BOOK REVIEW: "The Power of a Transformed Wife"

[polecat]

Just popping in to say that if one is going to issue a wholesale denial of something being in one's book, one should ensure that that something is not in the FREE SAMPLE of that book ... you know, because then people can easily click on the FREE SAMPLE and see for themselves that that something is indeed in the book without ever having to actually buy said book.

 

Dumbass.

[molecule]

Today's post is about how she was never nearly raped: https://thetransformedwife.com/the-time-i-was-never-nearly-raped/

Here's a sample:

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So I appreciate the insincere troll’s comment trying to make a big to-do about nothing as it gives me the opportunity to not only set the record straight but to give my views on this important matter. To say this is near-rape is not only maliciously wrong, but it minimizes all the women who are truly raped or “nearly raped.”

Apparently, anyone who disagrees with her is now a troll--even when the comments are thoughtful and sympathetic to Lori for having experienced what she did.

[Koala]

I typed out a long review of Lori's post today...there's just so much, but I deleted it all.  This comment by Lori Alexander needs to stand alone:
 

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We have just as big a problem today it seems with female teasing and promiscuity leading guys on. Guys still need to stop when told “No” but young women who claim to be Christians must stop wearing the skimpy thong bathing suits in front of the young men or a bra-less dress or shirt that the guys can look right down into and see everything, then wonder why the guys are making unwanted sexual advances. Entrapment is illegal for police and it should be illegal for women too.  To believe that men must just control themselves no matter how a woman dresses or acts is just plain wrong. 

According to Lori it is "plain wrong" to think a man should control himself if a women isn't dressed in a way that Lori feels is modest.

Someone please screenshot that comment before she deletes it.

 

https://thetransformedwife.com/the-time-i-was-never-nearly-raped/

[alba]

Where the fuck are all these women in thong bathing suits? I have never in my life seen one IRL. Ever.

[FundieWatcher]

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 I mostly ignore the trolls

A lie if there ever was one. 

Here is the best I can do screenshot wise. It should be illegal for women to dress in ways Lori believes are provocative. What constitution? 

[Loveday]

Not the only lie in that post. She says her sister warned her not to read the trolls' reviews, but:

"There is one review (yes, I peeked), ..."

She peeked at the reviews, y'all. Just peeked. She did NOT thoroughly read them, and she certainly did not respond to each and every one of them with the same canned reply and then later on delete all her responses. Oh, no. Lori just...peeked.

I think my eyes are broken from rolling them so much.  

 

[Koala]

I have a strong feeling today's post will be heavily edited or deleted.  I am going to copy it, because I believe it is one of the most telling posts Lori has ever written.

@Curious or any of the mods- please feel free to delete this (with my apologies) if it's not allowed.

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Amazon allows anyone to write a review of a book without purchasing it, so I am receiving a number of one star reviews from trolls who haven’t read my book but are on a crusade to discredit it. I mostly ignore the trolls, and my sister warned me to not read their reviews. (She just finished my book and loved it!) No one likes being continually insulted and slandered, however, but when I read Paul’s persecution my woes cannot compare. God is never surprised, especially by opposition.“Therefore we do not lose heart, but though our outer man is decaying, yet our inner man is being renewed day by day. For our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory.” (2 Corinthians 4:16, 17)

There is one review (yes, I peeked), however, that I want to respond to since it is so far from reality. “Lastly, her description of the near-rape horrified me and I am terribly sorry that she had to go through that. But I heard absolutely nothing about whether or not she went straight to her parents, his parents, the principal of the school, and the police, who should all have been IMMEDIATELY informed. In doing so, you not only protect others, but you might also save the poor guy from a life behind bars. She says nothing about the aftermath of this, and I believe that is crucial to her credibility. I am waiting to hear about what happened here… I am hoping she will clarify this.”

So let me clarify this for her as I was hardly “near-raped,”and there was nothing to report to anyone. The summer before I turned sixteen, I was going to the beach often with a group of high school friends. One of the boys in the group was good-looking and I had a crush on him. My mom would not let me date until sixteen, so on my sixteenth birthday he asked me out and of course, I was excited to go. He took me to the drive-in theater where, for you who are too young to know, we watched movies from the comfort of our car.

As the movie began, we snuggled up together and soon after, he began to kiss me. The next thing I knew he slowly push me over on my back, my feet still firmly planted on the floor of the car, and immediately I knew this was not something I wanted or was enjoying. I said to him, “I don’t want to do this. Please take me home now.” He immediately pulled himself up, started the car, and angrily drove me home. That’s it. No attempt to feel me, no trying to undress me, just a bit too frisky and aggressive for this young and inexperienced teenager. I felt no fear, but certainly was disappointed that this guy who I had liked had a bigger interest in making out than he did in enjoying the evening with me. (I had a lot to learn about guys!) We never dated again.

