Lori Alexander 45: Sensoring and Sensibility

[PennySycamore]

Dachshunds were born to dig and burrow, but my dachsie prefers to dig and burrow in her blankie.  Our Lab, on the other hand, dug a hole under the back fence when she was a puppy allowing her and our German shepherd to escape.  The Lab never dug out again, but our shep became a determined escape artist after his taste of freedom.  Both dogs have sadly gone to the Bridge now, but they were wonderful dogs and they're still missed.

[Koala]

Of course she can't answer it!  It's not like it's true.  She just wants to spread HER message.  And find another excuse to talk about "barrenness".  It seems she works that into conversations quite frequently.  

[Liza]

21 minutes ago, Koala said:

Of course she can't answer it!  It's not like it's true.  She just wants to spread HER message.  And find another excuse to talk about "barrenness".  It seems she works that into conversations quite frequently.

@Koala   Not very nice considering that one of her daughters has no children ... for whatever reason.  Recently Lori had this very LONG summary of her good news about her health.  That is fine, but ... really .. with her mother so ill, it does not seem appropriate.  Maybe it's just me, but I would not go into it at all.  

[jerkit]

42 minutes ago, Koala said:

Of course she can't answer it!  It's not like it's true.  She just wants to spread HER message.  And find another excuse to talk about "barrenness".  It seems she works that into conversations quite frequently.  

It’s not remotely true from my experience within evangelicalism. We left church when I was 28 and I was (by at least 2 years) the only married woman without kids.

[AlwaysDiscerning]

This is so good. Its totally what Lori does. Lori is Sarah Jane in this example. 

https://jasminelholmes.com/propaganda-biblical-womanhood/#more-562

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So how can we use this method in a conversation about womanhood?

It might go like this:

Sarah-Jane: “Biblical submission is doing whatever your husband asks, whenever he asks it, as long as he’s not asking you to sin. If you guys are in a deadlock, even about something inconsequential, he has veto power.”

Mary-Beth: “I think submission is a wife recognizing her husband as the spiritual leader of the household and having a humble, open position towards his spiritual leadership. I think assigning veto power for inconsequential things or describing every act of service as submission misses the mark.”

Sarah-Jane: “Rejecting God’s Word is a good way to end up in hell, Mary-Beth.”

Obviously, this is a huge exaggeration (hopefully). But in this scenario, Sarah-Jane has taken something good (biblical submission) and used it to mask something that might be questionable (her theological interpretation) so that when Mary-Beth rejects the questionable thing (SJ’s theological interpretation), she is seen as rejecting the good thing (biblical submission).

Sarah-Jane also used transfer in a negative way when she told Mary-Beth she was rejecting God’s natural order. (SJ could have also used a fave transfer standby label and called MB a feminist). 

She took something bad (rejection of God’s natural order) and used it to mask something good (questioning a theological interpretation) so that when Mary-Beth upheld the good (questioning a theological interpretation) she was seen as endorsing the bad (rejection of God’s natural order).

 

 

[molecule]

Of COURSE Lori has a post about barrenness during the week before Mother's Day. For women who want to have children but have not been able to, the word "barren" is hard enough at any time. But this week is one that can be incredibly difficult for women who aren't mothers. Mother's Day reminders are everywhere--at the grocery store, in the drug store, on television commercials, on Facebook, etc.

I was about to say that Lori's insensitivity has sunk to a new depth, but I wouldn't put it past her to have chosen this week on purpose. That goes beyond insensitivity into just plain mean.

[Alisamer]

Lori has a very bad habit of seeing one person (usually one of her daughters...) do something like stick out their tongue in a photo or "be barren" (by choice or not) and then assume that is some big new thing that EVERYONE is doing. 

The world is BIG, Lori. All people are different. Maybe there are a couple young women who are married but don't have kids in her church, and the pastor hasn't railed at them from the pulpit that they should be popping out babies, so she thinks all churches are glorifying "barrenness". 

Thinking is not Lori's strong suit. 

