The Boyer Sisters, Part 2

[FlamingFundie]

1 minute ago, FleeJanaFree said:

Schoalarships would have to play a huge role in it. It took me FIVE years to get my degree working 30-40 hours a week, my parents chipping in a thousand a year, and living rent free for the majority of it. I probably got under $1,000 schoalarshipnoverall.  I still needed to borrow $6,000.

It's totally possible. Theformermrsjones on IG, her husband just did it. They got him thru (grad?) school debt-free. My husband and I follow Dave Ramsey, so I look up to TFMJ along with GazelleIntents and others. Not saying it's easy in this day and age, but it *is* very possible.

[anachronistic]

@MargaretElliott I have been doing a Bunche de Noel on Christmas Eve for 3 years now. It is a LOT of work but totally worth it. I use the recipe from king Arthur flour.com and their directions are really clear. The key thing is leaving enough time to do all the steps - not just make the ganache, but chill it and whip it, etc. it doesn't always look like a log - some years it is a rather sad stump - but it always tastes fantastic. We do an almond-flavored cake with chocolate ganache and chocolate frosting, sprinkled with powdered sugar snow. The meringues are too hard - we have some plastic holly that I stick on top instead. Let us know how it goes!

[snarkysally]

48 minutes ago, ladyamylynn said:

@snarkysally I was wondering which part of my statement you disagreed with. Thanks for confirming that you're a homophobe! 

FYI, Christians, Jews, and Muslims all worship the same god. More info can be found here. https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Abrahamic_religions

I am not a homophobe. I believe the lifestyle is a sin, just like I believe gluttony is a sin, along with many other things that could be considered not harmful to another person. Why is it "hate" to disagree with a person's lifestyle? I truly don't understand that. 

[desertvixen]

@FlamingFundie, I prefer my ham leftovers to be fried up in the pan.  Maybe with some biscuits.  It's my favorite.

@ladyamylynn, that sounds good, especially the pan sauce. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

A good way for Brigid to get through college without debt is to start out at community college and do the first two years there and then transfer to a state school. If she saves money the first two years while in CC, she maybe be able to pay for the rest of her schooling. But fundies seem to only want to do online schooling or go to private Christian colleges. And I doubt that is cheap. 

8 minutes ago, snarkysally said:

I am not a homophobe. I believe the lifestyle is a sin, just like I believe gluttony is a sin, along with many other things that could be considered not harmful to another person. Why is it "hate" to disagree with a person's lifestyle? I truly don't understand that. 

Do you shame your family on thanksgiving when they take an extra helping of mashed potatoes? Lol. Most fundies I've come across don't mind the gluttony sin at all. But boy do they go on and on about the sin of homosexuality.

[FleeJanaFree]

12 hours ago, Gabe said:

 

Not per se. My hope is that need does not require. I consider it less than ideal for the wife to work outside the home, but not a sinful calamity. Both of us are also pursuing work from home and our own entrepreneurial activities which I would love to see grow.

I don't actually really keep up with the Boyers. I've read some of their blogs, but frankly found it too dramatic/irritating for women of their age, (sorry) is the blog what you're referring to when you say Brigid has her own entrepreneurial activity? Or something else- seamsettress, perhaps? She has a talent there.

Quote

 

I am comfortable with Brigid's education level. The second question is not one I have considered much. Public School is definitely off the table. If there is a need to integrate a sports program and work out a deal with a local school district I would consider allowing an athletic child to attend 1 or 2 classes in high school. Private school is a possibility but probably not until high school age.

-This was an answer that surprised me. Education is something I would definitely discuss in detail before marriage. I do like that you're willing to let your kids join sports teams.

 

I don't believe in sexual orientation.

-surprised again. And if your child believe  they are gay....?

 

I would be sad.

-relieved to hear this instead of 'disowned' , alert academy, etc. 

I would investigate it fully and take appropriate action. (Such action would be to immediately remove the child from access to that family member, and if necessary get a restraining order and/or file criminal charges.)

