Joy and Austin: The Wedding Is Over, On to the Honeymoon

[Ace3]

Wow, apparently I have a cold black heart. Didn't cry at my wedding, didn't cry during any ultrasounds with my son and didn't cry when he was born. Not even when I was purging clothing sizes (as I hear people do?) Only time I shed a tear was when I packed up my pump after 3 months of trying to breastfeed/pump because I felt like a failure. It passed after about a day.  

[VelociRapture]

3 minutes ago, OldFadedStar said:

 

Dependent upon how fast they get married and if Jill runs late, it is possible she will be pregnant still at Joe's wedding. 

Unlikely, but possible.

I think it's pretty unlikely. The Duggars seem to stick very closely to three month engagements. Jill is due early July (so I expect baby Dilly a bit after that) and three months puts us at the end of August. I would say the JoKen wedding will be no earlier than mid-August and no later than mid-September. So Jill would be around one to two months postpartum.

[HarryPotterFan]

6 minutes ago, OldFadedStar said:

 

Dependent upon how fast they get married and if Jill runs late, it is possible she will be pregnant still at Joe's wedding. 

Unlikely, but possible.

Ooh maybe she'll go into labor at Joe's wedding!! That will bring in the ratings!

[VelociRapture]

2 minutes ago, Ace3 said:

Wow, apparently I have a cold black heart. Didn't cry at my wedding, didn't cry during any ultrasounds with my son and didn't cry when he was born. Not even when I was purging clothing sizes (as I hear people do?) Only time I shed a tear was when I packed up my pump after 3 months of trying to breastfeed/pump because I felt like a failure. It passed after about a day.  

To be fair, I lost a pregnancy before having my daughter. So when I cried during her ultrasound it was from overwhelming relief that the pregnancy was progressing normally. I cried when she was born for the same reason - I was so relieved and grateful she was alive and safe.

I haven't cried packing up her stuff though. I'm just glad she's growing big and strong.

So you don't have a cold black heart. Some of us just had very good reasons for being so emotional or are just emotional people in general.

2 minutes ago, HarryPotterFan said:

Ooh maybe she'll go into labor at Joe's wedding!! That will bring in the ratings!

And then people can go back to their favorite hobby of claiming Jill is an attention whore. Oh joy. 

[itqitc]

2 minutes ago, VelociRapture said:

So you don't have a cold black heart. Some of us just had very good reasons for being so emotional or are just emotional people in general.

I cry over most things: sad puppy commercials, my nephew potty training, weddings, good chats with friends, everything  except funerals.  It's there my heart turns ice cold. 

I can't find the new commercial anywhere online and I don't have cable  so no TLC for me. 

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

7 minutes ago, Ace3 said:

Wow, apparently I have a cold black heart. Didn't cry at my wedding, didn't cry during any ultrasounds with my son and didn't cry when he was born. Not even when I was purging clothing sizes (as I hear people do?) Only time I shed a tear was when I packed up my pump after 3 months of trying to breastfeed/pump because I felt like a failure. It passed after about a day.  

I wouldn't say you have a cold black heart you just aren't a crier.  I know several people who are very good at controlling their emotions, they aren't heartless at all.  My family is just weird and likes to tease me about being a crier, I've always been like this I wish I could keep it together and not sob at every little thing. I've also learned that it is part of my anxiety disorder so there is that too. 

[Daisy0322]

10 minutes ago, Ace3 said:

Wow, apparently I have a cold black heart. Didn't cry at my wedding, didn't cry during any ultrasounds with my son and didn't cry when he was born. Not even when I was purging clothing sizes (as I hear people do?) Only time I shed a tear was when I packed up my pump after 3 months of trying to breastfeed/pump because I felt like a failure. It passed after about a day.  

I'm pregnant right now and I have cried over things like the snow cone shack not being open, j say on the remote and the tv turned off, and burning my popcorn in the microwave but I am having a high risk pregnancy and I'm stone cold at ultrasounds and doctors appointments. I think emotions just come out at different times for different people. I wouldn't put that much weight on it.

[season of life]

On Lily and Ellie's blog, they say that the bridesmaids were some Duggar sisters, Anna Duggar, and Kendra Caldwell. There were zero mentions of Sierra Jo Dominguez or Carlin Bates, so now I'm wondering if Lily and Ellie forgot to mention them or Sierra and Carlin were not actually included as bridesmaids. I'm betting on the latter.

