Erika Shupe Miscarriage

[mango_fandango]

Yeah, I find that interesting. With pretty much every other family, nomatter how fundie, we can tell little things about their personalities. But with Erika's kids, we know nothing of them. Well, pretty much nothing. Karen likes to draw.

With most families, the posts on their blog and stuff will tell us a few personality traits for each kid, whether they have outright said (like on a birthday post, they might mention their personality and interests when writing about what the parents like about them), or just implied through bits of their every day life.

There is nothing about them, they might as well be cardboard cutouts of people that Erika carries around with her. Their room is so sterile, with no hint of personality either. There is nothing that tells us a single thing about every one of those kids, except for basic assumptions like that because fundies love gender roles, the girls probably love playing dolls and wearing dresses, and the boys love cars and pretending to be soldiers...and that they are all Christians.

We don't know which of them are outgoing, and which are shy. We don't know which ones prefer active play, and which prefer to sit and read. We don't know who struggles a lot in school, and who is always gets good grades. We don't know what they like, what they want to be when they grow up, what their favourite school subjects are, what toys they like to play with best. They are just empty spaces, and the kids could be replaced with any other kid in the world, and Erika's blog would be the same because all that they are thought of is the space they take up, the food they eat, and where all of their belongings live.

I can direct you to the Shupe Family Christmas Letter 2014... on the Facebook page, under albums, and then "The Shupe Family Christmas Season 2014". The letter has a paragraph about each kid (except Lacey and Lilly who are lumped together as one)... but it reveals nothing new. Karen enjoys cooking and baking, which is part of the "mommy in training" part of her life. Melanie likes drawing and reading. The boys all like playing with Transformers and LEGO etc. Anna Marie also enjoys baking. The twins "fully embraced the homeschooling model" (like they had any choice) and haven't grasped the unique twin concept yet and are each other's best friend etc (fair enough, they are only four, but it probably doesn't help that Erika herself talks about them together). There's nothing that interesting in there.

Re the bolded bit: That's particularly funny that Karen is like that when Erika mentions constantly that she is really organised and responsible BECAUSE she is a first born. Karen is a first born, and isn't like that.

[apandaaries]

So I just rewatched the announcement video. Did that take place at their home? The colors seem like it, but that's a LONG table.

I'm curious because the first time I stumbled upon Erika was on a mommy's board where they were discussing her square footage. Other mommies in small houses were disputing the 1,100 sq. footage based on their own homes; one even took pictures of her home to compare her house with Erika's. It'd be interesting if she were also exaggerating about house size.

[mango_fandango]

So I just rewatched the announcement video. Did that take place at their home? The colors seem like it, but that's a LONG table.

I'm curious because the first time I stumbled upon Erika was on a mommy's board where they were discussing her square footage. Other mommies in small houses were disputing the 1,100 sq. footage based on their own homes; one even took pictures of her home to compare her house with Erika's. It'd be interesting if she were also exaggerating about house size.

I think it's at Erika's parents' place in Anacortes. I recognise it because I've seen pictures of it before. The room is a lot lighter than Erika's dining room because of the huge window.

[16strong]

I can direct you to the Shupe Family Christmas Letter 2014... on the Facebook page, under albums, and then "The Shupe Family Christmas Season 2014". The letter has a paragraph about each kid (except Lacey and Lilly who are lumped together as one)... but it reveals nothing new. Karen enjoys cooking and baking, which is part of the "mommy in training" part of her life. Melanie likes drawing and reading. The boys all like playing with Transformers and LEGO etc. Anna Marie also enjoys baking. The twins "fully embraced the homeschooling model" (like they had any choice) and haven't grasped the unique twin concept yet and are each other's best friend etc (fair enough, they are only four, but it probably doesn't help that Erika herself talks about them together). There's nothing that interesting in there.

Re the bolded bit: That's particularly funny that Karen is like that when Erika mentions constantly that she is really organised and responsible BECAUSE she is a first born. Karen is a first born, and isn't like that.

It is funny. I'd have to go back to the blog and look it up, but she mentioned once about finding a special watch of some sort to keep her oldest on time. It was definitely about Karen, and it stood out to me because it was the first thing I'd ever read on her blog that suggested a personality trait for one of her kids.

[mango_fandango]

It is funny. I'd have to go back to the blog and look it up, but she mentioned once about finding a special watch of some sort to keep her oldest on time. It was definitely about Karen, and it stood out to me because it was the first thing I'd ever read on her blog that suggested a personality trait for one of her kids.

