Josiah Duggar - Part 3 Now with lost heart pieces

[halcionne]

Did we ever find out how old the Marjorie's mom was? She looked so young. I always wondered if Marjorie didn't have some pressure as well to get married young.

I have a middle school aged daughter and many of the parents of her friends are 30-32, married living in stucco mini-mansions. There are so many 4-5 generation families , each generation married before 20. These moms fully expect their daughters to marry at 18-19.

I'm happy that the courtship is over. I just hope both kids are being supported emotionally and not put down for any failures or sins.

Not sure if this was answered, as I'm catching up on the thread. I have September 1976 for Marjorie's mom, but I got that from spokeo/radaris/one of those type of sites, so take it with a grain of salt.

[singsingsing]

No one's knows anything, correct...not even you. Your comment does the exact same thing that you seem to be commenting against, assuming.

Unless you're a Duggar, you have no idea what they think.

? Of course I'm assuming, just like everyone else, and I never suggested otherwise. That's why I started both paragraphs with, "I don't think" and not, "The Almighty singsingsing, resident wet blanket, has decreed that all assumptions shall cease at once."

[JenniferJuniper]

THIS. :worship:

It's fun to speculate, but unfortunately we will never know because only the people at the time involved know what is going on; also there are (at least) two sides to every story, so if we ever do hear what happened, how do we know it's true? The Duggars aren't strangers to telling lies.

However it's safe to say that Majorie has dodged a bullet and hopefully she can continue on a more suitable path for a 17 year old.

In terms of Siah, that really sucks - I hope Jana & JD are being helpful older siblings to get him through this time. No comfort would ever come out of Mullet and / or JB.

How do we know it sucks for him?

Maybe the courtship wasn't his idea at all. That wisdom teeth video of him was very sad - "I have to have them out now because its really expensive when you're married". WTF were they telling this kid?

He spent 9 months of last year at indoctrination camp and a few months later he's on his way to marrying the a very perky fundie teenybopper who seems thrilled to be on the show. His idea or Jim Bob's? We'll probably never know, but I don't think we can assume he's heartbroken.

[singsingsing]

I honestly think this is the best thing that could have happened to them. Break-ups usually suck at least somewhat, even if you wanted to end it. There's the awkwardness, the knowledge that you may have caused another person pain, and in their case it's all heightened ten-fold because unfortunately it's publicized in tabloids. Josiah never really had a choice to stay out of the spotlight. Maybe Marjorie did, but she's so young and sheltered that I'd be surprised if she fully grasped the implications.

I can't help but wonder if this was a bit of an Elizabeth Munck scenario. Maybe Marjorie and her family were enchanted with the Duggars, but then reality set in and they pulled back. If so, good for them.

I hope this serves as a wake up call for both of them - that this way isn't the only way, that they can have some personal agency and forge their own paths in life beyond what their cult dictates. I hope. Unfortunately sometimes fundies seem to go the opposite direction and decide that a courtship failed because they were too liberal, and double down on the fundamentalism.

I just can't help but think that the Duggars have been through so much upheaval, almost all of it very negative recently that it must be causing some of them to question things.

[nausicaa]

However, I think that there is an audience that enjoys watching other people get married, whether it's the Kardashians, the Duggars, or Kermit and Ms. Piggy.

Of the three sets of celebrities you listed, I'd argue Kermit and Miss Piggy have had the classiest wedding.Great music, cool Art Deco church, and impeccably tailored tuxedo and gown.

[rodgerdodger]

Josiah deleted all photos of him and Marjorie off his instagram. Now THIS is what a teenage breakup should be like! :lol:

[Queen Of Hearts]

There are many possible scenarios about why this relationship broke up, and each one of them leaves me feeling sad for Josiah.

1.) Marjorie was in it for fame. No fame... no wedding.

2.) Marjorie (or her parents) couldn't handle the molestation news. No fault of Josiah's but he still had to suffer as a result.

3.) The courtship wasn't Josiah's idea in the first place... it was pushed on him by Boob for whatever reason Boob thought was logical,

4.) They just discovered they were not compatible... and now Josiah has to have a very public break-up.

Any other theories?

[HarryPotterFan]

Of the three sets of celebrities you listed, I'd argue Kermit and Miss Piggy have had the classiest wedding.Great music, cool Art Deco church, and impeccably tailored tuxedo and gown.

Didn't you hear? Kermit and Miss Piggy broke up!!

http://m.usmagazine.com/entertainment/n ... ell-201558

I'm glad, Kermit deserved better. Hopefully he'll be the next bachelor.