- I am glad to hear this. 

I would go to them first and offer to help. If I had actual evidence of crime I would report it to the proper authorities.

-I am glad to hear this, your previous statements on CPS concerned me.

Yes.

-worries me

 

Quote

No.

-glad to hear it

I will definitely monitor what my children read and watch to some degree. I also plan to follow the path my parents did, which was to tell me when I turned 18 that they would no longer try to control what I read or watched but that they trusted me to make my own decisions. I would also claim the right to restrict things I consider inappropriate within the jurisdiction of my home, if necessary.

-more reasonable than the duggars, I suppose. 

 

This is an inappropriate question for a public forum.

-your answer here surprised me very much. I expected a generic answer along the lines of 'I respect him, but in my household, I pray about it  and my helpmeet does things MY way"...

These questions take time and writing to answer. I will have to file them away and see if I can address them when I have more time.

Hopefully I formatted this correctly, I'll be the first to admit I'm not the best at knowing how to do this. If unclear,  I cropped stuff I didn't want to focus on, and  added thoughts or questions underneath others. 

[dramallama]

Just now, snarkysally said:

I am not a homophobe. I believe the lifestyle is a sin, just like I believe gluttony is a sin, along with many other things that could be considered not harmful to another person. Why is it "hate" to disagree with a person's lifestyle? I truly don't understand that. 

Because you're telling these people - who, whether you believe same sex attraction is a result of nature or a result of nurture, didn't consciously choose to feel the way they feel - that loving the people they love is bad/wrong/"against god" and their only option, if they want to avoid an eternity of torment, is to live a life of torment - without ever experiencing intimacy, without having a romantic partner in life, without ever having children, without all of the things you and I get to do and take for granted.  Because these messages comparing homosexual attraction to all manner of other "sins" like rape/murder/infidelity/whatever and implying if not outright saying that the way they love is inherently wrong and must be suppressed at all costs is the reason abusive "gay conversion" camps exist and the reason there are such high suicide and homelessness rates among LGBTQ teenagers.  Because even if it is a conscious choice, how the fuck is it your place (or mine, or anyone else's) to "agree" or "disagree" with the way two consenting adults who aren't abusing each other conduct their relationships?  It's not for you, fine, don't do it - but don't pretend that as a straight person you understand for a nanosecond that you have any concept of what it's like to grow up constantly hearing those messages and feeling from often a very young age that you are inherently broken or wrong.  

And I have no idea why I just bothered typing that up.  Blah blah "love the sin, hate the sinner" blah blah "god's laws" blah blah blah.  Bullshit.

[ladyamylynn]

24 minutes ago, snarkysally said:

I am not a homophobe. I believe the lifestyle is a sin, just like I believe gluttony is a sin, along with many other things that could be considered not harmful to another person. Why is it "hate" to disagree with a person's lifestyle? I truly don't understand that. 

I'm going to need to see your physical measurements before we proceed any further. 

[nastyhobbitses]

I disagree with plenty of people's lifestyles. I have friends who have SOs I don't like. I have friends whom I think could stand to have a bit more ambition in their professional lives. I have friends who are white and thought getting dreads was a good idea. I disagree with their life choices. But I also don't actively try to prevent them from living the lives they choose to live (unless it's actively harming them or someone else), force them into damaging and torturous "therapy", tell them that Jesus doesn't like white-guy dreads and they should feel bad about themselves for having them, or act like I'm better than they are because I live my life in a different way.

Also, how does someone being gay in any way affect your life personally? I mean, the worst way homosexuality could affect my life is my sister picking out ugly bridesmaid dresses if/when she finds a cute lady to marry. But if two dudes or two ladies are both adults and want to be in a relationship with each other, what the hell is it to you? I just don't get it.

As for Christmas Day, my family traditionally makes orgiastic amounts of food for the 23rd and 24th (lasagne and filet mignon with enough side dishes to feed a horde of invading Mongols), and then we spend the 25th and 26th lying around the house shoveling cold pasta and meat into our face-holes.