[Jana814]

I don't cry at weddings. I cry watching sad YouTube videos even if I watched them thousands of times. 

[Lilipad]

3 hours ago, SilverBeach said:

I wonder if there is any guy anywhere who refers to the first time he had sex as losing his virginity. I don't view having sex for the first time as a loss, nor do I think it makes a woman "impure". Sex is not dirty, nasty, or impure (I'm talking between consenting adults here). It's a normal, healthy part of life. Virginity and purity are both patriarchal bullshit, in my opinion.

This ! So much this ! Shaking this notion off has taken me 30+ years ! Reminds me of this friend of mine a couple of years older than me who was 'arranged marriaged' off in her early 20's and had a baby soon a year later. When asked how she was enjoying motherhood , her answer was "Its okay but I feel so ashamed now! Everyone knows I had sex at least once!" It was so bizarre!

I should mention we were raised in a quite orthodox community , though a different religion and all the way on the other side of the globe. Its always fascinated me how no matter, how varied the religion , the fundy parts of them all seem to have largely similar beliefs...

 

[HarryPotterFan]

5 minutes ago, Jana814 said:

I don't cry at weddings. I cry watching sad YouTube videos even if I watched them thousands of times. 

I cry at this video every time

Spoiler

 

 

[Screamapillar]

Ha, I'm also a member of the cold black heart club. Didn't cry at my wedding, didn't cry at grandparents funerals, didn't cry during pregnancy or when my daughter was born...the only time I remember crying in recent history is after I got pulled over for having a tail light out. I was about ten days postpartum though, so I'll blame that one on hormones. The officer let me off with a warning. 

[VineHeart137]

23 minutes ago, Ace3 said:

Wow, apparently I have a cold black heart. Didn't cry at my wedding, didn't cry during any ultrasounds with my son and didn't cry when he was born. Not even when I was purging clothing sizes (as I hear people do?) Only time I shed a tear was when I packed up my pump after 3 months of trying to breastfeed/pump because I felt like a failure. It passed after about a day.  

I didn't cry at my wedding or my child's ultrasounds/birth either. I'm more of a "can't stop grinning like an idiot" type of person when I'm really joyful.

My husband is actually the crier. He broke down the minute I stepped into the church, and he was literally bent over in tears when our daughter cried for the first time. He was so overcome with visible joy and emotion he had all the nurses crying with him. Just one of the many traits of his I adore.

[onekidanddone]

I cry at songs. Sometimes even thinking about the song sets me off.  The Weight (Levon Helm),  Hello in There, (John Prine) Long Island Sound (James McMurtry) and Deportees (Woody Guthrie). There are many more, but I'd take up an entire thread.  Aaaand here I go .

[Escadora]

Oh, man, I cry at everything. Happy? Cry? Sad? Cry? Angry? Cry. (sometimes) Hungry? Cry. 

I was alright until I hit eighteen, and then just everything became super overwhelming all the time. Oddly enough, things like weddings and baby showers and parties are where I'm all dry-eyed and awkward. 

@HarryPotterFan I started getting youtube recommendations for the HopeForPaws videos a couple of months ago. Watched a few videos and then one popped up of a dog the same breed as mine who'd been so horribly mistreated and my youtube binge turned from a total feel-good experience of animal rehabilitation and joy to one of almost uncontrollable crying and taking my dog for an extra long walk to the park that day. Can't do animal videos anymore now, but those kittens do look adorable (is it a happy video or a sad video? because I'll watch it if there's no hurt kitties and it's all just the guy rescuing them and making them happy).

[HarryPotterFan]

@Escadora It's a happy video! I cry at how grateful the kitties look to be rescued. Happy tears!

[Escadora]

6 minutes ago, HarryPotterFan said:

@Escadora It's a happy video! I cry at how grateful the kitties look to be rescued. Happy tears!

Awesome, good to know. I'm gonna put it on my Watch Later list so that I can come to it when I need a pick-me-up. Thank you for sharing the video

 

[NotQuiteMotY]

3 hours ago, SilverBeach said:

I wonder if there is any guy anywhere who refers to the first time he had sex as losing his virginity. I don't view having sex for the first time as a loss, nor do I think it makes a woman "impure". Sex is not dirty, nasty, or impure (I'm talking between consenting adults here). It's a normal, healthy part of life. Virginity and purity are both patriarchal bullshit, in my opinion.

