Chelsy and John Maxwell 3: Will There Be a Welcome Home Party?

[ophelia]

Moving closer to her family wouldn't mean that their beliefs would change in any way, but it would be the biggest change in Maxhellian history.

[nomoxian]

10 hours ago, VVV said:

I heard that at my first job too, at McDonald's. "If there's time to lean, there's time to clean." 40 years later it is still stuck in my head...not that I live by it though.

McDicks was my first job and I remember that exact phrase too! Ha!!

[Bethella]

17 hours ago, Curious said:

Is John's house in the accepted 1.5 mile radius or whatever it is that Steve seems to expect his children to live in?

0.7 miles; they're two blocks from Joseph and Elissa.

[mango_fandango]

If the Maxwells cried loads after Nathan moved across the goddamn STREET, I shudder to think what their reactions would be if John moved states to be near Chelsy’s family. Heck, even swapping from Leavenworth to Topeka or Wichita would be bad enough in their eyes...

[JermajestyDuggar]

23 minutes ago, mango_fandango said:

If the Maxwells cried loads after Nathan moved across the goddamn STREET, I shudder to think what their reactions would be if John moved states to be near Chelsy’s family. Heck, even swapping from Leavenworth to Topeka or Wichita would be bad enough in their eyes...

I honestly don't know if they would fall apart. Nathan was the first and that's probably why they took it the hardest. Plus the few youngest were still actual children at the time. Children who were close with Nathan probably did cry hysterically. I'm not saying they didn't overreact. Because they so did (Teri and Steve). But that was well over a decade ago and a lot of things have changed. 3 more brothers have gotten married and moved out. And Sarah was actually a little cold in one of her responses to a commenter about missing John living at home. John isn't around much. They probably see him the least out of all the married brothers. I don't think they would be hysterical if he moved near Chelsy's family. Would Steve guilt trip him? FUCK YES. But they won't flip out. John is extended family now. 

[Ivycoveredtower]

21 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

I honestly don't know if they would fall apart. Nathan was the first and that's probably why they took it the hardest. Plus the few youngest were still actual children at the time. Children who were close with Nathan probably did cry hysterically. I'm not saying they didn't overreact. Because they so did (Teri and Steve). But that was well over a decade ago and a lot of things have changed. 3 more brothers have gotten married and moved out. And Sarah was actually a little cold in one of her responses to a commenter about missing John living at home. John isn't around much. They probably see him the least out of all the married brothers. I don't think they would be hysterical if he moved near Chelsy's family. Would Steve guilt trip him? FUCK YES. But they won't flip out. John is extended family now. 

Sarah has now seen Two Reversal babies get married she's probably just so over it at this point sill stuck in Maxhell. if one of her sisters marry's before her I think we might just see her crack and not stay sweet. 

[anjulibai]

A sister marrying would definitely make Sarah crack. I imagine Joseph, the first Reversal, turning 30 will be hard on her, too. Turning 40 will also be hard on her - that's going to be the end of any hope of marrying. 

[Curious]

It would be nice if John and Chels move closer to her family, have a baby and hire Sarah as a live in nanny.  She could help with the baby while Chels does her uh...whatever it is she does and she could meet some nice unattached friends of theirs/her family's to date...er court. John is a built in chaperone for her courting.

Even if the whole nanny thing was a sham it gets Poor Sarah out of Maxhell and she gets to live a little without constant guilt if as a 30+ year old woman she just wants to go to the damn store alone

[ophelia]

Did anybody else see this in Chelsy's latest IG story?!

I have to admit I laughed out loud. This would be quite embarrassing in a worldly context, but imagining this in fundie circles is just simply hilarious. It also makes me wonder wether Chels and John (and one of his brothers) attend a regular church. I don't think there are many possible young males in the nursery home with which she could confuse John.

 

Edited to add: I mostly posted this, because we know that Steve is reading here and this will immodesty will make him so super mad! 

[JermajestyDuggar]

11 minutes ago, ophelia said:

Did anybody else see this in Chelsy's latest IG story?!

I have to admit I laughed out loud. This would be quite embarrassing in a worldly context, but imagining this in fundie circles is just simply hilarious. It also makes me wonder wether Chels and John (and one of his brothers) attend a regular church. I don't think there are many possible young males in the nursery home with which she could confuse John.

 

Edited to add: I mostly posted this, because we know that Steve is reading here and this will immodesty will make him so super mad! 

Oh god that happened to me once! I put my arm around my sister's husband (who I've known since I was 12 and is basically my brother) because I thought he was my husband! We Stood there for like 5 seconds because he thought I was my sister via his peripheral vision. When we realized what was happening we jumped away from one another like the other was on fire! Omg he still makes fun of me about that....

I want to add that I bet it was Joe or Jesse. My guess is Jesse since Joe always has Elissa hanging on him. 

[singsingsing]

That's funny, and it's relatable because I think it's the sort of thing that happens to everyone at some point or another. Seems like the sort of thing that would make Steve apoplectic, though!

[Howl]

Quote

@ophelia said,  Did anybody else see this in Chelsy's latest IG story?!

