Counting On Season 8/9/10 2: How low will they go? (CW: Miscarriage)

[Lurky]

23 hours ago, Cheetah said:

Yes!  I noticed this as well, and she spoke up more than she has in the past without looking like she'd rather be anywhere else than right there.  So whether it's growing up a bit, spending time with Kendra, being away from her other sisters, it was a good move.

The flipside is that it's another person who will leave her, emotionally, before she's even 15.  Joe and Kendra seem like the couple most genuinely into the family beliefs, so they could very easily end up with 3 under 3, 4 under 4, 5 under 5 etc, and there'll be no time for sisters-in-law, except as unpaid helpers to hand the babies over to.  And as the most enmeshed of the young couples, if they decide to move off the compound, that's another mother substitute leaving.

[Snarkasarus Rex]

The Duggars’ entertainment value (or any TLC show, really) has always been about their ‘freak factor’.  While they don’t  wear matching frumpers anymore, they’re still constantly reminding you of why they’re not like ‘regular’ people.  In that vein, TLC still paints them as simple, bumbling fools to emphasize their ‘freak factor’.  

And because money, Boob is totes ok with TLC making his kids (adult kids included) look like idiots. Ministry my ass...

 

[Lurky]

15 hours ago, Dominionatrix said:

Being known as a reliably bad cook has probably saved Jessa thousands of hours of unpaid, largely unappreciated work over the course of her life.

There's a strong disincentive to be considered good at an everyday skill in that sort of family, because then you're stuck cooking for 20 every single day or sewing the bridesmaids dresses for every wedding.

Co-signing this!  I always love that Jessa was raised to be the sweet, submissive hausfrau, and despite the beatings, the brainwashing and the lack of any kind of choices, still managed to resist so much of it.

[Audrey2]

Regarding the cake baking storyline, I would love to have seen a last minute entry to the contest... Ben and the Howlers. 

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

I caught part of the cake making and I was more than a little shocked at how small Jackson is, he looks like he's 10 not almost 15. He is obviously going to be one of the smaller boys, it is really evident when he's next to JoHanna who, at 13 is probably full grown, and looks to be a good 1/2 foot taller than him. 

Being a late blooming male sucks, I remember the boys in school who took forever to "catch up" to the girls. I was one of the youngest kids in my grade (there were only 4 younger than me and 2 of them skipped a grade), and one of the earliest bloomers, I got my period about a month before my 11th birthday and was 5'6" at 11 years old with DD boobs by the time I was 12 I stuck out like a sore thumb until Freshman year when most of the girls had caught up to me and sophomore year when most of the boys were finally taller than me. 

Anyway, the boys who didn't hit puberty until 15/16 were picked on a lot by kids who got there much sooner.  I guess he doesn't have to worry about it since he's home "schooled". 

[Four is Enough]

6 hours ago, nst said:

as for jessa - she won't ever conform - the fact that she still refers to herself as "us kids" and "duggar time" means she won't ever change to please us.

I dunno, at 60, 64, and 68, my siblings and I refer to ourselves as "we three" or "us three kids" . I'll go along with it..

[viii]

13 minutes ago, Four is Enough said:

I dunno, at 60, 64, and 68, my siblings and I refer to ourselves as "we three" or "us three kids" . I'll go along with it..

Same. We're 38, 35, and 33, and we call ourselves the kids. The actual kids, (3, 3, 3, and 11 months) get called the babies. 

[DarkAnts]

I watched the episode while I was at the ER for an allergic reaction. Some of the details are a bit fuzzy. I hope Lauren followed up with a doctor. No one deserves that kind of heart break. 

[SassyPants]

1 hour ago, Lurky said:

Co-signing this!  I always love that Jessa was raised to be the sweet, submissive hausfrau, and despite the beatings, the brainwashing and the lack of any kind of choices, still managed to resist so much of it.

Too bad she can’t resist the playing the imbecile  for easy money part. In that regard, she’s 100% Duggar.

[Mama Mia]

34 minutes ago, SassyPants said:

Too bad she can’t resist the playing the imbecile  for easy money part. In that regard, she’s 100% Duggar.

She’s not playing an imbecile. She’s playing the part of someone who hasn’t bothered to learn anything about baking because she gives zero fucks about it. I have no real interest in learning how to - for example -code a website, , and so I haven’t. That doesn’t make me an imbecile. There are a ton of skills I freely admit I don’t have now, and will likely never have. I’m completely ok with that. Jessa seems fine with no being able to bake. It’s hardly a big deal. She can buy a cake if her kid wants one. Or have her husband make it. Or participate in some silly contest either purely for show cash, or just as something to do with her siblings. 

I do think it was really, really telling that Jana not only made the cake, but redocorated it after the kids help wasn’t good enough, AND won the contest despite the cake not having the best taste. Whoever said “don’t mess with Jana” seemed to be right! Now I picture sweet, demure stay at home Jana ruling over that huge house with an iron fist- making ALL her siblings- and parents- carry out endless decorating projects to perfection- or else ?

