Lori Alexander 10: Fickle Brained Woman (and she would know)

[Imrlgoddess]

Perusing around Blessed Lori's Holy Facebook page, I find that God made maleness.  He designed their manhood and 'tis a gift.  I don't recall...however...ever seeing such a post about God gifting women with their femaleness....  Perhaps God just slapped us together with the leftovers thus our weak natures...

Also, IRT the whole kitchen issue, *sigh*   now ya'll know that heathen feminists don't cook!  They make their poor hard working husbands do all the chores and fix their own dinner after they've been in the ebil world slaving away at it! And ya know, if he wasn't coming home making his own not as nourishing food (cause ya know he's a dude and can't cook for himself) you'd get your 10 minutes plus loob.  That's Ken verified!  Your man won't deny you the goods if he's well fed and you're not a feminist!

Gah, FJ'ers haven't ya'll learned anything from this super knowledgeable older woman??  

Happy kitchen = Well fed husband = 

[Hisey]

7 hours ago, molecule said:

Lori's writing process:

1. Pick topic that she thinks feminists would oppose.
2. Start with a paragraph or two about the evils of feminism, being sure to make lots of assumptions about what feminism is.
3. Make a mental list of all the ways she failed as a wife and mother. Use that list to generate a prescription of how to be a godly correct wife/mother.
4. Write the rest of the post preaching about how easy it is to do all these things.
5. If compassion pops into her head, squash those thoughts right away! Likewise, squash any thoughts of gray areas, middle ground, or unusual circumstances.
6. Use Ken as an example of all husbands throughout time.
7. Revise and edit the post, ensuring the following:
   • Make sure at least one sentence includes both feminism and satan.
   • If cooking or food are mentioned in the post, use the word "nutritious" at least one time.
   • If sex is mentioned, include a reminder of "ten minutes and lube."
   • Include three statements that women should not be working outside the home.
   • Blame women for the downfall of society at least once but preferably twice.
   • Remind readers that she had a post that went viral. This doesn't have to appear in every post, but it should appear in one out of every three posts.

You forgot: Make vast generalizations about something "women" do (must be something bad). Example: Women don't cook anymore, women are too emotional, women need protection, women can't handle a job and managing a home, women love to control men, women like to manipulate men by wearing immodest clothes, women can't make rational decisions without men's help.

Be sure to indicate that this means *all* women. And don't bother her about "exceptions." Feminists always bring up exceptions! That's another reason they stink

[desertvixen]

Quote

Lori says:

It is in the kitchen that nourishing food should be fixed by the mother of the home for what they prepare for the family to eat determines what kind of health a family will have. If a mother takes the time to shop for food as close as possible to the way the Lord created it and fixes it in a way that is appetizing for her family, she will be doing one of the most important jobs of being a wife and mother.

I wonder what grocery store the Lord recommends...

And while I might not always feed my kid "healthy"' stuff (she hates big salads but LOVES veggie trays), I also don't make my daughter feel like crap about her body.

[Koala]

4 hours ago, Hisey said:

You forgot: Make vast generalizations about something "women" do (must be something bad). Example: Women don't cook anymore, women are too emotional, women need protection, women can't handle a job and managing a home, women love to control men, women like to manipulate men by wearing immodest clothes, women can't make rational decisions without men's help.

Be sure to indicate that this means *all* women. And don't bother her about "exceptions." Feminists always bring up exceptions! That's another reason they stink

She provides this service for men as well.  Just yesterday she was explaining to a woman that her husband was clearly confused about his likes/dislikes, because according to The Godly Mentor:

Quote

No matter how long your dresses are, your husband will still notice! Men, in our culture, don't like hairy legs! 

None of them!  Not a single one.  

Who the hell is that woman anyway?  Thinking she knows her husband better than Lori knows him...Ridiculous!

It just so happens that Lori speaks for the God of the Universe, and he specifically told her that men in America don't like hairy legs!  That's Bible.  Look it up!

[lawfulevil]

Every time Lori gets absolutist about "what men like/dislike" I feel pretty bad for her. I mean, she's awful, but she's obviously self-soothing and telling herself that ALL men are narcissistic misogynist marital rapists (and who knows what else- Ken Alexander the orthodontic consultant from California DOES think that molestation and incest are normal) with unreasonably high standards for others and pitifully low standards for themselves. If she didn't believe that all "Christian" men are like that, it'd be even harder for her to tolerate her admittedly horrendous marriage.