It was on her Facebook page, I think... facebook.com/LargeFamiliesOnPurpose/photos/pb.171658456210597.-2207520000.1431810686./400653686644405/?type=3&theater

[Coco]

Yeah, I find that interesting. With pretty much every other family, nomatter how fundie, we can tell little things about their personalities. But with Erika's kids, we know nothing of them. Well, pretty much nothing. Karen likes to draw.

With most families, the posts on their blog and stuff will tell us a few personality traits for each kid, whether they have outright said (like on a birthday post, they might mention their personality and interests when writing about what the parents like about them), or just implied through bits of their every day life.

There is nothing about them, they might as well be cardboard cutouts of people that Erika carries around with her. Their room is so sterile, with no hint of personality either. There is nothing that tells us a single thing about every one of those kids, except for basic assumptions like that because fundies love gender roles, the girls probably love playing dolls and wearing dresses, and the boys love cars and pretending to be soldiers...and that they are all Christians.

We don't know which of them are outgoing, and which are shy. We don't know which ones prefer active play, and which prefer to sit and read. We don't know who struggles a lot in school, and who is always gets good grades. We don't know what they like, what they want to be when they grow up, what their favourite school subjects are, what toys they like to play with best. They are just empty spaces, and the kids could be replaced with any other kid in the world, and Erika's blog would be the same because all that they are thought of is the space they take up, the food they eat, and where all of their belongings live.

Re bolded: That is a little bit hyperbole but i'm guessing pretty close to the truth. My mom was a lot like Erika. All of us kids had a small rubbermaid container (not the big tubs - those ones that are probably 2ftx1ftx10in or so) for any personal belongings, collections, toys, etc. we wanted to keep beyond shared family things and clothes that were in one closet. At that time we lived in a two bedroom house, six kids.

We all want to recommend that Karen leave when she's 18 -- but it won't happen. She's got stockholm syndrome and loves her siblings too much to grieve them or her parents. If she gets out it will be gradually over many years or by marrying (hopefully a good person) and also over many years.

[Coco]

I remember the first time I read an explanation for skirts only modesty was on her blog.

Something along the lines of 'pants direct the eye to the crotch and thus the poor helpless men are left unable to carry out their normal activities without being attacked by women crotches highlighted by the tight line of sinful jeans along their thighs'

The entire post basically said it's your fault, men can't control themselves anyway. To her credit, she attempted to disguise her disgusting misogyny by claiming the opposite.

If it was the men who were truly blamed, women wouldn't be forced to wear skirts, men would wear eye patches. I love how fundies try to twist their obviously misogynistic spiel into acceptable sounding words. It involves a lot of 'called upon by the Lord' 'biblically adhering to the bible' 'glorifying Jesus in our actions' and other vague nonsense.

:clap: :clap: :clap:

Plus the fact that the more rules exist the more fragile the men's tolerance becomes. Clothing that is mainstream, average and normal is less noticed. Just wearing the basic thing everyone does makes it a non-issue. But fundies make it an issue. :angry-banghead:

Nothing makes a girl feel worse than being under modesty scrutiny from the men in the church. Giving the guys permission to keep on the lookout and "discern" if things are too tight or too short because they can keep the womenfolk "accountable" just means that they're focusing on what they're trying to protect themselves from. It's a dumb, vicious cycle.

[16strong]

I remember the first time I read an explanation for skirts only modesty was on her blog.

Something along the lines of 'pants direct the eye to the crotch and thus the poor helpless men are left unable to carry out their normal activities without being attacked by women crotches highlighted by the tight line of sinful jeans along their thighs'

The entire post basically said it's your fault, men can't control themselves anyway. To her credit, she attempted to disguise her disgusting misogyny by claiming the opposite.

If it was the men who were truly blamed, women wouldn't be forced to wear skirts, men would wear eye patches. I love how fundies try to twist their obviously misogynistic spiel into acceptable sounding words. It involves a lot of 'called upon by the Lord' 'biblically adhering to the bible' 'glorifying Jesus in our actions' and other vague nonsense.

It's worse than that, though. She mentioned that they had avoided going skirts-only for years, even though all of their friends were doing it, because they couldn't find anything in the bible to support skirts-only. However, they ended up doing it because Erika was too lazy to find the girls pants that weren't too tight. No really. :?

