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Josh Harris Announced "I Kissed Dating Goodbye" Was Discontinued


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Antipatriarch

Josh posted an Instagram "story" (those expire in 24 hours); it appears he went to a Pride parade, and had a rainbow-colored donut. This could be like straight Christians sometimes go to a Pride event holding up signs that say "I'm sorry". Or it could be something more personal for Josh. Time will tell; I think it's clear either way that he isn't going to hide his support for LGBT going forward.

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I just have to say that it seems like there is nothing he can do to make some people happy now. Whatever he does, the goalposts move.  First it was "Josh Harris needs to apologize". He did. So it

Yes.  I think that was a handsome and comprehensive apology from Joshua, especially to women and the LGBTQ+ community.  He does seem to have had a real epiphany.  I respect that.  I don't think he was

I have been following this and now: an update! (He also says the documentary film will be released next year) https://joshharris.com/statement/ [full statement]   This is wild to cons

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Palimpsest
50 minutes ago, Antipatriarch said:

Time will tell; I think it's clear either way that he isn't going to hide his support for LGBT going forward.

If it is real support and not exploitation.  Nothing is more likely to get him attention than going to a Pride parade.  I expect the Reformed crowd is going berserk damning him to hell.  He apparently craves all attention even, or especially, negative attention.

I'm taking bets now.  Is the title of his next book going to be:

  1. I Kissed Christianity Goodbye?
  2. I Kissed Heterosexuality Goodbye?
  3. I Kissed Christianity and Heterosexuality Goodbye?

I think the odds are against #3.  He'll want a two book deal.

 

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acheronbeach
1 hour ago, Antipatriarch said:

Josh posted an Instagram "story" (those expire in 24 hours); it appears he went to a Pride parade, and had a rainbow-colored donut. 

Lucky's has a tradition of serving rainbow donuts every year at Van Pride.  Everyone and their mother shares them on social media. 

That said, I agree... this is a very interesting turn for Josh.  Is one of his family coming out? Is he?  Has he just been exposed to the liberal heathen godlessness of Vancouver for too long?

Edited by acheronbeach
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DarkAnts

I agree with others who have said that Josh needs to back away from social media for awhile. At this point, it looks like he is just saying "look at how woke I am."

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louisa05
6 hours ago, dripcurl said:

I grew up in a charismatic denomination and was very involved in it’s local culture, and my husband grew up in a notorious charismatic megachurch in the area. (In fact, it was a gal at my church that first gave me IKDG.) Anyway, he and I both have noticed in these type of fundie-light circles that matches in general are encouraged, and age differences seem to be a non issue, as well as role differences: It is not uncommon to see a Youth Leader (not necessarily a Pastor) start going out or flirting with a teen and then making it more “official” once that teen is graduated.

I'm aware. Here's a story: a youth pastor at that same friend's church got caught in an inappropriate relationship with a 16 year old during the time I was working at the Christian school in that city. He was around 30. After meeting with the senior pastor and members of the church board, her parents and everyone involved agreed that the best thing to do was have the youth pastor buy the girl a ring and they would get married as soon as she turned 18. So that's what happened. 

A good ten years later, a story came out in the local paper that an associate pastor at a church in a neighboring state had been arrested for assaulting a 16 year old girl in his church. They carried it in the local paper because he had ties to the city. 

Did you guess already that it was the same guy? Now married to his earlier victim with three kids and doing it all again. 

That whole saga was part of what made my friend leave that church and eventually leave Christianity all together. She was raised in it all, homeschooled, everything. They can leave. 

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JanasTattooParlor

The whole youth pastor and teenager thing has always skeeved me out. The youth pastor at my Baptist church when I was a teen was in his forties and was married but he gave me such creepy vibes. I remember voicing it to my parents and they dismissed it thinking I was just trying to get out of going to church. Apparently telling teen girls they’re beautiful and that they’d be great for the young men in the youth group while simultaneously touching their shoulder or their hair isn’t creepy but damn if me and one of my guy friends at the time didn’t think so. I never returned to the church once I started college so I have no idea if he’s still even there, but I really hope not. 

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louisa05
9 hours ago, JanasTattooParlor said:

The whole youth pastor and teenager thing has always skeeved me out. The youth pastor at my Baptist church when I was a teen was in his forties and was married but he gave me such creepy vibes. I remember voicing it to my parents and they dismissed it thinking I was just trying to get out of going to church. Apparently telling teen girls they’re beautiful and that they’d be great for the young men in the youth group while simultaneously touching their shoulder or their hair isn’t creepy but damn if me and one of my guy friends at the time didn’t think so. I never returned to the church once I started college so I have no idea if he’s still even there, but I really hope not. 

The youth pastors that came in to speak in Christian school chapel were almost all creepy in some way. It was the mid to late 90s and during that time, most of them in the city had mysteriously concluded that skateboard culture was the way to appeal to teens. So they were grown men, usually in their 30s or 40s, in full 90s skateboarder mode.  The ones who didn't adopt that had their own weird vibes. One was about 45 and trying to look like he was from the cast of 90210. Another came in once with three guys from the church worship band and they tried to be a boy band for all of chapel. They all tried to use teenage slang and stuff like that and ended up sounding ridiculous. And they were, in general, much too involved in the lives of these teenagers--in ways that crossed lines. 

