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Political Memes, Comics, and other Shenanigans, Part 36


GreyhoundFan
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Continued from here:

 

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"Vax That Salad"

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I had a stop-the-presses moment last night.

Like I do every day, I had jotted down potential topics to cartoon about. Some of the topics are heavy subjects, like immigration, the debt ceiling, Texas abortion, missing indigenous people and Gabby Petito, Haiti, Trump’s lawsuits, etc, etc. As I said before, I like to have a definite idea (not just a concept) for my next cartoon before going to bed. I will toss and turn all night and have nightmares of crosshatching if I don’t. Seriously, I have dreams of crosshatching.

Around 11:00 P.M, I heard the news about disgraced scumbag General and former National Security Adviser Michael Flynn. This guy is a piece of work. But, my gears went into motion for a Flynn cartoon. I wrote down three ideas and was giggling with each of them. I cracked open a Blue Moon while amusing myself and kept writing, self-editing, more writing, another Blue Moon, and then at 2:00 A.M, I said to myself, “Oh my god, it’s 2:00 A.M.” I knew I had my idea and I should get some sleep. The debt ceiling can wait. Michael Flynn said something stupid.

Flynn was forced into retirement from the military and there are rumors this is because he’s a raving lunatic. President Obama knew Flynn was a liar and had him removed from his position as Assistant Director of National Intelligence. During Flynn’s tenure, he became the first official from the United States invited into the Russian Military Intelligence headquarters in Moscow, which was seriously frowned upon by our government. He attempted a second visit which was thwarted. Then, he tried to get Russian intelligence officials inside the headquarters for the Central Intelligence Agency, which was knocked down by James Clapper, the Director of National Intelligence. There was concern, and it was reported by other officials that Flynn may have been compromised by the Russians. Ya’ think?

After he was fired, he was paid to speak at a Moscow event where he shared a table with Vladimir Putin. He later argued that Russia didn’t pay him. They paid his agent who then paid him. It’s that kind of logic that’ll get you a high-ranking position with the Trump administration…that and being compromised by the Russians.

President Obama advised Donald Trump NOT to hire Michael Flynn, probably because he’s compromised by the Russians. So naturally, Trump hired Michael Flynn as his National Security Adviser, and once again, proving President Obama is much smarter than he is. Flynn didn’t last a month as he had to be fired, supposedly for lying to the vice-president (sic) over his communications with…take a guess…Russians.

Later, he struck a plea-bargain admitting guilt in lying to the FBI which he later recanted probably because he knew he’d get a Trump pardon. Trump’s Justice Department tried to drop the case that Robert Mueller has already sent to the courts. Later, Donald Trump pardoned Flynn.

Then, Flynn took an oath pledging loyalty to Qanon which supersedes the oath he took swearing loyalty and to protect the United States and Constitution. In the aftermath of Trump losing the election, Flynn, and the attorney they shared, conspiracy theorist Sidney Powell, met with Trump in the Oval Office and suggested he suspend the Constitution, silence the press (people like me), declare martial law, and use the military to conduct a new election. Remember, this fucker took an oath to defend our nation and the Constitution and he’s in the Oval freaking Office, after being compromised by Russians and lying to the FBI, advocating the president (sic) suspend the Constitution and overthrow an election with a military coup. Go to Hell, Michael Flynn.

After Trump left the White House, because he lost the election to President Biden by seven million votes, Flynn voiced support for a “Myanmar-style coup” to restore Trump to power. Then, he got banned from Twitter for life.

Like all Trump supporters, and Trump himself, Michael Flynn was never about loyalty to the United States, patriotism, democracy, the Constitution, or free elections. Remember when we all shared those same principles, no matter our party affiliation? Turns out during all those years, Republicans were lying. Reinstating, or putting anybody in the White House without winning an election is un-American (except you, Gerald Ford, but that was a technicality). Even spreading the Big Lie is un-American.

That was just a brief summary of the lunacy, criminality, and sedition of Michael Flynn. There’s much more. Oh, so much more. There’s a lot about his denial and theories of the coronavirus and vaccines. He’s claimed in the past that the coronavirus is a hoax, was used to destroy Trump and to control us, and that you need a vaccine passport to travel. Now, he should know that’s a lie because he’s been traveling all over the country to speak at lunatic conventions about how you need a vaccine passport to travel. And last night, he supported a brand new conspiracy theory that the vaccine is being hidden in food, specifically salad dressing.

