Jill and Jessa Duggar Special Sunday Dec 13 - Merge

[19 cats and counting]

2 hours ago, socalrules said:

 

Derrick seems like the type of guy who would go see Star Wars opening weekend. Now he is likely limited to bad "Christian" movies. I know there are great Christian movies out there but I doubt Duggar relations can watch any Christian movie that is not on the level of Kirk Cameron ridiculous. Derrick was a fully formed person with his own interests when he met Jill and now it seems like he has just morphed into the Duggar lifestyle and left Dillardville behind. 

Didn't he take Jill to see a Broadway show?  Very worldly.

[2manyKidzzz]

Sidehugs are more Godly. 

[mebeforee]

They also went to that grape festival that would have had a lot of wine drinking going on, something the Duggars would have picketed before attending.

[SilverBeach]

57 minutes ago, Gossamer1 said:

Is that a southern thing I'm not aware of?

Yep.

10 minutes ago, mebeforee said:

The side hug thing is also bizarre because Josh and Anna did normal hugs during their courtship. The side hugs seemed to have been introduced when their daughters started courting.

Josh and Anna had special privileges likely due to Joshley's horniness. They also had hand sex that made me blush.

[mebeforee]

It's odd though, knowing now what his history was and their worries about his 'curiousity' and 'struggles with sin' you'd think they would have put harsher limits in place. I'm guessing it just never occurred to them until the boobs pressing up against a dude belonged to their daughters.

[SassyPants]

27 minutes ago, lascuba said:

Derrick took it upon himself to contact Jim Bob to be his prayer partner, so he was already plenty dumbed down before even meeting Jill. I think Jill will annoy him eventually, just because it's normal for people to want some personal space every once in a while, and that's something that might eventually get worked through (and Jill might actually improve in that regard with age and and a bunch of little kids to care for); but for Derrick, the ignorant-while-believing-you're-deep-and-smart is a feature, not a bug, of his marriage. Remember, cults get big when normal, relatively educated people join up and raise their kids with their new beliefs. In that sense, Derrick is no different that Gil and Kelly Bates.

I am not one that believes that Derick contacted JB because he wanted to get at a Duggar girl or wanted part of the cult action. IMO, he needed a prayer partner/sponsor as part of the requirements for his mission trip and JB's name was suggested. It has already been determined that the Dillards were familiar with the Duggars via other religious endeavors. Derick, needing a sponsor to make the mission trip happen, just picked a local person from the list of names.

[lascuba]

 I never believed that there was some conspiracy with Derrick contacting Jim Bob in hopes of getting a Duggar girl. I was unaware of the sponsor angle, but I find the very term "prayer partner," particularly when soliciting a stranger for that purpose, to be especially damning. Assuming that money wasn't on the table, that Derrick would contact f'ing Jim Bob to be his prayer partner tells me everything I need to know about him...dude's some combination of stupid and fanatic.

[lizzybee]

2 minutes ago, mebeforee said:

It's odd though, knowing now what his history was and their worries about his 'curiousity' and 'struggles with sin' you'd think they would have put harsher limits in place. I'm guessing it just never occurred to them until the boobs pressing up against a dude belonged to their daughters.

It's so interesting to me that in their logic it's not that something's wrong with Josh that he can't handle his sisters having boobs that might touch him when they have authentic hugs, but rather that boobies are scary and need to be kept from boys at all costs and to lock the girls up at night to protect them from their brothers' wanting to get at those boobies. 

Why was the prevailing thought not that maybe their restrictions were the problem and were giving the kids a complex? Or maybe if they'd stop  all over the place and keeping it on the kid's minds constantly, it might help chill things out? Instead, it was "MORE weird rules will fix this!" Weirdness breeds weirdness.  

[ThunderRolls]

4 minutes ago, lizzybee said:

 Or maybe if they'd stop  all over the place and keeping it on the kid's minds constantly, it might help chill things out? Instead, it was "MORE weird rules will fix this!" Weirdness breeds weirdness.  