It is. I was just having trouble coming up with a better way of phrasing it! Putting so much emphasis on it as a measure of a person is, to be blunt, stupid. Sex is something worth consideration because it does carry some weight health-wise and it can be intensely personal, but it's not the be-all and end-all that it's made out to be by some groups. 

[JesSky03]

I didn't cry at my wedding and neither did my husband. I guess I didn't find it emotional- we knew we wanted to get married from very on that it kind of just seemed like a formality. 

[marmalade]

1 hour ago, season of life said:

On Lily and Ellie's blog, they say that the bridesmaids were some Duggar sisters, Anna Duggar, and Kendra Caldwell. There were zero mentions of Sierra Jo Dominguez or Carlin Bates, so now I'm wondering if Lily and Ellie forgot to mention them or Sierra and Carlin were not actually included as bridesmaids. I'm betting on the latter.

Lily and Ellie lifted their intel from People. Since neither Sierra nor Carlin were in the "family" bridesmaid picture that they published, they had no reason to name them. They obviously didn't drill Joy about her wedding party, just got the basic, "I'm so happy!" exclusive quote sent to People along with the first wedding picture they published last Friday. 

1 hour ago, allthegoodnamesrgone said:

Just saw it, that wasn't ugly crying she had some tears and her face didn't seem red to me.  Austin looked a little teary eyed as well which I think is sweet. 

I guess we'll have to agree to disagree. Her face was contorted, which to me qualifies as an ugly cry.  It wasn't just tears rolling down her cheeks.

Then again, I'm not a crier, other than if I don't change the channel fast enough when an abused animal commercial comes on. 

[SassyPants]

My parents did not tolerate crying. As a long term PICU and NICU nurse, being able to compartmentalize emotions is sometimes a needed skill. I rarely cry-

[candygirl200413]

I been to a few weddings and I can't remember 100% about people crying ( I didn't and knew both couples rather well) but I totally understood how people could get emotional at weddings easily. I actually really cry at fictional shows (ie: Jane the Virgin for those who know which episode I'm talking about) Even though I know it isn't real, sometimes actors just can pull at my heart strings like really easily, I don't get it.

[allthegoodnamesrgone]

1 hour ago, marmalade said:

I guess we'll have to agree to disagree. Her face was contorted, which to me qualifies as an ugly cry.  It wasn't just tears rolling down her cheeks.

Then again, I'm not a crier, other than if I don't change the channel fast enough when an abused animal commercial comes on. 

I guess ugly crying like many other things is subjective.  When I say ugly cry I mean red blotchy faced snot running out your nose UGLY crying.  And yes this is how I look pretty much every time I cry.  My face always goes flaming red, drives me NUTS! 

And don't even get me started on the ASPCA commercials with Sarah McLachlan, UGH!  1st time I saw that my DD was in the room, she is a lover of all things furry with 4 legs, she was 6 (I googled it, 1st aired in 2006)  and just SOBBED, this is the girl who is now team soulless because she doesn't cry much.  I had to explain to her how people do horrible things even to animals and that there are bad people in the world. Not a lesson I wanted to teach my sweet innocent little girl at that moment. 

[griffin]

onekidanddone, I hear "Hello in There"  and you might as well just fold me up and put me in a drawer. John Prine is God's gift to the world

[Ace3]

3 hours ago, Daisy0322 said:

I'm pregnant right now and I have cried over things like the snow cone shack not being open, j say on the remote and the tv turned off, and burning my popcorn in the microwave but I am having a high risk pregnancy and I'm stone cold at ultrasounds and doctors appointments. I think emotions just come out at different times for different people. I wouldn't put that much weight on it.

Ok, I'm with you there. I cried because there was no one at the bakery in my grocery store and I couldn't get a cakepop. I switched stores for the remainder of my pregnancy because I couldn't show my face there again. 

3 hours ago, allthegoodnamesrgone said:

I wouldn't say you have a cold black heart you just aren't a crier.  I know several people who are very good at controlling their emotions, they aren't heartless at all.  My family is just weird and likes to tease me about being a crier, I've always been like this I wish I could keep it together and not sob at every little thing. I've also learned that it is part of my anxiety disorder so there is that too. 

Oh no, I'm a crier. I cried today because of a Doc McStuffins preview. I think I'm just broken.