Political Memes, Comics, and other Shenanigans, Part 36

[GreyhoundFan]

[GreyhoundFan]

[GreyhoundFan]

[GreyhoundFan]

[Audrey2]

11 hours ago, GreyhoundFan said:

And if they happen to get a woman pregnant then "it's not mine!" "She was cheating on me!" "She was sleeping around!"

[fraurosena]

Visualization of the terrible truth:

[fraurosena]

 

[Xan]

11 hours ago, fraurosena said:

Visualization of the terrible truth:

I noticed that they hadn't included the Civil War.  The best estimates for deaths due to the Civil War are between 620,000 and 750,000.  Pretty soon we'll even eclipse the highest Civil War total.  I understand that it wasn't a foreign conflict.  I just think it's useful for comparison.

Edited October 7, 2021 by Xan

[smittykins]

22 hours ago, Audrey2 said:

And if they happen to get a woman pregnant then "it's not mine!" "She was cheating on me!" "She was sleeping around!"

“She should have been taking the Pill!”(Because it’s her responsibility to not get pregnant, amirite?)

Edited October 7, 2021 by smittykins

[Audrey2]

8 hours ago, smittykins said:

“She should have been taking the Pill!”(Because it’s her responsibility to not get pregnant, amirite?)

Of course. "But wearing a condom reduces the feeling for me and reduces my enjoyment. Really sweetie just this once, can I skip the condom?"

[smittykins]

“Besides, I’m just soooo big that condoms are too tight!”

 

[AnywhereButHere]

[Howl]

On 10/6/2021 at 11:02 AM, GreyhoundFan said:

I am a Texan. I am not laughing, because...way too real. 

I can see this working as Republican Jesus 

 

Edited October 10, 2021 by Howl

[ADoyle90815]

[GreyhoundFan]

 

"Fun With Fake Privilege"

Quote

Today’s cartoon is partly based on something you probably don’t know anything about. I hate to have to explain a cartoon, or even part of it, but I feel I must with this one.

President Biden has used a set of the White House for a few speeches, instead of doing them in the actual White House. It’s a sound stage located in the Eisenhower Executive Building which is a part of the White House grounds. It’s the kind of place you’ve seen without knowing you’re seeing it. When Al Gore gave his concession speech in 2000, it was from this building, perhaps in the same room as the one containing the sound stage. Ever watch the TV show Veep? Julia Louis-Dreyfus’ character’s office is in this building. Even Donald Trump has used it for signing documents in front of cameras. When President Biden got his first vaccine on camera, he did it in this room. Trump took his vaccine in a closet.

Why do they use this set instead of the White House? I’m not sure. Maybe you can get more people into it. Maybe the lighting is better. Baby Goebbels Steven Miller claims Biden uses it because he can use a monitor there that won’t reflect on his glasses or something like that, that can’t be used in the White House for some reason. But, Republicans are freaking out about this because President Biden has used it with a set that looks like it’s from the White House. There’s a fake Rose Garden behind him. For Republicans, this is as much of an outrage as mustard on a burger or a president in a grey suit. The reason you have not heard of this outrage is because it’s a fake outrage.

While people on Fox News are outraged, Qanon has used it as evidence that President Joe Biden is not president and Donald Trump is still in charge and in the actual White House. Never mind all the events, speeches, and videos of President Biden in the White House, or the fact Trump hasn’t been in the capital since inauguration day when he fled to Mar-a-Lago with his tail between his legs.

This is fake outrage over a fake White House set by a bunch of fake patriots who believe in a fake president. Their fake president believes he has fake authority, like executive privilege.

The January 6 Committee investigating Trump’s coup attempt and attack on the Capitol have subpoenaed individuals from the Trump administration and documents. Trump has claimed executive privilege over the documents and is telling his subpoenaed goons not to cooperate. Goons like Steve Bannon, who already did so much gooning for Trump that he had to get a Trump pardon.

Trump is trying to assert privilege over 45 specific documents identified by the National Archives as responsive to the committee’s request. Those documents, Trump said in a two-page letter to Archivist of the United States David Ferriero, included protected “presidential communications,” as well as deliberative process materials and attorney-client privileged materials.