I agree (and I still can't get over that emoji). I always thought Jim Bob's sexual comments were weird (but in a dorky dad kind of way that ultimately seemed fairly harmless), but they seemed to increase in frequency as the show went on. Not only is it odd that he and Michelle would be so public with these types of comments and gestures, but in light of learning about Josh's problems, they would continue to be so blatant about it - and this coming from such a sexually repressed culture. It certainly makes me wonder what types of comments/actions were going on when the cameras were turned off (although it could be argued that JB purposely hammed up his sexual prowess for the cameras to look like even more of a stud). 

[quiversR4hunting]

33 minutes ago, lizzybee said:

It's so interesting to me that in their logic it's not that something's wrong with Josh that he can't handle his sisters having boobs that might touch him when they have authentic hugs, but rather that boobies are scary and need to be kept from boys at all costs and to lock the girls up at night to protect them from their brothers' wanting to get at those boobies.

And this (as said a million times on this forum) is what is so wrong with these people.

The only time I have noticed boobs when hugging another lady is when she had implants. It took me by surprise because they didn't smoosh, I sort of 'bounced" off them. As for hugging men (I'm hetero), the only time desires have stirred when hugging another man is when I was crushing on him or dating him or married to him!

Since these people always point out how bad sexuality is it makes them hyper aware of it and blush at the first graze of a touch (kind of like a first crush).

[Bad Wolf]

I wonder at what age side hugs begin. I would imagine they hug and cuddle babies and toddlers. When do the kids get a side hug when they come running in with a skinned knee?

We hug a lot in church when we pass the peace. So far everyone has been able to restrain themselves from humping in the aisles. Wish we could say the same of JB and M. 

[Jana814]

1 hour ago, SassyPants said:

I am not one that believes that Derick contacted JB because he wanted to get at a Duggar girl or wanted part of the cult action. IMO, he needed a prayer partner/sponsor as part of the requirements for his mission trip and JB's name was suggested. It has already been determined that the Dillards were familiar with the Duggars via other religious endeavors. Derick, needing a sponsor to make the mission trip happen, just picked a local person from the list of names.

I get that he need a sponcer and a prayer partner. From what I can tell from his background Derick was not raised in a religious home. So he needed to go outside his family for religious guidance. 

[lascuba]

2 hours ago, ThunderRolls said:

I agree (and I still can't get over that emoji). I always thought Jim Bob's sexual comments were weird (but in a dorky dad kind of way that ultimately seemed fairly harmless), but they seemed to increase in frequency as the show went on. Not only is it odd that he and Michelle would be so public with these types of comments and gestures, but in light of learning about Josh's problems, they would continue to be so blatant about it - and this coming from such a sexually repressed culture. It certainly makes me wonder what types of comments/actions were going on when the cameras were turned off (although it could be argued that JB purposely hammed up his sexual prowess for the cameras to look like even more of a stud). 

I honestly think that that behavior was strictly for the cameras. In the very first Duggar special, Michelle could barely utter the word "underclothes" on camera--I can't see her being at all into PDA and innuendo in front of the kids back then. But then they gained celebrity status, the social media jokes/disparagement about how much they like sex started, JB and Michelle started kissing all the time on camera to prove how much in love they are, and the producers ran with it by constantly egging JB on with the sexual comments  and he, dork that he is, would comply and escalate. Added bonus that they can claim it's part of their "ministry" by showing as how horny you can still be for your spouse after 19 kids and dressing modestly. "See, Christians love sex, too!"

[metheglyn]

I linked to this Thanksgiving day pic from Derrick's Twitter acccount at some point in one thread or another, but I couldn't figure out how (or if it's possible) to embed a tweet. 

He looks a lot better/healthier than he did in the THs in the first special, although he's still got terrible hair. 

 

[Jana814]

Yea he deffently looks better then the special. Thanks for posting the picture. 