[ShepherdontheRock]

Josiah deleted all photos of him and Marjorie off his instagram. Now THIS is what a teenage breakup should be like! :lol:

Haha actually what happens on teenage breakups is generally the girl scrubs all the insta pictures of them. Meanwhile the guy doesn't change a thing bc he's been mum about it on insta the whole time.

[Rescinded and Mended]

I always had the impression that these two liked each other well enough to enter into courtship, but neither one of them ever acted really smitten with the other. I dug up this older article from when they started courting.

When asked what Siah liked about Marge, the best he could manage was that he was "very impressed with the way [Marjorie] was with her siblings and her love for the Lord."

Further reading reveals Marge's take on it. "I have always admired him and his family," and [she] also revealed that "it was an immediate thing.

And when you go through the rest of the article, the families on each side act like they are more enamored with each other than the kids are.

christiantoday.com/article/19.kids.and.counting.star.josiah.duggar.courtship.marjorie.jackson/52090.htm

[MichellesCrunchyHair]

I always had the impression that these two liked each other well enough to enter into courtship, but neither one of them ever acted really smitten with the other. I dug up this older article from when they started courting.

When asked what Siah liked about Marge, the best he could manage was that he was "very impressed with the way [Marjorie] was with her siblings and her love for the Lord."

Further reading reveals Marge's take on it. "I have always admired him and his family," and [she] also revealed that "it was an immediate thing.

And when you go through the rest of the article, the families on each side act like they are more enamored with each other than the kids are.

christiantoday.com/article/19.kids.and.counting.star.josiah.duggar.courtship.marjorie.jackson/52090.htm

Ha, solid. They really knew nothing about each other at all. It seems like every fundie in their world cites "a love for the Lord" as a top quality that they admire in someone else... it's kind of a go-to compliment that everyone will only be able to smile and nod appreciatively when they hear it.

*edited for riffles*

[drivingmishcrazy]

Josiah deleted all photos of him and Marjorie off his instagram. Now THIS is what a teenage breakup should be like! :lol:

Now he just needs to blast some Pierce The Veil and complain about how love sucks, and we'll be good.

[ClaraOswin]

Here it is in all its snobby glory:

marjoriejackson.wordpress.com

"Your friend, Marjorie."

She wrote a book!?

[ClaraOswin]

So he took down all of the pictures of her on his Instagram page. But...he hasn't changed his profile photo yet. She's still in it. Better take care of that, Si!

[Rachel333]

I'm curious too if he's allowed to stay on social media now that he's not courting anymore.

This is the first public courtship break-up for the Duggar family. I wonder if it will change their opinions on courtship at all the way Zach's breakup did for the Bateses.

A friend of mine who used to be very fundie and involved with Gothard/ATI (and actually she's still pretty fundie even if she no longer agrees with Gothard) recently posted this article about why courtship is flawed. It advocates for pretty much the opposite of courtship, saying the best way to guard your heart is to date multiple people.

When my grandmother dated in middle school (yes, middle school) her parents had one primary rule for her.

The Primary Dating Rule: Don’t go out with the same guy twice in a row.

So if she went out for soda with Bob on Tuesday, she had to go to a movie with Bill on Thursday before she could go to the school dance with Bob on Saturday.

That sounded crazy to me. So, I asked her the rationale behind it. She explained that the lack of exclusivity helped them guard their hearts and kept things from getting too serious too quickly. The lack of exclusivity kept the interactions fun and casual. “The guys wouldn’t even want to kiss you!†She said.

The lack of exclusivity helped the girls guard their hearts and kept the boys from feeling entitled to the girl. How could a boy have a claim to her time, heart or body if she was going out with someone else later that week?

She went on to explain that by the time she graduated from high school, she had gone out on dates with over 20 different guys. This meant that by the time she was 17 years old she knew which Bob she wanted to marry. They got married and stayed married till my grandfather passed away half a century later.

“If I had only gone out with 3 or 4 guys I wouldn’t have known what I wanted in a husband,†she said.

I think it's definitely true that if things don't work out the courtship model actually does a lot more damage to someone's "heart" than traditional dating does.

[CorruptionInc.]

How do we know it sucks for him?

Maybe the courtship wasn't his idea at all. That wisdom teeth video of him was very sad - "I have to have them out now because its really expensive when you're married". WTF were they telling this kid?

