Jessa is Courting! All Things Duggar Family - Part 7

[nokidsmom]

I really don't follow the family but isn't Jessa known to be pretty bratty? I mean, at least as far as a Gothard/Pearl/Maxwell-raised child can be bratty?

Here's what I remember: When Jana was pretty young, she went to JB & M, complaining that a younger sister was being very mean to her. The Brain Trust's solution to that was to tell Jana that she had give her prized possession (a music box, IIRC) to the mean, younger sister to show that she (Jana) was forgiving .... or forgiven. These people fox things up SO badly. Jana was inconsolable but by going to her parents, she'd sealed her doom - she gave the box to the sister and asked forgiveness, or some such b.s.

Was that mean one Jessa? I really can't recall. TIA

PS: This is not to say I'm sad it's Jessa, getting out, and not Jana ... well, ok, it is, a little bit. I do join with others in hoping that a skydiving, free-thinking adolescent (she rejects her parents' beliefs that she is Jordyn's mother) can get an egalitarian marriage going with the young man. Perhaps their home would become a station on the underground railroad out of TTH.

Yes, I believe it was Jessa that Jana had to give her prized possession to. Maybe she will have her own mind about things and not quite pattern her life after her parents.

ETA: if she is indeed still the bratty type, maybe that's why she's been given a shot to get out of the TTH.

[LurkerOverThePond]

(she rejects her parents' beliefs that she is Jordyn's mother)

As much as I feel for Poor Lil Jordyn and agree that Jesse Blessa doesn't seem to be a very caring buddy, I still think she (Jessa) has every damn right not want to be a surrogate mom. These kids are her siblings - siblings who should be taken care of by their real parents, not by their older sisters. While I think Jessa definitely has a princessy vibe, too, she still has every right to live HER own life and wanting nice things happen to her. It's HER life after all. Still, I'm surprised her chosen one is a man child a la Taylor Tsantles.

About that next season preview video... Maybe I'm being hormonal or something but that scene of Jimbo wiping away Joshy's tears was kind of touching... Michelle's crying seemed totally fake, Anna's I'm not sure, but Josh's seemed genuine.

[nerdymama1]

Something seems off about that picture. I can't put my finger on it. I'm having a hard time seeing them together, even though they're both good looking. Something is just...wrong. Maybe it's just me being overly skeptical!

[thekate]

About that next season preview video... Maybe I'm being hormonal or something but that scene of Jimbo wiping away Joshy's tears was kind of touching... Michelle's crying seemed totally fake, Anna's I'm not sure, but Josh's seemed genuine.

He knows he's losing his weekly date nights and built-in babysitters.

[LurkerOverThePond]

He knows he's losing his weekly date nights and built-in babysitters.

Probably that, too :lol:

But, he is all momma's boy, after all. Her first born and favored kid.

[Hisey]

My husband is younger than I am, so I'm not trying to criticize this type of match, but Jessa is 21 and you'd think she'd go for an older man. You'd think she'd believe 18 was "a kid." After all, that makes this boy around Joseph/Josiah's age. Plus, she knows that --for the rest of her life--he's going to have to be her "spiritual leader" and that she will have to submit to him in everything. Jessa has seen more of the world than most fundies, thanks to TLC. You'd think that would make this boy seem even more like a callow youth (not saying he is).

There is something about the age gap, in this case, that makes it seem not quite right.

[FJismyheadship]

Something seems off about that picture. I can't put my finger on it. I'm having a hard time seeing them together, even though they're both good looking. Something is just...wrong. Maybe it's just me being overly skeptical!

The look I see on Jessa's face is that she would rather be anywhere else. She looks a bit like she is cringing to me.

[Kira]

Jessa may not seem to care for children, but since when it that a requirement for parents in fundieland.

[silverspoons]

Wouldn't a fan be just what the Duggars wanted? I'm sure he was not a stalker but more like his family watched the show and they met at some conference. If the family or Ben are fans of the show they would most likely think it was great to be filmed. Isn't that what JB wanted to marry a daughter off to a boy from AR who would be part off the show?

The picture someone posted pages back of his parents in the Duggar hallway dates back to June so they have been visiting a few months. I am feeling weird about the age. If she knew him when he was 17(very likely since his family was at the Duggar house a few weeks after he turned 18) and she was 20 something seems off. They better get the VSE because how successful can his windshield business be after just finishing homeschool a few months ago? As successful as Josh's car lot?

[LilMissMetaphor]

For fuck's sake can we stop analyzing people's smiles, eyes, hairlines, and choice of clothing to determine whether or not they're happy or secretly dead inside? It's irritating as all fuck.

[Dollypeeps]

Ok I have looked and looked for info and it's just what others have found and his FB is an open one won't be for long though no doubt. Aunts comment is still up too she also states they met through the show. God I hope there is more to it than that seriously I do cos that's creepy right there.

