Maxwell 25: Pies, Cakes, Tarts, and Tortes

[HerNameIsBuffy]

20 minutes ago, Lisafer said:

My goodness, for some reason I thought Ellie was already pregnant! So she hasn't even had sweet fellowship yet? Are the male dogs having trouble with the courtship questionnaire?

 

12 minutes ago, HereticHick said:

they haven't acquired a debt-free doghouse yet

I love this thread!

[Sequoia]

Should we be placing bets on whether they had Ellie spayed? Would they realize that eliminates the possibility of breeding?

[SPHASH]

37 minutes ago, Sequoia said:

Should we be placing bets on whether they had Ellie spayed? Would they realize that eliminates the possibility of breeding?

They probably think Ellie could have a reversal.

[PennySycamore]

They may not realize that even boys dogs can't have a reversal.  There's a reason that they make Neuticles.  Some humans can't bear to have their male dogs not look intact.  The guy dogs themselves:  they don't care!

[HerNameIsBuffy]

Why is he okay with talking about his genitals so freely?  Doesn't he see it as defrauding, or nike, or whatever?

I mean his women can't wear contrasting buttons, but he can openly discuss the composition of his ejaculate?  

Doesn't modesty dictate that's a sacred offering for Teri only, to be kept a mystery for the rest of the world?

I mean honestly I think more about testicles in this thread than at any other point in my life, most days.

[AllisonWndrland]

16 minutes ago, HerNameIsBuffy said:

Why is he okay with talking about his genitals so freely?  Doesn't he see it as defrauding, or nike, or whatever?

1

I think Steve likes to talk about his genitals, frankly. I can think of no other valid reason to bring up the status of his testicles during a wedding.

ETA: Count me in the camp of folks thinking Ellie was expecting. Sarah's website made it sound as though puppies would be here in November or so. 

[freethemall]

New tits2 post about fall. That's all ?

[Lisafer]

50 minutes ago, AllisonWndrland said:

I think Steve likes to talk about his genitals, frankly. I can think of no other valid reason to bring up the status of his testicles during a wedding.

 

I think you're right. He just likes to talk about his genitals. Steve, not one of the men in my life would publicly discuss their ejaculate the way you do. It's creepy. 

[usmcmom]

6 hours ago, anjulibai said:

I don't see an ETA on Sarah's puppy website anymore (used to be summer and then fall, I think), just that they are waiting for Ellie to go into heat. 

I think Ellie needs to accept her fate. She is a young female being raised in the Steve Maxwell home. She will not have a family. 

I suspect, though, that Arnold ( being a male, ya know) has purchased a fixer upper cat condo and is going to rent it until he finds a godly option for a female mate. It will be a no touch catship...I mean...courtship. 

Ellie will be on standby to care for Arnold's offspring and will help Mrs. Arnold make salmon burritos while she waits for the arrival of her blessings. Arnold's first male offspring will be named Catthew Scratchwell.  The females will be Kitty Elizabeth, CATherine Elizabeth and Meowry Elizabeth. 

They will not be allowed to play with string because string makes Steve think of bikinis. They will, however, get ten minutes of play time per day during which they may climb on giant Costco boxes and/or chase dirty Dairy Queen cups. 

You read it here first. 

[HereticHick]

I hope the kittens at least get 30-minutes per week scheduled to sit in the Samaritan's Purse Shoeboxes.

 

PS Beans can be used as a substitute in salmon burritos. The Arnold family will never notice, I'm sure.

[PennySycamore]

@usmcmom, that fixer upper cat condo will be even more of a fixer upper if Arnold isn't fixed.  And frankly so will the Maxwell house.  Unneutered tomcat  pee STINKS like few things do.  I do wonder if it would have shiplap walls though. 

[usmcmom]

Just now, PennySycamore said:

@usmcmom, that fixer upper cat condo will be even more of a fixer upper if Arnold isn't fixed.  And frankly so will the Maxwell house.  Unneutered tomcat  pee STINKS like few things do.  I do wonder if it would have shiplap walls though. 