[ViolaSebastian]

Quote

I am comfortable with Brigid's education level.

See, it's off-hand comments like this that bother the crap out of me. The statement should be "Brigid is comfortable with her level of education." She is the one who decides whether or not she wishes to do the work to receive a degree, even if the decision of how to financially manage it was a joint decision in the marriage.

As for Christmas lunch/dinner/breakfast, I think it's going to be meat and cheese plates as far as the eye can see this year. And roasted in the shell nuts. And wine. And ale.

[dramallama]

1 minute ago, nastyhobbitses said:

I disagree with plenty of people's lifestyles. I have friends who have SOs I don't like. I have friends whom I think could stand to have a bit more ambition in their professional lives. I have friends who are white and thought getting dreads was a good idea. I disagree with their life choices. But I also don't actively try to prevent them from living the lives they choose to live (unless it's actively harming them or someone else), force them into damaging and torturous "therapy", tell them that Jesus doesn't like white-guy dreads and they should feel bad about themselves for having them, or act like I'm better than they are because I live my life in a different way.

Also, how does someone being gay in any way affect your life personally? I mean, the worst way homosexuality could affect my life is my sister picking out ugly bridesmaid dresses if/when she finds a cute lady to marry. But if two dudes or two ladies are both adults and want to be in a relationship with each other, what the hell is it to you? I just don't get it.

As for Christmas Day, my family traditionally makes orgiastic amounts of food for the 23rd and 24th (lasagne and filet mignon with enough side dishes to feed a horde of invading Mongols), and then we spend the 25th and 26th lying around the house shoveling cold pasta and meat into our face-holes.

I could maybe get on board with widespread preaching against white guy dreads.  Oh, and neckbeards.

 

 

Kidding.  Mostly.

[nastyhobbitses]

2 minutes ago, ViolaSebastian said:

See, it's off-hand comments like this that bother the crap out of me. The statement should be "Brigid is comfortable with her level of education." She would be the one who decided whether or not she wishes to do the work to receive a degree, even if the decision of how to financially manage it was a joint decision in the marriage.

But don't you know? Nothing you do in life matters unless a MAN is comfortable with it!

1 minute ago, dramallama said:

I could maybe get on board with widespread preaching against white guy dreads.  Oh, and neckbeards.

 

 

Kidding.  Mostly.

I mean, both of those hairstyles make Baby Jesus cry, but I'm not going to persecute someone for it, because 7-8 times out of 10 they eventually see the light and sin no more when they turn 30 and have to be mature adults who make responsible follicular choices. Love the hair-haver, hate the hair, I say.

[ViolaSebastian]

Just now, nastyhobbitses said:

But don't you know? Nothing you do in life matters unless a MAN is comfortable with it!

Well shit, the current guy I'm dating wants me to make my own life decisions based on my own needs and desires and level of comfort. Quick, @Gabe, you better give me your e-mail address so I know what subject you want me to pursue me doctorate in. 

[snarkysally]

52 minutes ago, desertvixen said:

@FlamingFundie, I prefer my ham leftovers to be fried up in the pan.  Maybe with some biscuits.  It's my favorite.

 

Me too! So good that way!

[FleeJanaFree]

18 minutes ago, ViolaSebastian said:

See, it's off-hand comments like this that bother the crap out of me. The statement should be "Brigid is comfortable with her level of education." She is the one who decides whether or not she wishes to do the work to receive a degree, even if the decision of how to financially manage it was a joint decision in the marriage.

As for Christmas lunch/dinner/breakfast, I think it's going to be meat and cheese plates as far as the eye can see this year. And roasted in the shell nuts. And wine. And ale.

I see your point...but I actually asked Gabe originally if he was comfortable with his wife's education/ leading education for anybody kids they have..

[Grimalkin]

3 hours ago, Palimpsest said:

It's a ham year (Mr. P's family tradition) with cauliflower au gratin for me.  We alternate ham, prime rib, and Cornish Game hens (my favorite).