[momof2treasures]

I'll bet Karen is fairly punctual and organized, at least more than most teens. However it would be hard to measure up to a life scheduled in 15 minute increments. It probably doesn't feel too pressing to be on time for things like setting up play yards and bible time.

[mango_fandango]

It's worse than that, though. She mentioned that they had avoided going skirts-only for years, even though all of their friends were doing it, because they couldn't find anything in the bible to support skirts-only. However, they ended up doing it because Erika was too lazy to find the girls pants that weren't too tight. No really. :?

Didn't she also mention some book? Having checked the blog it was "Dressing with Dignity" by a woman called Colleen Hammond.

[DaffyDill]

Interesting. Erika writes almost nothing on her blog that tells her readers about her kids' personalities. Over the time that I have been reading her blog, I have only gleaned these few tidbits: That Karen is not particularly organized or good at being on time, that Melanie seems to be better/more interested in kids than Karen, and that the oldest boy seems to get lumped in with the younger kids a lot and doesn't really appreciate having to always do activities that are for kids much younger than him. He kind of seems left out without any boys his age to talk to. I agree. Everything is likely not all rainbows in that house.

Even Zsu has a picture of each child on the side of her blog and a little paragraph describing their personalities and what they like to do.

Erica's kids don't have personalities - they exist merely as a number and a resource to be used however Erica sees fit to promote whatever agenda she is flogging at a particular time. They're a group of 10 so she can brag about her family size, or they are a collective group for her to schedule and organise. They're lucky she bothered to even name them, she could well have just called them First, Second, Third etc.

[Eternalbluepearl]

I was just reading Erika's facebook page. Apparently the Lord blessed them with a chair at the Goodwill. Erika had been hoping for just right chair for her computer desk, preferably one that matched her other furniture. Lo and behold, the Lord delivered. Isn't that special? :roll: She's hoping others "catch a vision" for thrift shopping. :wtf:

[princessmahina]

I feel like we get a little more about the kids from her Large Families on Purpose facebook page. From that, I've gleaned that Karen is pretty talented at doing beauty related things- multicolored nails for 7/4, face painting, and the "wacky hair days" Erika allows them to do, for example. The only thing I really learned about Melanie is that she's a good artist.

The other kids? Might as well be furniture for all the information she gives out. She likes to put up pictures of the twins, but doesn't give anything about their personalities, how they differ, etc- probably because she doesn't notice.

[guitar_villain]

I was just reading Erika's facebook page. Apparently the Lord blessed them with a chair at the Goodwill. Erika had been hoping for just right chair for her computer desk, preferably one that matched her other furniture. Lo and behold, the Lord delivered. Isn't that special? :roll: She's hoping others "catch a vision" for thrift shopping. :wtf:

A couple of million kids are going to go to bed hungry tonight, but God made sure to check in with Erica and handle her office chair needs.

[mango_fandango]

A couple of million kids are going to go to bed hungry tonight, but God made sure to check in with Erica and handle her office chair needs.

It's like when God supposedly prompted Erika's friend to give her the Trim Healthy Mama book. :roll: I can totally understand thrift shopping, but the way Erika writes about it... :roll:

[mango_fandango]

facebook.com/LargeFamiliesOnPurpose/photos/a.209805625729213.48767.171658456210597/903230449720057/?type=1&theater

You guys... Bob and Erika made a podcast about squashing 11 people into their tiny house. Look at those weird photos... it's like they're all chocolate lollipops. Everyone's got their own noticeably separate "stick", but even here Lacey and Lilly have to be coming from the same point... always lumped together as one person...

Anyone brave enough to listen? Or is that too much to ask? *wink* *shudder*

[Seven Severn]

I thought there'd been some discussion about the size of Erika's house -- either in this thread or elsewhere, but I couldn't find it. She has stated that it's 1100 sq ft, but some people (on Facebook?) had questioned the size and thought it was larger. It took about 20 seconds of searching to find out that it's actually smaller: it's 1028 sq ft. (or 95.5 sq. meters) of living space. The info comes from the county property site. The apt. I share with the spouse is 2 bed/2 bath and 1200 sq ft. and I can't imagine portioning this place out into all those tiny rooms and cramming 12 people in; it just wouldn't be possible. We don't have a dining area and we don't have square footage taken up by staircases like Erika has. Our living room and kitchen look to be about the same size as hers (just positioned differently). Our master bedroom is 14x15 which is good sized, and our two bathrooms are a little larger than hers, but only a little. Their school room/play room looks to be about the size of our second bedroom. How the hell can there be two more bedrooms, another bathroom, and laundry area?? I just can't wrap my brain around how their house works like it does.