Now the thing is this why is it just one pic of them together and not a group of pics most young ones plaster pics all over the place more so when entering courtship, relationships, anything new in there lives well most do, also his parents are not on his FB but then they might not have FB.

I'm calling bullshit on it but will concede when the announcement is broadcasted of course.

[marmalade]

I don't think Boob would allow any non-related boy to touch one of his precious, virginal daughters unless they were at least "courting." if not engaged (can't see Jessa's hand, so I can't opine on that). Don't forget how he waded into the Red Sea fully clothed because some guy dared to strike up a conversation with said daughters.

[nokidsmom]

My husband is younger than I am, so I'm not trying to criticize this type of match, but Jessa is 21 and you'd think she'd go for an older man. You'd think she'd believe 18 was "a kid." After all, that makes this boy around Joseph/Josiah's age. Plus, she knows that --for the rest of her life--he's going to have to be her "spiritual leader" and that she will have to submit to him in everything. Jessa has seen more of the world than most fundies, thanks to TLC. You'd think that would make this boy seem even more like a callow youth (not saying he is).

There is something about the age gap, in this case, that makes it seem not quite right.

The age gap wouldn't be as big a deal if they were older. Sure the difference in years are always the same but the life stage/experience gap closes, so to speak, at older ages. At 18 and 21, there's a difference as so much can change in those few years. Plus the idea that she has to submit to this boy as her headship does strke me as not right either.

[gustava]

For fuck's sake can we stop analyzing people's smiles, eyes, hairlines, and choice of clothing to determine whether or not they're happy or secretly dead inside? It's irritating as all fuck.

While I agree with what you are saying, the word choice does seem a bit much. Maybe one F word would have been sufficient.

[anjulibai]

The age gap wouldn't be as big a deal if they were older. Sure the difference in years are always the same but the life stage/experience gap closes, so to speak, at older ages. At 18 and 21, there's a difference as so much can change in those few years. Plus the idea that she has to submit to this boy as her headship does strke me as not right either.

I agree. I am 4 years young than my husband, and we started dating when I was 22 and he was 26. In maturity and experience, it wasn't that big of a difference.

But when I was 19, I dated another guy that was 4 years older than me, so he was 23. That was a huge difference, and it showed in our relationship. I was definitely a lot less mature and experienced than he was.

If this is true I have a hard time seeing these two marrying quickly, because he just won't be ready.

That said, I think Michelle was about 20-21 when she had Josh, so this would certainly set Jessa up to have a +12 kids.

[Curious]

Actually I don't think it would be hard for TLC to traipse to DC. The Discovery Channel headquarters are in Silver Spring, Maryland, only a few blocks from DC.

Don't they use Figure 8 to film 19k, though? I thought they did since they have used some of the same crew as the Gosselin's had. Figure 8, is based in North Carolina.

[mrs]

Don't they use Figure 8 to film 19k, though? I thought they did since they have used some of the same crew as the Gosselin's had. Figure 8, is based in North Carolina.

Good point. I just assumed if they lived near DC TLC could send a crew to film. But, if Figure 8 is based out of NC maybe not...

Maybe Josh and Anna decided to make the move so they would not have to be filmed as much anymore. Plus if Jessa is in a courtship now they won't need to film Josh and Anna as much.

[mrs]

I agree. I am 4 years young than my husband, and we started dating when I was 22 and he was 26. In maturity and experience, it wasn't that big of a difference.

But when I was 19, I dated another guy that was 4 years older than me, so he was 23. That was a huge difference, and it showed in our relationship. I was definitely a lot less mature and experienced than he was.

If this is true I have a hard time seeing these two marrying quickly, because he just won't be ready.

That said, I think Michelle was about 20-21 when she had Josh, so this would certainly set Jessa up to have a +12 kids.

Maybe it is not as big of a difference as it would be if a non-fundie 23 woman was marrying a non-fundie 18 year old man.

I know others have posted in the past, the older Duggars may be emotional/maturity stunted. So perhaps Jessa has the maturity level of a 18. Or he could be a very mature 18.

[twinmama]

That guy is soo young. Jessa is too, but man, 18... he could be a father while he's 19 or 20! In normal world, that's not really something to be celebrated! However, I bet it's a lot less scary for Jessa to be facing the prospect of marrying an 18 year old guy who looks like a child than a 30 year old man. Like all the teenagers that loved sexually unthreatening Edward from Twilight or Beiber.

Regardless, I hope the show treats it less "I'm gonna get LAID SOON!" than they did Josh's wedding. Double standard I know, but given how these people treat a girl's virginity I'm scared to see any focus on that in the courtship/wedding stuff.

[sunshine]

Ok I have looked and looked for info and it's just what others have found and his FB is an open one won't be for long though no doubt. Aunts comment is still up too she also states they met through the show. God I hope there is more to it than that seriously I do cos that's creepy right there.

