Bro Gary Hawkins 11: Bro likes his food

[samurai_sarah 11,924]

Carry on from here:

 

Edited July 30, 2019 by samurai_sarah

[keepercjr 7,280]

It’s GOD not my your’s or anyone else’s!

[Lillymuffin 9,618]

@Four is Enough I know this is from the last thread, but I kept forgetting to take a picture when I drove by. I had my cheapo, nasty-natty beers confused. Natty Boh was from my college days.  For your viewing pleasure, here is the special at one of our local (dive) watering holes: 

Every Natty might have a story, but none of them are good. 

[Alisamer 24,755]

Bro had to have had somebody proofread that first post up there. Or maybe he dictated it and speech-to-text did way better at spelling than he does.

I think I need to go back and read the story of Sodom and Gomorrah again, but what little I remember of it was essentially a guy saying "No, horny neighbors! Don't hit on my male guests! Here, rape my virgin daughters instead!" Which makes me think it's maybe not the best example to be using against something you consider a moral wrong. Especially since I'm pretty sure the Bible specifically says that homosexuality isn't what the cities were destroyed about.

[Black Aliss 15,677]

46 minutes ago, Alisamer said:

I think I need to go back and read the story of Sodom and Gomorrah again, but what little I remember of it was essentially a guy saying "No, horny neighbors! Don't hit on my male guests! Here, rape my virgin daughters instead!" Which makes me think it's maybe not the best example to be using against something you consider a moral wrong. Especially since I'm pretty sure the Bible specifically says that homosexuality isn't what the cities were destroyed about.

Ezekiel 16:48–50 :

Quote

Now this was the sin of your sister Sodom: She and her daughters were arrogant, overfed and unconcerned; they did not help the poor and needy. They were haughty and did detestable things before me. Therefore I did away with them as you have seen.

Note that it says nothing about butt-sex.

[thoughtful 34,781]

Since Sodom's sin was being inhospitable, I think this is the true "sodomite" flag:

[Lillymuffin 9,618]

31 minutes ago, thoughtful said:

Since Sodom's sin was being inhospitable, I think this is the true "sodomite" flag:

Oh, dear. We had a doormat that said that for years when I was growing up. Does that make me a sodomite? 🤣

[Ozlsn 18,079]

12 hours ago, thoughtful said:

Since Sodom's sin was being inhospitable, I think this is the true "sodomite" flag:

I think here it's a version of "f*** off, we're full" with a jingoistic background.

[Alisamer 24,755]

I'm seriously, seriously considering getting a doormat that says "Did you call first?" for both doors of my house. I'll help people all I can, but my house is small and my place to recover from having to be around people. Haven't been smited yet, so I guess it balances out?

It is a little ironic seeing people who are likely to go on about "illegals" and such and wanting most immigrants kept out using the same story that condemns exactly that to discriminate against LGBTQ+ people.

[SilverBeach 46,233]

2 minutes ago, Alisamer said:

I'm seriously, seriously considering getting a doormat that says "Did you call first?"

I will buy this. I do not answer the door when I'm not expecting anyone and cuss when, upon getting no response to the dooebell, folks beat on my door! Makes me livid!

[Granwych 18,531]

23 hours ago, thoughtful said:

Since Sodom's sin was being inhospitable, I think this is the true "sodomite" flag:

I would like a "reverse welcome" mat like this.

[Briefly 12,037]

9 hours ago, SilverBeach said:

I will buy this. I do not answer the door when I'm not expecting anyone and cuss when, upon getting no response to the dooebell, folks beat on my door! Makes me livid!

Because there have been more than a few break-ins by people who ring and then bust the door down when they don't get an answer, we always go to the door.  We might answer by yelling through the door instead of opening it, but we do at least acknowledge that we're home.

On another Gary note:  I was in Walmart today. There were two men in the line behind me.  They were buying at least 5 packages of hot dogs and that many (or more) baloney loaves.  I would say that they hadn't missed any meals, they were pretty large (not judging, just describing them) and all I could think of was dear old Gary!

[keepercjr 7,280]

1 hour ago, Briefly said:

Because there have been more than a few break-ins by people who ring and then bust the door down when they don't get an answer, we always go to the door.  We might answer by yelling through the door instead of opening it, but we do at least acknowledge that we're home.

On another Gary note:  I was in Walmart today. There were two men in the line behind me.  They were buying at least 5 packages of hot dogs and that many (or more) baloney loaves.  I would say that they hadn't missed any meals, they were pretty large (not judging, just describing them) and all I could think of was dear old Gary!