On Christmas eve we eat seafood.  Enough appetizers for a meal only these days, but when we used to have a lot more guests I made bouillabaisse.

My tradition has been a beef filet. A big giant one. Mash, veggies, and whatever I feel like for desert. It's a bit spendy, but it's a special occasion and with six of us it's still cheaper, or no more expensive then eating at a nice resteraunt. We tend to have lots of leftovers too. It's actually incredibly easy.

 

[snarkysally]

49 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

Do you shame your family on thanksgiving when they take an extra helping of mashed potatoes? Lol. Most fundies I've come across don't mind the gluttony sin at all. But boy do they go on and on about the sin of homosexuality.

I don't intentionally shame anyone. Though I don't personally consider a second helping of mashed potatoes to be gluttony, I wouldn't shame anyone for that. I have struggled at times with emotional eating, which I do equate with gluttony. I wouldn't shame anyone for that either. 

Just as I don't shame anyone for the sin of homosexuality. I think the reason it is gone on about is because it's debated so hotly from both sides. When someone says "do you think it's a sin?" and someone responds "yes, I do." then it's seen as shaming, going on about, etc. That's really the only time I discuss it. My IRL friends know where I stand on the matter as a Christian and it doesn't come up beyond that.  

I would actually be more likely to address the issue of gluttony because it is something that would come up in my church body, which is where I feel believers are called to hold one another accountable. In a loving, gentle, and truth-filled way, not in a shaming way. 

[JermajestyDuggar]

1 minute ago, snarkysally said:

I don't intentionally shame anyone. Though I don't personally consider a second helping of mashed potatoes to be gluttony, I wouldn't shame anyone for that. I have struggled at times with emotional eating, which I do equate with gluttony. I wouldn't shame anyone for that either. 

Just as I don't shame anyone for the sin of homosexuality. I think the reason it is gone on about is because it's debated so hotly from both sides. When someone says "do you think it's a sin?" and someone responds "yes, I do." then it's seen as shaming, going on about, etc. That's really the only time I discuss it. My IRL friends know where I stand on the matter as a Christian and it doesn't come up beyond that.  

I would actually be more likely to address the issue of gluttony because it is something that would come up in my church body, which is where I feel believers are called to hold one another accountable. In a loving, gentle, and truth-filled way, not in a shaming way. 

So you wouldn't say anything if your child was dating someone who is the same sex? But you would say something if they were emotional eating? 

[Chickenbutt]

I have nothing earth shattering to say except if two people can find love together, then I am all for it. The world needs more loving couples, of any sex/gender/persuasion/whatever you want to call it. Love is hard to find and hold on to, so if two people find love together, more power to them.

[snarkysally]

42 minutes ago, dramallama said:

Because you're telling these people - who, whether you believe same sex attraction is a result of nature or a result of nurture, didn't consciously choose to feel the way they feel - that loving the people they love is bad/wrong/"against god" and their only option, if they want to avoid an eternity of torment, is to live a life of torment - without ever experiencing intimacy, without having a romantic partner in life, without ever having children, without all of the things you and I get to do and take for granted.  Because these messages comparing homosexual attraction to all manner of other "sins" like rape/murder/infidelity/whatever and implying if not outright saying that the way they love is inherently wrong and must be suppressed at all costs is the reason abusive "gay conversion" camps exist and the reason there are such high suicide and homelessness rates among LGBTQ teenagers.  Because even if it is a conscious choice, how the fuck is it your place (or mine, or anyone else's) to "agree" or "disagree" with the way two consenting adults who aren't abusing each other conduct their relationships?  It's not for you, fine, don't do it - but don't pretend that as a straight person you understand for a nanosecond that you have any concept of what it's like to grow up constantly hearing those messages and feeling from often a very young age that you are inherently broken or wrong.  