Whatever, Lori, right now I'm cleaning high-end vintage French cookware* I thriftily bought off Ebay. What the fuck are you doing in the kitchen these days? Washing the salad spinner?

Spoiler

There's a nice paella pan ending tomorrow that I'd snap up if I ever made paella... it needs some love but the price is right.

 

[AlwaysDiscerning]

If no men like hairy legs then it stands to reason no way would they want a hairy pussy. So come on Lori , shouldn't all women get Brazilian waxes? If the goal is to be hair free, clearly Brazilian waxing must be godly.

[lilwriter85]

 

6 hours ago, lawfulevil said:

Every time Lori gets absolutist about "what men like/dislike" I feel pretty bad for her. I mean, she's awful, but she's obviously self-soothing and telling herself that ALL men are narcissistic misogynist marital rapists (and who knows what else- Ken Alexander the orthodontic consultant from California DOES think that molestation and incest are normal) with unreasonably high standards for others and pitifully low standards for themselves. If she didn't believe that all "Christian" men are like that, it'd be even harder for her to tolerate her admittedly horrendous marriage.

Whatever, Lori, right now I'm cleaning high-end vintage French cookware* I thriftily bought off Ebay. What the fuck are you doing in the kitchen these days? Washing the salad spinner?

  Reveal hidden contents

There's a nice paella pan ending tomorrow that I'd snap up if I ever made paella... it needs some love but the price is right.

 

I sometimes think that Lori does that "what men like/dislike" generalization crap because deep down it pisses her off that many women have husbands that are probably kinder than Ken. I suspect that Ken for a long time has somehow drilled her into that men who are different from him are weak and not "godly". So if Lori hears about a husband and father who cooks for his family, he's a weak ungodly man who is controlled by his feminist wife. Her kitchen post was a total bullshit "feminists don't cook" or care about their kids rant. She took a jab at SAHMs who don't spend much time in their homes and again I wonder if Ken is a control freak who doesn't like Lori to do much outside of the home like volunteering or going out to bible study.

 

[Free Jana Duggar]

16 hours ago, Imrlgoddess said:

Perusing around Blessed Lori's Holy Facebook page, I find that God made maleness.  He designed their manhood and 'tis a gift. 

 

I saw that as well. And she wonders why people think she hates women.

Of course we shouldn't bash men.  Her post would have been fine if she would occasionally write something positive about women as well. Instead, all she talks about are how immodest and controlling we are and how we spend too much money etc..

Way to encourage women, Lori.  Take some lessons from Beth Moore. She believes similar to you, but she is a real encouragement to women and has a lot more class than you.

[polecat]

8 hours ago, Koala said:

She provides this service for men as well.  Just yesterday she was explaining to a woman that her husband was clearly confused about his likes/dislikes, because according to The Godly Mentor:

None of them!  Not a single one.  

Who the hell is that woman anyway?  Thinking she knows her husband better than Lori knows him...Ridiculous!

It just so happens that Lori speaks for the God of the Universe, and he specifically told her that men in America don't like hairy legs!  That's Bible.  Look it up!

It must be painful to have a husband who sees you not as a person with thoughts and feelings of your own but as nothing more than a fuck toy in which to stick his dick. No wonder she's so bitchy. 

I don't shave because my legs just don't grow hair. It's a weird quirk of nature (and facet of my disease), but even if they did, I couldn't shave because a nick could lead to life-threatening cellulitis. I'm not going to die just so that my husband could enjoy fuzz-free sex. I'm pretty sure he wouldn't want that, either, and I don't even have to ask him. I already know what his answer would be.

[smittykins]

59 minutes ago, AlwaysDiscerning said:

If no men like hairy legs then it stands to reason no way would they want a hairy pussy. So come on Lori , shouldn't all women get Brazilian waxes? If the goal is to be hair free, clearly Brazilian waxing must be godly.

I wonder what she'd say if someone asked her, "Since you claim to speak for the God of the Universe, why did He give us that hair in the first place?"