So I appreciate the insincere troll’s comment trying to make a big to-do about nothing as it gives me the opportunity to not only set the record straight but to give my views on this important matter. To say this is near-rape is not only maliciously wrong, but it minimizes all the women who are truly raped or “nearly raped.” Imagine if every woman who had a man make an unwanted  sexual advance to them simply said, “I don’t want to do this. Please take me home now,” and the man’s response was to start the car and take her home. Is this not proper dating etiquette or has feminism taken us so far that we are to have all men everywhere ask permission before making any affectionate or sexual advances?

“Hey, Lori, do you mind if I kiss you now?

“I like the feel of your warmth on my shoulder, can we hug now?”

“Would you mind if we went a bit further?”

If you have grown up in highly-sexualized America without any godly parental teaching, you understand that many guys will try to go as far as they can with the women they date. Unless we want to legislate all physical relationships in dating, we have to recognize that worldly “love” has a sexual component to it. Do we really expect every young woman who finds herself in my situation to have her mom call the high school principal each time a guy tried to make out with her?

“Hi, Principal Smith, this is Mrs. Falk and my daughter went out on another date this week with one of your students who stepped over the bounds of being a gentleman by pushing himself on top of her. I know this is my sixth report this year, but just because my daughter is a cheerleader does not mean these guys should be trying to take advantage of her. Are you talking to their parents?”

“I am so sorry to hear this, Mrs. Falk, but you can call his parents directly and discuss this with them. Is this something the police should be involved with?  

“Oh, no. Once Lori told him to stop and take her home, he stopped and took her home.”

“Well, maybe you should encourage your daughter not to date, or to make clear to her dates exactly what is and is not acceptable to her before the date starts.”

If this was a Christian high school, I might see it but really, a public school with a thousand hot-blooded testosterone filled teenager guys? This would be impossible for any school to police. My mom grew up before the 60s sexual revolution but she still understood young men and their sexual attraction to females. That’s what young guys and girls do unless they are taught otherwise.

Anyone who reads what I write knows that we taught our children to not go out on single dates until they were eighteen years old, and even then encouraged them to only single date the godly ones they thought were potentially marriage material. They knew all about modesty and keeping the marriage bed pure which includes before marriage. I was not brought up with this stronger coaching, so I had to say “No” to most of the guys I dated.

We have just as big a problem today it seems with female teasing and promiscuity leading guys on. Guys still need to stop when told “No” but young women who claim to be Christians must stop wearing the skimpy thong bathing suits in front of the young men or a bra-less dress or shirt that the guys can look right down into and see everything, then wonder why the guys are making unwanted sexual advances. Entrapment is illegal for police and it should be illegal for women too. To believe that men must just control themselves no matter how a woman dresses or acts is just plain wrong. Did I lead some of my dates on by my skimpy cheerleading outfits, short shorts, and flirting? I am sure I did, but thank God the guys I dated still had the moral fiber to respect a woman when she said, “Okay, that is enough.” For godly young adults, it is far better to group date and stay away from any dating just to date. Instead, only single date those who are marriage material and godly, and if they make unwanted sexual advances, maybe you need to reconsider if this is the one for you.

My near-rape experience is a figment of a troll’s imagination, but it points out a huge issue in today’s world. Our world has much real sexual abuse, and no sex before marriage is defensible. But it does a huge disservice to society to create sexual abuse in places it does not exist. Let’s be protective, but let’s not try to change the world into one that takes the minor and blows it up into something it is not. Practicing sin is the condition of the unredeemed heart and that condition will only change when Jesus enters the heart and makes it brand new. We as believers live in this world, so let’s be careful and cautious, not to be naive to the world’s ways. Don’t be swayed when it comes to insincere trolls who violate their own values to try to deceive others just because they dislike what the church has taught for the last 20 centuries until now, the “New Age of Women” which is not godly at all.

https://thetransformedwife.com/the-time-i-was-never-nearly-raped/

Did you catch the part about her sister telling her not to read the comments, but she "peeked" at one and just had to respond?  Please Lori, you are all over those comments.  Going on a deleting spree doesn't mean it didn't happen.

Also, if you want to pass "the time you were never nearly raped" as no big deal, you probably need to delete the following lines from your 2014 account of what happened:

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Then he threw me down onto the front seat and laid on top of me. 

