Maxwell 26: The Toothbrush Thing Is Real

[Captain Obvious]

Glad that blog commentator pointed out that those Not Fake At All reviewing sons were younger than their own mother. With all that reproductive freedom, too many women are having children while they themselves are yet to be born. Or something.

[anjulibai]

55 minutes ago, Captain Obvious said:

Glad that blog commentator pointed out that those Not Fake At All reviewing sons were younger than their own mother. With all that reproductive freedom, too many women are having children while they themselves are yet to be born. Or something.

Wait, what? Where's this? 

BTW, they posted the "immediate" family pic. It's kind of strange how small it seems with just 4 kidults. I'm guessing that 2-3 years form now, it'll just be the 3 "girls" with Teri and Steve. 

Also, it's off center again. Because the Maxwells are incapable of properly centering a photograph. 

[Captain Obvious]

18 minutes ago, anjulibai said:

Wait, what? Where's this? 

In the book anniversary post. I mean - no shit, lady.

[Tatar-tot]

CREEPY......?

Is their fan base a bunch of creepers? Those comments are freaky.  I hope they are either from someone here bing sassy or the Ardnts.....If not, They have one weirdo fan base.

[fundiefan]

If I had 20-something sons, I'd be disappointed in their lives for writing something like that. 

[petrushka]

4 hours ago, Captain Obvious said:

In the book anniversary post. I mean - no shit, lady.

First thought was maybe the Frazer family, but I don't think they have 4 sons living at home anymore.  I agree this is too strange.

[lauraloralara]

5 hours ago, Captain Obvious said:

In the book anniversary post. I mean - no shit, lady.

I think it’s supposed to be a joke—each of the “kids” had their age posted, but “Mom” doesn’t want us to know how old she is, so she jokes by saying “older than them” as it could encompass a wide range of ages. Kind of like if she had posted “turning 40 this year for the 15th year in a row.” It’s a pretty lame joke.

[Captain Obvious]

6 minutes ago, lauraloralara said:

I think it’s supposed to be a joke—each of the “kids” had their age posted, but “Mom” doesn’t want us to know how old she is, so she jokes by saying “older than them” as it could encompass a wide range of ages. Kind of like if she had posted “turning 40 this year for the 15th year in a row.” It’s a pretty lame joke.

Oh yeah, I kind of figured that, it was just phrased weirdly. Which shouldn't be surprising, for a fan of the Maxwell style of writing.

[Palimpsest]

14 hours ago, Black Aliss said:

Given that they avoid the ebil news media, they may well not be aware of the e.coli outbreak and romaine recall.

Yeah, that was my thought.  I'm enough of a Good Person (although not a Christian) to hope that Aldi had removed any romaine from the shelves.  Even I don't like the thought of the Maxhellions chowing down on E. Coli due to their deliberate ignorance of current day events.

But imagine Teri's distress at the change in plans. "What no romaine?  Should I buy another head of iceberg or will something completely alien and unChristian like arugula, spinach, or kale do?  Let us all pray about it!" 

[church_of_dog]

34 minutes ago, Captain Obvious said:

Oh yeah, I kind of figured that, it was just phrased weirdly. Which shouldn't be surprising, for a fan of the Maxwell style of writing Maxwell fake-commenting on their own blog.

Fixed that for you.

[anachronistic]

5 lbs. of potatoes. For 20 people. That’s like, a tablespoon each.

We had 10lbs. yesterday for 7 people, and I’m going to try and waffle the leftovers today.

Maxwells had 2 desserts - for 20 people. We had 5 for 7. 

I may be an evil, atheist, liberal lesbian but at least when I invite people over for a meal they get to eat until they are full. I wonder if the Maxwells even understand their bodies well enough to know when they are hungry, when they are full, when they crave a particular food or taste. Or maybe it is all so scheduled, portioned out and careful that they feel something in their bodies and ignore it because they can’t be hungry, it’s not on the schedule. They can’t want more, they’ve had their allotted ration already.