I have to admit I laughed out loud. This would be quite embarrassing in a worldly context, but imagining this in fundie circles is just simply hilarious. 

Yup, fundie version of a wife swap. 

 

17 minutes ago, singsingsing said:

That's funny, and it's relatable because I think it's the sort of thing that happens to everyone at some point or another.

Years ago my ex and I were browsing at an alternative book store in Eugene, OR.   I was looking at a graphically illustrated copy of the Kama Sutra and I stage whispered something like, OMG, LOOK AT THIS! to my ex who was standing beside me, except it was a male stranger, who immediately said, "That looks interesting!" 

[LurkerOverThePond]

Well, I once mistook my MIL to Mr. Lurker 

[catlady]

if someone did that to Steve, he'd probably have the mother of all crying jags.  since the mere sight of cleavage makes him weep, imagine if someone other than Teri pressed up against his arm.  

[ophelia]

Okay, so I've got a sick mind.. even the thought of Teri pressing herself against Steve's arm is unimaginable for me, because these two just don't seem like the touchy type for me. But in the end they have eight kids. How the fuck did that happen? Did they schedule it? Did they think about death while having sex so none of them would have f*n. Did they wear something beige while doing it?

Okay. Sorry folks. I'll see myself out to the prayer closet. Sorry to anyone who now feels like bleaching their brains would be a good option.

[catlady]

2 minutes ago, ophelia said:

 Did they wear something beige while doing it?

oh, i've already snuck some wine into the prayer closet; have a glass with me.  that line up there made me snort audibly.  at work. 

[ophelia]

8 minutes ago, catlady said:

oh, i've already snuck some wine into the prayer closet; have a glass with me.  that line up there made me snort audibly.  at work. 

I'll gladly join you! Should I bring snacks?

[Ivycoveredtower]

that is hilarious I am guessing it was Joseph at least Elissa may have a sense of humor. if it was one of the other brothers not so sure.  

[catlady]

9 minutes ago, ophelia said:

I'll gladly join you! Should I bring snacks?

please do!  you know, for being a prayer closet, there's a lot of partying going on in here.....

[MsSaylor]

I once texted my MIL, meaning to text my husband, a close up picture of my ass in Yoga pants with the caption “im wearing your favorite pants”. Seriously horrifying. 

[singsingsing]

My most memorable accidental texting experience was when I was watching Downton Abbey at my apartment and texting my mum, who was watching it at her own place. Mr. Carson was in a snit because the household had just procured a modern toaster. So I went to text my mum, "NOT AN ELECTRIC TOASTER!!! DEAR GOD, NOOOOOOOO!!!" But I sent it to my friend's husband instead....

[catlady]

some years back, i was sending some random texts to my younger nephew shortly after he got his first phone.  they were mostly one-line quips relating to his hobbies, school, and sports, plus a condolence message when the family dog passed away (that was followed up by a visit the next day).  i never got any replies from him, but as he was a young teen at the time, i never thought anything of it.  this went on for three or four months.

then the Extended Family (TM) had dinner at a formal restaurant that involved both kids' birthdays.  the restaurant didn't make whole birthday cakes at the time, so grandma arranged to bring it with us.  well, Mr. CL and i had been responsible for transporting the cake, but on the big day, we had some distractions and got a half-mile down the road when we realized we'd forgotten it.  so as we turned around, i tried calling grandma, then mom, then nephew 1; nobody answered.  so i called nephew 2, and as soon as i heard "hello,"  i said very fast, "hey [nickname], your mom didn't answer her phone, so tell her we'll be ten minutes late because we forgot the cake."  

and an unfamiliar voice said, "you have the wrong number."  my jaw dropped; i said, "i'm sorry, i'm sorry!" and hung up. when we finally met up at the restaurant, i learned that i'd been one digit off on nephew's number.

[front hugs > duggs]

When I was in high school, my dad and I were fighting and I went back to my room and went to text my boyfriend about how big of an asshole my dad was.

I sent it to my dad. 

I heard him from his room scream,, "WHAAAAAAAAAAAAT!?!?!?!??!" . To be fair he WAS being an asshole. And then legitimately did not talk to me at all for about three days. Which was super fun because it was just him and I living together at the time!

[Howl]

3 hours ago, front hugs > duggs said:

I heard him from his room scream,, "WHAAAAAAAAAAAAT!?!?!?!??!" . To be fair he WAS being an asshole. And then legitimately did not talk to me at all for about three days. Which was super fun because it was just him and I living together at the time!

This may be my favorite texting story of all time. 

[theologygeek]

Last summer my friend and I went to the beach which is about a mile from my house.  The corner store by the beach gets very busy in the summer.  So she was dropping me off at home and I told her to stop at the corner store because I needed milk.  She was waiting in her car for me.  I come out of the store with a gallon of milk, open the car door, plop myself in the seat, and...well...  The driver screamed.  I screamed.  She had all her money sprawled out in her lap for whatever reason.  She probably thought I was going to rob her.  My friend was falling over laughing in the next car over.  In hysterics. 

The good news is that John and Joseph are probably going to a regular church.  At least Chelsy will be able to make friends.