[jerkit]

I don't remember the context, but I vividly remember saying that pubic hair removal was ungodly. Maybe during the short time I was in her private FB group?

[iheartchacos]

I don't remember the context, but I vividly remember saying that pubic hair removal was ungodly. Maybe during the short time I was in her private FB group?

She believes women didn't start removing hair until porn took off...you know a few years ago. If your man likes you bare, he must like little girls. Can't remember where I read her thoughts on that either, lol

[jerkit]

2 minutes ago, iheartchacos said:

She believes women didn't start removing hair until porn took off...you know a few years ago. If your man likes you bare, he must like little girls. Can't remember where I read her thoughts on that either, lol

Yes! That's what I remember too!

and she (of course) completely rejected the idea that some women might prefer to be bare.

[desertvixen]

@AlwaysDiscerning, @jerkit, and @iheartchacos

I'm sure smooth pubic area = porn in Lori's book.  I'm pretty sure it's been discussed before.

I hate the body hair police.  You wanna shave everything, go ahead, be my guest.  I don't grow much hair on my lower legs, so I generally only shave my legs when they're going to be shown off.  I actually haven't been able to shave for a few weeks because while I was out conducting unladylike physical exercise in my shorts in front of (gasp) men because I'm an evil feminist working mother who's IN THE MILITARY, and rolling around in the grass and using leaky sandbags, my legs got bit the eff up.  

Same token, you don't want to shave anything - that's also great.

[jerkit]

The most christian woman I know - my cousin - is a pastor's wife. Her husband specifically asked her to stop shaving because it saved them money. 

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

Seriously?    Um  how much money did he think she was spending on shaving?  You can zip zip legs and underarms with a generic Lady Bic in the shower using bath soap. Takes a couple of minutes. I do it every day.  I can use the razor for 2-4 weeks before it gets too dull.

And did he stop shaving and grow a beard to help save money?

[iheartchacos]

Another girl grandchild born for LorKen today.

[Grimalkin]

On August 3, 2016 at 0:06 PM, polecat said:

bbm -- Actually, yes, I think it might be. I don't know any adult dancers, but all my friends with dancing daughters are constantly (constantly, constantly, constantly) posting pictures of their daughters in the exact same poses. Constantly! lol. And in their costumes. And videos of them at their dances and recitals. And more pictures of them posing. And posing in line at Disneyland. And posing in the parking lot at Kroger. And posing at the park. And dancing at the beach. I've ***never danced (IFB, you now, dancing is worse than premarital sex y'all), but from what I can gather, that is really a pretty normal thing for dancers. It seems like a lifestyle more than a hobby.

 

**Although dancer or no, I've been tempted a couple times to post my own pictures of extreme contortionist poses since I am NOT a dancer but I AM hypermobile thanks to EDS, lol. I want to show off my own fancy pants, circus-like moves ...  

       I have to say I side eye adult women who constantly post selfies. I would be interested in your contortions, don't post them every day though. I know someone who posts selfies that don't look like her. It's so weird.

[feministxtian]

Going back to the "forsaken kitchen" thing...I DESTROYED my kitchen today...4 lbs of homemade chicken nuggets. Poor hubby spent about an hour scrubbing our little galley kitchen after I was done. 

Shaving...hubs doesn't care one way or another. He knows that in the winter I resemble Chewbacca (here in Vegas there's a couple of months of non-shorts weather) and the rest of the time I shave if I think about it. TBH, hubs doesn't notice a lot of things...this is the man who thinks my lumpy, bumpy, stretch-marked, saggy, 52 year old body is hot enough to leave the lights on when we're getting busy. I think it's safe to say that hubs is not terribly hung up on externals. 

[Koala]

Ken:

Quote

What are the weights we are called to lay aside? They are anything that hinder our race of faith and take our eyes off of our perfect Savior. The weights of the things of this world can be the Internet, television, smart phones, hobbies, the desire to accumulate wealth, too much value in sports or in our children, or anything that distracts us from spending any time in the Word and prayer.

Now I kind of understand why Ken didn't spend a lot of time with his babies when they were little.  It's not that they were "uninteresting" as he once suggested, it was that he was trying to lay aside the weight of parenthood. Because Jesus!