Our kids found them inauthentic in general. We had an assembly once with the guy who is now the head football coach at the University of Nebraska. He was the former QB there and playing in the NFL at the time. He was wearing khakis and a New York Jets polo shirt, talked like an adult and shared a genuine story that wasn't exaggerated for dramatic effect like the youth pastors quite obviously did all the time. Back in class, I asked the kids what they thought about him and one of them (who was not at all a Nebraska football fan) summed it up like this: "It was really nice to have an adult come in and look and act like an adult. I could take him seriously". I wished I had had it on video to show to every youth pastor who walked in the door. 

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MamaJunebug

Youth pastors - we never belonged to congregations large enough to have one, and despite the horrible relationship between me and my ex, the JuniorJB’s have - thank God - turned out all right. 

Slight detour in topic:  

I now have a vague respect for the guy from HGTV’s Home Town, Ben Napier. His dad AND mom were preachers, so he’s not patriarchal. I just get annoyed with him and his wife Erin’s Constant Clinging To Each Other.

But I digress; to my point: Ben started his working life as youth pastor at their United Methodist Church in their small Mississippi town.  With a degree in history, hunh?? BUT, he felt himself “aging out”’ of the job/calling as he reached age 30 and resigned honorably.  

Then lucked into a gig that will make it unnecessary for his grandchildren’s Children  to be job-type people, but again I digress.

So, my grudging point:  He seems to have been what a youth pastor  should be.  If a congregation is gonna have one.

I guess.

 

 

Edited by MamaJunebug
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louisa05
1 minute ago, MamaJunebug said:

Youth pastors - we never belonged to congregations large enough to have one, and despite the horrible relationship between me and my ex, the JuniorJB’s have - thank God - turned out all right. 

Slight detour in topic:  

I now have a vague respect for the guy from HGTV’s Home Town, Ben Napier. His dad AND mom were preachers, so he’s not patriarchal. I just get annoyed with him and his wife Erin’s Constant Clinging To Each Other.

But I digress; to my point: Ben started his working life as youth pastor at their United Methodist Church in their small Mississippi town.  With a degree in history, hunh?? BUT, he felt himself “aging out”’ of the job/calling as he reached age 30 and resigned honorably.  

Then lucked into a gig that will make jobs unnecessary for his grandchildren’s Children  to be job-type people, but again I digress.

He seems to have been what a youth pastor  should be.  If a congregation is gonna have one.

I guess.

 

 

A good friend of mine was a UMC youth pastor for awhile after college graduation. He looked and acted like an adult, too. He also left for a better job by the time he was 30. I think the pay is an issue for a lot of people in those roles, too. He was in a smaller congregation in a smaller town. Once he was married and they wanted to have kids, it wasn't a viable choice. 

But the big mega church ones that were coming into the school were clearly well paid. They could afford all the latest teen trends and all that, after all. 

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Walking Cat Bed

My actively in church years saw a few youth pastors. The most helpful were either under 30 and very careful about how they interacted with teenagers or older but like an additional parent. The established, clear boundary helped kids feel safe. The dudebros at Baptist College who wanted to be youth pastors so they could get paid to goof off didn't last long (but still volunteer so they can feel young).

"My" previous youth pastor has been the church's senior pastor for 15 years. 

 

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hoipolloi
4 hours ago, louisa05 said:

"It was really nice to have an adult come in and look and act like an adult. I could take him seriously".

Maybe things have changed since I was a teenager, but we loved having real adults who were not our parents pay attention to us and take US seriously, but without the judgement and hectoring that parents usually dished out. If they were kinda cool, so much the better. 

A reasonable and real adult offered validation that no kid could provide another kid.

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Howl
On 8/4/2019 at 3:08 AM, DarkAnts said:

I am now getting adds for Roosevelt's Terrariums. I keep telling the add thing no. I can go to my local nursery here in Salem and get the same service for 1/4 of the cost.

The first terrariums were Wardian cases.  I came across their early use in a book called For All the Tea in China: How England Stole the World's Favorite Drink and Changed History

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Marmion
21 hours ago, JanasTattooParlor said:

The whole youth pastor and teenager thing has always skeeved me out. The youth pastor at my Baptist church when I was a teen was in his forties and was married but he gave me such creepy vibes. I remember voicing it to my parents and they dismissed it thinking I was just trying to get out of going to church. Apparently telling teen girls they’re beautiful and that they’d be great for the young men in the youth group while simultaneously touching their shoulder or their hair isn’t creepy but damn if me and one of my guy friends at the time didn’t think so. I never returned to the church once I started college so I have no idea if he’s still even there, but I really hope not. 

Apparently , and unfortunately , this sort of thing is not isolated .  

- starting at 7:50

Edited by Marmion
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CyborgKin

Oh it's the kid whose first MCU movie he watched was Endgame!

I haven't seen any of his other material.

