Dillards 53: Making Assumptions and Indoctrinating the Children

[libgirl2]

6 minutes ago, EmmieJ said:

My siblings and I are dealing not with an aged parent with dementia but our youngest sister who has Alzheimer's.  What is a bit frustrating is that it seems like we are on our own trying to figure out what programs might be available to her.  It has even been difficult trying to get someone to help us learn how to try to lift her without hurting ourselves, etc.  We sometimes feel like we are re-inventing the wheel.  surely we are not the first family to have a disabled sibling.

I contacted my local county and they were not terribly useful imho. They offered a free senior program where someone would come in once a week for one hour to give my dad a break, but when they visited my parents, they wanted all this financial information and he said forget it. 

I also went the route of "A Place for Mom" and all I got were private pay places trying to get my mom in as soon as possible. Once you mention Medicaid they get quiet. Lots of sales calls and emails. 

I called someone locally who is supposed to help families with seniors or the disabled. When I asked if he knew an eldercare lawyer he said he didn't. I found one on my own, right near my home. I stopped communicating with that person. No help. 

So I guess my point is, it doesn't hurt to try, but you might have to do some research. As she is not elderly, I would look into the Alzheimer's Association. If anything, you might find a support group and those are the people you will get the most information and assistance from. 

 

[singsingsing]

To me it sounds more like he's planning to assassinate someone? I mean, WTF, Derick, do you know what the Ides of March is? Generally people associate it with the successful conspiracy to assassinate Julius Caesar. So what exactly are you implying? 

(If anyone's wondering, no, I don't actually think that Derick wants to assassinate someone. I think he's just an idiot.)

[nickelodeon]

16 minutes ago, singsingsing said:

To me it sounds more like he's planning to assassinate someone? I mean, WTF, Derick, do you know what the Ides of March is?

Maybe Joshley can fill him in. "Marcus Anthony" gave a speech after it, I've heard.

[justmissedquiver]

16 minutes ago, singsingsing said:

To me it sounds more like he's planning to assassinate someone? I mean, WTF, Derick, do you know what the Ides of March is? Generally people associate it with the successful conspiracy to assassinate Julius Caesar. So what exactly are you implying? 

(If anyone's wondering, no, I don't actually think that Derick wants to assassinate someone. I think he's just an idiot.)

I recall a time in my late teens when I opened my mouth and spewed a whole bunch of nonsense without know what I was talking about.  I was put in check by someone immediately and learned my lesson to stfu if I don't know what I'm talking about.  The Duggars in general seem to have a difficult time with this concept.

[Georgiana]

11 minutes ago, singsingsing said:

To me it sounds more like he's planning to assassinate someone? I mean, WTF, Derick, do you know what the Ides of March is? Generally people associate it with the successful conspiracy to assassinate Julius Caesar. So what exactly are you implying? 

(If anyone's wondering, no, I don't actually think that Derick wants to assassinate someone. I think he's just an idiot.)

Spoiler

Why should Caesar Jim Bob get to stomp around like a giant, while the rest of us try not to get smushed under his big feet? What's so great about Jim Bob? Hm? Derick is just as much of a man as Jim Bob. Derick is just as smart as Jim Bob. People totally like Derick just as much as they like  Jim Bob!! And when did it become okay for one person to be the boss of everybody, huh? Because that's not what Volunteer TV is about. We should totally just stab Jim Bob!

Narrator: Derick Dillard had cracked. 

[Ivycoveredtower]

31 minutes ago, singsingsing said:

To me it sounds more like he's planning to assassinate someone? I mean, WTF, Derick, do you know what the Ides of March is? Generally people associate it with the successful conspiracy to assassinate Julius Caesar. So what exactly are you implying? 

(If anyone's wondering, no, I don't actually think that Derick wants to assassinate someone. I think he's just an idiot.)

Maybe he's planning to take down Jim Bob. oh my. and I honestly don't know if i'm being serious right now or not. 

[Four is Enough]

If Dreck was to "take down" JB, by writing a book exposing his shady finances, business practices, and idiotic values, he'd have to deal with a quivering, blubbering mass of JIlly for the rest of his life. He ain't gonna hurt the Boob.

[Kittikatz]

And DWrek has his head shoved so far up his own ass, he probably isn't aware of half the shit JBoob gets up to.

Any Tell all this twit tries to write would just be a bunch of drivel about how he is entitled to and deserves better.  

[Glasgowghirl]

Derick isn't going to expose Jim Bob, he is only complaining about not being paid in the hope Jim Bob will give him more money or to guilt people into sending him money. 

[littlemommy]

50 minutes ago, Four is Enough said:

If Dreck was to "take down" JB, by writing a book exposing his shady finances, business practices, and idiotic values, he'd have to deal with a quivering, blubbering mass of JIlly for the rest of his life. He ain't gonna hurt the Boob.