As a reader of mine already pointed out on the posting of this cartoon on Facebook, that dressing would Russian.

Appearing on some internet conspiracy show, Flynn said, “Somebody sent me a thing this morning where they’re talking about putting the vaccine into salad dressing. Or salads. Have you seen this? I mean it’s—and I’m thinking to myself, this is the Bizarro World, right? This is definitely the Bizarro World. … These people are seriously thinking about how to impose their will on us in our society, and it has to stop.” Really, Michael? A “thing?” I got a thing for ya’, you lying disgusting betraying traitor.

What is bizarre is Flynn was actually our National Security Adviser for 24 days. No, not the 24-days part.

There is a study by the University of California researching how vaccines could be grown in food, like plants (in case you’re a Republican, plants are what most salads consist of), so people could ingest their vaccines instead of being jabbed. But this is for the future, not now, and not to trick people. It probably won’t even be for COVID because hopefully, and if idiots like Flynn could stop getting in the way of it, COVID won’t exist anymore by the time we get edible vax.

There are people researching time travel and I know for a fact that doesn’t exist yet because if it did, Donald Trump never would have been president and we’d all be saying, “Michael Flynn who?”. Researching something doesn’t mean we have it. Wilbur and Orville had to research flight before they could actually fly. They didn’t just suddenly put a pair of wings on a bicycle and go, “Wheeee!”

I also know the government isn’t hiding vaccines to the coronavirus in salads. How do I know this? Because if the deep-state government people were hiding the vaccine to trick Trump cultists and Republicans, they wouldn’t be hiding it in salads. That wouldn’t help us stop the virus at all.

How do you trick a dog to eat a pill? You wrap the pill in cheese or peanut butter. You don’t put the pill inside cauliflower. You want the dog to eat it, not just look at with a quizzical expression. And if you give a dog cauliflower, he might run away. I would.

So Michael Flynn is trying to suggest the vaccine is hidden in a patch of arugula? Why didn’t he just claim it’s in sushi? We’d never get the vaccine inside them if they have to learn how to use chopsticks. Fork that!

But, Republicans aren’t eating a lot of vegetables. Look at Trump. He’s never eaten a salad in his life. He thinks the five food groups are, KFC, Big Macs, ketchup, hot dogs, and Arby’s. George H.W. Bush took an official presidential position against broccoli. The entire Republican Party freaked out when First Lady Michelle Obama tried to introduce more salads to America’s schoolchildren. No, if are going to hide the vaccine to trick Republicans, which will be easier than getting dogs to eat cheese, we’ll hide it in some shit they’ll actually eat.

Let’s start with Chick-fil-a. If nothing else, we can scare them from eating there and helping Chick-fil-a finance homophobic hate groups.

Here’s the plan, folks: We hide the vaccine in food the Chick-fil-a menu. We put that shit in their nuggets, their chicken sandwiches, their waffle fries. We’ll even put it in the lemonade. Chick-fil-a has salads but like the ones at McDonalds, I’m sure they’re just for show. Who the fuck goes to McDonalds to eat a salad?

Now, on Sundays, since Chick-fil-a is closed because they’re religious zealots, we’ll hide the vax in food at Cracker Barrel and Cheesecake Factory. Although we’re not actually doing any of this, let’s just say we are…and spread the word.

We, here at Deep-State Incorporated, in conjunction with our reptilian people baby-eating brethren, by praying to Satan, have also created an inhalable vaccine. We’re putting that in MyPillows.

Spread the word.

 

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Yes, this is a fake Faux screencap, but I wouldn't put it past DeathSantis.

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"Trump's Recount Disaster"

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Every time dumbass Donald Trump tries to steal the election, all he does is add more evidence and validation that he lost and Joe Biden won.

Donald Trump lost over 60 court cases trying to overturn the election. He lost each time he bullied state officials to overturn the election. He lost actual recounts and audits in multiple states. He lost when he tried to overturn the election through an insurrection and an attack on the United States Capitol.