[Cheetah]

I had a very cynical thought about the miscarriage coverage.  Maybe TLC did say, 'hey guys, it's entirely up to you whether or not we use that footage we shot last week of you announcing the pregnancy.  Your call.'   And then Josiah leaned a bit on Lauren to go ahead and be open about it presumably as part of their ministry or whatever but because he also in the back of his mind wanted to put the rumors about his sexuality to bed.  

Or maybe TLC really is just tone-deaf and low quality. 

[backyard sylph]

15 minutes ago, Mama Mia said:

She’s not playing an imbecile. She’s playing the part of someone who hasn’t bothered to learn anything about baking because she gives zero fucks about it. I have no real interest in learning how to - for example -code a website, , and so I haven’t. That doesn’t make me an imbecile. There are a ton of skills I freely admit I don’t have now, and will likely never have. I’m completely ok with that. Jessa seems fine with no being able to bake. It’s hardly a big deal. She can buy a cake if her kid wants one. Or have her husband make it. Or participate in some silly contest either purely for show cash, or just as something to do with her siblings. 

I do think it was really, really telling that Jana not only made the cake, but redocorated it after the kids help wasn’t good enough, AND won the contest despite the cake not having the best taste. Whoever said “don’t mess with Jana” seemed to be right! Now I picture sweet, demure stay at home Jana ruling over that huge house with an iron fist- making ALL her siblings- and parents- carry out endless decorating projects to perfection- or else ?

Her inability to even read instructions properly or understand when something is metric instead of Imperial is probably not an attribute you share. 

[SassyPants]

34 minutes ago, backyard sylph said:

Her inability to even read instructions properly or understand when something is metric instead of Imperial is probably not an attribute you share. 

And this was her job that day. I worked for 35 years and you can best believe that I was prepared for the tasks I needed to do. The days that I knew ahead of time that I would have a special role, like sitting on the ECMO machine (similar to a heart/ lung bypass), I made sure to be extra prepared. I don’t see why so many people here are quick to give the “ don’t give an EFF” a pass when this attitude is expressed with regards to their job. Sorry, give an EFF or find a different type of job. Personally, I think it’s more lack of skills and knowledge and less about not giving an EFF. Although, laziness also factors in.

[backyard sylph]

The not caring aspect is often something of a mask for lack of knowledge. It's oh lol me so dumb, whatever nevermind. 

And it certainly has little to do with representing for Jesus, etc. 

[SassyPants]

2 minutes ago, backyard sylph said:

The not caring aspect is often something of a mask for lack of knowledge. It's oh lol me so dumb, whatever nevermind. 

And it certainly has little to do with representing for Jesus, etc. 

Agreed, but how hard is it to look up a recipe, buy the correct ingredients, research anything that you may be unfamiliar with, and gather all the correct and necessary implements to complete your task for the day? Dollars to doughnuts, there’s a mixer or 2 in that huge Duggar storage unit. Not very cuious, interested or skilled,  and awfully lazy and entitled if you ask me. 

[backyard sylph]

10 minutes ago, SassyPants said:

Agreed, but how hard is it to look up a recipe, buy the correct ingredients, research anything that you may be unfamiliar with, and gather all the correct and necessary implements to complete your task for the day? Dollars to doughnuts, there’s a mixer or 2 in that huge Duggar storage unit. Not very cuious, interested or skilled,  and awfully lazy and entitled if you ask me. 

Yes, that's what initially bothered me, and honestly, she wasn't the only one who didn't know how to even read a recipe; my original complaint. The sisters-in-law had a better handle on things, Kendra even redid hers because she wasn't satisfied with it at first. Plus the Jboys weren't allowed to learn anything from it or having fun mixing, etc., but now I'm really repeating myself. 

I am pretty sure JD is one of the non-cake eaters, anyway, but I have wondered all along if some of them don't like cake because it was never a "Duggar thing" they got to experience freely.

[Mama Mia]

Just idle curiosity, and not to set off some endless wedding etiquette war - but are grooms cakes a common thing? I have some sort of hazy memory of my parents bringing home some sort of fruitcake? in a little box that may have been a grooms cake, from their friend’s wedding when I was a kid (incidentally, the only “ no kids” wedding in my recollection as well) - but other than that - I don’t think I’ve seen them at weddings I’ve been to. 

[tabitha2]

They are Fairly comment. Seen them at all The  weddings I have been to. 

[nvmbr02]

1 hour ago, Mama Mia said:

Just idle curiosity, and not to set off some endless wedding etiquette war - but are grooms cakes a common thing? I have some sort of hazy memory of my parents bringing home some sort of fruitcake? in a little box that may have been a grooms cake, from their friend’s wedding when I was a kid (incidentally, the only “ no kids” wedding in my recollection as well) - but other than that - I don’t think I’ve seen them at weddings I’ve been to. 

I've seen groom's cakes about about half the weddings I've been to. They don't seem to be popular on the west coast, at least not within my circle. But all of the weddings we have been to in the midwest and south have had a groom's cake.