Trump also wants to preemptively declare future requests by the panel, “potentially numbering in the millions,” as presumptively barred from release. He wrote, or some lawyer for him, “Should the committee persist in seeking other privileged information, I will take all necessary and appropriate steps to defend the Office of the Presidency.”

It’s funny to hear someone claim they’re “protecting the presidency” after he tried to replace it with a fascist dictatorship.

A lawyer for Steve Bannon told the House committee that Bannon would refuse to comply with any subpoenas or investigation because of Trump’s claim he can invoke executive privilege to block Bannon’s testimony. Even if Trump can invoke executive privilege, Bannon was years removed from the White House, was not a part of the Trump administration at the time of the election or attack on the Capitol, and is not Trump’s lawyer. Trump, even if was still president, cannot claim every conversation he has is privileged. Also, you don’t have attorney-client privilege when your attorney was a partner in your criminal activities. Ask Michael Cohen.

Here’s the fun part, kids: President Biden, the actual president, is not going to allow Trump to invoke executive privilege over the documents the committee seeks. White House counsel Dana Remus wrote the National Archive, where these documents are being preserved, “After my consultations with the Office of Legal Counsel at the Department of Justice, President Biden has determined than an assertion of executive privilege is not in the best interests of the United States, and therefore is not justified as to any of the Documents.”

Trump has 30 days to challenge this in court, which will also be an acknowledgement that Biden won the election. But, I expect this court challenge to fail like most Trump challenges in courts fail. Maybe he should get Sidney Powell and Rudy Giuliani to argue the case. Oops, that’s right. Rudy can’t practice law in New York City or Washington, D.C. right now because he’s been cited for lying in court. Lawyers aren’t supposed to do that. Plus, Rudy may be a witness. Also, Sidney should be a witness. But, it’s going to be fun to watch a former president (sic) challenge the authority of a current president.

What the House needs to do is charge every Trump goon who refuses to comply with criminal contempt. They refused to charge non-complying witnesses during the Trump administration, like when John Bolton didn’t want to testify and give out information he was saving for his crappy book.

House Democrats, the Biden/Garland Justice Department, and Joe Biden, the real president, need to come down hard in this investigation. The people they are seeking to testify aided and abetted a criminal act. These people tried to destroy our democracy and overturn an election through violence. There needs to be accountability.

And the final accountability will be Trump going to prison. And I’m talking about a real prison, not a fake one.

 

[GreyhoundFan]

 

"Trump Swingers"

Quote

Mike Pence is a worm and he’s always been a worm. But for one shining moment, for him at least, it seemed he had re-grown his backbone, or grown a first one, and stood up for the nation, democracy, and the United States Constitution. The man who probably snored praises for Donald Trump, who had replaced Christ with Donald Trump, who couldn’t state three sentences without inserting the term “thanks to Donald Trump’s leadership,” and who is probably still trying to brush the taste of Trump’s ass out of his mouth, stood up and finally put something before worship to all that is Donald Trump.

Mike Pence had shed whatever dignity he had before 2016 to be Trump’s lap poodle, lickspittle, toady, flunky, minion, apple polisher, yes man, brown noser, fawner, doormat, sycophant, first-in-line ass kisser.

The vice president presides over Congress’ certification of presidential elections. Donald Trump wanted Pence to use this position to overturn the election by not allowing the certification. Donald Trump told the angry mob at a hate rally before the attack on the Capitol, “I hope Mike is going to do the right thing. I hope so. I hope so.”

“Because if Mike Pence does the right thing, we win the election. All he has to do, all this is, this is from the number one, or certainly one of the top, Constitutional lawyers in our country. He has the absolute right to do it. We’re supposed to protect our country, support our country, support our Constitution, and protect our constitution.”

“All Vice President Pence has to do is send it back to the states to recertify and we become president and you are the happiest people.”

“And I actually, I just spoke to Mike. I said: “Mike, that doesn’t take courage. What takes courage is to do nothing. That takes courage.” And then we’re stuck with a president who lost the election by a lot and we have to live with that for four more years. We’re just not going to let that happen.”