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I will never forget that drive home. He was so mad that he hit the median in the middle of the road and our car almost rolled over.

http://lorialexander.blogspot.com/2014/07/my-dating-life-and-meeting-ken.html

2 minutes ago, Loveday said:

Not the only lie in that post. She says her sister warned her not to read the trolls' reviews, but:

"There is one review (yes, I peeked), ..."

She peeked at the reviews, y'all. Just peeked. She did NOT thoroughly read them, and she certainly did not respond to each and every one of them with the same canned reply and then later on delete all her responses. Oh, no. Lori just...peeked.

I think my eyes are broken from rolling them so much.  

 

That's the crazy thing!  The pat response wasn't her first one.  She had to delete the first responses she left to leave those, and then she went back and deleted most of the pat responses as well.  But "oops, she peeked"!

[polecat]

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or a bra-less dress or shirt that the guys can look right down into and see everything, then wonder why the guys are making unwanted sexual advances.Entrapment is illegal for police and it should be illegal for women too.  

 

So that dress she wore to her kid's wedding should be illegal because it could be considered entrapment? Good to know.

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

OK -- I'm going to go there using Lori's logic about men being tempted beyond endurance by what women wear.

What was Lori wearing on this date that the guy thought he had "permission" to lay her (throw her?) on the seat and begin kissing -- as probably a prelude in his mind to something more if she didn't resist?

I'd never say that how a woman dresses means she's asking for it -- but Lori does.  So what was she wearing?

Has she ever considered that by her standards of modesty she was dressed provocatively and that sent out a certain message which prompted the boy to act the way he did?  Did she make this poor boy stumble?  Again using her logic that women's clothes are the downfall of godly men.  

[molecule]

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Did I lead some of my dates on by my skimpy cheerleading outfits, short shorts, and flirting? I am sure I did, but thank God the guys I dated still had the moral fiber to respect a woman when she said, “Okay, that is enough.” 

She acknowledges that a guy's moral fiber can give him the ability to have self control when he's with a flirtatious girl in a short skirt--but only when it comes to her. Anyone else who is flirting while wearing a short skirt is just asking for it, and the guy shouldn't be expected to have self control.

How does she not see how she contradicts herself? Aargh.

[FundieWatcher]

Do conservatives still claim to be the party of small government? How can 'make it illegal to wear tight or low cut clothing' fit in with small government? How are you going to get by the US Constitution and the court cases that have already ruled this illegal? 

Yet Lori is a wise woman. :/

[molecule]

She's been deleting her comments on Amazon again today.

[Koala]

What is her thought process behind this??  She keeps leaving comments, deleting them, replacing them with other comments, deleting them again...and on and on it goes.

Does she really think her readers believe she "just took a peek" at that one comment?

 

[Emilycharlotte]

I try to give people the benefit of the doubt, so I always thought it possible that Lori's inconsistencies were a combination of fantasy, gullibility and lack of critical thinking skills. But this proves that she just flat-out, intentionally, knowingly lies. So I guess I am the stupid, gullible one!

 I also think she is coming completely unglued because she can't delete her bad reviews.  And wow, are her true colors showing!

[molecule]

26 minutes ago, Koala said:

What is her thought process behind this??  She keeps leaving comments, deleting them, replacing them with other comments, deleting them again...and on and on it goes.

 

The only thing I can think is that she wants to respond to her persecutors but doesn't want to leave evidence of her ungraciousness permanently.. She leaves the comments up long enough that reviewers have a chance to see her response--but then she takes them down because she doesn't want people who see this later to think she is being negative. 

[wikinggirl]

Mary Ann, the woman who commented on the near-rape responded to Lori's blogpost on Amazon.

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I have the Kindle edition. If you read the chapter "My Life Growing Up", you will find the content I mentioned. I thought it was all right to review even if we disagreed with portions of it. I just happened to read Mrs. Alexander's blog to learn that I am an "insincere troll" (her words exactly). I actually liked portions of the book. I simply pointed out points that had not been addressed. She didn't give all the details in the book, and I didn't know, as didn't clarify that she wasn't forced; that she was in complete control of the situation. Her putting my comment out like that as if I am some kind of malicious hater is absolutely unacceptable. It only confirms my concerns about other things in what she writes -- she cannot abide anybody or anything that questions anything she says. I tried to be polite and disinterested. I guess I wasn't good enough. 

 

It's pretty low, even for Lori's standard, to call someone out like that in a blogpost, but I'm kind of glad it came back and bit her in the ass, because she can't delete Mary Ann's comment on Amazon! (Although I do feel sorry for Mary Ann, that review was far from a troll review!)

