Shades of Malibu Blue: Alyssa Bates & John Webster Wedding

[nausicaa]

I'm kind of glad to see John not play can you top this? Maybe since it is air conditioning season he doesn't think he can take too long off work. I'm looking at it that possibly he's more mature and has more worldly experience than the other two. I know, I'm ever hopeful.

That's good point about the air-conditioning business. Now that I think about it, I'm also hoping it's a sign of John and Alyssa's maturity and ability to not play "top this" in the fundie world.

[nausicaa]

But would the different couples really be planning their weddings and honeymoons based on what their siblings/ in- laws did?

I could see that if they are being traditional the Bates brides would reasonably expect to have about the same budget for a wedding from their Parents......but other than that it would seem, to me, that it would come down to their own tastes and spending priorities. Like one couple might want to blow a ton on their honeymoon but another might just want to spend the time camping, or whatever.

I don't have a Bates size family, but fairly large, and I've never noticed people basing any of those choices on what their siblings or cousins did. Except for maybe getting ideas of what they might like.

I find that families often create certain wedding traditions that become the norm whether people adhere to them or not. With Erin and Zach both going on extravagant honeymoons, I thought that would become a bit of a tradition in the Bates family, and something everyone would come to expect (just like their intricate engagement and courting ceremonies).

[silverspoons]

If it is a once in a lifetime honeymoon I can see going overseas. I could have gone anywhere on my first honeymoon, a family friend offer to pay as a wedding gift. My husband and I were in the middle of grad school and stressed so I actually choose one of those resorts outside the Poconos. We only had to travel 4-5 hours and stayed in a beautiful home, and everything was free & included, golf, boating, ice skating, meals, I'm not an outdoors type and I tried fishing and archery. I was a relaxing 10 days. After grad school we were able to travel to Europe so Im glad I choose a relaxing stress free honeymoon. Lake Tahoe in the summer from when I have been has offered the same type of off season activities and I know its been 5+ years but had some great summer rates. Plus they could rent a car and drive to other locations in California for 1-2 trips.

I'm sure John asked Kelly for suggestions. Maybe he had some sort of time share trade? I'm sure John just did not pick this out of the blue given all the prep and warning Alyssa and Erin had for courting and engagement pictures.

[Jessica]

http://instagram.com/p/ohsu4uuIqA/ Now I'm just being nit-picky, but.... I really don't like that style of photography where everything looks washed out and there's a big sun glare over half the picture. You can hardly even see John's face! IMO if you're going to charge someone thousands of dollars for wedding photography, don't let your pictures turn out like the kind my parents would have thrown away back when I was little.

Getting off my soap box.

<--- Not a professional photographer, just opinionated.

[thekate]

Tahoe is beautiful!

But jeez, Alyssa, enough with all the "selfies"!

Haha, who else is going to take pictures of them? No more chaperones! :D

I know you can't really tell here because it's their shadows, but I think Alyssa's skirt might be above the knee!

http://instagram.com/p/ohlTLeJAhk/

[twinmama]

And the verdict is.... Lake Tahoe!

Nice! I honeymooned in Lake Tahoe and it was wonderful! So relaxing and fun and not as expensive as some places (or it wouldn't have been expensive if we hadn't had sooo many wonderful expensive meals :) )

[EmmieJ]

Being from the south (Hampton Roads area of VA), we would NEVER serve a guest on paper plates. NEVER! Even family gets at least the daily dishes. Also, it's sort of expected that all the girls will gather in the kitchen to wash dishes, put stuff away and gossip while the men do whatever the men do while we're cleaning up. For special occasions, I bust out my mom's china. For REALLY special occasions I bust out my grandmother's china, the lead crystal glasses and good silverware. The Duggars are just lazy as hell and beyond tacky. We'd call them white trailer park trash where I'm from (not saying that living in a trailer park makes you trashy, but there are trashy trailer parks). Oblivious mama, horny dad, bunch of unruly kids running wild without any hometraining...yup...they fit.