After Mike Pence refused to refuse the certification, the Trump mob attacked the Capitol. Pence and his family were evacuated, and then Trump tweeted to his mob, “Mike Pence didn’t have the courage to do what should have been done to protect our Country and our Constitution.”

Trump knew the mob was inside the Capitol. Instead of calling them off, he was giving them targets. Donald Trump sent an angry mob with nooses to go after the man who had spent the past four years groveling at his feet, supporting his lies, and aiding in the destruction of the country.

Donald Trump literally tried to have his vice president murdered. Why is Donald Trump not in prison?

Mike Pence spent four years performing as someone who would sacrifice himself for Donald Trump, but when that moment came, he ran for his life. Donald Trump did nothing to call of the mob with nooses from killing Mike Pence.

Donald Trump is a racist lying treasonous piece of shit and Mike Pence, well, he’s still a worm.

While talking to Sean Hannity on Fox News last week, Mike Pence said, “I know the media wants to distract from the Biden administration’s failed agenda by focusing on one day in January. They want to use that one day to try and demean the character and intentions of 74 million Americans who believed we could be strong again and prosperous again and supported our administration in 2016 and 2020.”

Pence, you demean yourself. Donald Trump lost the election fairly. While 74 million Americans voted for him, 81 million voted for President Joe Biden. You lost and you know it, or at least you did that “one day in January.”

Mike Pence, the worm, has joined the rest of the ridiculous Republican cowards who’ve spent the past ten months downplaying this attack. For Pence, it was just “one day in January.” It was one day in January white supremacist terrorists, encouraged by Donald Trump, tried to destroy democracy.

You guys are still losing your shit over protesters for attacking a Target in Minnesota over the murder of George Floyd, but the attack by white nationalists on the citadel of democracy was just “one day in January.” Really?

And now we’ve learned that doing the right thing was only the last resort for Mike Pence. He was seeking a way to do just as Donald Trump asked, which was to toss out a free and fair democratic election, destroy democracy, disobey a duty mandated by the United States Constitution, and install Donald Trump as a fascist dictator. And who talked Mike Pence out of doing that? A guy who can’t even spell “potato.”

After criticizing Donald Trump for the riot and attack on democracy, Nikki Haley and Kevin McCarthy both went groveling back to Trump. Mike Pence is now doing the same. It might be working because Trump praised Pence while also throwing an ass-kissing bone to Hannity.

Trump said, “Vice President Mike Pence’s statement during his interview with the great Sean Hannity very much destroys and discredits the Unselect Committees Witch Hunt on the events of January 6th.”

Did I mention the Trump mob, while inside the Capitol, was chanting, “Hang Mike Pence”? Donald Trump didn’t mention that.

It happened one day in January.

Story time: I don’t expect many of my clients to publish this cartoon because of the imagery.

Back in the day when newspapers still had some money and would annually grant raises, they also did performance reviews. During one review, I got a raise and was commended for my work while my editor received a criticism from his boss for something I did. They scolded my boss for allowing a lynching cartoon of mine to be published on the opinion page. And this scolding came several months later. It came off like I was a monkey and not responsible for my actions. You know you can’t leave him alone in the kitchen. He’ll put forks in the microwave.

Little did either of us know there was a company policy not written down anywhere that there was to be no references to lynching in the newspaper. Even though the issue was lynching, as our newspaper had reported our then-senator, George Allen, had a noose in his office as a souvenir, probably because he’s racist. So, I drew a cartoon on something reported in our paper, and my boss got in trouble for letting me do it.

I was OK with that. I got my three percent raise. But, I never got to draw another noose for The Free Lance-Star again. Cowards.

 

[GreyhoundFan]

[GreyhoundFan]

 

"One America Haters"

Quote

According to a report by Reuters, which is an actual news source, AT&T helped create the far-right NON-news source One America News (OAN). Reuters’ report has been confirmed by CNN another legitimate news source. Why is this significant? Because AT&T owns CNN.

