Chelsy and John Maxwell 3: Will There Be a Welcome Home Party?

[SPHASH]

6 hours ago, deborahlynn1979 said:

I love all of the praise heaped upon an unemployed 27 year old woman with nothing but time on her hands for shoving two folding tables together. What a wonderful, precious example of godly womanhood.

And you know damn well her spinster sisters in law came over to help her aka spy on her.

[usmcmom]

I'm not sure which thread to out this in, but I have been thinking about all the reasons Steve is opposed to this marriage. 

Sorry if this has been discussed. I have always thought that Steve believed his first three daughters-in-law married up when they entered the Maxwell Dynasty. After all, the Maxwell family are known far and wide (in the fundie circle) for their conferences, their BRILLIANT scheduling books and their fool-proof ideas on courtship and marriage. Heh.   

Enter a Bontager daughter, whose family is not only well known, but seems to have a traveling ministry that still thrives. All this while the Maxwell brand is drying up.  They seem more relatable, personable and likeable than the Steve Maxwell Boy Band. 

It's clear the Bontragers have not bowed to the Great Steven's authority. They will not give him the alpha male status that the other in-laws have given him. They have basically said "Get over yourself, Steve. You're not all that."  

Steve cannot, in any way, say that Chelsy married up. In fact, it must irk him to no end that one of his sons might actually be socially "less than" his new wife. 

I'd love to be a fly on the wall when someone says "John, you certainly married up!" Steve's head would explode!! 

[Coconutwater]

I’ve always thought this, but since this marriage it’s blatantly clear that John is the black sheep of the family because he has is own mind (to an extent) likes to have fun, and is the only one who growing up tried to act normal. He married up into a family that sees him as a son and new brother, not “extended family” while their views are warped, I’m happy to see John happy and with in-laws he can have fun with and be himself. I really hope they are going to flip that house and move closer to her family (I know I’ve said this before)

[SamuraiKatz]

I think John is the true rebel in the family. He has been on mission trips overseas. He was working in the irrigation business with John-Marie. The family didnt seem crushed and heart broken John and Chelsey married and set up housekeeping. Riding the idle speculation bus I am guessing John might have moved into his fixer upper before he got married. And good for him if he did!

[HereticHick]

I just noticed that a blogger from this family in Olathe, Kansas: http://defyinggravitykansas.blogspot.com/  posted on Chelsy's blog that she wants John and Chels to come to dinner sometime.

Dining with friends outside the Maxhell compound? Oh the horror!

[JermajestyDuggar]

I totally agree that john is the light gray sheep of the family. I say light gray because he's not even close to being black sheep in his actions. His gray sheep actions were actually completely normal to mainstream males. But in Maxhell, he seems downright rebellious.

[Coconutwater]

It seems he had a lot of energy and nowhere to put it. He was interested in something different, he would have thrived in public school due for many reasons, not been diagnosed with a learning disorder, this stood out to me “We discovered that John blossomed when made to feel very special.” No shit Teri and Steve, all kids blossom and thrive when made to feel special and not like they are some burden you got cursed with because they are curious about life. 

[MamaJunebug]

7 hours ago, HereticHick said:

I just noticed that a blogger from this family in Olathe, Kansas: http://defyinggravitykansas.blogspot.com/  posted on Chelsy's blog that she wants John and Chels to come to dinner sometime.

Dining with friends outside the Maxhell compound? Oh the horror!

That mom sounds great! But: A single, adoptive mom? Can’t imagine Stevevovah will be pleased at Extended Family breaking bread there — but I hope John & Judgy do just that!

[Cat Damon]

On 1/31/2018 at 6:06 PM, usmcmom said:

Now seems like a good time to share a "so creative" gift I gave my daughter at her shower. She had mentioned how long it would take to build up a collection of gift wrapping supplies. So, I bought tape, ribbon, gift sacks wrapping paper, etc for all occasions and wrapped it in a storage bin. She loved it. I don't thnk I included Christmas paper because the timing was wrong but she had bought some at sales the previous winter. 

What a great idea! For my cousin's wedding shower, we did a "holiday" theme where each guest got a holiday in their invitation and they had to bring decorations so at least for their first year of marriage, they could have something to put up for each holiday. I really really liked that idea and it made shopping so much more fun than buying wine glasses or dish towels- at least for me, and my cousin didn't need any of those things anyway.

[Howl]

Wow, the Werners look interesting.  I'd go to dinner there. That spread pictured on her blog made me really hungry.  She's a home-school mom and an accountant with a (presumably) successful home-based business.  I'd love to know if she belongs to a local church and might get John and Chels to go there.  I wonder if she knows the Maxwells through using Teri's scheduling/organizing stuff. 

 

[Granwych]

Just read Teri's "Mom's Corner,"  and she's right about keeping the chastising short & sweet.  Interestingly, in the pictures of the Maxwells' at-home kids, they appear to be taken before John and Chelsy's wedding, with John but no Chelsy..  If I were her, I'd be pissed--there was plenty of time to get another pic, schedule or  no.

[anjulibai]

4 minutes ago, Granwych said:

Just read Teri's "Mom's Corner,"  and she's right about keeping the chastising short & sweet.  Interestingly, in the pictures of the Maxwells' at-home kids, they appear to be taken before John and Chelsy's wedding, with John but no Chelsy..  If I were her, I'd be pissed--there was plenty of time to get another pic, schedule or  no.