I agree.

I kept trying to make a pun or a joke involving "the Boob" and biting the hand that feeds you, but then I got tangled up in "Don't bite the Boob that feeds you" and I had to show myself out. 

[AliceInFundyland]

It's absolutely terrifying and disheartening to contemplate old age in the US.

My heart goes out to all of you. I pray every day that Mom keeps her wits.

[EmmieJ]

3 hours ago, libgirl2 said:

... is, it doesn't hurt to try, but you might have to do some research. As she is not elderly, I would look into the Alzheimer's Association. If anything, you might find a support group and those are the people you will get the most information and assistance from. 

 

Thanks libgirl.  Your experience pretty much matches up with ours so far.  The sister who is primary care giver has attended one Alzheimer's support group meeting.  She was the only one there for a sibling - the rest were mostly wives of husbands with Alzheimer's.  One said that she was driving her husband somewhere one day and he just punched her out of the blue!  So far, we haven't had to deal with anything like that, but 24/7 care is exhausting.

[BabyBottlePop]

1 hour ago, Kittikatz said:

And DWrek has his head shoved so far up his own ass, he probably isn't aware of half the shit JBoob gets up to.

Any Tell all this twit tries to write would just be a bunch of drivel about how he is entitled to and deserves better.  

Exactly. Just cause D-Wreck was JB's prayer buddy doesn't mean JB told him all his secrets.

I'm sure there's some things Michelle doesn't even know about, not because JB is keeping it from her but because she doesn't want to know or doesn't care.

[libgirl2]

55 minutes ago, EmmieJ said:

Thanks libgirl.  Your experience pretty much matches up with ours so far.  The sister who is primary care giver has attended one Alzheimer's support group meeting.  She was the only one there for a sibling - the rest were mostly wives of husbands with Alzheimer's.  One said that she was driving her husband somewhere one day and he just punched her out of the blue!  So far, we haven't had to deal with anything like that, but 24/7 care is exhausting.

My mom would throw things at my dad threaten him with a knife, .... The final straw was the next day he was home after having a heart attack, she walked up to him and hit him with her purse. He called us saying he just couldn't do it anymore so we went over, picked her up and took her to the geriatric psych ward (anyone pretty much over 40). They got her on meds and placed her after I gave them a few names I had researched. She ended up in the one my ex-husband recommended as his mom is there. I dismissed it but now I see her and my mom when I visit. 

Not everyone gets violent, but one must expect it. It is exhausting to take care of a person the worse they get. I stayed with my mom when my dad had his heart attack and I almost had a nervous breakdown. One night she got mad at me and punched me. I was exhausted mentally and emotionally in just one week. 

[Crazy Enough to Join]

Speculation: Derick is filing a lawsuit against JB to get money from Counting On. Calling it now for bragging points. (I called the tell-all first on Derick, just saying.) 

[KelseyAnn]

4 minutes ago, libgirl2 said:

My mom would throw things at my dad threaten him with a knife, .... The final straw was the next day he was home after having a heart attack, she walked up to him and hit him with her purse. He called us saying he just couldn't do it anymore so we went over, picked her up and took her to the geriatric psych ward (anyone pretty much over 40). They got her on meds and placed her after I gave them a few names I had researched. She ended up in the one my ex-husband recommended as his mom is there. I dismissed it but now I see her and my mom when I visit. 

Not everyone gets violent, but one must expect it. It is exhausting to take care of a person the worse they get. I stayed with my mom when my dad had his heart attack and I almost had a nervous breakdown. One night she got mad at me and punched me. I was exhausted mentally and emotionally in just one week. 

My favorite client/consumer is now getting Alzheimer's and has turned from an angel of a woman into a temperamental beast. It's literally breaking my heart to watch as the disease progresses- particularly because I know her sisters (who see her six hours every year) will toss her into whatever program/facility is cheapest.

[Jenn The Heathen]

My grandmother is 93 and totally still with it.  If there’s any genetic link for Alzheimer’s and dementia, I hope I have her genes.  She also does crossword puzzles daily and reads non fiction like crazy so I’m willing to bet those two activities have helped her stay sharp.

My husband’s grandmother is in her late 70s and has gone down hill since her husband died a few years ago.  Her children are in denial and it’s really sad.  They think she’s just a little forgetful.

[libgirl2]

1 minute ago, KelseyAnn said:

My favorite client/consumer is now getting Alzheimer's and has turned from an angel of a woman into a temperamental beast. It's literally breaking my heart to watch as the disease progresses- particularly because I know her sisters (who see her six hours every year) will toss her into whatever program/facility is cheapest.

That is so sad. My mom is at a good facility, it doesn't have a ton of bells and whistles, but its clean, the staff are friendly (even one of the cleaning women there is our friend) and she is being looked after and is safe. She even managed to gain about 20lbs as when she was in she was way to skinny from not eating or drinking much. There are doctors in the facility (it services rehab etc), dentists and I am happy. Is it where I wanted to see her end up? No, no one wants to be at one, she had even said kill me before you put me in one. But it was our only choice. 

