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Political Memes, Comics, and other Shenanigans, Part 36


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"Trumpkin For Governor"

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Glenn Youngkin is a businessman running for governor of Virginia as a moderate and rational Republican, which doesn’t exist anymore. But the thing is, he didn’t just run as an extremist in the primary. He ran as a MAGA Kool-Aid-swilling Trump cultist. And he wasn’t even the the biggest Trumper among the GOP candidates. There were two others worse than him. One female candidate described herself as “Trump in heels” which will now become my new favorite nightmare.

Fortunately for Youngkin, Republican voters don’t select their nominee. The people who scream about election integrity don’t even have one. The party selects the nominee at a state convention and the party knew that nominating a full-on cultist that’s been dipped in orange Trumper batter like a fairground corndog wouldn’t sell in Virginia, which went for President Biden by ten points last year. Over the past decade, Virginia has gotten bluer and bluer. A Republican presidential candidate has not won Virginia since 2004.

Today, every statewide elected office is held by a Democrat, even the ones who wore black face or assaulted women (Republicans are still worse). The House of Delegates is now controlled by the Democratic Party. Much of this is thanks to Donald Trump. Historically, presidents are unpopular in their first year. By the time the Virginia race rolls around in the next year, voters go for the person in the opposite party. But that didn’t happen the year after Putin put Trump in the White House. In fact, Democratic votes increased. But, Virginia may not be entirely blue just yet. It’s a tight race separated by three points in the polls (for McAuliffe) and Youngkin has a chance. His chances depend on the memories of Virginia voters. He’s hoping they don’t have any.

Candidates often speak to the extreme of their party during the primaries and pivot to the middle during the general election. They hope independent and moderates didn’t listen to them during the primaries and hope the extremist don’t during the general campaign. Youngkin is hoping Virginia voters don’t know he spoke for the lunatic fundamentalist zealot cultists during the primary.

During the primary to choose which maniac the GOP would select to face off against former governor Terry McAuliffe, Youngkin promised to “protect the life of every Virginia child, born and unborn.” Now, he’s scrubbed all that shit from his website while his super PAC continues to shower anti-choice extremists with cash.

Youngkin was caught on a hot mic explaining to supporters he can’t champion an anti-choice platform as it won’t sell in Virginia. He’s hoping to trick moderates to win the election and then the next morning go all, “Bleah bleah bleah, you voted for Greg Abbot Lite. BWAHAHAHAHA!”

Youngkin is hoping moderate voters are what Trump believes people who died fighting for their country are, “suckers.”

He was asked if he would defund Planned Parenthood and “take it to the abortionists.” His answer was, “”I’m going to be really honest with you. The short answer is in this campaign, I can’t. When I’m governor and I have a majority in the House we can start going on offense. But as a campaign topic, sadly, that in fact won’t win my independent votes that I have to get.”

In another video, he said, “We’re going after those middle one million voters who are, sadly, gonna decide this — have decided elections for the last 10 to 12 years in Virginia, and they’ve moved a bit away from us. We’re going to get them. We just got back a whole bunch of data today, and we’re winning this group. This is the group that we have to go get.”

He’ll get them by tricking them. Don’t let him fool you.

If he’s going to lie to you about his position on abortion, what else is he lying about? Is he lying about gun control, the vaccine, the pandemic, who won the election? Yes, yes, yes, and yes.

Anti-abortion zealots aren’t worried about his hot-mic snafu or lack of campaigning on ending abortion. They listened to him during the GOP’s fake primary. “He’s not being squishy because we already have him on record saying this stuff,” Don Blake, president of the Virginia Christian Alliance, told The Washington Post.

He’s assured evangelical voters he would “oppose laws that allow women to seek abortions,” according to the Richmond Times-Dispatch. That means he’s going to oppose laws that are on the books now. Don’t mess up by voting for this guy and then wonder later why Virginia has a bunch of Texas Taliban-style laws the majority of the population opposes.

He now says he’s “pro-life,” but he’s not an extremist fundamentalist like the yee-haw fuckers in Texas. He says he’s for banning abortions after the 20th week of pregnancy, not the sixth. But, has anyone asked him if he’ll veto a bill that is a duplicate of Texas’ that bans abortion after six weeks and basically outlaws abortion? Would he veto or sign a bill that creates bounties on abortion providers? Will he restore Jefferson Davis’ name to state highways? Will he return Robet E. Lee’s statue to Richmond? Will he make Trump’s birthday a state holiday? Will you soon fly into Richmond at Ivanka International Airport? Will he rename Virginia Beach to Proud Boy Beach? Will the state motto go from “Virginia is for lovers” to “Virginia is for lovers but only for conception?” Or, “Virginia is for lovers, even rapists who impregnate you?” Since his campaign website doesn’t have a page explaining where he stands on the issues, someone needs to ask him these questions.

Don’t forget, Ted Cruz campaigned with Youngkin during the primary. Where is Ted Cruz during the general election. For most people, never is when they want to be seen with Cancun Cruz, but for Youngkin, he found a time and place.

