Joy & Austin 20: Baby Gideon is Here

[karen77]

7 hours ago, SweetJuly said:

My husband comes from a family of boys. He only ever had brothers, and told me that he would feel more comfortable with having a son because he'd feel more "prepared" for this than raising a girl. He couldn't really put into words what exactly he meant, especially because he's not at all the cliché macho guy and gets on brilliantly with women.

I did, in a strange way, understand him. There's almost only girls in my immediate family and the idea of having a daughter (first) seemed somehow more natural to me. Although I've always been a bit of a tomboy and felt that I could relate better to boys/men than women, I had a hard time imagining myself as mother of a son.

This is why we decided to find out the sex of our baby as soon as possible. Although we firmly believe that it doesn't matter what sex a child has as their personality depends a lot more on individual temperament than anything else, and we plan to raise our kids with as much freedom to express themselves beyond any "gender" norms, we somehow had the feeling that knowing the sex would help us feel more comfortable with whatever was in store for us.

Needless to say, my husband is now thrilled with the idea of having a daughter.

I have to admit that I was relieved when I found out it was a girl, and feel more relaxed with the idea of perhaps having a boy next. Why? Still can't really say. Maybe it's just that having a baby is really scary and the idea of having one of the same sex as myself gives me the illusion of certainty and reassurance

This would explain why men prefer a boy first (beyond all the ridiculous "son and heir" ideas), but I am at a loss to understand why women too would prefer a boy first unless they have been raised in a very conservative society where men are considered more valuable.

I had this exact problem, and so I was a bit nervous when I found out #2 was a boy, but we are getting on fine (he's 5), although, the energy level, wow!!!  Still not sure what to do when he's a smelly teenager though, smelly 5 year old I can handle. lol

[bekkah]

Watching their honeymoon episode and it struck me. When Joy is hang gliding, she had more physical contact than Austin with the guy. And she met that guy within 15 minutes of hang gliding. 

[JillRodsEyeliner]

Who would name a kind Ember? Is this some new trend? 

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

1 hour ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

I feel you. 

1st World Issue regarding Material things warning:  I was "given" a car when I was 16. It was a decent econobox (early 80s GM product), with regard to getting me from Point A to Point B. It was not fast. It was not showy. It was not, in any sense of the word, a fun car.

I really REALLY REALLY wanted a 1984 Trans Am. There was a bright red one on the car lot, V8, 5-speed manual, T-tops. My friend got a blue one just like it. I loved his car. I so very much wanted that TA. Begged. Pleaded.

My dad offered me a deal:  the car or college.

I continued to drive the econobox and went to college.

After my first semester in college, he told me if I'd been a boy, I'd have had that Trans Am, no questions asked.

Oh yes it sucks having a sexist father. The boys are far more preferred by my father in the family, the 1st (only) son, the 1st grandson, its disgusting.

6 minutes ago, JillRodsEyeliner said:

Who would name a kind Ember? Is this some new trend? 

Assholes, pretentious assholes.  Those two are so far up their own asses they are UGH.   I can tolerate Zach and Tori, much better, they seem much less, aren't we the prefect ironic, salt of the earth, born on 3rd base but think we earned our lives, so God has smiled on us, people,

[fluffernutter]

I have three girls. I reallllllly wanted a girl the first time around. I pictured (get ready to roll your eyes or perhaps vomit) us wearing matching dresses or combing each other's hair-all silly girl things. Never mind that i live in jeans and have never had long hair in my life. This was when Laura Ashley was so popular. In my mind we would be like like a mother-daunter Laura Ashley ad. I blame it on hormones. Well i had my girl and i was thrilled, though we never wore matching dresses.  Then the next two were girls too, and I can't imagine ever being the mom of a boy. My sister in law has three boys, and she feels the same way. Incidentally, my oldest just got engaged this week! So we will have a son in law, which will be sweet!

