What bugs you about the Duggars

[Nesomja]

What really bothers me is the way they have deliberately squashed their kids' natural instincts to question and explore from day 1. It's not surprising that they don't question now, nor that they don't seem to use real life experiences as jumping boards for learning and investigations, if you think that from very early on their life has been about repression, not exploration. I have been thinking about blanket training recently - the 'playpen in your pocket' and one of the things that is so dreadful about it is that you are creating the playpen in your child's HEAD, you are punishing them for exploring the world. So it's not really surprising that those children grow up unable to ask challenging questions, that has never been rewarded or encouraged. That, I guess, the children will carry with them forever.

[freejoytoo]

Their sexist ideology and total rejection of science and how they can't teach yet refuse to send their children to school.

In some ways people's reactions annoy me more, like how they swallow the wholesome Christian family idea hook, line and sinker, especially when we all know that if the Duggars were of another skin colour or race they wouldn't like them at all. I also hate how everyone sucks up to them when they visit other countries or like when they went to the space centre and the guide gushed about Jim Bob would make such a wonderful astronaut. Er, first he'd have to accept the laws of physics and actually value education.

[Chrystal-J]

What bugs me is they don't want the best for their children. They don't give their children a good education. They keep them sheltered. Michelle doesn't take care of her children. They think they are better than everyone else. They are hypocrites.

Ditto here. It's all about the parents and what they want.

[Jessica]

The fact that Anna was perfectly content to give birth on a nasty bus. If you're doing the full-time RV thing (see the Technomadia blog for example) and have the space prepared, cleaned, and ready with a midwife present, cool. But a filthy, crowded bus full of germy, gross kids just for the ratings and publicity? If she were just your average person and not someone on TV you KNOW CPS (or some other gov't agency) would be making her get her head checked.

[bellicosebroad]

So much bothers me, but one glaringly obvious horror is that that J'Slaves are always hollow-eyed and exhausted (and have deep depression, I think, especially Jana) while J'chelle and JBoob always exude Health! and Happiness! and Vitality! while they make googly eyes at each other. Yeah, I'd be well-rested and on a perpetual honeymoon with my spouse if I bred slaves so I never had to do anything, too, you selfish assholes.

[Guest Anonymous]

What DOESN'T bug me about the Duggars? You'll get a shorter answer.

[Aurora]

What DOESN'T bug me about the Duggars? You'll get a shorter answer.

:lol: I thought that several times when seeing this thread!!

[Quadrophenia]

JB always talking about how important it is that in America you can vote and have your voice heard, when he has all the makings of the perfect dictator. He spews out a few choice mantras ad nauseum (blessings, training, servant's heart...) and controls absolutely everything his kids see, hear, do and say. Kim Jung Il would have been proud, and probably could have learned a thing or two!

[Red]

The Gothard influences, the lies, the limitations and demands on their older children... and I have nothing against large families. I used to defend the Duggars, as a matriarch of a large family myself. Less than half their size, but large. That brings me to something else that bugs me about them, and that is how they have popularized the concept of fundies having large families. People assume every white person with a large family is a fundie nowadays. Abuse can exist in families of any size. Abuse is what bothers me the most, and the way it is hidden behind smiling faces for the camera. My mother abused the hell out of her kids, especially me and my sister, and often in the name of religion, but everyone around her thought she was a nice woman because of her public persona. No action is taken against people who play that game too well.

[Nesomja]

I also really can't stand the look of wonderment and awe on J'chelle's face as she listens to

JB drivel on. What do you suppose it says in the gothard literature to encourage that behaviour?

[alysee]

I also really can't stand the look of wonderment and awe on J'chelle's face as she listens to

JB drivel on. What do you suppose it says in the gothard literature to encourage that behaviour?

That would just be general men are supposed to be the head of the women and family.

[GolightlyGrrl]

What DOESN'T bug me about the Duggars? You'll get a shorter answer.

This! While reading this thread, I kept nodding my head at everyone's remarks. If I wrote a list of what bugs me about the Duggars I would have a list as long as my arm.

[Red Molly]

Their existence?

[Guest Anonymous]

That would just be general men are supposed to be the head of the women and family.

Actually, in her so-called "Rules For A Happy Marriage" there IS a passage advising wives to look admiringly at their husbands when they speak, especially in public.

[gilora]

What bugs me is they don't want the best for their children. They don't give their children a good education. They keep them sheltered. Michelle doesn't take care of her children. They think they are better than everyone else. They are hypocrites.

This.

Josh wanted to be a lawyer, now he sells used cars for Daddy.

John David wanted to be a pilot, now he tows cars for Daddy.

Jill wants to be a nurse, she has College Plus and midwife "training."

(Not that there's anything wrong with selling used cars or driving a tow truck if that's what you want to be doing.) What drives me nuts is that Jim Bob could easily afford to send his children to college and instead chooses to keep them subservient and pimp them out to College Plus.