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theotherelise

I've tried to follow this without skimming, but apologies if it has already been posted. The Gospel Coalition bros also released a statement about Harris' deconversion: https://www.thegospelcoalition.org/article/reflections-josh-harris-deconversion/

I especially noted this part:

Quote

Corporately, it’s too simplistic to take one defection and say, “See, that’s what’s wrong with X.” The problem is X is usually in the eye of the beholder. In this case it could be: homeschooling, fame at a young age, Neo-Calvinism, the charismatic movement, purity culture, Sovereign Grace, lack of a seminary education, or all of the above. Or none of the above. People are shaped by thousands of moments and make their decisions for hundreds of reasons. The logic that says “this bad thing is the result of this cultural phenomenon I don’t like” is an argument easily made and impossibly refuted.

How convenient that you don't need to do any reflection because apparently you think it's futile to look at deeper causes. This is one of the main reasons why the "young, reformed, and restless" crowd is so infuriating to me. They write the rules, dictate the discussion, and condemn any other voices outside their own. Any disagreement is portrayed as "not of the gospel" and it basically amounts to a holy circle jerk. 

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hoipolloi

Re: that TGC statement. As if we need more proof of the utter narcissism which drives these men:

Quote

Our primary takeaway is that in years past our tribe was too quick to elevate gifted men who may not have had enough time to prove themselves faithful for the long haul.

Yeah, right.

Gifted men with little or no education, no pastoral experience, and who all perpetrated or tolerated abuse in the churches they run.

What a bunch of fucking asshats. May they spend eternity in the hellfire they love to think awaits "non-believers."

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refugee
13 hours ago, CyborgKin said:

Oh it's the kid whose first MCU movie he watched was Endgame!

I haven't seen any of his other material.

I think he might be the guy who did a parody of how to write the perfect worship song. He looks familiar (and Blimey Cow sounds familiar). We found him quite amusing and even a little edgy when we were still fundies. Don't know what I'd think of him nowadays. My definition of "edgy" is quite different from what it used to be.

Edit: Yes, he's the one. We used to watch "Messy Mondays" on a regular basis. Looking at the titles, I see one called "How being a people-pleaser is destroying your life." My kids (and I) could really have used that one...

 

Edited by refugee
went looking for an old memory
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refugee
20 hours ago, Marmion said:

Apparently , and unfortunately , this sort of thing is not isolated .  

Wow. I just watched the video. I think he actually gave sound advice. I'm amazed. (Shows me what a low opinion I have of christians in general these days.)

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MamaJunebug

I laugh - but I cry. 

There are so many hymns that comfort, inspire, teach and encourage. Not to mention those that praise and provide framework for one’s Thoughts in dedicating one’s Life to goodness. 

I wasn’t raised on praise songs, so I don’t know - do they help carry a person thru life’s ups & downs?  When one Jr.JB was critically ill, I clung to my old hymnal for prayers when prayers wouldn’t come. 

The Junior recovered miraculously, srsly.

i feel badly for folks coming up thru praise church today, as far as music. 

Edited by MamaJunebug
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hoipolloi
2 hours ago, MamaJunebug said:

I wasn’t raised on praise songs, so I don’t know - do they help carry a person thru life’s ups & downs?...i feel badly for folks coming up thru praise church today, as far as music

So do I. One of the saddest stories I've heard came from an old friend of my parents. 

A lifelong member of her Lutheran church in my hometown, she was on the committee in the 1960s that raised funds for a beautiful, German- or Swiss-made pipe organ which was installed & played, with great pride, for many years.

It served them for decades, providing a beautiful music, until a new young pastor, believing that no one wanted to hear pipe organs these days, had it dismantled to make way for a stage for the "praise band."

Seriously. WTAF.

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MamaJunebug
2 hours ago, hoipolloi said:

served them for decades, providing a beautiful music, until a new young pastor, believing that no one wanted to hear pipe organs these days, had it dismantled to make way for a stage for the "praise band."

 Seriously. WTAF.

I just lost my appetite. For a day. 

Do you have any idea how the congregation is doing at this point?  Membership numbers up? Down? Is “Lutheran” still in the church name?

One of the oldest congregations in suburban St. Louis is in a suburb that had been a farming town for decades before urban sprawl brought in yuppie prosperity.  I’m told they changed their name from Saint John’s Lutheran to “Pathways Church.”  This  cracks me up because one of the best new-age, witchy and psychic supply stores in St. Louis is also Pathways. 

I’ve never looked up the church to confirm or deny the name change, because right now the scenarios of people going to one or the other by mistake have me giggling. Almost giggling enough to forget the death of a pipe organ in a (historically) Lutheran Church. But not enough. Sad.

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hoipolloi
3 hours ago, MamaJunebug said:

Do you have any idea how the congregation is doing at this point?  Membership numbers up? Down? Is “Lutheran” still in the church name?

It still seems to be "in business," so to speak, as an Evangelical Lutheran Church of America (ELCA).

They are affiliated with a regional synod of the ELCA and the congregation is large enough to support two services on Sundays -- a traditional ELCA one at 8 and a "contemporary" one at 10.

 

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