Here Ken, let me help you:

Quote

What are the weights we are called to lay aside? They are anything that hinder our race of faith and take our eyes off of our perfect Savior. The weights of the things of this world can be the Internet, television, smart phones, hobbies, the desire to accumulate wealth, too much value in BASKETBALL, BLOGGING, GOING VIRAL, VACATION SEX, or anything that distracts us from spending any time in the Word and prayer.

Wait, that's not right though, because according to Ken Alexander:

Quote

Basketball and sex. They are/were pretty sacred to me. 

 

[AmazonGrace]

I don't understand how  people become better Christians by laying aside their kids. 

[desertvixen]

14 hours ago, feministxtian said:

I think it's safe to say that hubs is not terribly hung up on externals. 

I would say Lori definitely is, though.  Sometimes her blogging kind of reminds me of Princess Audrey from Disney's Descendants, who's against people learning how to make themselves look nice - because if everyone is pretty, what will she have going for her?

Also, for all the talk about husbands sacrificing for wives, there's a ton of emphasis put on externals.

[Koala]

For all Lori's insistence that young women should have babies and keep their homes, she hasn't as much as mentioned the 2 new grandchildren that have arrived this summer.

I expected her to at least crow about the daughter & sil who "don't have all of their ducks in a row", and how godly they are for obeying the Lord's Lori's command that they have children regardless of their financial situation.

Wonder if they've told her to put a lid on it...  Can you imagine what the other grandparents think when they read Grandma Lori's blog?

They've got to worry that Lori will flick their grandchild's little cheeks or go after them with her leather strap.  Honestly, you'd think they'd be worried sick.  

I'll tell you straight up- if I was Lori's dil/sil son/daughter there is NO WAY I would allow her to ever see her grandchildren.  May sound harsh, but Lori (by her own account) is abusive towards children.   What would she do if a little one reached up and pulled her hair or grabbed her glasses?  

[Gemini]

12 hours ago, Koala said:

Can you imagine what the other grandparents think when they read Grandma Lori's blog?

They've got to worry that Lori will flick their grandchild's little cheeks or go after them with her leather strap.  Honestly, you'd think they'd be worried sick.  

I'll tell you straight up- if I was Lori's dil/sil son/daughter there is NO WAY I would allow her to ever see her grandchildren.  May sound harsh, but Lori (by her own account) is abusive towards children.   What would she do if a little one reached up and pulled her hair or grabbed her glasses?  

if my Granddaughter's other grandparents were like Lori, I'd feel physically sick every time she went near them!

Fortuantly my little grandbaby is loved, adored and treated with the respect that all children deserve, by all sides.

How far away does Lori's Grandchildren live? She certainly doesn't seem to mention being with them a lot and I wonder if that's a deliberate choice by her kids, who see her for the abusive monster she is, or by Lori who doesn't seem to enjoy/love/bother with babies/kids/anyone who isn't her/Ken/the pearls.

Im lucky enough to have my daughter's family living with me and the best moments are when my 19 month old Grandaughter gets up early and crawls in to my bed for cuddles.

I'm so privileged to have those moments and as I experience more and more of them it makes me sad how much my own mum didn't care to be around her Grandchildren (or even her kids)  Sad not for me but for her as she has missed out on so much. And, as she gets older, it's becoming clear how little her grandchildren care for her, in fact There is no relationship there at all. Hardly surprising when 2 of her 3 children don't even care to be around her either.

Lori is fast becoming a sad, lonely woman with no one but her child molester apologiser husband to spend her old age with. 

And in all honestly, she deserves nothing more 

 

 

[kpmom]

2 hours ago, Gemini said:

How far away does Lori's Grandchildren live? She certainly doesn't seem to mention being with them a lot and I wonder if that's a deliberate choice by her kids, who see her for the abusive monster she is, or by Lori who doesn't seem to enjoy/love/bother with babies/kids/anyone who isn't her/Ken/the pearls.

 

 

 

I had noticed she had mentioned she was "going to meet" her new grandchild, Cassi's baby I believe.

Meaning she wasn't present for the birth.  I might be reading more into that than I should, but I was a little surprised Cassi didn't ask her mom to be there for the birth of her first child.