Also, my pastor's sermon this Sunday was on religious freedom, the last in a series of sermons about freedom. His point in short was that each person is responsible for their own soul, each person is free to read the Bible and interpret them themselves, and that freedom of religion means freedom for ALL even people with whom we disagree, and that we must never ever use our religious beliefs to condone hate or violence. And also that Baptists have a very long history of religious tolerance, and that we should uphold that by welcoming and respecting those of different faiths. I really wish I could take all the fundies we discuss here and make them sit down and listen to him!

[jerkit]

3 minutes ago, molecule said:

Of COURSE Lori has a post about barrenness during the week before Mother's Day. For women who want to have children but have not been able to, the word "barren" is hard enough at any time. But this week is one that can be incredibly difficult for women who aren't mothers. Mother's Day reminders are everywhere--at the grocery store, in the drug store, on television commercials, on Facebook, etc.

I was about to say that Lori's insensitivity has sunk to a new depth, but I wouldn't put it past her to have chosen this week on purpose. That goes beyond insensitivity into just plain mean.

Also, she always throws in a jab about not "wasting your fertility." If I'm not mistake, Alyssa was in her late 20s when she got married. I get the sense that Lori thinks it's Alyssa's fault.

[Sarah92]

So apparently I need to repent because I  graduated with my Masters and amassed quite a bit of debt? Because Lori thinks that's not God's plan for me? Yeah I don't think so... I think I'm good with the idea of helping people overcome struggles through counseling. 

Also Lori, you used birth control so can we not? I mean like really? I see you give those who are sick an out,  except when you tell sick women to have babies. So which is it?

She lacks empathy, almost at a sociopathic level. She has no ability to relate to the lives of other people. It's okay for her to travel, to write a blog, and limit her childbearing, and to wear expensive things. But goodness forbid someone else do it. 

Also I love the dog talk. It's much more exciting than what Lori writes. We've had at least three sets of blue heeler/ Australian cattle dog puppies and they're great dogs. Intelligent, loving, and wonderful family dogs. The ones we've kept love babies and children. Ours have even been known to play hide and seek with kids. The one we have now, my dog nephew really, has a wonderfully quirky personality. He's also fond of bananas for the occasional treat. I also grew up with a Rottweiler who was the sweetest, gentlest "nanny dog".

[jerkit]

3 minutes ago, Sarah92 said:

 

She lacks empathy, almost at a sociopathic level. She has no ability to relate to the lives of other people.

Ding ding ding!

[polecat]

Quote

 they value temporary pleasures over God’s blessings.

Apart from the fact that Lori has literally no way of knowing why anyone goes on birth control -- sure, a woman might give her A reason, but there are likely many reasons that go into any one woman's decision to use birth control --

Travel and career are hardly temporary pleasures. Careers are often necessary for living, to putting a roof over one's head, supporting oneself and any children one already has, etc. As for travel -- not a temporary pleasure at all but a learning experience, an opportunity, exploration, memories that one will always carry with one. It is indeed a great privilege to travel, and many, many low-income people are never able to travel (as Lori sits on her half-naked ass in Door County soaking up those UVA rays like it's a competition).

Lori's womb might not be barren, but her heart certainly is.

 

[jerkit]

I can't even come up with a response to this crazy: 

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Ugh, as someone who just tried to get pregnant and failed again this cycle

People are just so ungrateful nowadays.

I never took pregnancy for granted before I was married…but really, when you go through infertility, you realize what an absolute miracle having children truly is because you are forced to study the statistics and the biology.

It’s such a sensitive system!

Everything has to be just right for you to conceive.

Funny story…the consolation prize of this cycle was we grabbed some spermies and I bought a microscope last month…so both me and my husband were all stressed that we wouldn’t see any spermies…and for a few very tense minutes we didn’t because neither of us knew how to work the microscope…but after fiddling around a bit…We saw sperms!! Yes! My husband was very happy seeing his own little army down there.

When we do get pregnant we will definitely have boys as the sperms that were moving in a straight line were super fast and knocking all the other sperms away like linebackers.