 

[Granwych]

14 hours ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

I read this as orgasms and wondered what the heck I missed.  

Well, you just know that any orgasms except those resulting in blessings (aka babies) are nasty, and in women, totally unnecessary.

I think that I would be rolling on the floor laughing if I ever read anything by Stevehovah that included the word "orgasms."  And then, of course, I wouldn't believe he'd written it!

[Black Aliss]

6 hours ago, anachronistic said:

5 lbs. of potatoes. For 20 people. That’s like, a tablespoon each.

We had 10lbs. yesterday for 7 people, and I’m going to try and waffle the leftovers today.

Maxwells had 2 desserts - for 20 people. We had 5 for 7. 

I may be an evil, atheist, liberal lesbian but at least when I invite people over for a meal they get to eat until they are full. I wonder if the Maxwells even understand their bodies well enough to know when they are hungry, when they are full, when they crave a particular food or taste. Or maybe it is all so scheduled, portioned out and careful that they feel something in their bodies and ignore it because they can’t be hungry, it’s not on the schedule. They can’t want more, they’ve had their allotted ration already.

 

I think the Maxwells and the Rodriguii are so unaccustomed to the feeling of being comfortably full that they no longer notice. Of  course the Max's can fill up on mochas between meals. They just don't have very balanced diets.

And I'm willing to bet that the extended family, with the exception of the ones who live within Steve's field of vision, either go out for pizza when they leave the fathership, eat before they show up at the fathership, or make popcorn when they arrive home.

[nelliebelle1197]

Five pounds of potatoes. I just cannot get over that.

[Rosie]

On 11/22/2018 at 12:50 PM, Palimpsest said:

Oh, well.  I'm sitting here twiddling my fingers because I did all the prep yesterday and the turkey is in the oven.   I have a few more things I have to do after a couple of guests get here and before we eat but no worries.

We are having:

• turkey
• gravy (still needs to be made)
• homemade orange cranberry sauce 
• 2 kinds of stuffing, one vegetarian (both made outside turkey)
• mashed potato casserole (warming through in crockpot)
• sauteed green beans with almonds (last minute)
• roasted mixed veggie tray all cut up ready to roast when the turkey comes out (honey nut squash, brussels sprouts, asparagus) 
• salad (green with spinach, peppers, green onion, and tomatoes)
• "Relish tray"  no-one eats it but it is tradition.
• Apple pie
• Ice cream

Guests are bringing various nibbles and another pie.  And we will load them up with left-overs when they leave.  It is way too much food.

I'm still shocked that the Maxwells don't make stuffing and their only green veggies are in that terrible sounding salad.  I hope they know that romaine lettuce should be off the menu this year.   https://www.cdc.gov/ecoli/2018/o157h7-11-18/index.html

And Teri claims that serves 25!   

As I peeled five pounds of potatoes yesterday to serve eight people with plans for some, but not that many leftovers, I remembered that Teri remark about the same amount serving 20 people in their house.

WTH.

[samurai_sarah]

56 minutes ago, Rosie said:

As I peeled five pounds of potatoes yesterday to serve eight people with plans for some, but not that many leftovers, I remembered that Teri remark about the same amount serving 20 people in their house.

WTH.

Says a lot about your cooking, compared to hers... 

[anjulibai]

Oh Maxwells, you are such liars. They finally posted a Mom's corner for November, but they backdated it to the 8th. 

Self-righteous holier-than-thou snobs lie with impunity while condemning anyone that doesn't believe as they do. Seriously, lying is the fundie's favorite sin. 

[Dandruff]

12 hours ago, Palimpsest said:

But imagine Teri's distress at the change in plans. "What no romaine?  Should I buy another head of iceberg or will something completely alien and unChristian like arugula, spinach, or kale do?  Let us all pray about it!"

Maybe they had some in the freezer.  Wouldn't put it past them and I doubt it would substantially affect the quality of the "salad".

[Tangy Bee]

Assuming they don't do buffets?

