part of an adjective phrase after the noun, don't hyphenate.

Charlie Sheen is 45 years old

His twin sons are nearly two years old.

from http://www.quickanddirtytips.com/education/grammar/are-you-using-hyphens-correctly