[P.S- I don’t like doctors and I avoid them because I think they will just corner me into IVF by doing other procedures purposefully incorrectly…so I’m doing everything that I can do at home]

We took a marriage class at the Catholic Church this weekend (we’re already married, we’re doing things in reverse precisely because of the fertility problems) and the thing I liked that the priest said was…

“What do you think it means when someone says ‘I want to have sex with you…but you/I can’t get pregnant’ It’s a deep rejection of the other person’s being…and people subconsciously register that in the back of their brain.”

That goes for men and women. A lot of women reject having any more of their husband’s children. I don’t like it when someone says ‘And this baby is the LAST our family is COMPLETE’ on facebook….You can use natural family planning for financial reasons but never rule anything out

 

[Imrlgoddess]

Another jab at Alyssa maybe?  Either way, she's just a callous old bitch.  

Lori:  birth control has been around for centuries!  

https://www.targethealth.com/post/ancient-methods-of-birth-control

[polecat]

31 minutes ago, jerkit said:

Funny story…the consolation prize of this cycle was we grabbed some spermies and I bought a microscope last month…so both me and my husband were all stressed that we wouldn’t see any spermies…and for a few very tense minutes we didn’t because neither of us knew how to work the microscope…but after fiddling around a bit…We saw sperms!! Yes! My husband was very happy seeing his own little army down there.

3

Oh my hell ... "spermies"? What adult talks like this? I'm curious about how they "grabbed" these "spermies." Certainly not through ... *gasp, clasps heart to chest* 

Quote

When we do get pregnant we will definitely have boys as the sperms that were moving in a straight line were super fast and knocking all the other sperms away like linebackers.

 

Ah, yes, linebacker "spermies," the sure-fire sign of boys. Because you only get girl babies from sparkly spermies.

Quote

[P.S- I don’t like doctors and I avoid them because I think they will just corner me into IVF by doing other procedures purposefully incorrectly…so I’m doing everything that I can do at home]

 

That's not how this works. That's not how any of this works.

 

*Note: Jerkit did not say any of that craziness. Whoever she quoted did. I'm just not sure how to fix it! Sorry, @jerkit, for besmirching your good name with that nonsense.

[Sarah92]

Spermies.... Gah just no. Like what is she doing at home??? You know what? I don't even want to know. *holds hands to ears lalalala*

[EowynW]

24 minutes ago, Sarah92 said:

Spermies.... Gah just no. Like what is she doing at home??? You know what? I don't even want to know. *holds hands to ears lalalala*

Well I'm no stranger to semen checks in the farm & dog show world, but we don't call them spermies lol

[Free Jana Duggar]

Spermies?  I have no words, so I'll leave this one to my man Todd...

 

Spoiler

 

[Frog99]

That poor woman seems clueless about the possibility that the difficulty getting pregnant may have something to do with her health. I went through IVF- but before I did, I had to do those ovulation prediction kits. Then I went on clomid- no ovulation. Even with a period every 28 days like clockwork. It was called unexplained fertility. 

We did IVF with ICSI, with transfer at day 5. I knew it was a girl based on the doctor’s description. 

DS was a frozen embryo transfer (FET or snow baby)- and I knew he was a boy again based on descriptors. Males tend to be hardier- he had been frozen in a straw of 3 and was the only one to survive thawing. It’s also normal for there to be some attrition and he had none. 

I say all that out of frustration that these people don’t research things or expand knowledge- they just assume that doctors will mislead them. For any man or woman out there dealing with this- research. Read. Talk to your doctor. Talk to a counselor if you need to process emotions. No lie- it was an intense time and injections are no fun. But if you educate yourself, it’s a lot more manageable. 

[delphinium65]

2 hours ago, polecat said:

Apart from the fact that Lori has literally no way of knowing why anyone goes on birth control -- sure, a woman might give her A reason, but there are likely many reasons that go into any one woman's decision to use birth control --

She's not even going to know if a specific woman is using birth control or not, unless that woman tells her so.  There can be a lot of reasons for pregnancy not happening, and they're not all BC related.  I assume that most non-pregnant, sexually active women are using contraception of some kind, but I can't make that assumption about any particular woman.  It's none of my business either way.  Apparently Lori has never read Thessalonians 4:11, 'And that ye study to be quiet, and to do your own business...' 