[Koala]

One of Lori's regular readers just chimed in on FB to agree with Lori that people who haven't read the book shouldn't be leaving reviews.  Lori, in an ironic twist, had to delete the comment because she doesn't want anyone to point out that she has been asking people who haven't read the book to leave reviews.

In Lori's mind, it's not illogical at all to ask people who haven't read to leave positive reviews, while simultaneously shaming people who haven't read it and leave negative reviews.

 

[Imrlgoddess]

A truly gracious, pious woman knows how to say "thank you, but that's not exactly how it happened, perhaps I exaggerated or was unclear, let me attend to that".  No, this busy body has to put someone down.  I get it, it was the 60's/70's, the not-right-now's...and yes, to use her verbiage, in today's "ungodly" society we do need clarification-men and women alike.  We need it because of situations like hers.  Hers may have ended with little issue, but not everyone is so accommodating.  A godly woman would know that her experience may be a teaching tool to someone else, not, a shaming tool.  

Honestly if I hadn't stepped away from the church years ago...her attitude and words would be enough to give me serious pause and take a step back from it now.  

[AlwaysDiscerning]

 

 

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The Transformed Wife No, she said I was almost raped. Amazon clearly posts who had purchased the book and who has not. Not one reviewer who has given me one star has purchased my book.

Lori doesn't get the difference between purchased and read. Even if you do purchase it, that dosen't mean you read it. Makes me want to buy it and throw it away and then give a review...wow verified purchase, I must know what I am talking about!

[polecat]

1 hour ago, wikinggirl said:

Mary Ann, the woman who commented on the near-rape responded to Lori's blogpost on Amazon.

It's pretty low, even for Lori's standard, to call someone out like that in a blogpost, but I'm kind of glad it came back and bit her in the ass, because she can't delete Mary Ann's comment on Amazon! (Although I do feel sorry for Mary Ann, that review was far from a troll review!)

 

Lori is a coward. She shoots out these vicious, hateful verbal attacks, leaves them up just long enough for the reviewer to see them on Amazon, and then deletes them before she can be called out by anyone else. THEN she runs back to her little blog, and gossips about them from the privacy of HER safe space, where no one can ever call her out and her delete finger is always at the ready to eliminate any opposing viewpoints. 

Some fundies genuinely believe they're doing the right thing. Some fundies were raised fundy and just don't really know any different. Lori is just plain evil, and there is literally no excuse for the shit she pulls. She's just a nasty piece of work, and her attack on Mary Ann is just the lowest of the low. 

[Hisey]

5 hours ago, alba said:

Where the fuck are all these women in thong bathing suits? I have never in my life seen one IRL. Ever.

I've seen one, once in my entire life. And until recently, I lived in a warm climate where everyone wore bathings suits during  the long, hot summer season. Even so, I've seen one woman wearing a thong.It is not my favorite style, I admit. But thong-clad women has not been a big problem in my life, or in my marriage.

[laPapessaGiovanna]

She's a pathological liar. Like Trump. Her relationship with truth is...creative. 

She twists and bends and shapes reality to her convenience of the moment. When her convenience changes her version changes accordingly. But lies have short legs and don't lead her far before she gets caught contradicting herself. 

[Imrlgoddess]

I try to think of the fact that she lives in SoCal.  I do remember seeing  a few...let's call them, sights, while I lived in Oceanside.  Maybe the afternoon out at the beach scarred her for life and left Ken with affinity for the thong.  Not saying she saw more than one...but hey, one might have been enough to do the job!  

Personally?  I think the only place I've ever seen a thong not peeking out of a pair of hip huggers was in a strip joint.  

Simmer down Lori, it's only a butt. 

[Colby]

This really upset me today.  She told me that I was wrong.  Not "I don't agree with you, or this is perhaps why I think the way I do, but YOU ARE WRONG"  Oh, btw, the part she deleted from my comments was me expressing that I didn't think that the internet comment was a troll, but just a person who didn't agree with Lori.  I wish I had saved what I wrote before she "modified" it, but I didn't.

[Emilycharlotte]

21 minutes ago, laPapessaGiovanna said:

She's a pathological liar. Like Trump. Her relationship with truth is...creative. 

She twists and bends and shapes reality to her convenience of the moment. When her convenience changes her version changes accordingly. But lies have short legs and don't lead her far before she gets caught contradicting herself. 

I agree with you. And while most people caught in a lie are embarrassed, it's a hallmark of the pathological liar to just keep spinning new ones, never admitting they lied, no matter how obvious it is or how contradictory their statements are.