[EmmieJ]

4 hours ago, ThunderRolls said:

I agree, it's totally a Southern thing. A lot of "Yankees" seem to be totally perplexed by common Southern niceties and social norms. The use of Miss/Mr (such as "Miss Cathy" or "Mr. Derrick") is just politeness. Another one that seems to confuse Northerners (or West Coasters) is people calling their parents "Mama" and "Daddy" well into adulthood. My mother still references her "Mama" and "Daddy" - and my Midwestern in-laws and friends look at her like she's some child-woman longing for her carefree days in the 50s. 

I also agree there does seem to be a general reverence to elders in the South more so than anywhere else I've ever lived - which can be good and bad at times. 

Edit: I want to add that I don't say "Yankees" to be disparaging or blame them for not being aware of the social mores of the South (while I've lived in the South and my mother's family is from the South, I was mostly raised in Yankeeland) - there's a lot of things that aren't easy to be aware us until you actually visit or live somewhere to fully experience the customs. 

My mother's parents were born and raised in Alabama (although my grand-daddy - that's what we called him) had a wanderlust and he and my grandmother moved around a bit until finally settling in Washington state.  So my mom had Southern roots but grew up primarily in the northwest.  She always refers to her parents as Mother and Daddy.  Not sure why the formal "Mother" and she has never spoken much about their relationship.  It's always been a question mark for all of us offspring.

My dad was born and raised in Los Angeles - and he called his mom "Ma" and his father, Dad or occasionally affectionately, Pappy. 

My sister-in-law's maternal side is from Ohio area, which I don't think is normally considered the South, but her mom is very much the "respect your elders" type of person.  It annoys me sometimes, because I'm in my 50's, dammit, and I'd like to have a conversation with her as equals, not as if I need to defer to her because she's my elder.  But it's a minor quibble, she's usually easy to get along with - but once in awhile, she pulls the age card and will verbally smack someone down for disagreeing with her.  That is one tradition I'd be happy to say goodbye to.

And when a little girl, I said Mama and Daddy, but by probably the 2nd grade, I switched to "mom" and "dad," and that's how most of my friends referred to their parents as well.  2nd generation California Yankee.

[lizzybee]

10 minutes ago, EmmieJ said:

My mother's parents were born and raised in Alabama (although my grand-daddy - that's what we called him) had a wanderlust and he and my grandmother moved around a bit until finally settling in Washington state.  So my mom had Southern roots but grew up primarily in the northwest.  She always refers to her parents as Mother and Daddy.  Not sure why the formal "Mother" and she has never spoken much about their relationship.  It's always been a question mark for all of us offspring.

My dad was born and raised in Los Angeles - and he called his mom "Ma" and his father, Dad or occasionally affectionately, Pappy. 

My sister-in-law's maternal side is from Ohio area, which I don't think is normally considered the South, but her mom is very much the "respect your elders" type of person.  It annoys me sometimes, because I'm in my 50's, dammit, and I'd like to have a conversation with her as equals, not as if I need to defer to her because she's my elder.  But it's a minor quibble, she's usually easy to get along with - but once in awhile, she pulls the age card and will verbally smack someone down for disagreeing with her.  That is one tradition I'd be happy to say goodbye to.

And when a little girl, I said Mama and Daddy, but by probably the 2nd grade, I switched to "mom" and "dad," and that's how most of my friends referred to their parents as well.  2nd generation California Yankee.

I'm southern. My dad calls his parents Mother and Daddy. It's just what he calls them. There's nothing but affection between them, that's just his name for her. Presumably my grandmother chose the name for herself. When I was born they decided I'd call them Nanny and Papa, so I imagine they chose Mother and Daddy too. I also use daddy for my father, my teenaged sister prefers dad when she isn't teasingly calling him "Father." 

[Gossamer1]

1 hour ago, lascuba said:

Added bonus that they can claim it's part of their "ministry" by showing as how horny you can still be for your spouse after 19 kids and dressing modestly. "See, Christians love sex, too!"

Just ew! 

 

I wonder if Michelle has any racy outfits for alone time with J'Boob.

