Lack of interest in Maxwell conferences

[OnceModestTwiceShy]

I'm sorry to backtrack, just read this entire thread and....am I to understand that Poor Sarah KNOWS ABOUT FJ? (Per TalithaCumi's post) I'm flabbergasted. :pink-shock:

[VodouDoll]

She'd have to, I guess, since she gets a print out of every website Steve visits. I never thought about it before but it makes sense.

[halcionne]

She'd have to, I guess, since she gets a print out of every website Steve visits. I never thought about it before but it makes sense.

:lol: :lol: :lol:

There's also that time that treemom and a couple of other FJers went to a conference and...said things to the girls. (I need to reread that. It was going down when I first found Free Jinger and I didn't fully appreciate the enormity of what was happening at the time.)

[treemom]

:lol: :lol: :lol:

There's also that time that treemom and a couple of other FJers went to a conference and...said things to the girls. (I need to reread that. It was going down when I first found Free Jinger and I didn't fully appreciate the enormity of what was happening at the time.)

I was really the only one who talked. Anna asked me if we went to church in the area. I said no, but I have lived in the area for 16 years, and then I said my son goes to scouts in the area and we have participated in things at that church (it's a big baptist mega church. The kind where pants are actually worn at Sunday services, has lots of sports teams, sponsors Girl Scouts and Boy Scouts, etc. not a maxwell church and probably 1/3+ of the households in the church have women who work)

I also said I was Jewish which made her give a shocked look.

After I told off Steve (and to reiterate for those on other sites who often like to get the fucking story wrong....the only thing I regret was swearing. I said without it really registering that I was using profanity that he has fucked his kids up.) for ruining his kids and spreading dangerous and damaging theology we left the area they were holding the sessions.

As we walked out the book area had both Mary and Sarah there. All I said was when you realize your father is running a cult and you awaken to the Stockholm syndrome and need to get out, there are lots of resources which can help you leave the abuse your father is doing to you.

Sarah looked shocked. Mary said but I love my daddy and made the hand heart next to her chest.

I too steve I was from FJ (I wish I had said I am a participant in the community so it didn't sound like I had the communities approval). The only people who would have heard that were Anna, Steve, Jesse, Joseph and John.

I felt cruel too because I called out both Joseph and Christopher's failed engagements and it seemed mean to do it while Joseph was there. But my point was you talk about how many pieces of my heart I am missing from dating but I was married, happily, with no broken engagements, and a well adjusted preteen. While Joseph and Christopher probably did give pieces of their heart away. The certainly used the same language to discuss Sarah and Elizabeth that they use to discuss their wives. I never referred to another man using that language than my husband. But in his fucked up cult I am the damaged one.

(Not that I think broken engagements, being in love multiple times, divorce, etc means women or men are less whole)

That is the full extent of anything anyone said during the time I went to a conference.

[blessalessi]

On that you're wrong. Steve is a monster, but he never forbid Teri from drinking Pepsi. If you go back to the Pepsi story which is in one of the old Mom's Corners, it was TERI who decided to stop drinking Pepsi because it was coming between her and Jesus. No kidding. She was worried that because she needed it every day to get through the day, it had become an IDOL in her life. So she prayed about it and quit cold turkey. Even that small amount of pleasure had to be eliminated from her life.

From what we can see of their relationship, I would guess that both of the above are true.

I can quite imagine that all the cult members believe that they are making their choices for themselves. On the other hand, they all have regular one on one meetings with the leader who "loves them more than [he] trust them" and " lovingly shares" what God has laid on his heart about them.

[BullyJBG]

With knowing that Sarah knows about FJ, now I wonder if she reads here. Sarah, are you reading? Are we beating dead horses? Do we need to just eat them and shut up? Sorry, sweetheart, we just worry about you. Some here ARE your sisters in Christ, and we want the best for you. Is right now the best? Go through it all and please, if we are wrong, we hope we are able to see the joy of the Lord in you as they post. You are loved, ok?