Flip-Flops...when I lived in VA I wore them about 6 months out of the year. Here in Arizona, I wear them about 10 months out of the year. If I'm not wearing flip flops, I'm wearing sandals. The pedicures are costing me a fortune!!!!

Maybe when Michelle was growing up, her own family didn't make guests feel special/use nice dinnerware for guests or special occasions? Or maybe she was just too young when she got married that she hadn't absorbed some of that social etiquette. But most people, from the south, north, east or west, do like to make guests feel special and welcome. I have two sets of china, but my favorite is a very old Noritake pattern that belonged to my paternal grandmother. It's very fragile, but if we have company to dinner, that's the china we use. I don't have fancy silverware though - so we just use my everyday stuff.

Flip flops. I have a pair of Airtrex flip flops that I wear during the spring and summer months. Buy a new pair once a year. I have problem feet, and this brand is one of the few that I can wear for several hours without discomfort. Sorry to say, that's as dressy as I get anymore, because I haven't found any dressier shoes that I can stand to have on my feet for more than 10 minutes.

I thought the wedding dress was lovely, and the young couple seem very happy. I don't like what the Bates stand for, but their children seem happier than most other fundie families I've seen/heard of.

[Escapefromfundiedom]

Nice! I honeymooned in Lake Tahoe and it was wonderful! So relaxing and fun and not as expensive as some places (or it wouldn't have been expensive if we hadn't had sooo many wonderful expensive meals :) )

I did too! We loved it. It was low-key and we had a nice place to stay and there was enough to do that we weren't bored, but not so much that we felt like we were missing out (or wasting money on a fancy trip) on the days that we decided to stay in bed all day.

[gustava]

I did too! We loved it. It was low-key and we had a nice place to stay and there was enough to do that we weren't bored, but not so much that we felt like we were missing out (or wasting money on a fancy trip) on the days that we decided to stay in bed all day.

You're either lazy or slutty....off to the prayer closet :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

[Escapefromfundiedom]

You're either lazy or slutty....off to the prayer closet :mrgreen: :mrgreen:

Lol! Proud combo of both apparently.

[Tangy Bee]

Googled this honeymoon spot. Never been there. Looks like a place for people who enjoy the outdoors. Great scenery. Is it a great place to spend 2 weeks...I don't know? John is just trying to save up for a house if he hasn't already.

So are the Websters a more mainstream type of ATI? I think John's dad is a fart for wanting to make "covenant marriage" something everyone should be made to do. He probably wants ALL the kids in FL to be home schooled by ATI standards.

[Alachantal]

Holy shit was that ever an ugly wedding. I mean when I heard about the colours I knew it would be bad, but I didn't think ti would be that bad! It's like a colour overload and now I have a major headache from looking at all those photos! But she looked stunning! Beautiful dress for sure.

I googled Lake Tahoe - and man, now I want to go there! Lucky girl! I really did picture her going somewhere in Europe as well, but that definitely looks like a beautiful spot of a honeymoon. As long as the pair of them are happy what does it matter?

[Peas n carrots]

I know my DH and I would love Tahoe! We would have plenty to do there hiking, kayaking, etc. I guess it just all depends what you are into?

DH and I are definitely not into Disney, but my I know lots of adults who LOVE the Magic Kingdom. It's all good...variety is the spice of life!

[DGayle]

I don't think anyone gives a shit that they like to hold hands a lot (since they're "allowed" to now that they're engaged), it's that they're ALWAYS holding hands. There was a picture of them a few weeks ago at some BBQ thing for a fire department, Jill and Derick were at a long table, plates of food in front of them...and they were both eating with one hand because their other hands were firmly collapsed together. There are situations where letting go is the better idea and I don't think either one of them is going to run off if the other lets go for five seconds. Hold hands while sitting and watching the ceremony, great! But let go for a few seconds to stand up. Just the way your body would be positioned while standing would make it awkward to be holding on to someone's hand, I would think.

