Jill, Derick and Israel- Part 17

[Tiny Bubbles]

Derick's preaching on depression?  The NERVE of this guy!!  Who the heck does he think he is?  Grrrr.  

[ClaraOswin]

Can comments not be left on his blog? I don't see any. Not that it matters because I'm sure they wouldn't approve any REAL comments.

[choralcrusader8613]

5 minutes ago, ClaraOswin said:

Can comments not be left on his blog? I don't see any. Not that it matters because I'm sure they wouldn't approve any REAL comments.

I don't see a place for comments. Though frankly, after the (well-deserved) snark they got on IG and elsewhere, I can see why they wouldn't want "persecution from all sides" or whatever.

[lascuba]

12 hours ago, nastyhobbitses said:

The post also tells me that Derick probably wasn't the awesome supportive husband to Jill we all kept say he'd be when the molestation scandal came out. Based on this post, I wouldn't be surprised if his "support" for his wife was to tell her that it was probably her fault that her brother molested her and she should just slap a smile on and pray for forgiveness for feeling sad and getting sexually assaulted and feeling sad about being sexually assaulted.

Because my quest to demonstrate that Jill is The Absolute Worst is never ending...

Derrick  could be taking his cue from her. Jill is the one with the naturally sunny disposition, and while that doesn't mean she doesn't feel negative emotions, it's probably very easy for her to get over them. Which is great for Derrick, because while he might not be an insensitive husband, he doesn't really have to work very hard to be supportive. His wife gets upset, she tells herself it's something about her, and Jill being Jill, that totally works for her because she can fix things on her end. And both she and Derrick get to convince themselves that that's what everyone should do because it works for them.

 

Oh, and Derrick?

Quote

 The subject I want to discuss today is “depression”, but I am in no way claiming to give psychological, psychiatric, medical, or otherwise professional advice.  For professional help, I would encourage you to seek the help of a properly certified Christian counselor.

Go fuck yourself.

[RosyDaisy]

I am a Christian and suffer from depression and anxiety. Do you want to know what helps me? Medication and therapy. So, fuck you Derick!

[Four is Enough]

Quote

 properly certified Christian counselor.

What is that, exactly?

[SledCat]

I grew up in a fundie household, and my mother suffered with depression. She would not take anti-depressants or talk with a "secular" counselor, and went the "be joyful, and trust God" route, with the blessing of my dad. She was eventually okay, but I hope it doesn't sound selfish to say that her essentially untreated depression took a big toll on our family.

[twinmama]

On 7/1/2016 at 7:27 PM, MiddleAgedLady said:

Derick's latest tweet. 

 

Let's hope Derick's wife doesn't get postpartum psychosis and feel like her only option is to murder all of her children like Andrea Yates. That's the road thinking like this and the quiverful lifestyle leads you down. Derick needs to fuck right off now.

Also, odd how when his mom had cancer she sought real medical treatment, but an illness of the mind all you need is Jesus! Why isn't Jesus good enough to heal your bodies if he can heal your minds? 

[MakeItSo]

3 hours ago, SledCat said:

I grew up in a fundie household, and my mother suffered with depression. She would not take anti-depressants or talk with a "secular" counselor, and went the "be joyful, and trust God" route, with the blessing of my dad. She was eventually okay, but I hope it doesn't sound selfish to say that her essentially untreated depression took a big toll on our family.

it doesn't at all! One of my parents is bipolar (untreated) and it was one of a bunch of other reasons (but a big one) why I ended up getting adopted by my aunt and uncle in my early teens. Mental illnesses can take a HUGE toll on all family members and I'm not even allowing myself to respond to Derrick preaching on mental health because my choice of words would not be very....nice.

[nst]

Derick needs help and clearly he isn't getting it from Jill. 

Jill is all by herself cray cray 

these two probably riddle each other to death 

6 hours ago, lascuba said:

Because my quest to demonstrate that Jill is The Absolute Worst is never ending...