[lilith]

With knowing that Sarah knows about FJ, now I wonder if she reads here. Sarah, are you reading? Are we beating dead horses? Do we need to just eat them and shut up? Sorry, sweetheart, we just worry about you. Some here ARE your sisters in Christ, and we want the best for you. Is right now the best? Go through it all and please, if we are wrong, we hope we are able to see the joy of the Lord in you as they post. You are loved, ok?

I very very much doubt that Sarah gets unsupervised Internet time.

[Sundaymorning]

I very very much doubt that Sarah gets unsupervised Internet time.

I think so too. But, if Steve really has to show her and Teri what kind of sites he visits on the internet, she might know about the forum. Because several members suspect that Stevehova does indeed read here.

On the other hand, I really can't imagine that Steve will actually show all the sites he visits to Sarah, because she might get an idea that there is a world outsite of Maxhell.

[Arete]

From what we can see of their relationship, I would guess that both of the above are true.

I can quite imagine that all the cult members believe that they are making their choices for themselves. On the other hand, they all have regular one on one meetings with the leader who "loves them more than [he] trust them" and " lovingly shares" what God has laid on his heart about them.

In my opinion, there is sometimes a tendency to make Teri more of a victim than she really is. She is very much a full participant in the victimization of her children. A college educated woman with parents and a sibling she could have turned to for help instead of having five more children because that is what Steve wanted. Her depression is not an excuse, she had an obligation to protect the children she already had. Instead, she has the reversals and basically has Sarah raise them. The kids taught themselves out of textbooks. The kids cleaned the house. The girls do most of the cooking and cleaning now. She allowed that monster to deny her children food. She scheduled young children in 15 minute blocks and punished them for being bored. Now she has the nerve to peddle that schedule every month and write vapid shit about having a meek and quiet spirit. She'd rather her children go hungry than not be a meek little wifey and remind her husband to bring home a damn pizza. She's a collaborator in the suffering of her kids. I can sympathize with her depression, but I don't believe it took away her agency.

[BullyJBG]

I guess that's part of Stockholm Syndrome, isn't it? Most critically-thinking adults will wonder, why it's okay for one adult to read this certain site but not another. And ask why. But, I think it's been discussed how Stevehovah reacts to being asked why. Part of the learning process, Steve. And YOU want your "children" to be "insatiable learners".......right? Nope, that horse isn't dead yet.

[Justme]

Today's the DAY!! 6/15!! I'm on pins and needles to find out if they have enough interest to take the dog and pony show on the road again!!! :P {sarcasm}

[FoxyMoxie]

In my opinion, there is sometimes a tendency to make Teri more of a victim than she really is. She is very much a full participant in the victimization of her children. A college educated woman with parents and a sibling she could have turned to for help instead of having five more children because that is what Steve wanted. Her depression is not an excuse, she had an obligation to protect the children she already had. Instead, she has the reversals and basically has Sarah raise them. The kids taught themselves out of textbooks. The kids cleaned the house. The girls do most of the cooking and cleaning now. She allowed that monster to deny her children food. She scheduled young children in 15 minute blocks and punished them for being bored. Now she has the nerve to peddle that schedule every month and write vapid shit about having a meek and quiet spirit. She'd rather her children go hungry than not be a meek little wifey and remind her husband to bring home a damn pizza. She's a collaborator in the suffering of her kids. I can sympathize with her depression, but I don't believe it took away her agency.

Have you ever had depression? Because it totally can take away your agency if it arises - as I think it likely did - out of an abusive situation. There's no question for me that Teri was groomed/manipulated by Steve, which totally would remove your agency. Abuse isn't just beating people up. Removing someone's agency is a key part of emotional abuse.

That's not to excuse the things that Teri has done wrong, by the way, or saying she had no agency at all, but abuse is well-known for making people feel powerless and unable to leave or change the situation.

[halcionne]

Have you ever had depression? Because it totally can take away your agency if it arises - as I think it likely did - out of an abusive situation. There's no question for me that Teri was groomed/manipulated by Steve, which totally would remove your agency. Abuse isn't just beating people up. Removing someone's agency is a key part of emotional abuse.