At least Jill and Derick's hand sex isn't as gross as Josh and Anna's was. But then again, we've mostly only seen it in still photos. Who knows what kind of rubbing and tugging is going on in motion :ew:

Hand sex also isn't very modest. It seems like a contradiction.

I really don't know why it is. It truly grosses me out to look at. Like really bad. Which is weird because I do like sex education stuff and sex positive stuff and I see porn all the time and I am usually the go-to when my friends are having sex issues but something about the goddamn hand sex just makes me uncomfortable. I guess that they're doing it so intimately and almost sensually (sometimes) but just right out in public cause it is just hands. Drives me nuts. Blech.

What gets to me about the hand-sex is it looks an awful lot like they're trying to get every drop of affection that they were ever deprived. They had to deny any romantic feelings they had for anyone and force themselves to keep it brotherly/sisterly. So when they can finally show anything, what we get is a situation where hand-holding is so intimate that it's like watching people have sex crossed with watching a couple kids try to get what they were deprived of. It's unsettling. We aren't seeing mere handholding. We're seeing silent therapy.

[DGayle]

That suit! Egads, it doesn't even look like the pants and the jacket are made out of the same material. Please tell me that's a trick of the filter that was used... :pink-shock:

It is. I did a double-take since one pic looked like jeans! But the a closer pic shows how it's the exact same fabric.

[DGayle]

That cake...belongs on Cakewrecks. The different shades, the crazy textures, the ribbons, the silver cake topper, the tulle flowers...Oh dear, I do hope it tastes better than it looks. Again...I think the theme of this wedding is 'More is More.'

Cakewrecks is only "professional" cakes sold to the public. That one's homemade. I bought some of that exact same pink trim at JoAnn's today, and was looking for something silver like that blue, but did find that blue. Hobby Lobby probably carries the same brand of trims.

[DGayle]

The thing on the cake -- like if it has to be homemade, fine. Budgets happen. But this is a culture that loves to praise all the homemaking skills they have. I should think some of those skills include proper cake making and icing smoothing. It would have been easier and cuter to smooth the buttercream on a turn table (or MacGuyver a lazy susan!) and then do some basic piping. (All stuff you could learn at a Wiltons course!)

Simple, cute. But that isn't the wedding theme, I suppose.

Ding. Ding. This is why I'm cutting no slack on the homemade cake. Those girls are supposed to be domestic goddesses. It's not like they're usually allowed any activities outside of practicing homemaking. When I was a small girl, I remember homemade cakes that put a lot of today's pro cakes to shame. Our mothers used to practice that stuff. Being able to make one of those princess doll cakes was the amazingest of amazing. So why are those girls and women, who are only supposed to practice homemaking skills, unable to make a cake that doesn't look like a first-try?

[LurkerOverThePond]

I would love Lake Tahoe and hiking, canoeing, scenery etc. Disney World would be my personal Hell. Maybe this is exactly what Alyssa wanted. At least she looked genuinely thrilled in the Instagram pics from Lake Tahoe.

Does anyone know how expensive the housing in general is in Florida? Are they going to live in a small town or in a major city? Maybe John needs every cent for their future home and chose a domestic resort for that reason, too.

[Formosa]

I would love Lake Tahoe and hiking, canoeing, scenery etc. Disney World would be my personal Hell. Maybe this is exactly what Alyssa wanted. At least she looked genuinely thrilled in the Instagram pics from Lake Tahoe.

Does anyone know how expensive the housing in general is in Florida? Are they going to live in a small town or in a major city? Maybe John needs every cent for their future home and chose a domestic resort for that reason, too.

They are going to live in Clermont, Florida and Alyssa didn't know where they were going, she wanted to be surprised.

It would NOT have made sense to go to Disneyworld for their honeymoon, they are going to live very close to Orlando! They can always go if they want to. It might also not be something special enough (for a honeymoon) to John, as he has been there multiple times (living in Florida, and I have seen pictures). That's probably also the reason they didn't go somewhere tropical or to a beach. They are going to live in Florida!