Derrick  could be taking his cue from her. Jill is the one with the naturally sunny disposition, and while that doesn't mean she doesn't feel negative emotions, it's probably very easy for her to get over them. Which is great for Derrick, because while he might not be an insensitive husband, he doesn't really have to work very hard to be supportive. His wife gets upset, she tells herself it's something about her, and Jill being Jill, that totally works for her because she can fix things on her end. And both she and Derrick get to convince themselves that that's what everyone should do because it works for them.

 

Oh, and Derrick?

Go fuck yourself.

i get the impression that all Derick does is think of these little diatribes on his days off - which happen to be five days per week 

[Jinder Roles]

6 hours ago, lascuba said:

 Jill is the one with the naturally sunny disposition, and while that doesn't mean she doesn't feel negative emotions, it's probably very easy for her to get over them.

 

I feel quite the contrary. I think Jill holds on to things and does passive-aggressive stuff. She always seems to be on a quest to prove she's the most godly/right (tattles on her siblings, excuses for whenever she doesn't do something right). She doesn't handle criticism well (which I get, she's been emotionally stunted and told to act a certain way) I don't think she really deals with her feelings. 

Jessa just avoids her issues. 

[snarkysuki1724]

1 hour ago, MakeItSo said:

it doesn't at all! One of my parents is bipolar (untreated) and it was one of a bunch of other reasons (but a big one) why I ended up getting adopted by my aunt and uncle in my early teens. Mental illnesses can take a HUGE toll on all family members and I'm not even allowing myself to respond to Derrick preaching on mental health because my choice of words would not be very....nice.

Agree 100%.  I grew up with a parent with untreated bipolar and I can say from my experience that it really had a terribly negative affect on the whole family, and still does. 

[MakeItSo]

2 hours ago, snarkysuki1724 said:

Agree 100%.  I grew up with a parent with untreated bipolar and I can say from my experience that it really had a terribly negative affect on the whole family, and still does. 

Sorry to read you're in a similar boat. (this is a hugging duo right? Right??...let's pretend it's a full on sinner frontal hug one...not a I dry hump you while you politely play along thing, k? cool).

 I have also learned from talking to friends who also have a parent with bipolar and borderline and other similar disorders that it can manifest quite differently in each individual (and it seems that many don't just have one clear cut diagnosis...please someone correct me if I'm wrong). While my friend's mom says/does some really irrational/strange (to others) things, it seems to come from a good benevolent place, then again she is being treated for it. My family has had to deal with a more malicious, manipulating variety (multiple differnt mental illness dx's came out over the years but proper after care treatment never happened) and a family can't be built on lies and threats. I'm simplifying a lot here and I am by no means an expert (I'm always interested in learning more because there is so much I don't understand but at the same time I have to admit, I'm not always ready to listen right away because there are just some things I haven't really worked through myself yet and so I'm merely looking in from the outside...even though as someone with mental illness in your family you do stand pretty close to the edge of the inside, it seems.

[lascuba]

10 hours ago, Jinder Roles said:

I feel quite the contrary. I think Jill holds on to things and does passive-aggressive stuff. She always seems to be on a quest to prove she's the most godly/right (tattles on her siblings, excuses for whenever she doesn't do something right). She doesn't handle criticism well (which I get, she's been emotionally stunted and told to act a certain way) I don't think she really deals with her feelings. 

Jessa just avoids her issues. 

That could be it as well, though I don't view that behavior as passive aggression so much as arrogant superiority. Jill has the perfect personality for Gothardism. She naturally enjoys the rigidly defined things she's allowed to do, and she truly, deep in her soul believes everything she's been taught, so when her siblings would act out of line she'd tattle, because 1)she needed to stop them from destroying their immortal souls, and 2) she just can't relate to their siblings breaking the rules. The rules are great! They make Jesus happy! It makes Jill happy and deeply satisfied to follow them! And if everyone just followed the rules they'd be as happy as she is! All of that is why, to me,  Derrick's post on depression had Jill's voice all over it.

You're right that she can't handle criticism at all. This is a girl who was the golden child of her family, the one who's parents had nothing even the tiniest bit negative to say about. She was even the perfect baby. And for a long time she was the one chosen to be the spokesperson for the older sisters on the show, and the internet tended to give her a pass because she was sweet, sunny Jill. And then she gets engaged and boom, people have all sorts of negative things to say about her and she has to experience in handling that. That must have done a number on her identity. 