Full disclosure time: I work for CNN. I am a freelancer who provides one cartoon each week for the CNN Opinion newsletter. But I’m still a small fish in the grand scheme of things and I’m probably more on AT&T’s radar as a customer than I am as a freelance employee. Ya’ see, my wireless service is through AT&T. My iPhone was purchased at AT&T. My iPad was also purchased at AT&T. I am making payments to AT&T each month for my wireless service, iPhone, and iPad. Fun fact: This cartoon poking fun at AT&T was drawn on an iPad purchased from AT&T. Also, this cartoon making fun of Facebook has already been posted on Facebook. BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

Anyway…CNN has covered this story as they should. They cover criticism of competing networks and other news outlets all the time. As fair and responsible journalists, they are required to cover it. Check out this clip of Don Lemon and Oliver Darcy. Lemon and Darcy are not the only CNN people to tackle this subject. Don Lemon said what airs from OAN is as “corrosive as anything that comes from Facebook.”

One America News is NOT a news source. It’s a conspiracy network, but AT&T, which owns Time Warner, probably views it as just another revenue stream to put on TV like Comedy Central, Cartoon Network, and Nickelodean (I don’t know who owns those but they’re on AT&T platforms). Now, with OAN, we have the Yee-Haw Network.

Robert Herring, who is the founder and chief executive of OAN, has testified that the inspiration to launch his network in 2013 came from AT&T executives.

AT&T-owns television platforms, including satellite broadcaster DirecTV. AT&T is the largest communications company on the planet. They’re bigger than Oprah. According to Herring in a 2019 deposition, “They (AT&T) told us they wanted a conservative network. They only had one, which was Fox News, and they had seven others on the other (liberals) side. When they said that, I jumped to it and built one.” Now, according to a 2020 sworn testimony by an OAN accountant, AT&T accounts for 90 percent of OAN’s revenue.

Herring has testified he was offered $250 million for OAN in 2019. Without the DirecTV deal, the accountant said under oath, the network’s value “would be zero.”

Take one moment to let this sink in: If it wasn’t for the owners of CNN, how much would Fox News be worth? Fox News is on those same platforms.

AT&T may be looking to break CNN off from Time Warner and sell it to pay off debts, which makes you wonder if AT&T views CNN, one of the nation’s best news outlets, the same way they view OAN, one of America’s most notorious bullshit outlets. Corporations may only see dollar signs.

While AT&T can claim responsibility for facts and journalism being provided to the world from the USA’s best news network, they’re also responsible for helping push lies and conspiracy theories about the Big Lie Trump won the election and spreading conspiracy theories about the coronavirus.

AT&T defended itself saying it’s not a revenue stream for OAN and they initially refused to carry the network on DirecTV, but did cave after OAN sued them. AT&T says they don’t control any programming and any decisions to continue carrying OAN will be up to DirecTV, which has been spun off into its own separate company….with 70 percent still owned by AT&T (somebody does research. Cough. Cough).

NAACP President Derrick Johnson said in a statement issued on Wednesday, “We are outraged to learn that AT&T has been funneling tens of millions of dollars into OAN since the network’s inception. As a result, AT&T has caused irreparable damage to our democracy. The press should inform the American public with facts, not far-right propaganda and conspiracy theories.”

AT&T may not be the press, but they are caretakers of journalism and a media giant. There should be corporate responsibility. Hell, I get mad at news outlets for publishing far-right conspiracy MAGAt cartoons, and the syndicates that distribute them. For syndicates like Cagle Cartoon and my former agency, Creators Syndicate, there’s no accepted responsibility for poisoning our nation with toxic bullshit. While all sides should be presented equally, there should be a line that stops at conspiracy theories. It’s bad enough news outlets have to quote Donald Trump.

I’m sure executives at AT&T aren’t writing copy for OAN, which is a network for people who find Tucker Carlson too woke. But, according to these reports, there wouldn’t be an OAN to poison our nation if it wasn’t for the efforts and enthusiasm of executives at AT&T.

And if AT&T gets mad at me for this, Hey, AT&T guys….I’m just an insignificant small fry. Nobody cares about me. Nobody reads this blog. Look at Don Lemon! Yeah, that guy was doing all sorts of smack-talking about you, and he was doing it in front of millions of viewers. Did you hear him say “corrosive”? You should go deal with him and ignore what’s going on over here. Tomorrow, I might go back to making jokes about Nickelback. I’m crazy. Nobody listens to me. Also, have I told you how much I love the iPad you sold me? It’s really wonderful and the iPhone, don’t get me started. I love the way my iPad rides on my iPhone’s hotspot when I leave my home…and did I mention I bought Airpods too? See? I’m not that bad. Right? Hello?