It's kinda like this: Paris is a great honeymoon location, but not if you are from Paris or are going to move there!

[Geechee Girl]

I would love Lake Tahoe and hiking, canoeing, scenery etc. Disney World would be my personal Hell. Maybe this is exactly what Alyssa wanted. At least she looked genuinely thrilled in the Instagram pics from Lake Tahoe.

Does anyone know how expensive the housing in general is in Florida? Are they going to live in a small town or in a major city? Maybe John needs every cent for their future home and chose a domestic resort for that reason, too.

Housing in central FL is very affordable to anyone with a steady income. A decent 3bed/2bath home came be found under 150K outside the Orlando metro. Clermont is still pretty rural with acreage and orange groves, although is has been growing steadily for the last decade. Many service/resort industry workers live 15-30min from Disney in Clermont, Winter Garden, Kissimmee, and Davenport for the low-cost housing.

[BirthingGodsWarriors]

I live in CA and have a friend who has a vacation house right on the Lake in Tahoe. During the ski season it is amazingly beautiful, there are shuttles that take you to and from the slopes, and you can experience all of the winter wonderland fun (ice skating, skiing, sledding, snowball fights, flirting and drinking hot chocolate at the lodges etc.) I've only camped in Tahoe during this time of year so my experience was hiking, rafting, etc. There is an awesome treetop park as well as a ton of history on the Donner Party (museums, historic sites etc.) although thats pretty morbid for a honeymoon lol. Oh and Truckee is an absolutely cute picturesque little town.

[mockingbird]

I mean if you think about it... has Alyssa really ever been on vacation before? (The Duggar girls at least get some vacations funded by the TV show.) If she's never been out of the South, Lake Tahoe has to be really different and interesting to her - probably just as or almost as much as Europe would be. I know I grew up close to Canada, and my family went there at least every other year, so it's not a big deal for me, but to a lot of my friends who are from other areas of the country, some of them haven't even left the US so it would seem really exciting for them to go to Canada.

It also sounds like a fun for people who are into outdoorsy stuff.

[nausicaa]

I mean if you think about it... has Alyssa really ever been on vacation before? (The Duggar girls at least get some vacations funded by the TV show.) If she's never been out of the South, Lake Tahoe has to be really different and interesting to her - probably just as or almost as much as Europe would be. I know I grew up close to Canada, and my family went there at least every other year, so it's not a big deal for me, but to a lot of my friends who are from other areas of the country, some of them haven't even left the US so it would seem really exciting for them to go to Canada.

It also sounds like a fun for people who are into outdoorsy stuff.

They've been to Silver Dollar City, and of course she's been to Florida. I know she and some of her sisters went somewhere in Central America on an ATI mission trip. For the life of me I cannot remember which country though.

I imagine Lake Tahoe is really exciting for her and very different than anything she has experienced (plus all this newfound independence!). I was actually originally surprised that Zach and Chad planned overseas honeymoons, because I thought most of the honeymooners would have been pretty excited about Myrtle Beach or the Poconos because it didn't seem that any of them came from very well-off families or had traveled very much.

[Mama Mia]

I assume they don't gamble, and they don't drink, but in addition to all the natural beauty and outdoorsy activities there is also a large number of casinos on the Nevada side of Tahoe, and most big casinos have shows to see and restaurants. It's a great place if you're looking for variety. Although I think most young couples spend most of their honeymoon occupied with each other more than outside activities :)

[Evilbad]

It doesn't matter what we think, if this is what they chose for their honeymoon (because yes the husband should get a say too) then more power to them. Tahoe is gorgeous any time of the year, and there's plenty to see and do right now too. It's hilarious because I'm sure everybody would pick apart wherever they went, but let's not forget that the other two couples were housed by church members for a good portion of their honeymoons, thus making it a lot cheaper. If they didn't have that option, Tahoe is lovely and pretty affordable this time of the year.