[Million Children For Jesus]

14 minutes ago, fluffernutter said:

In my mind we would be like like a mother-daunter Laura Ashley ad

I’ll admit I did this, too 

[justoneoftwo]

I'm the younger of two girls and honestly never even thought about if my dad would have wanted a boy until I was pregnant.  We talked about it and I honestly don't remember what he said even now (clearly he didn't care much either way) my mom enjoyed sewing us prom dresses and was glad we were girls.  Honestly I was hoping LO would be a girl for similar reasons.  My mom bonds by sewing cloths and I really enjoyed that as a kid (also she bonds with my sister's girls the same way) and there just aren't as many patterns for boy cloths.  In the end it doesn't matter because my boy is the perfect child (I'm not biased, just telling it like it is, he is the best ever).

I get the name thing though.  My family line are the only ones with the name to live through WW2.  H thought about changing his name to mine but as he is adopted we decided that would be too hurtful to his family.  LO's middle name is my old last name though, its our little up yours to Hitler. 

[Jinder Roles]

I have no idea why, but I've always had a strong preference for a girl baby (if I ever were to have a child). I think it's partly because I'm pretty homosocial and tend to feel more comfortable around females. But I just think girls are easier to handle and are more mature (and less wild). Obviously, that's some strange stereotype I have and not necessarily true.

I'd like to think that my preference for a girl is my childhood inner feminist rebelling against the patriarchy but it's probably because I've always wanted a sister. 

[JesSky03]

I have 4 sisters (3 half from my dad's first marriage). My mom wanted to keep trying for a boy but my dad was happy with his girls and put his foot down on that. I can't even picture my dad raising a boy- I think the universe knew what it was doing. It is fun to tease him though since all his daughters went on to have at least one boy each. 

[Million Children For Jesus]

31 minutes ago, JillRodsEyeliner said:

Who would name a kind Ember? Is this some new trend? 

I like it. I’m a crunchy type, so in my youth I liked earthy names and was probably a precursor to hipster types. (Sorry, hangs head). The word, ember, showed up in songs I liked by Norah Jones, Lou Reed, Willie Nelson, and Emmylou Harris. Yes, vinyl records were involved. I’ll see myself out now... on my bike. 

[Otto Titsling]

@karen77 lots of deodorant and Febreeze. Shoes stay in the garage. 

[Million Children For Jesus]

45 minutes ago, allthegoodnamesrgone said:

Assholes, pretentious assholes.  Those two are so far up their own asses they are UGH.   I can tolerate Zach and Tori, much better, they seem much less, aren't we the prefect ironic, salt of the earth, born on 3rd base but think we earned our lives, so God has smiled on us, people,

All of this is true, but I still like their baby’s name. 

[VelociRapture]

51 minutes ago, JillRodsEyeliner said:

Who would name a kind Ember? Is this some new trend? 

As @allthegoodnamesrgone said, Auj and Jer are fairly insufferable. That said, Ember is a perfectly fine name. Audrey and Jeremy explained gay campfires* were a huge part of their relationship and they wanted a name for their daughter that reflected that, which is one of the only things they’ve said that didn’t give me a massive case of eye roll strain. We also had a poster pop into that thread a while back who had given the name to her daughter as well. 

*ETA: So that was an absolute typo, but I’m leaving it because I feel like it’d really piss Audrey and Jeremy off and that makes me laugh. 

3 minutes ago, Million Children For Jesus said:

All of this is true, but I still like their baby’s name. 

Same. I think the name itself sounds really beautiful. We went super traditional with our daughter’s name, but I really like the name Ember. 

[Otto Titsling]

5 minutes ago, JesSky03 said:

I have 4 sisters (3 half from my dad's first marriage). My mom wanted to keep trying for a boy but my dad was happy with his girls and put his foot down on that. I can't even picture my dad raising a boy- I think the universe knew what it was doing. It is fun to tease him though since all his daughters went on to have at least one boy each. 

