Josiah Duggar - Part 3 Now with lost heart pieces

[HereticHick]

I feel sorry for them both, but I'd rather have this end sooner than later.

I am eternally grateful that my teenage breakups were not broadcast to the entire world.

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

Welp. It's officially over.

http://www.people.com/article/josiah-du ... ie-jackson

Thanks to nst for showing me the link.

I have mixed feelings about this. Mostly, I feel awful because I think a lot of why this didn't go through is because of what Josh did and what his parents tried to hide. I'm not going to sit here and say that the Jacksons had no idea. I am sure they knew (since it seems to be common knowledge in the area), but because of how everything was handled with the press and how people in general are reacting to the Duggars. I'm sure their age probably also didn't help, but it's so rare for a courtship to end based on silly little things like the emotional connection that the children have to each other on a lasting basis.

I am glad, though, that they wont be marrying so young.

I just hope that the other kids aren't continually punished for what their parents and brother did. Although, I have every reason to believe they will be, which is terrible.

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

Looks like we forced them to address it. If it's been over for a few weeks I wonder why they didn't announce sooner? Maybe now in a few years Josiah can go to a place like Sonic and meet a girl on his own. :) Does anyone here believe that the Duggars will now reevaluate courtship and loosen the rules a little like the Bates did? Doubt it!

It crossed my mind, but then I remembered how much they absolutely value purity and all that shit after 4 of their daughters were molested by their son... They don't give a crap about "preserving their children's hearts" or whatever.

[Rescinded and Mended]

Personally, if I were Marjorie's parents, I wouldn't want my child involved with the Duggars or their problems right now. Not at her youthful age, and I wouldn't want her to have the notoriety. But that isn't Josiah's fault, and for all we know, he could have wanted out, too.

I think it's best for everyone involved that this courtship is ended.

[MatthewDuggar]

Glad to hear it. I don't "feel sorry" that they broke up, it's life. I felt more sorry thinking they could have married so young and never got the opportunity to explore a bit and meet other people. My wish is that they each go off to college and learn not only a degree but more of life's lessons outside of the cultish world they live in.

[RabbitKM]

I am just stunned by the fundy logic regarding courtships.

I am of the understanding that courtships equal dating with a purpose, that purpose being marriage. This means that a courtship is essentially two people deciding whether or not they want to marry each other. How does this prevent you from giving away pieces of your heart???

If you are serious about finding out if you want to marry said person, wouldn't you give them pieces of your heart? And then, if things dont work out, as in Josiah's case, you are left with a very serious hole in your heart, so to speak.

But if you went into the relationship with a more casual mindset, like, "lets see if I like this person", or "lets just get to know one another better", if things dont work out, you aren't left with such a big hole. Basically, what I am saying is, wouldn't you be less heartbroken if you ended things with a casual partner than a partner you are hoping to marry?

[Bgirl]

Actually I suspect her family didn't know. They seem to be newer members of ATI and I believe the newbies didn't know about the rumor. I think they started to see the Duggars for who they are and didn't like the "shadiness."

[JenniferJuniper]

For all we know, Josiah is very relieved.

My bet is this was all orchestrated by Jim Bob, partly for ratings and partly because of whatever the reasons were that got Josiah sent off to Alert for most of 2014.

Marjorie seemed a very willing participant and clearly relished the spotlight, so she was a perfect fit for JIM BOB's needs. Whether Josiah really wanted to be married or not is a huge open question.

In the end, it was probably her parents who pulled the plug. Josiah has no financial prospects right now and the family is tainted by scandal. Scandal that involves his parents just as much as his brother.

Goodbye, Marjorie. We hardly knew ye.

[MatthewDuggar]

Actually I suspect her family didn't know. They seem to be newer members of ATI and I believe the newbies didn't know about the rumor. I think they started to see the Duggars for who they are and didn't like the "shadiness."

More like it was shoved in her face. I can't imagine how I'd really feel if my teenage daughter was suddenly in the spotlight for going out with a reality show co-star in which the show is under a major scandal due to molestation.....and now she's in the press because of it all. I strongly think they seriously encouraged her to end it fast.

[bella8050]

Been away from the board for awhile, just saw the article on People and I was so relieved!

I hope neither are too upset over this and certainly that it doesn't "taint" them in their world. But in the real world it seems like a good thing. I feel like this means Josiah was pushed by JB for the show to be the next storyline.

ETA: I wonder if Josiah will be allowed to keep his IG account now, or if it will at least be inactive until he's courting again.

[ShepherdontheRock]

Not a shock.

Hopefully it was really a mutual decision, and even if it wasn't, that nobody is hurt too badly.

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

Actually I suspect her family didn't know. They seem to be newer members of ATI and I believe the newbies didn't know about the rumor. I think they started to see the Duggars for who they are and didn't like the "shadiness."

They've been around the Duggars for years. The mom was shown teaching the Duggars Spanish. Michelle would not have entrusted her to do such a thing if she wasn't ATI. It's pretty much an ATI requirement to make sure that the children aren't taught things they shouldn't be. Plus, they've known the Duggars long enough and they've lived in the area long enough that they should have known about the abuse.

[NoJulius]

Mhhhh, maybe she can write the tell all story :dance:

(or at least a part of it...)

[nokidsmom]

First off, I highly suspect that it wasn't a mutual decision. Could be wrong, but my feeling is that Marjorie called it off because either scandal and / or show being cancelled. Feel bad for Josiah because no matter how it ended, mutual or not, he seemed happy about this courtship and he's probably going to wonder how much his family situation weighed into it regardless of all the "Lord's will" talk.