Another fun fact: It’s time for me to draw this week’s cartoon for CNN. Pray for me.

Creative note: I was going to put AT&T’s spokesperson, Lilly, in this cartoon. She’s to AT&T what Flo is to that insurance company and the gecko is to that other insurance company (see how well advertising works?). But, I didn’t know if Lilly was known well enough and I kinda have a crush on her. So, she escaped my wrath unscathed this time. Lilly, call me.

 

[GreyhoundFan]

 

"Sticky By The Sea"

Quote

Oil pipelines do two things. They transfer oil and they leak oil. Saturday, a 17-mile-long pipeline in southern California cracked and leaked at least 3,111 barrels, or 127,000 gallons, of crude oil. The pipeline, that was laid down when Elvis was still alive, is owned by Amplify Energy. Since it was the owners of the pipeline telling us it leaked 127,000 gallons, that means it was a lot more.

Why did this pipeline rupture? Did a ship slap it around? Did a shark give it a chomp? Did a seal use it as a backscratcher? The answer is probably, it’s just old. Also, it’s a pipeline. Leaking is what they do eventually.

Amplify says they stopped the leak and suctioned off the pipeline at both ends. Seeing as how they’re destroying the environment and sea life, California environmentalists are telling Amplify they got something for them they can suction off.

This spill is small compared to others, even one at that the same location, Huntington Beach, in 1990 which leaked 417,000 gallons. A 1969 spill along Santa Barbara was 4.2 million gallons, the 1989 Exxon Valdez spill in Alaska was 11 million gallons, and the 2010 Deepwater Horizon in the Gulf of Mexico was 134 million gallons. This new one would only fill about 20 percent of an Olympic-sized swimming pool, or 17 percent rinsed out of Donald Trump Jr’s hair.

Even though this amount of leaked oil is smaller than other oil disasters, it’s still catastrophic for wildfire…and it’s something you can use to remind people why we shouldn’t allow the Keystone Pipeline to cross our nation from Canada to the Gulf of Mexico…except you don’t need this example. You can use the Keystone Pipeline as an example against the Keystone Pipeline.

In 2019, the Keystone Pipeline burst and leaked 383,000 gallons of crude oil in North Dakota. This pipeline owned by Canada could barely wait to leave Canada to start leaking, as it did it 50 miles from the border. One reason the Canadian owners, TC Energy, want it to run through the United States is so that it doesn’t leak in Canada.

Catherine Collentine, an associate director with the Sierra Club has said, “It’s not a question of whether a pipeline will spill, but when.” The people who make the best cases against oil pipelines are the companies who own them.

The cost to the environment in our nation isn’t worth the profit we’ll get from the Keystone Pipeline. It may only create 20 fulltime jobs in the United States with the majority of earnings going to other nations, like Canada. We could probably create more jobs in this nation by syphoning off the residue from DJTJ’s hair.

We need less investment in sticky nasty-ass environment and animal-killing crude oil, and more investment in green energy.

 

[GreyhoundFan]

Youngkin is the Trumplican candidate for governor in Virginia. He tries to talk out of both sides of his mouth, being a "reasonable conservative" to suburban audiences and full on trumpster in the red areas of Virginia. I hope and pray he doesn't win next month.

 

"Youngkin Education"

Quote

During the final debate between Democratic candidate and former governor Terry McAuliffe and Republican candidate, Trump cultists, businessman, and job outsourcer, Glenn Youngkin, McAuliffe said he doesn’t believe “parents should be telling schools what they should teach.” Since then, that’s all Youngkin has been talking about.

Youngkin turned the footage into a digital ad, then announced spending $1 million on a commercial airing statewide proclaiming “Terry went on the attack against parents.” His campaign created a group called “Teachers for Youngkin” which sent out flyers talking about how McAuliffe is attacking parents. Tonight, Youngkin is going to stage a rally in Northern Virginia titled “Parents Matter.”