I friend of mine has 5 daughters. Her husband gets asked all the time if he wanted or was trying for a son.  He says no, but it was always his dream to be loved by many women.

[Cheetah]

1 hour ago, LilMissMetaphor said:

I know Joy can't help her accent but I find it so tiresome to listen to.  I don't know why hers is more vexing than the other girls'.

They all have very imprecise diction which is probably regional (mushy consonants), but Joy also sounds like her nose is blocked all the time... I wonder if she has enlarged adenoids.  

[Alisamer]

1 hour ago, SamiKatz said:

I grew up in a family of all girls (three of us).  My dad took us fishing, camping and probably would have taken us hunting if we had asked.  We lived "in the bush" (Canadianism), and he would take us out and teach us how to find your way around, what to do if you get lost, what you could and could not eat, all of that kind of stuff.

When I was older and living with my mother and stepfather, he did everything with us as well.  We chopped wood, worked on cars, helped run wire (he was an electrician), learned woodworking and how to cook, clean and do laundry.

I can honestly say I don't think either man would have preferred boys, or we were told there were things we shouldn't/couldn't do because we were female. Nor did we ever hear of disappointment that there was no one to carry on the family name.

 

Your experience sounds much like mine - I also have two sisters. I grew up on a farm, my dad is a mechanic and DIYer, and he has always taught us to do things and been proud that his daughters can do just about anything they decide to. Once I taught one of his male friends how to cut drywall, for example. I never once felt like he would have rather had a boy (though he very much seems to be enjoying having a son-in-law, they do lots of projects together). 

My mom has said a few times that when my youngest sister was born, she had already signed the papers to have her tubes tied, and considered changing her mind and trying one more time for a boy. She quickly decided against it, as "it could just as easily have been another girl, and 3 kids are plenty."

 

On the "Move Along" - I always thought it was an ocean wave. I'm amused at the parrot, bravely pining for the fjords.

[SassyPants]

1 hour ago, karen77 said:

I had this exact problem, and so I was a bit nervous when I found out #2 was a boy, but we are getting on fine (he's 5), although, the energy level, wow!!!  Still not sure what to do when he's a smelly teenager though, smelly 5 year old I can handle. lol

I come from a family of boys- lots of boys. I am an only daughter and my daughter is the only granddaughter out of 7 GKs. My husband also comes from a boy heavy family. I was thrilled to have a girl and 2nd time around I thought a second girl would be great. I wanted my daughter to have a sister. Plus boys and all that activity and noise. I was surprised when they said "it's a boy." I really had to recalibrate to having a boy. He is the best and I can't imagine my life without him.

 

1 hour ago, fluffernutter said:

I have three girls. I reallllllly wanted a girl the first time around. I pictured (get ready to roll your eyes or perhaps vomit) us wearing matching dresses or combing each other's hair-all silly girl things. Never mind that i live in jeans and have never had long hair in my life. This was when Laura Ashley was so popular. In my mind we would be like like a mother-daunter Laura Ashley ad. I blame it on hormones. Well i had my girl and i was thrilled, though we never wore matching dresses.  Then the next two were girls too, and I can't imagine ever being the mom of a boy. My sister in law has three boys, and she feels the same way. Incidentally, my oldest just got engaged this week! So we will have a son in law, which will be sweet!

My SIL has 3 daughters (she was one of 3 sisters as was her mom). She now has 3 grandsons, and 0 granddaughters. LOL

[Honeypot]

Has anyone else noticed the narrow and probably useless cabinets in Joy and Austin's fixer-upper kitchen?  I first saw them in Joy's video tour.  How can any dishes fit in those 8 inch wide cabinets?  There are a couple wider cabinets, but they are likely too high for Joy to reach.   I suppose Austin has never done much in the kitchen and didn't realize that nothing will fit in those skinny cabinets!