[Free Jana Duggar]

OK, now that I've gotten up from laughing on the floor about "spermies".  I read Lori's post and am sooooo angry right now.  I replied to the post. It won't be approved, but I had to tell her off.

I suffered from infertility. The hubby and I chose to adopt, but the first two times we were chosen failed because the birth mothers changed their minds and kept their babies.  I've never felt such unimaginable grief and even considered suicide.  I felt worthless, and I wasn't even brought up fundie where I was taught that was my only purpose.

Anyway, fast forward 10 years we finally went through the state and did foster care to adopt and ended up with a 2 and 3 year old brother and sister who are teenagers now.  

it just pisses me off that Lori shows no compassion and assumes all childless women are on BC and don't want children.  

Also, my husband has been a pastor for over 20 years and has never been in a church that "celebrated barrenness".  Like most people,, we mind our own business and don't make assumptions as to why a couple does not have children. 

 

[Koala]

5 minutes ago, Free Jana Duggar said:

OK, now that I've gotten up from laughing on the floor about "spermies". 

Thank God I'm not the only one picking myself up off the floor.  I am almost breathless from laughing at "linebacker spermies".

But seriously, which one of you is behind this masterpiece?  Go ahead and take credit for it, because it's fabulous in every way.  Besides, my brain refuses to accept that this woman is for real.

This bit was...special:

Quote

 My husband was very happy seeing his own little army down there.

Yes, there's nothing to make a fella's day like his own little army of linebacker spermies!

 

Please tell me she's not real.   

Side note- I am so glad that reply was left, because all of Lori's posts on barrenness seem like a direct jab at her daughter, to me. 

I take some small measure of comfort at the thought that Lori's daughter is off enjoying her life, laughing at how dumb her mother and her friends are.  Here's hoping she looks at her husband and says something like, "Hey honey, I know mom's as stupid as a box of bricks, but you gotta come see what this idiot wrote!"

New user title (or whatever you call them)- "Producing Linebacker Spermies".

Make it happen!

[AlwaysDiscerning]

Reader:

Quote

"One of my only regrets in life is practicing birth control as a young woman. I have no idea how many “silent abortions” I may have caused, and I am 100% sure that our one miscarriage was caused by the pill (it is extremely common for a first pregnancy after coming off the pill to end in the death of the child due to residual effects of uterine lining thinning). And there would be one or two more children now sitting at our table, who cannot be gotten back, even though I now regret rejecting God’s blessing during those years. We are now open to children, and it is the best decision we ever made."

Big lie about coming off the pill causes miscarriages. One of my kids was conceived 10 days after stopping pill and there are a bunch of resources that debunk this. 

[TeddyBonkers]

40 minutes ago, AlwaysDiscerning said:

Reader:

Big lie about coming off the pill causes miscarriages. One of my kids was conceived 10 days after stopping pill and there are a bunch of resources that debunk this. 

Same here. The first baby Bonkers was part of a rather large baby boom at a military base. I had stopped the Pill as soon as I got back from the deployment and the "date of conception" was 3 days later.

Second baby Bonkers was BAM- Right after another deployment. 

Maybe Mr. Bonkers just has linebacker spermies? 

[Evangeline]

One or two more children? Lady, if I didn't use birth control I'd easily have 10 more children than I do. Or I'd be dead. And I realize that may sound insensitive to people who can't get pregnant easily. I'm not trying to be a jerk, I'm just extremely thankful I don't have to choose between my relationship with my husband and bankruptcy or death. We can have decent lives because of birth control and Lori knows this. Lori, with her constant pain and parasite infestation, knows damn well she couldn't have physically handled five or six or 10 more pregnancies, but other people should have babies until it kills them. I honestly can't think of a bigger hypocrite than Lori Alexander. 

[3splenty]

The parasites have eaten her brain.

It must be sad to always be angry and hateful.