[warpedfactor9]

What about the fact that Jim Boob gets the kids confused? That would bug me to have to remind dad which kid I am. "I'm Jedidiah dad" or whatnot. How valued as individuals can they be if mom and dad don't even know their names?

[Red]

Actually, in her so-called "Rules For A Happy Marriage" there IS a passage advising wives to look admiringly at their husbands when they speak, especially in public.

That is so weird! I'd probably laugh if I consciously tried to do that and my husband would no doubt ask if I was okay.

This.

Josh wanted to be a lawyer, now he sells used cars for Daddy.

John David wanted to be a pilot, now he tows cars for Daddy.

Jill wants to be a nurse, she has College Plus and midwife "training."

(Not that there's anything wrong with selling used cars or driving a tow truck if that's what you want to be doing.) What drives me nuts is that Jim Bob could easily afford to send his children to college and instead chooses to keep them subservient and pimp them out to College Plus.

Ah yeah. As most people aren't rich, this gets overlooked because, well, I think the general audience forgets that the Duggars are wealthy enough to give their kids far more opportunities.

What about the fact that Jim Boob gets the kids confused? That would bug me to have to remind dad which kid I am. "I'm Jedidiah dad" or whatnot. How valued as individuals can they be if mom and dad don't even know their names?

All parents of more than one kid mix up names sometimes, especially similar sounding names, but Jim Bob can't remember his kids' birthdays.

[xReems]

It bothers the crap out of me how they think that by throwing in the word "God" to any situation makes it better and more understanding. For example-they claim that when you date, you give pieces of your heart away, yet, in courtship, the same shit can happen but it's okay because "God had better plans" for them. Funny how God can suddenly change His mind from bringing two people together and then saying "oh my bad" down the road. They think that because parents are heavily involved, pieces of your heart are not given away. True, you might not be intimate, but having deep conversations with someone who wants to have a courtship with you "with the INTENT OF MARRIAGE" means you're going to give a piece of your heart away by sharing your deepest thoughts.

[Red]

Welp, I saw their Santorum video. I'm scared.

[Nesomja]

Actually, in her so-called "Rules For A Happy Marriage" there IS a passage advising wives to look admiringly at their husbands when they speak, especially in public.

And that's exactly what it looks like, following a rule for a happy life! It would make me very uncomfortable if someone stared at me with that vacant expression of devotion on their face, it's so non-specific. JB must know it has nothing to do with anything he actually SAYS, so what's the point?

[Tator Tot Tubby]

Michelle's never ending fertility is a bit annoying

on a side note, can you imagine how much she could have made as a surrogate?

[Guest]

And that is what bugs me re the Duggars. They put a happy smiley face on something which most people, if they knew, would regard as actively dangerous.

This sums up my feelings exactly. Well put.

[Conuly]

What about the fact that Jim Boob gets the kids confused? That would bug me to have to remind dad which kid I am. "I'm Jedidiah dad" or whatnot. How valued as individuals can they be if mom and dad don't even know their names?

Anybody with two kids can do that. Heck, even with one kid!

Having a very large family who all share the same initial is asking for trouble in that area, absolutely, but I can't tell you how many times my parents would call "Ging- I mean, Connie!" or I address my nieces as "Ana-Eva-WHOever-you-are!" And I only have one sister and two nieces! (My father was genuinely very upset at mixing up our names, incidentally, because his mother had done that with him and his brother and as a child he had felt it was because she favored his brother. Which she may have, but he wasn't happy to find out that it can happen to anybody.)

Back to the very first comment, I'm okay with redoing chapters until you get it right. Isn't that one of the advantages of homeschooling, that you can teach at your child's pace and make sure he or she masters the material before moving on? It's not like in a classroom of 20 kids where you have to say "Look, Emma, I'm sorry you failed the unit on multiplication but we're doing division now. You'll have to do division too, even if you don't have the foundation needed to succeed in this" or "Okay, Aiden, it's too bad you failed our section on the Civil War, but now we're doing WWI. The Civil War isn't that important to know, you'll do better in this section."

I'd rather see "So you failed multiplication. We'll just work harder until you have it down pat before we move on" or "Okay, what do you have trouble understanding about the Civil War? Let's review until you get it, it IS important".

This can't be easily done in a class of 20 kids, or 25 kids, or 35 kids, but it can be done in a family of only two or four kids. (Of course, that blows the Duggars right out of the water, with a zillion kids at a zillion wildly different levels, but that's assuming they're interested in educating their kids in the first place. As a general rule I'm okay with students, homeschooled or otherwise, being able to continue redoing their work until they master it. Learning is the important thing, not getting a grade. That does not mean I necessarily think that the end result, mastery, is happening with the Duggar children.)

[Tator Tot Tubby]

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[StarrieEyedKat]

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