Yes the local police say to always answer the door, even if you just shout through it.  Getting nobody at the door is a good sign for criminals!  I help coordinate an annual neighborhood pot luck and a neighbor and I usually go around together to drop off invites.  Depending on how pressed for time we are, we might ring door bells or just leave them on the porch.  I have had several neighbors talk through closed doors to me and just direct me to leave the potluck invite on the porch.

 I believe that my big dog (and little dog) barking at the door is enough of a deterrent when we aren’t home though thank goodness.  Especially since I have older kids home alone sometimes and they know not to answer the door.

[thoughtful 34,781]

26 minutes ago, keepercjr said:

I believe that my big dog (and little dog) barking at the door is enough of a deterrent when we aren’t home though thank goodness.

Then you need John Donne's welcome mat:

I know -- poetry purists would want one that says "never send to know for whom the dog barks; it barks for thee." I guess they'd have to have one custom made.

[PumaLover 12,487]

Ok folks, I made vegetarian weens for dinner tonight. Bro would probably have a fit, assuming vegetarians are feminists, Trump haters, pants wearing, birth control using heathens (which I am).

I learned on Food Network to cut your ween so it can have maximum surface area to cook which in turn gives it texture! I topped mine with caramelized onions, cheddar, BBQ sauce, scallions and veggie bacon. You can certainly make it non vegetarian too.

Oh, and also toast the bun! This was something I also just recently learned!

[PumaLover 12,487]

OK folks sorry to double post (I think it might merge them) but this marks the first time in FJ history that I would eat what Bro has on his plate. This is actually appetizing and I'm wondering if he'll is fixin' to freeze over or something. 

[Walking Cat Bed 10,503]

12 hours ago, keepercjr said:

I believe that my big dog (and little dog) barking at the door is enough of a deterrent when we aren’t home though thank goodness.  Especially since I have older kids home alone sometimes and they know not to answer the door.

My apartment landing neighbors' dogs are VERY barky when they hear anyone. Like I can leave or enter my apartment without making much noise and they're on guard. (I say hi and call them sweeties, but haven't "met" them yet.) 

It's noisy, but I don't hate it.

[thoughtful 34,781]

Gary, it's nice to know you eat vegetables. But did you have to take a bite out of the corn before taking the photo?

ETA - I think we need a title change for this thread. Gary's eating fresh fruit and veggies should be celebrated! How about "Bro Gary Hawkins 11: From Ween to Lean, Green and Clean" (I know, as it happens, none of the veggies he's eating are green, but I couldn't resist the rhyme)?

Edited August 2, 2019 by thoughtful

[Alisamer 24,755]

That meal reminds me of the food we had growing up. We had a garden out back, and grew corn, squash, okra, green beans, tomatoes, cantaloupes, strawberries, etc. All summer we'd have home grown veggies, and can enough beans for year round. We did always have some meat item, if I remember right, though that wasn't always store-bought either (we had a dairy farm, but if a cow had to be put down for an injury or something, it didn't go to waste). I'm surprised there's no meat on his plate. 

Hey Gary - if you guys settled down somewhere, you could grow all that food yourself! Imagine, that whole meal, and many other similar ones, all for the cost of a few packs of seeds, a bit of fertilizer, and a bit of work.

I know, it's the "work" part that's the trouble, isn't it.

[Sobeknofret 1,983]

16 hours ago, thoughtful said:

Then you need John Donne's welcome mat:

I know -- poetry purists would want one that says "never send to know for whom the dog barks; it barks for thee." I guess they'd have to have one custom made.

We have this one! It's gotten a lot of laughs.

[Don'tlikekoolaid 16,195]

Words.  Bro Gary words.  

Spoiler

 

[Spinosaurus 1,114]

That... that's not...

That's not a thing.

[potato 2,456]

I saw a tweet about this and immediately thought of Bro Gary.  Introducing a ween ice cream sandwich!

 

[feministxtian 48,383]

2 hours ago, Don'tlikekoolaid said:

Words.  Bro Gary words.  

  Hide contents

 

Is that even English?

[Dandruff 47,472]

3 hours ago, feministxtian said:

Is that even English?

Bro is to grammar as antimatter is to matter.

5 hours ago, potato said:

I saw a tweet about this and immediately thought of Bro Gary.  Introducing a ween ice cream sandwich!

 

Do I want to try it?  Why, no.

But I think Bro would probably like it a lot.