And I have no idea why I just bothered typing that up.  Blah blah "love the sin, hate the sinner" blah blah "god's laws" blah blah blah.  Bullshit.

I am not telling anyone that who hasn't specifically asked my opinion on it. It is not something that I speak about unless directly questioned, and when called out and questioned about it, I will give an honest answer. I am not going around hunting out gay people to preach at or judge. I was asked my opinion about it and I answered. Whether or not something is a sin doesn't depend on whether or not it personally affects me. Sin is defined by God in the Bible. 

I think that non-believing people get to caught up on the comparison of sins. Sin is sin, and the Bible says that if you've fallen in one point of the law you've broken it all. So yes, I do believe that being sexually active in a gay (or unmarried hetero) relationship is a sin as infidelity, lying, etc. However, I believe the same thing of gluttony, idolatry in all forms, etc. Any/all sin.

It's interesting, though, that you mention children because a homosexual relationship does not lead to procreation, and that's really not my fault. That's biology.

[dramallama]

7 minutes ago, snarkysally said:

I am not telling anyone that who hasn't specifically asked my opinion on it. It is not something that I speak about unless directly questioned, and when called out and questioned about it, I will give an honest answer. I am not going around hunting out gay people to preach at or judge. I was asked my opinion about it and I answered. Whether or not something is a sin doesn't depend on whether or not it personally affects me. Sin is defined by God in the Bible. 

I think that non-believing people get to caught up on the comparison of sins. Sin is sin, and the Bible says that if you've fallen in one point of the law you've broken it all. So yes, I do believe that being sexually active in a gay (or unmarried hetero) relationship is a sin as infidelity, lying, etc. However, I believe the same thing of gluttony, idolatry in all forms, etc. Any/all sin.

It's interesting, though, that you mention children because a homosexual relationship does not lead to procreation, and that's really not my fault. That's biology.

Generally people who are against same-sex marriage are also against same-sex couples adopting children, conceiving them with sperm donors, or using surrogates to birth them, which is why I mentioned children. In your ideal world where all homosexual people remain forever celibate and alone and we all live by the bible, it would be one more experience that would be impossible for them.  And "WHAT ABOUT THE CHILDREN/BUT THEY CAN'T HAVE CHILDREN" is so frequently used as an argument against civil marriage equality.

Of course, I am a female married to a male and am, to the best of my knowledge, capable of having children, but have chosen not to.  But no one's trying to invalidate my marriage.

[snarkysally]

15 minutes ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

So you wouldn't say anything if your child was dating someone who is the same sex? But you would say something if they were emotional eating? 

No, I did not mean to imply that. What I meant was that in my life right now I am more likely to address gluttony just because it is more likely to come up in my real life, in a place where it would be fitting and Biblical for me to address. I believe that Christians are called to hold accountable other Christians in a loving and truth-filled, gracious way. I do not believe that Christians are called to point out specific sins of people who do not claim to be saved. In fact, I believe that we are called not to do that. I believe conversations with unsaved people should be focused more on the gospel and not nitpicking sinful behaviors, whatever they may be.

[JermajestyDuggar]

1 minute ago, snarkysally said:

No, I did not mean to imply that. What I meant was that in my life right now I am more likely to address gluttony just because it is more likely to come up in my real life, in a place where it would be fitting and Biblical for me to address. I believe that Christians are called to hold accountable other Christians in a loving and truth-filled, gracious way. I do not believe that Christians are called to point out specific sins of people who do not claim to be saved. In fact, I believe that we are called not to do that. I believe conversations with unsaved people should be focused more on the gospel and not nitpicking sinful behaviors, whatever they may be.

So you would never vote for a ban on same sex marriage? 

[snarkysally]

55 minutes ago, ladyamylynn said:

I'm going to need to see your physical measurements before we proceed any further. 

Yet I'm the one who is trying to shame someone? 

[ladyamylynn]

4 minutes ago, snarkysally said:

Yet I'm the one who is trying to shame someone? 

Plank, eye, mote, etc.