[viii]

My grandpa is in the beginning stages of Alzheimer's, but my grandma is in denial and won't do anything about it. He's always been smart as a whip, and yet now he struggles to remember even the smallest details. He's also gone from a pleasant man to someone who is super grouchy and almost cruel in what he says. It's so sad. 

[libgirl2]

2 minutes ago, Jenn The Heathen said:

My grandmother is 93 and totally still with it.  If there’s any genetic link for Alzheimer’s and dementia, I hope I have her genes.  She also does crossword puzzles daily and reads non fiction like crazy so I’m willing to bet those two activities have helped her stay sharp.

My husband’s grandmother is in her late 70s and has gone down hill since her husband died a few years ago.  Her children are in denial and it’s really sad.  They think she’s just a little forgetful.

We thought my mom was just getting forgetful and we didn't want to believe it. My mom is 83. She did well up until a few years ago, so I can't complain too much. My ex-MIL is only 75. 

I take after my dad's side.... we all have heart failure! 

1 minute ago, viii said:

My grandpa is in the beginning stages of Alzheimer's, but my grandma is in denial and won't do anything about it. He's always been smart as a whip, and yet now he struggles to remember even the smallest details. He's also gone from a pleasant man to someone who is super grouchy and almost cruel in what he says. It's so sad. 

My mom always loved dressing nicely and jewelry. Even at her worst, she was color coordinated and wore jewelry, not always the most appropriate (a rosary as a necklace), but she still dressed up. Its funny, she can barely string together a sentence, she rarely speaks English, mainly Spanish, I doubt if she knows who I am, but when I showed her a new blouse I bought she said "Oh that is beautiful" 

[KelseyAnn]

3 minutes ago, libgirl2 said:

That is so sad. My mom is at a good facility, it doesn't have a ton of bells and whistles, but its clean, the staff are friendly (even one of the cleaning women there is our friend) and she is being looked after and is safe. She even managed to gain about 20lbs as when she was in she was way to skinny from not eating or drinking much. There are doctors in the facility (it services rehab etc), dentists and I am happy. Is it where I wanted to see her end up? No, no one wants to be at one, she had even said kill me before you put me in one. But it was our only choice. 

Oh no! I didn't mean to imply you're in the wrong. I just wanted to share my experience. <3 I'm so sorry you've had to grow through with what you have. 

[libgirl2]

3 minutes ago, KelseyAnn said:

Oh no! I didn't mean to imply you're in the wrong. I just wanted to share my experience. <3 I'm so sorry you've had to grow through with what you have. 

I didn't take it that way at all! It is very hard to make the decision and you only hope you pick a good place. 

[scoutsadie]

30 minutes ago, libgirl2 said:

I didn't take it that way at all! It is very hard to make the decision and you only hope you pick a good place. 

Hugs, @libgirl2 and @KelseyAnn. My 79 year old mom has terminal lung and bone cancer; it is hard, and what you are dealing with is hard. My heart goes out to y'all (and you others who are caring for ill loved ones). 

[Born Skeptic]

On 3/14/2018 at 11:37 AM, amandaaries said:

Well, bless your heart.  Imagine having your child labeled a Medicaid patient.  How horrible to admit that a child not be born with a silver spoon in her mouth.

FWIW, Medicaid patients are also human beings worthy of respect and medical attention. Money has absolutely nothing to do with morality, which appears to be an embedded assumption in your claims. Choosing to refuse Medicaid doesn't make you better, and accepting it doesn't make others worse.  You may know some people who refused it, but that doesn't mean that the vast majority do.  And if they accept Medicaid, they're often making a life-saving choice for their family. Your heaps of criticism upon a program that actually does save lives is offensive to some of us who've utilized its services. 

I think you misread what I wrote.  I most certainly did not put down Medicaid patients in any way. In an attempt to refute a statement that JB would absolutely accept government assistance, I cited my family as an example of why some people choose to turn it down.   I said that the insurance that we already had was superior to the coverage provided under Medicaid.  It was, and it still is today.  After a careful analysis, we found the restrictions of Medicaid more cumbersome then the restrictions of our existing plan.  (All plans have restrictions of some sort.). Stating that we chose not to take it because we didn't need it says nothing about morality, judgement, or some screwed up value assessment of myself or anyone else.

[FluffySnowball]

I don’t know if it has been mentioned yet (if so, please excuse me, I must have overlooked it) but Dully Dilly’s mum posted on Twitter that she would give framed “In God we trust”-pictures to all (!!!) her sons’ teachers when they were at school. Talk about an awkward, overbearing, over the top zealot...  I just can’t put my words in order to articulate how appalling I find that.