[FrumperSeamstress]

11 minutes ago, Gossamer1 said:

Just ew! 

 

I wonder if Michelle has any racy outfits for alone time with J'Boob.

 

[librarychick]

I'm from the Deep South. Miss/Mr. Is a southern "thang" as we say here.  Just like we all say Yes, Ma'am/ No, Sir to our elders well into our own adulthood. It's a respect thing.  That said after 47 years of marriage, my mother still calls my grandma Mrs. ( insert last name here).  She has never called her by her first name EVER. But then you would have to know my grandma to fully understand that situation.  I call my parents mama and daddy and I am 43.  Except when they are driving me insane then I call them by their full names. Kinda like you do a child. (Or husband) that is in big time trouble.  Lol

[Mothership]

Haven't decided whether I"m going to watch the second special.  I think I've had enough and in any case, I need to get some knitting projects finished.  Knitting needles are a dangerous thing when watching these people--I might react to quickly and use one to put my eye out.

On another note, has the delightful nugget from the Dullards preview (end of last show) been discussed:  "we came to central America [btw, why don't they name the country--do they not know that CA is a region and not a country?] we were a family of 3, we may come back as a family of 4".  

 

SO much to say about that statement from the obvious hint at an announcement--ready to take Jessa's delivery thunder to her need to find a qualified physician or MW if she's going to go the VBAC route.

[Cerealgirl]

1 hour ago, SassyPants said: I am not one that believes that Derick contacted JB because he wanted to get at a Duggar girl or wanted part of the cult action. IMO, he needed a prayer partner/sponsor as part of the requirements for his mission trip and JB's name was suggested. It has already been determined that the Dillards were familiar with the Duggars via other religious endeavors. Derick, needing a sponsor to make the mission trip happen, just picked a local person from the list of names.

I get that he need a sponcer and a prayer partner. From what I can tell from his background Derick was not raised in a religious home. So he needed to go outside his family for religious guidance. 

I always thought that the "prayer partner" thing was the lamest load of bs they could come up with. Of course he liked her. The Duggars had already been famous and getting letters and presents from strangers. Why would you reach out to a semi celeb to share prayers across the globe without having some sort of crush on someone? And you mean to tell me he couldn't get a prayer partner or sponsor from someone he actually knew?

[Mrsaztx]

Re: Jill's Nike-tactic yoga pants (the scandal!) does anyone remember the episode, I think it was just before she had her baby, when she and Derrick went to get pedicures? It's jumped out at me because she was sitting in the pedi chair with her skirt sitting above her knees and her knees were blurred. I just felt that was such utter stupidity because what pedi place doesn't give you a towel for modesty when you're wearing a skirt of you want one, and also obviously she was fine with everyone in there seeing her knees, including the male nail techs, but they had to blur them for tv. Seemed stupid and contrived to me, and got me thinking she has been sneaking away from the fundy dress code a bit 

[missegeno]

The side hug thing is also bizarre because Josh and Anna did normal hugs during their courtship. The side hugs seemed to have been introduced when their daughters started courting.

I think side hugs as a courtship restriction was [at least shown as] Jessa's suggestion. If I remember right, it's in the episode where she and Ben were interrogated by the humpers about boundaries when they started courting.

I always thought Jessa just wanted the bragging rights for her extra righteous courtship.

[Cerealgirl]

Re: Jill's Nike-tactic yoga pants (the scandal!) does anyone remember the episode, I think it was just before she had her baby, when she and Derrick went to get pedicures? It's jumped out at me because she was sitting in the pedi chair with her skirt sitting above her knees and her knees were blurred. I just felt that was such utter stupidity because what pedi place doesn't give you a towel for modesty when you're wearing a skirt of you want one, and also obviously she was fine with everyone in there seeing her knees, including the male nail techs, but they had to blur them for tv. Seemed stupid and contrived to me, and got me thinking she has been sneaking away from the fundy dress code a bit 

THEY BLURRED HER KNEES? BAHAHAHAHA!!!