He spent 9 months of last year at indoctrination camp and a few months later he's on his way to marrying the a very perky fundie teenybopper who seems thrilled to be on the show. His idea or Jim Bob's? We'll probably never know, but I don't think we can assume he's heartbroken.

I was milling over this at lunch, you are correct - he may be happy it's over!

It's probably safe to say they both dodged a bullet; but whether the alternatives are better for them, who knows?

[greycat]

Josiah deleted all photos of him and Marjorie off his instagram. Now THIS is what a teenage breakup should be like! :lol:

Makes me feel like something happened, because wouldn't the Duggars want it to look like everything was fine and yay we are still friends? LOVE to see someone from this family act and respond like the average teenager. :P

[HarryPotterFan]

Makes me feel like something happened, because wouldn't the Duggars want it to look like everything was fine and yay we are still friends? LOVE to see someone from this family act and respond like the average teenager. :P

I don't think they have any loud, angsty music to blast through the TTH.

[Dandruff]

There are many possible scenarios about why this relationship broke up, and each one of them leaves me feeling sad for Josiah.

1.) Marjorie was in it for fame. No fame... no wedding.

2.) Marjorie (or her parents) couldn't handle the molestation news. No fault of Josiah's but he still had to suffer as a result.

3.) The courtship wasn't Josiah's idea in the first place... it was pushed on him by Boob for whatever reason Boob thought was logical,

4.) They just discovered they were not compatible... and now Josiah has to have a very public break-up.

Any other theories?

I think it's a bit of 1, more of 2, and a lot of sudden concern about money. I believe the relationship did have some substance, but not enough to withstand major stressors, especially given their ages. They were both expecting to live a certain lifestyle with some predictable resources and it was taken away.

[SportsgalAnnie]

I think it's a bit of 1, more of 2, and a lot of sudden concern about money. I believe the relationship did have some substance, but not enough to withstand major stressors, especially given their ages. They were both expecting to live a certain lifestyle with some predictable resources and it was taken away.

Josiah is planning to make a run for it!

[princessmahina]

I don't think they have any loud, angsty music to blast through the TTH.

Perhaps a gory hymn would work then? Or some of that violent sounding stuff from an opera?

[goldfishgoddess]

I don't think we know nearly enough about Marjorie to say with such certainty that she was only with Josiah because she wanted to be famous. We know next to nothing about her and have absolutely no idea why she got into the courtship and why she got out of it.

The courtships were used to drive plots for the show. No show, no need for Marjorie. And maybe Boob's doing the math, their wedding would just cost him and not bring in any money.

[bBvideo 560,340:300lmrjj]

[/bBvideo]

:ew: :ew: :ew: :ew: :ew: :ew: :ew: :ew:

[DeFrauder]

It was a thing in Regency England. I've heard the rumour that Gothardites follow this rule as well, but have never seen anyone in the know actually come out and say they do. I somehow can't imagine they actually follow this rule, just because of the implications. What happens if you start courting a girl and then you find out she has no problem with dancing or drinking wine? Or she changes her mind about something crucial in the middle of the courtship, like birth control or wifely submission or whatever - but still insists the marriage go forward? I can't see them still saying, "Nope, only the girl can break it off!"

I am pretty sure they know what type of person the potential courting partner is before they start courting. Their parents select mates from a very small pool of people and defraudful dancing queens will not make the cut.

Courting just used to be another word for dating--or rather dating is a modern word for courting. I don't get how the Gothard crew has managed to convince people that it is something different.

Remember Laura Ingalls Wilder? Almanzo Wilder "courted" her. That more or less meant that Almanzo could take Laura out on dates and Pa wasn't going to beat the crap out of him for it. If anyone read the books they will remember that Almanzo would pick up Laura in his horse and buggy and they would go for a drive ALONE. After dating for a while Almanzo gave her a ring (I think it was a pearl) and asked her to marry him. She said yes so they were then engaged. Doesn't sound much different then what goes on today.

I do know that in Victorian England it was a very serious thing for a man to break off an engagement. The jilted would be bride had the right to a settlement. I think men would feel they had to be absolutely sure before they asked a woman to marry them because cold feet might mean financial ruin.

I think it is ridiculous that Duggar courting means that the couple are engaged and they haven't ever been alone together. They should call it what it is: an arranged marriage.

[DeFrauder]

I don't think they have any loud, angsty music to blast through the TTH.

When my son broke up with his first serious GF all his male friends came over and they played Band Hero (or whatever it was called ) for 3 days. It was murder on the rest of us.

[DeFrauder]

I think that WE know as much about Marjorie as Josiah did when they started "courting".