[candygirl200413]

In addition to Joy's accent being a little more annoying than her sisters watching this episode I always forget how limit their speech can be too. Like no variety of adjectives at all which is why I usually have it playing in the background while I'm doing something else.

When me and my brother were kind of surprises? My mom was nervous if she had all girls but my brother finally flipped and now he's the only boy (including the only boy who can pass on the last name but my parents could care less). But growing up/even now I'm more of the child that tagged along with my dad doing fixer upper things and engineering stuff because I always been interested in that. I always joke my siblings that I'll be the successful one living by myself since I always followed my dad around and know how to fix minor things around the house.

[freethemall]

1 hour ago, JillRodsEyeliner said:

Who would name a kind Ember? Is this some new trend? 

Are we talking about the Roloffs? I hadn't heard the baby before Auj + Jer and then recently saw it in another fundie context - in the book Breaking Free by Rachel Jeffs (daughter of FLDS cult leader Warren Jeffs) she renames one of her daughters Ember after escaping because she didn't like the name Warren gave her (Barbara). Her other daughter was renamed Majasa, so I think Ember got the better name.

I actually kind of like it, it's a more interesting version of Amber.

[Georgiana]

8 minutes ago, Honeypot said:

Has anyone else noticed the narrow and probably useless cabinets in Joy and Austin's fixer-upper kitchen?  I first saw them in Joy's video tour.  How can any dishes fit in those 8 inch wide cabinets?  There are a couple wider cabinets, but they are likely too high for Joy to reach.   I suppose Austin has never done much in the kitchen and didn't realize that nothing will fit in those skinny cabinets!

Looks like the narrow cabinets border the stove top?  If so, that's actually really practical.  You wouldn't use them as dish cabinets, you'd probably use them for spices, cooking implements, cooking supplies, etc.  

My parents have similar cabinets and they are used to store cook books, spices, baking powder/soda, shortening, tea/coffee, whisks, spatulas, etc.  All sorts of stuff you might actually want close at hand while cooking.  I wish my kitchen had cabinets like that.  

[singsingsing]

13 minutes ago, Honeypot said:

Has anyone else noticed the narrow and probably useless cabinets in Joy and Austin's fixer-upper kitchen?  I first saw them in Joy's video tour.  How can any dishes fit in those 8 inch wide cabinets?  There are a couple wider cabinets, but they are likely too high for Joy to reach.   I suppose Austin has never done much in the kitchen and didn't realize that nothing will fit in those skinny cabinets!

You're right, they don't seem to have a lot of usable cupboard space. I watched Joy's house tour again, and it's pretty obvious. There are a couple 'normal' sized cabinets, but they're up high and not very practical. There are lower cabinets, but again, not super practical. I have probably 2-3 times as much cabinet space in my galley kitchen in my apartment. I'm a single person with no kids, and I use most of the space. Their kitchen setup seems like it would be frustrating.

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

1 hour ago, Million Children For Jesus said:

All of this is true, but I still like their baby’s name. 

109% of the reason her name sounds obnoxious, to me, is because those two are her parents.

[Runningfromreality]

18 minutes ago, Honeypot said:

Has anyone else noticed the narrow and probably useless cabinets in Joy and Austin's fixer-upper kitchen?  I first saw them in Joy's video tour.  How can any dishes fit in those 8 inch wide cabinets?  There are a couple wider cabinets, but they are likely too high for Joy to reach.   I suppose Austin has never done much in the kitchen and didn't realize that nothing will fit in those skinny cabinets!

They might also work for storing baking sheets close to the oven. Ours have always been in the warming drawer of the oven, those cabinets seem much more accessible. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

3 minutes ago, Runningfromreality said:

They might also work for storing baking sheets close to the oven. Ours have always been in the warming drawer of the oven, those cabinets seem much more accessible. 

That's what I do with my very skinny bottom cabinet right next to the oven. I love it. Cutting boards, cookie sheets, and cooling racks fit in there perfectly.