During the primary, he would not say Biden won the election and kept talking about “election integrity,” which isn’t a real thing for Republicans but a phrase they love to say. After the primary, he needed to focus on the general election and stop staying crazy shit. When asked if Biden is president, he said, “Of course! He’s our president. He slept in the White House last night. He’s addressed a Joint Session of Congress. He’s signing executive orders that I wish he wasn’t signing. So, let’s look forward and just recognize that what we have to do is lead.”

Still, did you notice what he did not say? He still didn’t say Biden won the election. Hey, reporters. Don’t ask him who is the president. Don’t ask him who’s sleeping in the White House. Ask him if Biden won the election. Ask him if it was stolen from Trump. Ask him about George Soros, Hugo Chavez, illegal voters, and Italian satellites. Ask him, ask him, ask him. Ask him if he wants to be endorsed by Ted Cruz, Marjorie Taylor Green, and Matt Gaetz. Tie him to the conspiracy-spreading zealots.

Ask him about Donald Trump’s endorsement. Virginia, do you want a guy endorsed by Trump?

During last night’s debate, Youngkin came out against vaccine mandates for teachers and health officials. He’s against corporations mandating their employees taking the vaccine. When asked by moderator Chuck Todd whether vaccinations for measles, mumps and rubella should be voluntary, Youngkin said, “I think the data associated with those vaccines is something we should absolutely understand the difference between this vaccine.” That’s word salad, not an answer.

Chuck asked him for a real answer and Youngkin said, “Those vaccines can be mandatory. I do believe the covid vaccine is one everyone should get but we shouldn’t mandate it.” Did that make sense to you?

We do know this: States with Republican governors are doing far worse with the pandemic. They’re also the worst for economic development and have the highest poverty rates. Youngkin is promising to slash taxes, even the 2.5 percent on groceries. What he’s really promising isn’t a cut to your grocery bill, but tax cuts for billionaires like himself. Youngkin will destroy Virginia’s economy and make it a haven for the coronavirus, much like Texas and Florida have become. I don’t want Virginia to be like Texas and Florida in any sort of way. I even root for the Washington Football Team over the Cowboys and Buccaneers.

Last night’s debate was the second and the last before the election in October. There was one other scheduled but Youngkin refused to participate because Judy Woodruff, the moderator, had contributed $250 to the Clinton Foundation’s earthquake relief efforts in Haiti over a decade ago. He was worried that someone with empathy for other people couldn’t be impartial to a Republican. He was also worried she might ask questions during the debate. Maybe like Trump, he’s afraid of women, especially smart ones. So, he went with Chuck Todd.

Youngkin opposed Biden’s coronavirus relief package. He’s also against an increase in the minimum wage to $15 from the current $7.25 in Virginia. He opposes paid family and medical leave. He opposes the state’s Medicaid expansion. He’s argued for increasing gun rights. And finally, he will ban abortions. His mouth doesn’t say it, but his pocketbook does. He’s been doling out campaign contributions to anti-choice zealots in basically every race in Virginia. He’s trying to become governor with a right-wing fundamentalist anti-choice General Assembly. He’ll probably combat climate change by banning woke actions that anger God.

The Washington Post has endorsed McAuliffe. They write that Glenn Youngkin “has played footsie with the scurrilously antidemocratic Big Lie” that Trumpers claim gave Biden the presidency. The Post mentioned Youngkin would roll back gun-safety laws and abortion access, equivocated on same-sex marriage, and called Medicaid expansion, which provided health insurance for hundreds of thousands of Virginians, “sad.”

The Post also writes, “In the current campaign, for which voting starts Friday and culminates Nov. 2, Mr. McAuliffe has proposed a sweeping, detailed agenda — a sharp contrast with Mr. Youngkin, who for months had almost no policy proposals beyond a commission to tighten rules on nearly nonexistent election fraud.”

The Post points out, “The McAuliffe plan’s centerpiece is a $2 billion investment in education, which dovetails with his pro-business agenda; good schools attract good businesses.”

They also mention as governor, McAuliffe made 35 trips overseas to bring businesses and jobs to Virginia, which included luring Nestlé USA to Roslyn from California and CoStar Group to move from North Carolina to Richmond. Maybe if you live in California or North Carolina, you don’t want Terry McAuliffe to return to Virginia’s governor mansion. When McAuliffe left office, our unemployment rate was at 3.6 percent, below the national average.

McAuliffe also restored felon voting rights and criminalized gun possession by domestic abusers. Take note if you live in NoVa, McAuliffe negotiated a massive, privately financed expansion in traffic-clogged Northern Virginia’s highway capacity.

By comparison, Younkin’s only positions have been to destroy progress and create “election integrity” for non-existent voter fraud.

The Post sums up with: “It’s critical that Virginians recall that Mr. McAuliffe is a dynamic chief executive with a proven track record for advancing prosperity. Mr. Youngkin is an untested politician who would guide the state away from the moderation it has pursued, and profited from, for more than a decade. Electing him would be a grave error.” Donald Trump was an untested politician too.

Electing Youngkin would be a huge error. It would be a disaster. Trumplicans are always disasters.

Youngkin is a Trumpkin, but if you don’t want to vote for McAullife and since the will be getting hot in October, vote for a pumpkin. It’s kinda the same thing when you look at Trump.

 

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