Really this should just be as if two people had dated and it didn't work out. But this courtship business blows it all of proportion putting pressure on both parties even without all the media glare, TV show, maintaining a brand, etc. Maybe Marjorie realized this, an early lesson in the price of fame.

Also Marjorie's parents. Marjorie is still a minor at 17 and while it's not known publicly how her parents felt about the molestations, I hope that that would be a serious, serious concern for them. No, Josiah did not commit them and yes, it's rather unfair for it to reflect on him, however, the handling of the issue by JB and J'chelle showed some messed family dynamics and that should have given any parent allowing a minor to court allegedly for purposes of marriage, cause for some worry over what they were allowing their child to get into.

Whatever the reasons, that girl dodged a bullet.

[DuggarsTheEndIsNear]

Been away from the board for awhile, just saw the article on People and I was so relieved!

I hope neither are too upset over this and certainly that it doesn't "taint" them in their world. But in the real world it seems like a good thing. I feel like this means Josiah was pushed by JB for the show to be the next storyline.

ETA: I wonder if Josiah will be allowed to keep his IG account now, or if it will at least be inactive until he's courting again.

It's hard to say. He never posted that much to begin with, and he has to wait until he can use a sibling's phone per JB's thing about "boys not having access to smartphones cause porn." But, his last post was 11 weeks ago.

[justmy2cents]

I wonder if Josiah will be allowed to keep his IG account now, or if it will at least be inactive until he's courting again.

I have a feeling we won't be hearing about any more courtships, they'll just announce engagements. I won't be surprised if that IG account will disappear soon.

[JenniferJuniper]

I have a feeling we won't be hearing about any more courtships, they'll just announce engagements. I won't be surprised if that IG account will disappear soon.

Josiah probably wasn't in charge of it anyway. He likely still has a FPOS (flip phone of shame).

[SassyPants]

As unfortunate as all these dominos falling might seem (Josh and JB exposed, the show being cancelled, J/D getting out of dodge, the broken courtship, the amped up grifting), all of these things needed to happen in order for any of those kids to have a chance at successfully living and thriving in the real world.

The last Decade for the Duggars was nothing but a facade and house of cards built on air.

They needed to be broken down, so that they can each be built up on a solid foundation that will last.

They were not living in the real world. Ponzi schemes rarely last for the long haul.

[16strong]

Sorry, but they never looked that into each other.

[FullmoonOverDuggardWaters]

Sin in the camp!

Josiah is young, and perhaps he finds his natural sex-drive hard to control.

Marjorie's latest blog quotes 2 Thessolonians 3:13;

"Never tire in doing what is right."

:shrug:

[silverspoons]

Did we ever find out how old the Marjorie's mom was? She looked so young. I always wondered if Marjorie didn't have some pressure as well to get married young.

I have a middle school aged daughter and many of the parents of her friends are 30-32, married living in stucco mini-mansions. There are so many 4-5 generation families , each generation married before 20. These moms fully expect their daughters to marry at 18-19.

I'm happy that the courtship is over. I just hope both kids are being supported emotionally and not put down for any failures or sins.

[Snarkylark]

I am just stunned by the fundy logic regarding courtships.

I am of the understanding that courtships equal dating with a purpose, that purpose being marriage. This means that a courtship is essentially two people deciding whether or not they want to marry each other. How does this prevent you from giving away pieces of your heart???

If you are serious about finding out if you want to marry said person, wouldn't you give them pieces of your heart? And then, if things dont work out, as in Josiah's case, you are left with a very serious hole in your heart, so to speak.

But if you went into the relationship with a more casual mindset, like, "lets see if I like this person", or "lets just get to know one another better", if things dont work out, you aren't left with such a big hole. Basically, what I am saying is, wouldn't you be less heartbroken if you ended things with a casual partner than a partner you are hoping to marry?

Exactly! It makes absolutely no sense. There's way more pressure in a courting relationship than a casual, friendly one. I just wonder if they may have just decided it was too soon and now with no real way for Josiah to support a family they called it off. Will be interesting to see if these two pick it up again in a few years.

[MarcyMM]

I have a feeling we won't be hearing about any more courtships, they'll just announce engagements. I won't be surprised if that IG account will disappear soon.

But Social Media is about all they have left now. Maybe we'll see some loosening there soon. Building on what SassyPants said above, another step into them being more exposed to the real world and possibly more baby steps into getting out.

[HarleyQuinn]

For all we know, Josiah is very relieved.

My bet is this was all orchestrated by Jim Bob, partly for ratings and partly because of whatever the reasons were that got Josiah sent off to Alert for most of 2014.

Marjorie seemed a very willing participant and clearly relished the spotlight, so she was a perfect fit for JIM BOB's needs. Whether Josiah really wanted to be married or not is a huge open question.

In the end, it was probably her parents who pulled the plug. Josiah has no financial prospects right now and the family is tainted by scandal. Scandal that involves his parents just as much as his brother.

Goodbye, Marjorie. We hardly knew ye.

This makes the most sense. Marjorie came off, in the bit we've seen of her as very thirsty for the spotlight. She probably fit Boob's needs well (except those jeans of course) I do think she pulled the plug, probably because no TV show and bad press from their scandal.

[nickelodeon]

I'm glad for them. A teenage relationship and breakup is a normal part of life for lots of people-- but one that Josiah's older sibs and so many other kids in their world will never get to have. I hope Siah and Marjorie are able to get a lot of strength, empathy and good memories from this experience, which they wouldn't have gotten by bumrushing into marriage.