Bro Gary Hawkins Part 2: Saved and Eating Weens, Like a MAN!

[Lurky]

Sis @Darwinesque I hope things get better for you.  My thoughts with you.

[Carol]

Holy fucking shit, Gary has threatened his FB followers with eternal damnation if they don't donate to his new Brokedown Bus.  He has issued a TRUE statement directly from the LORD.  

Yesterday at 10:42pm · White Plains, NC · 

Ok folks this is a true statement coming from the LORD.
Bro Gary Hawkins 
But if ye will not do so, behold, ye have sinned against the LORD: and be sure your sin will find you out 
Numbers 32:23 KJB

He's a shameless crook.

 

[Palimpsest]

15 hours ago, Spanger said:

Maybe it's the thought- if one of bro Gary's real life friends stumbled on that facebook, they might very well think it was his.  Around here, it is clear when we discuss him that no one is actually role-playing him.  

That page makes me a bit uneasy too, although it is hilarious.  I'd feel better about it if it had "this is a PARODY" stamped all over it.  Parody pages, sometimes really obvious ones, are sometimes taken seriously.  I'm also not pearl clutching, just a little uncomfy.

Bro. Gary threatening people with eternal damnation for not contributing to his latest defective bus fund leaves me (almost) speechless.  Such hubris!

Sis P.

[Flossie]

9 hours ago, Carol said:

Holy fucking shit, Gary has threatened his FB followers with eternal damnation if they don't donate to his new Brokedown Bus.  He has issued a TRUE statement directly from the LORD.  

Yesterday at 10:42pm · White Plains, NC · 

Ok folks this is a true statement coming from the LORD.
Bro Gary Hawkins 
But if ye will not do so, behold, ye have sinned against the LORD: and be sure your sin will find you out 
Numbers 32:23 KJB

He's a shameless crook.

 

Reading the verses before the cherry-picked one Bro Idiot posted, it seems to be a call from the Lord for his people to band together and drive his enemies away, but if you don't do that, then it's a sin and that sin will be found out.

So I guess I'd have to reply, if I were of a mind to:

OK Bro Gary.  I read my Bible.  The verse you quoted, and the ones before that, didn't seem to have anything to do with paying for a motor home for you.

But I needed to be sure.  I asked others what they thought.  I asked good people who knew the Bible and lived in the Lord.  They didn't agree with what you have written, but to be sure, I fasted and prayed.  Yes, I deprived myself of Weens and Gravy and prayed.  I read your posts and prayed to the Lord for enlightenment.  I fasted and prayed and kept you in my mind until the Lord answered my prayers.

Bro Gary, the Lord sayeth thus:  "Tell Gary Hawkins he is not fit to speak in My Name and spread the Good Word.  Tell him to get a job.  The lowliest of jobs will please Me more than his attempts at ministering in My Name.  Tell him that he should work to provide for his family, and thus will I be pleased with him.  

Tell him that he should seek adult education classes so that when he is properly enlightened he can speak clearly to those he is addressing, especially when he is attempting to speak in My Name.  

Tell him that I have been the One placing obstacles in his path in his quest to minister to My People.  He is not fit for this stern duty.  He has much to learn before he can become My Voice on Earth.  Truly, he is an embarrassment to Me and it is only through My preoccupation with the imbecile in the White House and all of the damage that that cretin could achieve that has stayed My Hand from smiting Gary Hawkins down as a worm under the feet of My True Children.  I grow weary of trying to gently clue him in, and presently I will grow weary of him.  There are many men and women who minister by living in the Lord in their daily lives and leading by example.  Bro Gary would do well to aspire to do that as well."

So Bro, it looks like you've done pissed off the Heavenly Father.  I think I'll donate my time and money to worthier causes than you and your trash heap on wheels.

[Beermeet]

Ok Folks,  so the new to them camper is down and just sitting in a camp in WV while they use the old one to preach in NC.  Bro Ween is all pissy about the lack of money and/or free mechanic work.  Calls out people that unfriended him even!  GOD is sending you clue after clue to get a job, even a seasonal one.  Perhaps they should be selling weens and gravy roadside when not preaching.  How much preaching can one man do?  It's gotta be super part time, right?  For the love of weens, get it together man!!!

Sis. Beermeet

[FeministShrew]

Since Bro Gary loves the RV lifestyle so much, he should seek a seasonal job in a campground. Several campgrounds I used to stay at had retirees and younger people who liked the lifestyle, who lived at the campground during whatever season they were needed, and did various jobs. Maintenance, working in the camp store or snack bar (Becky could serve good Weens & gravy!), security, landscaping, etc. They got a free RV site and wages. They'd be in the mountains (Cherokee, NC) in the summer, then head to Florida to work during the winter.

He could even lead bible studies, prayer meetings, and Sunday worship at lots of campgrounds.

[Carol]

So, let me get this straight.  

Gary believes if he preaches the word of god 2-3 hours a day several days a week, he is entitled to be paid for it at a level that will take care of all the needs of 5 people and a bus... forsaking all other employment to sit on his ass the rest of the time?