Now the thing is this why is it just one pic of them together and not a group of pics most young ones plaster pics all over the place more so when entering courtship, relationships, anything new in there lives well most do, also his parents are not on his FB but then they might not have FB.

I'm calling bullshit on it but will concede when the announcement is broadcasted of course.

I recall when Jimbob says that he has had many suitor send emails expressing interesting towards the girls. I guess Ben made the cut.

[Feberin]

My SIL is immature and sheltered so she tends to date guys who are a few years younger then her. I would assume that is the case here.

I think Jim Bob realizes that Jessa will not be controlled as easily as her older sisters. She isn't as beaten down as Jana or eager to please as Jill. Journeys to the Heart probably aren't doing much to help Jessa's interest in the outside world. By marrying her off Jim Bob is getting a chance to increase ratings with a daughter who will absolutely love being filmed in the process of her courtship, engagement and wedding. Additionally all the new and exciting things of this process will keep Jessa happy for awhile. And then if she becomes pregnant she will be stuck in the fundie world because of her children. I think Jessa wanted a boy that she could have some control over despite that not being how things typically are done in the fundie world. So she found a less religious boy who would actually give her some say in how they live their life. I don't think Jessa is dumb or easy to control. She is probably one of the most strong willed Duggars especially among the oldest ones. Jim Bob found success in keeping Josh fundie by marrying him off and I think is hoping for similar results with Jessa.

[freethemall]

Where'd the first thread where this conversation started go? Seemed like it was worthy of its own.

Anyway I'll repost what I put up the first time - I looked around and he has a Twitter if you search his name + Arkansas. Two very interesting tweets recently:

9/10: "When someone who means everything to you has a heavy burden to bear and you wish with all your heart you could step in and bear it for her."

8/20: "Been asked a lot of tough questions lately. so thankful tho! it's made me study more & find out why I believe what I believe." Maybe in re: the famous JimBob questionnaire?

I can't tell with this one - on the one hand he's very religious, but more modern than a normal fundie, even just with the fact that he has Facebook and Twitter. Maybe this is a more modern relationship?

[Handmaiden of Dog]

The look I see on Jessa's face is that she would rather be anywhere else. She looks a bit like she is cringing to me.

What I see is a young woman who looks slightly embarrassed or self-conscious-- probably because she has never been this close to another boy outside her family and probably because she knows what a huge deal this is. I'm sure when she posed for this picture she had to imagine this would explode like a bomb all over the internet.

The picture of his family, on the other hand, is really odd. It does look like a professionally staged portrait sitting on a padded sofa in a wood or park somewhere, but then they are being photobombed by a strange woman in the background. So either this is an outtake or else the photographer was an amateur. Maybe a fundie girl who does photography as a sideline? Did nobody notice the other girl? Did they not care?

In a way although I agree this guy seems a bit too young and the future doesn't look too bright for the pair of them, I'm hoping this is the moment that will bust up the log jam and set the other young Duggar adults free.

[Kira]

Where'd the first thread where this conversation started go? Seemed like it was worthy of its own.

Anyway I'll repost what I put up the first time - I looked around and he has a Twitter if you search his name + Arkansas. Two very interesting tweets recently:

9/10: "When someone who means everything to you has a heavy burden to bear and you wish with all your heart you could step in and bear it for her."

8/20: "Been asked a lot of tough questions lately. so thankful tho! it's made me study more & find out why I believe what I believe." Maybe in re: the famous JimBob questionnaire?

I can't tell with this one - on the one hand he's very religious, but more modern than a normal fundie, even just with the fact that he has Facebook and Twitter. Maybe this is a more modern relationship?

I don't mean to be pessimistic all the time, but many fundies have Facebook and Twitter.

[Kira]

My SIL is immature and sheltered so she tends to date guys who are a few years younger then her. I would assume that is the case here.

I think Jim Bob realizes that Jessa will not be controlled as easily as her older sisters. She isn't as beaten down as Jana or eager to please as Jill. Journeys to the Heart probably aren't doing much to help Jessa's interest in the outside world. By marrying her off Jim Bob is getting a chance to increase ratings with a daughter who will absolutely love being filmed in the process of her courtship, engagement and wedding. Additionally all the new and exciting things of this process will keep Jessa happy for awhile. And then if she becomes pregnant she will be stuck in the fundie world because of her children. I think Jessa wanted a boy that she could have some control over despite that not being how things typically are done in the fundie world. So she found a less religious boy who would actually give her some say in how they live their life. I don't think Jessa is dumb or easy to control. She is probably one of the most strong willed Duggars especially among the oldest ones. Jim Bob found success in keeping Josh fundie by marrying him off and I think is hoping for similar results with Jessa.

I really don't get all the "Jessa can't be controlled" and "Jessa found a boy she can control" comments. Also, I don't think his family is less religious than the Duggars. They just don't seem to follow some of the rules(modest clothing, for example) the Duggars follow.