Ack! We had a male kitten spray a week before his neutering appoointment. Thankfully, when I called about it, the vet agreed to board him until they could perform the surgery. You are right; that pee is a horrid smell. 

[mango_fandango]

I think they said in a comments section somewhere that Arnold has been fixed. No kittens for him.

I swear the website originally implied that Ellie was already pregnant, and due in the fall?? And now she’s not even had sweet fellowship??

[Lisafer]

16 minutes ago, mango_fandango said:

I think they said in a comments section someImwhere that Arnold has been fixed. No kittens for him.

I swear the website originally implied that Ellie was already pregnant, and due in the fall?? And now she’s not even had sweet fellowship??

I'm thinking they tried to breed her and it didn't take. They've definitely tweaked the wording on the site. Maybe god is not blessing Ellie because she gave away a piece of her heart to some mutt down the street...

[HereticHick]

30 minutes ago, mango_fandango said:

I swear the website originally implied that Ellie was already pregnant, and due in the fall?? And now she’s not even had sweet fellowship??

Born again Virgin!

 

PS Maybe Ellie's contrasting collar is distracting godly male dogs from focusing on her countenance.

[PennySycamore]

Her countenance is not what male dogs need to be focusing on for Ellie to get pregnant.

[DooDahDame]

The website I just saw is still stating “late summer/early fall”. I wonder if they are holding off because there were no buyers for puppies, or none meeting her criteria. I assume the buyers would have to be the right kind of Christians.

[Lisafer]

34 minutes ago, DooDahDame said:

 I wonder if they are holding off because there were no buyers for puppies, or none meeting her criteria. I assume the buyers would have to be the right kind of Christians.

Oh no, not at all. You just have to have money. Sarah assumes that if you are willing to plunk down cash for one of her puppies, you will take good care of it.

[Black Aliss]

9 hours ago, anjulibai said:

I don't see an ETA on Sarah's puppy website anymore (used to be summer and then fall, I think), just that they are waiting for Ellie to go into heat. 

I am starting to think they've tried to breed her a couple times but the Lord has closed Ellie's womb.

[JermajestyDuggar]

Omg I LIVE for cat puns. This thread has made my day. 

No touch catship. Dead.

[Hane]

3 hours ago, Lisafer said:

Oh no, not at all. You just have to have money. Sarah assumes that if you are willing to plunk down cash for one of her puppies, you will take good care of it.

I once met a woman and her gorgeous yellow lab, who was a certified therapy dog. The dog had had puppies a couple of months ago, so her nipples were still protruding (and my four-month-old pup trotted over to her and latched on). The woman told me that her dog had had three large litters and that she sold the pups for $1500 each—but insisted on home visits with the prospective owners before agreeing to finalize a sale. 

[PennySycamore]

@Hane,  I think that's sweet that your puppy latched on to that mama dog!

[erunerune]

14 hours ago, usmcmom said:

I think Ellie needs to accept her fate. She is a young female being raised in the Steve Maxwell home. She will not have a family. 

I suspect, though, that Arnold ( being a male, ya know) has purchased a fixer upper cat condo and is going to rent it until he finds a godly option for a female mate. It will be a no touch catship...I mean...courtship. 

Ellie will be on standby to care for Arnold's offspring and will help Mrs. Arnold make salmon burritos while she waits for the arrival of her blessings. Arnold's first male offspring will be named Catthew Scratchwell.  The females will be Kitty Elizabeth, CATherine Elizabeth and Meowry Elizabeth. 

They will not be allowed to play with string because string makes Steve think of bikinis. They will, however, get ten minutes of play time per day during which they may climb on giant Costco boxes and/or chase dirty Dairy Queen cups. 

You read it here first. 

Anna Meowrie Scratchwell. 

[meee]

What's this contrasting buttons thing? I see it mentioned here all the time; can someone please link to the post?

[kpmom]

57 minutes ago, erunerune said:

Anna Meowrie Scratchwell. 

And they'll insist on calling her Anna Meowrie on the blog so as not to mix her up with the two human Annas.