[SassyPants]

I am really surprised that Steve hasn't put the kibosh on the girls' mocha, caramel, latte obsessions. I hesitate to express this as I'm sure Steve would love nothing more than to suck that only bit of Joy out of Mary and Anna's existence, but damn, those girls should not talk so much about those sugary drinks or ice cream. Steve is like the Grinch. At least Sarah has her dog...

Maybe if the girls had healthy food in appropriate quantities, they wouldn't be jonesing for the sugary crap (and caffeine).

[LilMissMetaphor]

It is kinda weird that Sarah picked random body parts to be grateful for.  She is specifically grateful for eyes, ears, and legs? Is she not also happy that she has a mouth that talks? A nose that smells? How does she feel about having two functional arms? 

Also, one would think they would've ironed those potato sacks jean skirts before taking full body shots with them.  

[OhNoNike]

1 hour ago, SassyPants said:

I am really surprised that Steve hasn't put the kibosh on the girls' mocha, caramel, latte obsessions. I hesitate to express this as I'm sure Steve would love nothing more than to suck that only bit of Joy out of Mary and Anna's existence, but damn, those girls should not talk so much about those sugary drinks or ice cream. Steve is like the Grinch. At least Sarah has her dog...

Maybe if the girls had healthy food in appropriate quantities, they wouldn't be jonesing for the sugary crap (and caffeine).

I’ve had the same thoughts!  They sure seem to enjoy those things. 

[nastyhobbitses]

18 hours ago, SassyPants said:

I am really surprised that Steve hasn't put the kibosh on the girls' mocha, caramel, latte obsessions. I hesitate to express this as I'm sure Steve would love nothing more than to suck that only bit of Joy out of Mary and Anna's existence, but damn, those girls should not talk so much about those sugary drinks or ice cream. Steve is like the Grinch. At least Sarah has her dog...

Maybe if the girls had healthy food in appropriate quantities, they wouldn't be jonesing for the sugary crap (and caffeine).

I've wondered this too. Those drinks are liquid diabetes; I'm really honestly shocked that Steve lets them have that and hasn't forced them to only drink Folgers black or something. Maybe they blackmailed Steve? Let us have our lattes or we write and illustrate The Moodys Reveal The Horrors Of The Abusive Family Cult In Which They Were Raised. 

[Melissa1977]

On the topic of mochas, I don't think it's as unhealthy as said. I mean, yes, those are suggary and it's not good, but probably it's the only sugar they take daily. Considering their weird food control, probably they don't eat cookies, yogourts, juices, ice creams etc, they *just* take 1 sugar dose with their mochas. Other people drink black coffee without sugar but eat sweets/cakes or drink juices or coke or processed sauces. Or alcoholic drinks. Or go to Starbucks before going to work.

I'm not a sugar defender at all. But I think a young, healthy person can have a sweet drink and not feel guilty. Especially if they are stuck at home and it's their only pleasure.

Pepsi was forbidden. Mochas will be forbidden too, and it's sad.

[OhNoNike]

3 hours ago, Melissa1977 said:

On the topic of mochas, I don't think it's as unhealthy as said. I mean, yes, those are suggary and it's not good, but probably it's the only sugar they take daily. Considering their weird food control, probably they don't eat cookies, yogourts, juices, ice creams etc, they *just* take 1 sugar dose with their mochas. Other people drink black coffee without sugar but eat sweets/cakes or drink juices or coke or processed sauces. Or alcoholic drinks. Or go to Starbucks before going to work.

I'm not a sugar defender at all. But I think a young, healthy person can have a sweet drink and not feel guilty. Especially if they are stuck at home and it's their only pleasure.

Pepsi was forbidden. Mochas will be forbidden too, and it's sad.

I think what I have in my head is the recipe Sarah posted here: https://blog.titus2.com/2017/09/15/easy-homemade-chocolate-syrup-for-mochas/

I absolutely don’t want to pick on her because I think adults are entitled to have a drink like that if they want (and I don’t think anyone on FJ wants her to lose one of the only joys she has in life.......besides Jesus).