[ClaraOswin]

16 hours ago, Four is Enough said:

What is that, exactly?

I wondered that as well. What would they be certified in, exactly? Some fake certification probably.

[theinvisiblegirl]

There are Christian counselors who have gone through real school. I only know because, one day (after Joshgate 1, well before Derick posted it in his bogus self-help series) I got curious about it myself and looked up counselors on Psychology Today (where I originally found my therapist). Once I searched by my zip code, there's a menu on the side where you can tick of different things to narrow down your searches. One of the categories was "Faith", with Christian being one of the option. There's everything from a "drug and alcohol counselor" (with no degrees listed) to many who have masters degrees to someone with a PhD. Granted, I think you need to be pretty legit to advertise yourself on Psychology Today, but they are out there.

[BabyFreeZone]

My friend is getting her doctorate in psychology from a Christian university -- but it's a legit private university with rigorous courses. With a background like that, and being Christian herself, I'm sure she could advertise as a Christian psychology if she wanted to. She would tell you faith is great, but here are some actual tools for getting better.

[nastyhobbitses]

On 7/2/2016 at 10:57 PM, Four is Enough said:

What is that, exactly?

Some fundie who went to Clown College and took like 3 classes that basically said that depression is just insufficient love of God or whatever.

[nst]

this may be old news but Pickles has a screen grab of the Growing up Duggar revised editions blurb and there are quotes from the married ones 

apparently Derick is confirming that he had girlfriends before Jill (he had relationships) 

and that Jessa and Ben talked on the phone in private during courting - imagine those conversations 

[Fundie Bunny]

2 hours ago, nst said:

this may be old news but Pickles has a screen grab of the Growing up Duggar revised editions blurb and there are quotes from the married ones 

apparently Derick is confirming that he had girlfriends before Jill (he had relationships) 

and that Jessa and Ben talked on the phone in private during courting - imagine those conversations 

Jessa: Oh sweet love, i was enchanted by the majestic pearls you gave me!

Ben: Oh, yes dear. Mind if i go to the big house? I need to pee and i think a racoon has gotten into the shed

[nst]

1 minute ago, Fundie Bunny said:

Jessa: Oh sweet love, i was enchanted by the majestic pearls you gave me!

Ben: Oh, yes dear. Mind if i go to the big house? I need to pee and i think a racoon has gotten into the shed

Jessa: Tell me when you felt the lord lift you from your heathens 

Ben: I applaud you for using such strong words, I can't wait to make a Spurgeon with you 

and we are talking about 11 months of private convos - imagine how they planned the kissing at the wedding  

 

[Fundie Bunny]

1 minute ago, nst said:

Jessa: Tell me when you felt the lord lift you from your heathens 

Ben: I applaud you for using such strong words, I can't wait to make a Spurgeon with you 

That's quite accurate

[nst]

3 minutes ago, Fundie Bunny said:

That's quite accurate

Jessa: Who is Spurgeon 

Ben: Our future son and the best man in the world, I will bring you a copy to the house in five minutes is anyone there

Jessa: just mama - but she is in the toliet 

Ben: I am coming now 

Jessa: you say that all the time 

 

[ksgranola1]

3 hours ago, nst said:

this may be old news but Pickles has a screen grab of the Growing up Duggar revised editions blurb and there are quotes from the married ones 

apparently Derick is confirming that he had girlfriends before Jill (he had relationships) 

and that Jessa and Ben talked on the phone in private during courting - imagine those conversations 

I thought JB/M had to be in on any & all texting/phone convos. Or is that more baloney, too?

[anotherone]

On ‎7‎/‎3‎/‎2016 at 10:41 AM, theinvisiblegirl said:

There's everything from a "drug and alcohol counselor" (with no degrees listed) to many who have masters degrees to someone with a PhD. Granted, I think you need to be pretty legit to advertise yourself on Psychology Today, but they are out there.

No, you just have to pay.  Just saying'.