[divadivine]

I thought there'd been some discussion about the size of Erika's house -- either in this thread or elsewhere, but I couldn't find it. She has stated that it's 1100 sq ft, but some people (on Facebook?) had questioned the size and thought it was larger. It took about 20 seconds of searching to find out that it's actually smaller: it's 1028 sq ft. (or 95.5 sq. meters) of living space. The info comes from the county property site. The apt. I share with the spouse is 2 bed/2 bath and 1200 sq ft. and I can't imagine portioning this place out into all those tiny rooms and cramming 12 people in; it just wouldn't be possible. We don't have a dining area and we don't have square footage taken up by staircases like Erika has. Our living room and kitchen look to be about the same size as hers (just positioned differently). Our master bedroom is 14x15 which is good sized, and our two bathrooms are a little larger than hers, but only a little. Their school room/play room looks to be about the size of our second bedroom. How the hell can there be two more bedrooms, another bathroom, and laundry area?? I just can't wrap my brain around how their house works like it does.

You've got to be kidding me!?!?!? My apartment is 1,000 sq ft. and I live alone. I have a den (could be a bedroom if you put a door on the room b/c it has a closet) & a bedroom along with the kitchen (super tiny 1986 ugly), dining room, living room and 1 1/2 baths. There are times when I think my bedroom is too small. Of course the kitchen is too tiny & the layout sucks. I couldn't imagine having 11 people in this space. She has those poor kids caged like animals.

[Bambina]

Is the basement counted in square footage?

[Cartmann99]

Is the basement counted in square footage?

In looking at the layouts she has posted of her home, I don't think so. I could be wrong, but to my eyes, I can't see how both floors only add up to 1028 square feet.

www.largefamiliesonpurpose.com/2011/04/large-families-on-purpose-our-home.html

[NotALoserLikeYou]

I don't think that sq footage is possible. My house is 1020 sq feet. 3 bedrooms, 1 bathroom. No walk in closets or indoor laundry. Just a living room and no family room. No formal dining room. I think that second level isn't counting toward her footage.

[16strong]

It was on her Facebook page, I think... facebook.com/LargeFamiliesOnPurpose/photos/pb.171658456210597.-2207520000.1431810686./400653686644405/?type=3&theater

I think she also mentioned it on her blog, but yes! You found it. Great sleuthing. :)

[Melissa1977]

OH MY GOD I'm watching her pictures and the 12 years-old boy is the same height that her 9 years-old sister! Is this boy sick? maybe a hormonal or celiac disease?

About the children ages, I think Erica wasn't quiverful at the beginning. The elder girls are only 1 year apart, but next child is 3 years apart, then another 3 years gap. But then, she started having children every year.

[Queen Of Hearts]

FYI, Erica and Bob did a podcast with A Happy Home media, regarding decluttering and living in a small home. I am listening now so I am not ready to snark... yet. Except to say her voice sounds just like Kate Gosslin. *shudder*

ahappyhomemedia.com/?powerpress_pinw=2994-podcast

I do think, despite her being cray cray, Erica is a skilled organizer. As for the size of their home, I don't think she is underestimating it. Bob likes to think he is a photographer and most of the pictures of their home were taken by him with a wide angled lens, making the rooms look bigger than they are. In a recent post she gave the dimensions of her dining room and kitchen and it is small. For her house to be 1100 square feet the upstairs would be roughly 700 square feet and the downstairs about 350... not unrealistic based on what I am seeing in the pictures. I assume the garage area doesn't count.

[slickcat79]

Is the basement counted in square footage?

For sure the garage/storage space is not included, but I don't see an obvious reason why the rest of the downstairs wouldn't be. It seems to have adequate ceiling height and space above grade, but maybe there's some kind of code that's not being met.

Based on the county assessor's website, my apt is 675 sq ft. I moved from a 400 sq ft studio, so it seems plenty spacious, but it's just me and the feline headship. I don't think there's any possible way her upstairs could be close to that square footage. All the rooms that I have are smaller than her rooms, and I have no dining area, staircases, second bathroom, or closets beyond a small walk-in for the bedroom.

It's possible, though, that the downstairs is even smaller than it looks. Those bedrooms are tiny, and I don't think the 2 floors of her "floor plan" are drawn to the same scale.