I agree. If they wanted to have included her, they could have. She was driving back and forth between home and Maxwell land to work on her house, she could have found the time. 

They didn't want her in the pic because she was not technically a Maxwell just yet. Plus, I am sure it looks better in Steve's mind to have one more son in the picture. 

[ophelia]

Maybe Chelsy will be featured more on the tits2 blog when she is pregnant. That would significantly increase her value in Steve's eyes. Especially if she was expecting a boy.

[usmcmom]

4 hours ago, anjulibai said:

I agree. If they wanted to have included her, they could have. She was driving back and forth between home and Maxwell land to work on her house, she could have found the time. 

They didn't want her in the pic because she was not technically a Maxwell just yet. Plus, I am sure it looks better in Steve's mind to have one more son in the picture. 

When our son was stationed on Okinawa, we were fortunate to meet in Hawaii for Christmas. Since we are rarely together, I arranged for a photographer so we could get family photos on the beach. 

Our daughter was not even engaged at the time, but we let her boyfriend come with us. We were all pretty sure he would be with us for the long haul. 

To my point (sorry) we included him in the family photos and I even encouraged them to get a few taken of just the two of them. After all, the other couples had separate poses. I did not want to leave them out. We DID tease our (now) son-in-law that he had to stand at the outside of all group poses, so we could crop him out if he didn't stick around.  

But of course we let an unmarried young couple travel with us* so we are just evil enough to include an "outsider" in the family photos. Steve is just mean. 

*Our Marine was THE BEST chaperone imaginable for his little sister, that's for sure. 

[WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo?]

In a less happy story, my family had 2 family pictures in a row that became unhappy reminders of my brother's broken engagement and my broken engagement. We instituted a "must be legally married to be in a professional family portrait" policy after that. If we get one taken now, we'll have to modify that policy to include my brother's sweetie, because I doubt they will ever marry.

If we face a situation like that someday with my kids, I think I would get 2 pictures; one with their special someone and one without. Easier than using scissors to cut them out. 

[usmcmom]

42 minutes ago, WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo? said:

 

If we face a situation like that someday with my kids, I think I would get 2 pictures; one with their special someone and one without. Easier than using scissors to cut them out. 

We actually did that too. We started the shoot with just the four of us - our little family of origin. 

I certainly understand the hesitation to have a strict policy. These things can get really complicated. 

[HarleyQuinn]

One of my sister's boyfriends came on a family trip with us and is in a bunch of photos. They didn't stay together, but now it's a running joke of "This guy was so hot, why did you leave him?"  

[mydoggoskeeper]

9 hours ago, WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo? said:

In a less happy story, my family had 2 family pictures in a row that became unhappy reminders of my brother's broken engagement and my broken engagement. We instituted a "must be legally married to be in a professional family portrait" policy after that. If we get one taken now, we'll have to modify that policy to include my brother's sweetie, because I doubt they will ever marry.

If we face a situation like that someday with my kids, I think I would get 2 pictures; one with their special someone and one without. Easier than using scissors to cut them out. 

As someone with two broken engagments (judge away!) I fully support this policy!  ha

[Jana814]

When my cousin got married in 2002 all of her cousins took a picture together along with the ones girlfriend now wife. She was on the end. It was a very interesting picture because she has dark hair and eyes and the rest of us are all blue eyed and light hair. 

[HereticHick]

2 hours ago, mydoggoskeeper said:

As someone with two broken engagments (judge away!) I fully support this policy!  ha

Honey, whatever you do with your heart pieces is your business : )

[singsingsing]

My grandma has a family portrait hanging in her living room from the 1930s featuring her uncle and aunt, and her father with his girlfriend at the time. Obviously they broke up, as he went on to marry her mother, but for some reason this portrait was kept around. I guess it’s kind of weird, but it’s a nice photo. Wonder whatever happened to that woman...

[Hane]

4 hours ago, mydoggoskeeper said:

As someone with two broken engagments (judge away!) I fully support this policy!  ha

My mom and dad had a tryptich of photos in their living room, each one showing us girls and our husbands on our wedding days. After I divorced Ex-Mr.-Hane-#2, one day I noticed something funny about our pic:  my ex’s face had been painstakingly covered with a same-sized photo of Billy Joel from a magazine, thanks to Middle Sister!

[OhNoNike]

When I came across my wedding alum of my first weddding, I trashed the photos.

I’m still friendly with my former inlaws (who don’t have a relationship w my ex).  Former inlaws just moved houses.  Ex MIL texted the other day to say she’d uncoveesd wedding photos and asked if I minded if she replaced ex’s face with Ryan Reynolds. Lol

[usmcmom]

But seriously, our son-in-law really IS on the edge of every group shot. I just checked the photo library and laughed because I REALLY could crop him out fairly easily. 

The kicker for me was Christmas stockings. I bought all new ones the Christmas they were engaged and had his name embroidered on one. I showed it to both of them and said "You're locked in now!  Seriosuly, if either of you breaks this off; you owe me TEN DOLLARS in emboidery costs!" 

[Hane]

@usmcmom, your Christmas stocking story reminds me of the Famous Heirloom Sterling Silver Butter Dish my second MIL gave us. She actually told her son, “If you two ever get divorced, make sure you get it back!”

When we did split up, I reminded him, “Don’t forget to take the butter dish!” and he got all teary. He should have thought of that when he was being such a dick I couldn’t stand living with him anymore.