I would have loved this job!  How come I didn't know about this?!  Wow, the opportunity to travel constantly and tell people how to live their lives according to me!

This is the first time I've regretted not knowing the bible for money and profit.

Curses, foiled again!!

[Red Jumper]

Ok folks,

what did Bro Gary do before God called him he decided to grift RVs/junkyard motorhomes and free work/services? Did he move out from Mommy and Daddy into a grifted RV with his former wife?

Sis Red Jumper

[Dubiousclaire]

I

Spoiler

I

I saw this video on Facebook and immediately thought of Bro Gary. 

Not that he would celebrate the heathen holiday of Halloween. 

Sis D. Claire

[mango_fandango]

Bleurgh those look gross!!

 

[Dandruff]

Maybe Bro could get a job as a weenie taster.

[Grimalkin]

45 minutes ago, Dandruff said:

Maybe Bro could get a job as a weenie taster.

    He certainly is expierienced in weenie tasting.

[Grimalkin]

     Ezekiel 25:17

[pamplemousse]

Those beenie weenie popsicles look vile.  Let's hope Becky and Bro Gary never see that video. They might get ideas for how to expand their culinary repertoire.  Now excuse me while I go vomit.

[SuperNova]

12 hours ago, Carol said:

So, let me get this straight.  

Gary believes if he preaches the word of god 2-3 hours a day several days a week, he is entitled to be paid for it at a level that will take care of all the needs of 5 people and a bus... forsaking all other employment to sit on his ass the rest of the time?

I would have loved this job!  How come I didn't know about this?!  Wow, the opportunity to travel constantly and tell people how to live their lives according to me!

This is the first time I've regretted not knowing the bible for money and profit.

Curses, foiled again!!

Sorry, those jobs are open to invertebrates only. You have a spine and are therefore disqualified.

[EyesOpen]

Literally anyone reading his posts should question if he has the reading and comprehension skills to interpret scripture. Any translation. My Lord...

[Dandruff]

16 hours ago, pamplemousse said:

Those beenie weenie popsicles look vile.  Let's hope Becky and Bro Gary never see that video. They might get ideas for how to expand their culinary repertoire.  Now excuse me while I go vomit.

Maybe a food truck serving ween abominations and the gospel according to Bro?  If it breaks down, they can at least probably eat for a couple of days.

[keepercjr]

Ok folks,

since. Gary has been quiet for several days now (what's up with that?) I decided to play around on his FB and do some searches.  One was for "sodomite" and was gifted some real... gems

Spoiler

What the hell is a dipper head?  Urban dictionary says a dipper head is someone addicted to PCP but that can't be what he is talking about.  And you are right Gary, you are not the smartest person.

 

 

so Gary thinks gay people want to rape him?!  Also who the hell was Bryan talking to?  That is some seriously bad made up shit right there.  If his "sniper friend" said this then he has some crazy voyeuristic fanatasies.

 

Man wood.  Haha.  KING JAMES BIBLE IT THERE!  Also he has GOD WORDS!

Sis Keeper

[WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo?]

Hey folks. I had an idear about the Bro. Gary quotes that @keepercjr posted abuv, but I think Bro. Gary was usin' a ethnic slur, so I put my idear under a spoiler.

Spoiler

18 minutes ago, keepercjr said:

What the hell is a dipper head?  Urban dictionary says a dipper head is someone addicted to PCP but that can't be what he is talking about.  

My guess is that "dipper head" is weenese for "diaper head", since he's talking about Muslims in that entry. Two slurs I've heard used about Muslims men are "rag head" and "diaper head" to describe men who wear a head covering. (I think the proper term might be a kaffiyeh?) Ick. 

Now I'm off for some  and .

Yurs trooly, Sis. WWJCD

[keepercjr]

@WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo?

I think you are right!  I guess I am not fluent in weenese yet!  I have no issues with homeschooling and even did it with my kids for several years but yikes he is the reason there should be at least some basic oversight.

[WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo?]

@keepercjr--I agree about homeschooling. On the one hand, my sister did a combo of homeschooling and virtual school for her kids and did an awesome job. (It included courses like Calculus and several classes that counted for college credits.) On the other hand, Bro. Gary and other "homeskool gradjiates" we talk about here show a need for oversight and some basic minimums. 

[MarblesMom]

Ahh, some of his FB readers are catching on.....

[mango_fandango]

Not the smartest, eh? He has that damn right.

And wow, those old posts are something else. He is so racist and dense it hurts.

[Grimalkin]

    Dipper head made me giggle uncontrollably until I read WWJCD's post I think she is right, and a freakin jeeenus for figuring it out.

      I want to watch some gay rappers going at it, in a full on rap duel.  

   Bro Gary, I assure NO gay man is interested in rapping you. None. Not EVER.

[SuperNova]

Ok folks, is it just me or is Bro Gary strangely fixated on protecting his back door, if you know what I mean?

Also, I could really use a Weenese to English dictionary. Bro G's moronic ramblings are in a class by themselves.

Thanks @keepercjr. Them were sooper speshul powstins

Sis Nova