All the evidence Trump lunatics claim they have has yet to be presented. Probably because those lunatics, Sidney Powell, Rudy Giuliani, and the MyPillow fucker, don’t have any real evidence. There was no ballot switching by voting machines or Italian satellites. There was no interference by the Clintons or George Soros. There was no manipulation by poll workers or the dead Hugo Chavez. There was no massive voter fraud. There was very little fake voting by dead people and undocumented immigrants. Most voter fraud that was found was committed by Republicans. The biggest case of election interference and fraud was committed by the President (sic) of the United States at that time, Donald Trump.

When Donald Trump called the Georgia Secretary of State, he said all he needed was enough votes that would give him one more than Joe Biden had. There were no reports of missing or uncounted votes. On election night while he was ahead, he demanded election officials stop counting votes. Weeks later, he was demanded that Georgia create votes. And the biggest evidence of Trump’s meddling was his not asking to find every “missing” vote, but just enough to give him one more than Biden had.

When Trump supporters who believe The Big Lie (that the election was stolen from Trump) are asked for any evidence to base their beliefs on, the best they can come up with is that Biden winning is just not believable to them. They don’t see how Joe Biden could beat Donald Trump.

And why is it so hard to believe Donald Trump lost? Donald Trump didn’t win the popular vote in 2016. Donald Trump never had an approval rating above 50 percent. Donald Trump has the lowest approval ratings of any president in the modern era, even lower than other modern one-termers, George H. W. Bush and Jimmy Carter. Yes, Donald Trump was less popular during his presidency than Jimmy Carter. Donald Trump took an amazing economy and trashed it. Donald Trump ignored and played down a pandemic that killed hundreds of thousands of Americans. Donald Trump told over 20,000 lies from the White House. Donald Trump spent his entire presidency dividing the nation. Donald Trump’s administration was full of corruption. Donald Trump was impeached twice. Donald Trump lost the House and Senate during his term. Donald Trump is also a juvenile racist sexist selfish illiterate stupid sonofabitch that doesn’t care about anything except Donald Trump. It’s hard to believe this Nazi-praising orange shitweasel with the painted combover lost a presidential election?

They also say they can’t believe Trump lost because Joe Biden didn’t campaign as much. If he had, his margin of victory over Trump would have probably been greater than the seven million it was.

And now we have more evidence Donald Trump lost the election because the recount in Arizona has confirmed he lost. In fact, that recount took votes away from Trump and gave more to Biden.

What’s even more embarrassing is the recount was supposed to find fraud and claim Trump won. The recount wasn’t supposed to assure us of election integrity in 2020. It was just to give Arizona to Trump. The recount was given to a private corporation that is pro-Trump and has zero experience recounting elections. Maybe the inability to find fraud and more votes for Trump is why it took them six months to count it.

Most recounts are done in a day or two. This took six months. It started last April, six months after the election. This fraud of an audit actually cost Arizona taxpayers over $6 million. But that Republican-led chicanery was a bargain compared to California’s bogus recall that cost around $300 million. Remember when conservatives were supposed to be the fiscally-conservative guys?

Trump isn’t happy with the Arizona recount results and falsely claimed it “conclusively shows there were enough fraudulent votes, mystery votes, and fake votes to change the outcome of the election 4 or 5 times over.” But that’s not true. It didn’t find enough “fraudulent, mystery, or fake” votes to change the outcome once. Trump, you lost. And, you lost again.

Now, Donald Trump wants Texas to conduct an audit of the election which is weird because Trump won Texas. Greg Abbott, Texas’ horrible governor, caved into Trump’s demands and announced that a “full and comprehensive forensic audit” of four counties, three that Biden won, has already started, except it hasn’t.

Why does Trump want a recount in a state he won? Because Texas has a Trump cultist as its governor and this is another attempt to cast doubt on the election. In his demand to the governor, he referred to the election as a “scam.” It’s a scam in a state he won? He better be careful because he only won Texas by 5.5 percent. It could turn out like it did in Arizona and take votes away from Trump and give more to Biden. Maybe after they finish this recount, Biden will have won Texas too.

Republicans are also trying to copy Arizona’s recount in Wisconsin and Pennsylvania. Naturally, these recounts are partisan and being attempted by Trump goons.

Here’s the thing though, kids. Trump lost. And he keeps losing. In fact, new reports are revealing his White House knew he lost and there wasn’t any fraud.

All they’re doing with these recounts is giving more confirmation that Joe Biden is the president of the United States of America.