That's not to excuse the things that Teri has done wrong, by the way, or saying she had no agency at all, but abuse is well-known for making people feel powerless and unable to leave or change the situation.

I have depression and have been in an abusive relationship with depression, so I think about this a lot and go back and forth over whether Teri is a victim, perpetrator, or both in this fucked up family. I don't have much to add here, except to say that as much as I empathize with her illness and the terrible situation she and her kids were in--I have often wondered what I might have done in her situation--I had the strength and foresight to leave the relationship before I had a whole bunch of kids. I do feel like I had a smidgen of good luck, too, so I'm not patting myself on the back for being able to get out while Teri hasn't. I don't know, sometimes I feel like I could easily be where she is, then I stop and give myself some credit for putting my child's wellbeing first and leaving, which Teri didn't do. But I know first hand how hard it is to do when just getting out of bed is hard.

Like I said, I go back and forth. I do think she had more resources at her disposal than I did, but then I go back to thinking about how hard it is to use your resources when you're depressed.

This post isn't very productive. :lol:

[treemom]

Terri is both a victim and a victimizer.

[SPHASH]

New post up. Anna brags about how much they have bought for Operation Christmas Child and how everything was on sale.

[SPHASH]

Terri is both a victim and a victimizer.

Agreed. In her articles it's hard to tell if she is in a depressive episode or is just being a bitch. Last year in a Mom's Corner she downgraded teenagers and young adults calling them hopeless.

[kpmom]

Terri is both a victim and a victimizer.

That's how I see her too.

I used to give her a bit of a pass, figuring she really believes she is called to submit to Steve, and, as someone else pointed out, because of her depression.

But she wasn't born into that lifestyle. She did have options. Her parents would have helped her I think, and her sister. She also has a college degree, which is a whole hell of a lot more than her daughter's have.

Hearing her on that video (and other FJers who've heard her in person agree) she comes across as very confident. I think Steve would have submitted to her will if she had insisted on regular school for the kids, no vasectomy reversal, sports, friends, etc.

I think it was easier to go along with Steve during her post postpartum depressions, and that I understand. But as the kids got older she had to see their lifestyle is just not healthy.

[PearlKrabs]

The new post about Operation Christmas Child written by Anna made me :shock: I'm not an English teacher, but I'd put her at around fifth grade writing level. Isn't she in her mid twenties? Seriously, I'm actually kind of stunned.

Here's my imitation of her writing style:

Dear Freejinger,

Sometimes my husband and I make new things in the kitchen. We once made a quiche that was very good. Another time I burned the sweet potato fries. We have lots of fun. I made ice cream once. Last week we both made enchiladas.

Love,

PearlKrabs

I can hear my fifth grade teacher's voice now, (I just realized her name was Mrs. Maxwell! :lol: ) "I like enchiladas, too! Now, how about you pick two of those foods and talk about them in more detail in the paragraph? Then you could talk about a food that you'd like to make next." It really makes me sad that Anna didn't have nurturing teachers like her. Thank you, Mrs. Maxwell. I miss you. :)

[blessalessi]

In my opinion, there is sometimes a tendency to make Teri more of a victim than she really is. She is very much a full participant in the victimization of her children. A college educated woman with parents and a sibling she could have turned to for help instead of having five more children because that is what Steve wanted. Her depression is not an excuse, she had an obligation to protect the children she already had. Instead, she has the reversals and basically has Sarah raise them. The kids taught themselves out of textbooks. The kids cleaned the house. The girls do most of the cooking and cleaning now. She allowed that monster to deny her children food. She scheduled young children in 15 minute blocks and punished them for being bored. Now she has the nerve to peddle that schedule every month and write vapid shit about having a meek and quiet spirit. She'd rather her children go hungry than not be a meek little wifey and remind her husband to bring home a damn pizza. She's a collaborator in the suffering of her kids. I can sympathize with her depression, but I don't believe it took away her agency.