In our family of 5, none of us really like cake. My younger two like it well enough but would never choose it over another desert. Me, my oldest and my husband generally skip desert if it is cake. Unless it is cheesecake, then that's another story. So I can totally relate to people not eating cake. 

[Whooping_Butt]

2 hours ago, Mama Mia said:

Just idle curiosity, and not to set off some endless wedding etiquette war - but are grooms cakes a common thing? I have some sort of hazy memory of my parents bringing home some sort of fruitcake? in a little box that may have been a grooms cake, from their friend’s wedding when I was a kid (incidentally, the only “ no kids” wedding in my recollection as well) - but other than that - I don’t think I’ve seen them at weddings I’ve been to. 

They’re more common in the south and parts of the Midwest. Wikipedia says they started in Victorian England because richer, denser cakes like fruitcake were seen as more masculine than lighter cakes iced in white. 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Groom's_cake?wprov=sfti1

A short, but interesting read.

And fruitcake is a traditional choice for groom’s cake, and slices are often sent home with guests. So it sounds like your parents did bring home groom’s cake. 

[livinginthelight]

I'm on the west coast and I've been to countless weddings and I've never heard of a groom's cake until now.

Actually these days it seems any wedding cake is rather optional. I've seen cupcakes and donuts recently.

[Lurky]

8 hours ago, SassyPants said:

And this was her job that day. I worked for 35 years and you can best believe that I was prepared for the tasks I needed to do. The days that I knew ahead of time that I would have a special role, like sitting on the ECMO machine (similar to a heart/ lung bypass), I made sure to be extra prepared. I don’t see why so many people here are quick to give the “ don’t give an EFF” a pass when this attitude is expressed with regards to their job. Sorry, give an EFF or find a different type of job. Personally, I think it’s more lack of skills and knowledge and less about not giving an EFF. Although, laziness also factors in.

I think you're fundamentally missing what this show was trying to do.  It wasn't going for a "Great British Bake Off" vibe, where everyone made beautiful cakes that tasted like angels made them., it wanted something more like "Nailed It!", where everyone but Jana messed things up.  This is a tactic we've seen the Duggar producers do over and over and over again, and I think the family goes along with it because they think they're seen as an ideal family, and want to show they're just like ordinary people, albeit quiverfull.

Even someone who has never seen an episode, and so doesn't know the pattern can see the clues:  the challenge is pointlessly difficult (I get why gluten free, because of Lauren, but why no sugar?) and they've clearly been given a really limited time to look things up on the web, because *even Jana* couldn't made an edible cake.  The parameters were half-arsed (I don't understand why, for example, sugar isn't allowed, but honey is - and Jana just flat out ignored that rule, with her fondant).  They clearly weren't given time to research, or access to cookery books or anything - because that would have made it more do-able.  And I kind of get why, because 4 stay at home mums who've been groomed all their lives for marriage and motherhood making nice but ordinary cakes would be even less compelling TV than this shower. 

Jessa's job was to be the bumbling one, and she did exactly what she was asked by the producers.  Her job was to do really badly, make people laugh, and make Jana and her sisters-in-law look better in comparison, and viewers who enjoy that kind of thing feel smug and superior.  Jana didn't even use the cake her siblings helped with, because she thought it wasn't good enough!   Using this episode as an example of Jessa's moral failings is like suggesting the English teacher isn't doing her job because she hasn't taught her class the periodic table.

(I've got to say, I'm completely confused about the outrage some FJers are having because Jessa doesn't bake - it feels like sexism to me, like all women have a duty to be able to bake and follow recipes.  Between her and Ben, the kids are fed, and more nutritiously than anyone in the TTH has been - so what's the problem?)

[kiwi]

Being known as a reliably bad cook has probably saved Jessa thousands of hours of unpaid, largely unappreciated work over the course of her life.
There's a strong disincentive to be considered good at an everyday skill in that sort of family, because then you're stuck cooking for 20 every single day or sewing the bridesmaids dresses for every wedding. 

I think shes probably pretty clued on and has wised up to this! How many bridesmaids dresses has Jana had to whip up or alter at the last minute? How many kids that arent her own has she had to raise?

[MaryOrMartha]

I have been to a my fair share of weddings [8 in the past 12 months ?] due to having quite a large extended family and many friends of marrying age. I have previously joked that I could be considered a professional wedding guest.

Despite this, I have only seen a grooms cake once. The groom is vegan, and I just figured his cake was due to his dietary restrictions.

Is it a recent trend that I can expect to see popping up more?

[QuiverFullofBooks]

1 hour ago, MaryOrMartha said:

Is it a recent trend that I can expect to see popping up more?

It’s an old-fashioned, Southern tradition, probably getting a bump in popularity right now because baking cakes and elaborate Pinteresty weddings are in fashion. (As are dietary restrictions, which having extra cakes can accommodate.) Remember the armadillo-shaped groom’s cake in Steel Magnolias?