And the continued claims the election was fraudulent only works to tear down our democracy. Continuing with The Big Lie is the most un-American thing a lot of these people do. It’s almost as un-American as voting for Donald Trump.

 

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"Oops, White People Did It Again"

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Did you know in Wyoming, the state where Gabby Petito went missing, that over 700 indigenous people, over half of them women, went missing over the past decade?

Did you know over 50 percent of missing person cases involving a white individual gets news coverage while only 30 percent of missing indigenous people is covered?

Did you know over 11 percent of indigenous people are found within a week while 50 percent of white people are found in that time span? You do now.

And I know it now too as I wasn’t aware of any of that until a white blonde social media darling went missing.

Mary Johnson, a citizen of the Tulalip Tribes in Washington state went missing ten months ago. Last week, ten months after she went missing, the FBI offered a reward for information about her disappearance. Why did that take ten months?

Mary’s older sister said, “If that was a little white girl out there or a white woman, I’m sure they would have had helicopters, airplanes and dogs and searches.” And why shouldn’t she believe that? She believes that because it’s true.

John Walsh, the host of America’s Most Wanted, is doing everything he can to help police capture Gabby Petito’s fiancé, who’s a suspect in her homicide. Oh yeah. Gabby’s body has been found. Gabby’s disappearance will be examined on Walsh’s other show, “In Pursuit with John Walsh.” Maybe John Walsh has covered the disappearance of non-white women, but Gabby has definitely leaped over a LOT of non-white people who went missing before her. Maybe his show should be called, “In pursuit, if the victim is white, with John Walsh.”

Why is there a greater emphasis to find a missing white woman over non-white women? That is definitely racism. I guess part of white privilege is that if we’re murdered, they’ll probably find our body quicker than murdered darker skin people. We get taxis, promotions, less hassle at airports from TSA, and our discovered corpses.

Why is there greater media coverage for missing white people than for missing non-whites? That is racism but also ratings. But, why do missing white people bring in greater ratings than missing non-white people? Maybe Gabby’s coverage is because she was a social media personality while also being cute and blonde.

And I’m just as guilty as anyone else with this because I did a cartoon on Gabby before I even knew about the missing indigenous women. I wasn’t even aware of this issue until the journalists, whose shoulders I stand on, reported it. Now, it’s getting more coverage. But, when I did my last cartoon comparing the concern for Gabby to concern for Haitians at the border. I got screamed at by a lot of white people. This latest cartoon is on Twitter and already, I’ve been screamed at. Stop telling us things we don’t want to know!

This is not to downplay the tragedy of Gabby Petito. It’s to bring awareness so maybe other missing women receive the same attention and awareness as Gabby. I’m being accused of ignoring the abuse of a white woman by people ignoring the abuse of non-white women.

I’m not saying we should stop trying to end abuse of one some women while ignoring that of others. Can’t we help all of them? Can’t we at least stop ignoring women who need our help?

Meanwhile, we’re still talking about freeing Britney.

 

 

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"Biden's Miller Time"

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The reason the number of immigrants and refugees crashing our border increased after Donald Trump was kicked out of office by a free and fair democratic election is because Donald Trump was kicked out of office.

President Joe Biden promised a more humane and tolerant immigration policy that inspired thousands of immigrants, making them believe the door was now open. And while separating families is no longer official government policy, a lot of the Trump policies have remained in place, like child detainment.

Biden’s messaging to the world was a little messed up. He promised a more human treatment of refugees yet has continued a lot of Trumpian policies. We are still detaining children. We are still deporting refugees without allowing them to legally seek asylum. The rule Joe Biden is using to deport Haitians who haven’t been in Haiti for over a decade, back to Haiti, was designed by Stephen Miller.

Stephen Miller used his position as senior adviser in the Trump administration to push a racist xenophobic agenda that broke down and backlogged the asylum system. The Muslim ban was a favorite of the administration.

According to CNN, during a 2018 meeting in the White House, Miller asked the room, “What do you guys want? A bunch of Iraqs and ‘Stans across the country?” If you think the withdrawal from Afghanistan was a disaster, thank Trump for negotiating it with the Taliban and Stephen Miller for the backlog of Afghanis who helped U.S. forces. Or as Miller would call them, “Stans.”

Biden wasn’t ready for the border crisis. This is obvious. But maybe we stop using policies created by xenophobic creepazoid racists.

 

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