I kind of see two strands of abuse. At the time that Pepsi-gate happened Teri was suffering severe depression and back pain and Steve abused and manipulated her into going without meds or even Pepsi. He abused the entire family.

Teri gets my sympathy for the extent to which Steve abused her, but not for joining him and becoming his partner in the abuse of their children.

I guess the lines between victim and abuser are blurred, as these things generally are. But I have very little sympathy for what Teri continues to this day to spread to her grandchildren and any family that will listen to her.

[Palimpsest]

Another vote for Teri as both victim and abuser. She is not incapacitated by depression all the time - at least not these days. She is an active participant in Steve's "ministry." And she has a mean streak, IMO.

One of the things I dislike most about Teri is the way she preaches passive aggression as part of being a perfect submissive wife. Not reminding your headship about pizza is one example. Not pointing out that your headship has taken a wrong turn and letting him drive in the wrong direction for miles is another. That would not fly in the Palimpsest household. Of course I would never do that, but Mr. P. would be justified in being seriously annoyed if I did!

The Maxwells have a very flawed marriage and sick ideas about controlling their children, but set themselves up as a perfect example to others.

[ILoveJellybeans]

The new post about Operation Christmas Child written by Anna made me :shock: I'm not an English teacher, but I'd put her at around fifth grade writing level. Isn't she in her mid twenties? Seriously, I'm actually kind of stunned.

Here's my imitation of her writing style:

Dear Freejinger,

Sometimes my husband and I make new things in the kitchen. We once made a quiche that was very good. Another time I burned the sweet potato fries. We have lots of fun. I made ice cream once. Last week we both made enchiladas.

Love,

PearlKrabs

I can hear my fifth grade teacher's voice now, (I just realized her name was Mrs. Maxwell! :lol: ) "I like enchiladas, too! Now, how about you pick two of those foods and talk about them in more detail in the paragraph? Then you could talk about a food that you'd like to make next." It really makes me sad that Anna didn't have nurturing teachers like her. Thank you, Mrs. Maxwell. I miss you. :)

Its so sad to see how poorly they write. Its all Steve and Teri's fault. The idea that they don't read, they write is ridiculous. Reading makes you a better writer, as you can learn a lot from other people, and it gives you a better idea of how to write in ways that don't sound like a Maxwell. It doesn't help that they barely get any social interaction except for around their family-the speech patterns in the book come across as stilted and awkward, and if the only people they speak to are their similarly unsocialized siblings, it gets reinforced. Their writing would be better if they read some books and spoke to people more.

Trying to find an example of Mary's writing. I thought Sarah's sounded bad, but Anna is worse, so Mary probably can barely write her name.

[alba]

Its so sad to see how poorly they write. Its all Steve and Teri's fault. The idea that they don't read, they write is ridiculous. Reading makes you a better writer, as you can learn a lot from other people, and it gives you a better idea of how to write in ways that don't sound like a Maxwell. It doesn't help that they barely get any social interaction except for around their family-the speech patterns in the book come across as stilted and awkward, and if the only people they speak to are their similarly unsocialized siblings, it gets reinforced. Their writing would be better if they read some books and spoke to people more.

Trying to find an example of Mary's writing. I thought Sarah's sounded bad, but Anna is worse, so Mary probably can barely write her name.

blog.titus2.com/2014/08/02/sharing-christ-part-2-marys-thoughts/

It's not noticeably worse than her sisters', but that's sadly not saying much.

[Antimony]

All Mary's posts can be found here:

blog.titus2.com/author/mary/

Equally stunted.

[Elegant Mess]

Today's the DAY!! 6/15!! I'm on pins and needles to find out if they have enough interest to take the dog and pony show on the road again!!! :P {sarcasm}

Yeah, me too! :popcorn2:

I also found it amusing that there were no comments for that blog post when I checked it again a few minutes ago.

[kpmom]

Apparently it's ok to buy candy with the word Easter on the package, and stuffed Easter toys, but only after Resurrection Sunday, and only if the stuff's on sale. And only if it's for poor kids.

Will that candy really keep until Christmas?