How dare a politician say something so callous as parents shouldn’t be telling teachers what to teach. It’s an outrage this big government liberal doesn’t want parents setting the curriculum. Why, what McAuliffe said…makes total and complete sense.

The people Youngkin is appealing to are the same people who want God in public education. They want school prayer. They don’t want vaccination or mask mandates in schools. They already believe teachers are indoctrinating students to be liberal, spit on the flag, and pledge allegiance to teacher unions. These are the same people screaming to remove Critical Race Theory from all public schools even though it’s not being taught in any public schools. These are the same people who believe Donald Trump won an election, January 6 was a protest, Ashley Babbitt just so happened to be strolling by innocently inside the Capitol when a police officer shot her, and that vaccines contain microchips.

Do you really want these people setting the agenda in public education? I bet Glenn Youngkin doesn’t either and is just using the issue as red meat to the Trump base he’s feeding. By going to Northern Virginia, Youngkin is hoping people who normally vote blue aren’t paying attention to the details…or to what he’s actually saying.

Have you seen the videos of parents screaming at school boards about vaccines and face masks? Have you seen the videos of them screaming at school board members and teachers in parking lots? These are not the people I want telling teachers how to teach. I would not trust these people to tell me how to microwave a Hot Pocket. “You have to be sure you stick the knives in the microwave.”

If a football coach can ignore a parent when they try to tell him how to run an offense or they should let their kid play quarterback, then teachers shouldn’t have to listen to dumbass parents. If a parent tells a teacher how we need more God in public school, I believe that teacher can legally give that parent a swirlie.

I’m a parent. Does that mean I can tell teachers to teach black lives matter?

Here’s the thing, kids: Parents do get a say in how their children are educated. It’s the same way they elect presidents, mayors, senators, representatives, etc. They get to vote on who sits on school boards. Voting is a voice. Go to school board and PTA meetings. Sure, be involved. But when you demand how your child is taught, you’re also demanding how my child is taught. But then again, you don’t understand that a virus can go from one child to another. How would you feel about a parent knowingly sending their kid to school with lice? Fun fact: Lice, like the coronavirus, don’t care if your kid’s parents are Democrats or Republicans.

Youngkin says he’s the guy for education and claims he wants to give teachers a pay increase. McAuliffe does too. But it’s Youngkin who wants to take money away from public schools and give it to private and charter schools. It’s Glenn Youngkin who wants to bring back segregation. Fun fact: Most private schools were created in the 1960s. Huh. I wonder why that is.

Glenn Youngkin proposed eliminating the state income tax, and then flipped his position. But did he really? If you really care about education, you should be concerned because eliminating the state income tax, which accounts for 72 percent of school funding, will force Virginia to lay off 43,000 teachers. Youngkin has a net worth of over $300 million which was earned by running an investment firm that gobbled up smaller companies and made them more profitable by laying people off and outsourcing jobs to Asia.

This year, CNBC ranked Virginia as the second-best in the nation for education. A high ranking in education makes Virginia extremely attractive for luring businesses from other states…and helps prevent businesses from leaving. A top-rate education system is great for economic development. Republicans need to go back to school to learn how that adds up because they haven’t connected two-plus-two on this issue yet. It’s like voting for Trump and not understanding why there’s an increase in Nazis and hate crimes.

They say the best way to destroy public education is to take away the state income tax. The second best way is to elect a Republican. Glenn Youngkin has the same ideas toward public education as Betsy DeVos, Trump’s Education Secretary who hates public education and believed we needed more guns in schools to save students from bear attacks. Virginia needs a Democratic governor to save schools from Republican attacks. Fun fact: Bears attack fewer Americans than Republican Nazis. Another fun fact: More students have died from mass shootings at schools than from bears.

Republicans hate public education. Don’t take it from. me Take it from Republicans.

Another fun fact: The least educated vote Republicans. As Donald Trump once said about voters, “I love the poorly educated.” He loves the poorly educated almost as he loves quarter pounders and Nazis. Glenn Youngkin will let the poorly educated tell teachers what to teach your child.

For the sake of your child, keep Virginia blue. Vote for Terry McAuliffe.

 

[GreyhoundFan]

[GreyhoundFan]

[GreyhoundFan]

[Cartmann99]

 

[Cartmann99]