Maxwell's lastest post

[WonderingInWA]

They look entirely too gleeful polishing cabinets. One could almost say it's become an idol. Watch it, Stevie! It's like Pepsi...

[thoughtful]

[gardenvarietycitizen]

Just got done reading the post and looking at their pics. Why do they have toilet paper in Joseph's bathroom when no one is living there to take a dump?

I thought Steve-O and Teri were using it as some sort of writing retreat?

...in which case there might indeed be fecal matter being produced on a regular basis.

[uber frau]

If he smiled broadly his faceplate would crack and fall off, revealing the wires and cogs beneath. He can manage a half smile on occasion, where the corners of his lips go up*, but there is a strict allowance of three a month.

* Under no circumstances may the 'smile' involve the eyes. This will result in circuit overload and instant meltdown.

[fundiefan]

They almost make me want to cry. The total and complete nothingness of their existence has got to be an insult to their god. No god created any being to live that way. It's ugly and sad and miserable and pathetic. And, to repeat myself, a total and complete waste.

[salex]

Their pictures always remind me of this scene in Airplane!

especially around the 1.26-1.30 point in the film.

[nelliebelle1197]

Gigi is Teri's mother. She and Teri's father live very close (either next door or across the street; I forget which). Teri's father is in poor health, so Gigi has her hands full taking care of him. Teri also has a sister who lives in the area, but the Maxwells seldom write about her or her family.

Teri's sister lives in Alabama

[Jana814]

Teri's sister lives in Alabama

Do u know if Teri has any other siblings? I know Steve has a sister & their mother lives by her. Does anyone know if Steve has any other siblings.

[divadivine]

If I were Joseph, I'd charge Steve and Teri rent for using my house (that they don't trust me to live in alone because God forbid, one of the unwed children got out of the compound and could fart in peace). Steve, you're a supreme asshat!

[Jana814]

P.S. those little girls know far to much about cleaning.... :(

Agree & it is sad. They should be playing w/ friends their own age not caring about cleaning.

[lilith]

It is nice to see the "boys" polishing cabinets, Stevie too. ;)

No why on earth did they go clean Mel's house? She's not knocked up (that we know). I could understand helping Anna or Gigi out, but Mel??? I'd be rather insulted if my MIL and SIL's showed up to clean my house.

P.S. those little girls know far to much about cleaning.... :(

As others have mentioned, I doubt Mel cleans to the stringent Maxhell standards. Why, when her fans are dusty she probably just turns them on instead of sending her daughters up the ladder for some busy-work.

And apart from the post that was obvious advertising, Abby and Bethany haven't been seen with chore packs. The might not even realise that their days should be scheduled in precise 15 minute intervals.

[gardenvarietycitizen]

If I were Joseph, I'd charge Steve and Teri rent for using my house (that they don't trust me to live in alone because God forbid, one of the unwed children got out of the compound and could fart in peace). Steve, you're a supreme asshat!

Well, to be fair he probably can't because he knows deep down all the various "money he earned to buy a house in cash" came from working for Dear Old Dad at probably better than market-average wages so he has a personal duty debt (if not any actual monetary debt) to Dear Old Dad.

...which just shows how weird this whole enterprise is, really.

[lilith]

Well, to be fair he probably can't because he knows deep down all the various "money he earned to buy a house in cash" came from working for Dear Old Dad at probably better than market-average wages so he has a personal duty debt (if not any actual monetary debt) to Dear Old Dad.

...which just shows how weird this whole enterprise is, really.

It wouldn't surprise me if Titus 2 Ministries is paying a rent to Joseph, that way they can claim it as a business expense. That could be why we were so explicitly told that Steve and Teri use it for business purposes too.

[16strong]

I really think the Maxwells are trolling us - today's post was about cabinet cleaning they did last month.

That was my first thought when I read this from the post:"Our first project was to polish the cabinets at our house. Not very exciting, you might think? Well, we had a blast talking and laughing as we worked." Sounds like they're back-handedly referencing FJ with the bit about cabinet polishing not being interesting. :lol:

[divadivine]

Steve, we know you read here... Put down that polishing rag & talk with us. Come out, come out, where ever you are, Stevie!!!

[terranova]

OMFG get those poor "children" out of that house NOW. Fucking cleaning cabinets my arse.

[gardenvarietycitizen]

It wouldn't surprise me if Titus 2 Ministries is paying a rent to Joseph, that way they can claim it as a business expense. That could be why we were so explicitly told that Steve and Teri use it for business purposes too.

Granted. If they were all in on it it'd totally work.

[uber frau]

That was my first thought when I read this from the post:"Our first project was to polish the cabinets at our house. Not very exciting, you might think? Well, we had a blast talking and laughing as we worked." Sounds like they're back-handedly referencing FJ with the bit about cabinet polishing not being interesting. :lol:

What's the bet the next blog post will be about the joy of eating animal crackers (but only two at a time). Or perhaps Sarah waxing lyrical about her love for bean burritos.

[WonderingInWA]

What's the bet the next blog post will be about the joy of eating animal crackers (but only two at a time). Or perhaps Sarah waxing lyrical about her love for bean burritos.

No, no, the ceiling fans are next. It's always the cabinets and then the fans immediately following. But burritos are on Sundays per the schedule, so that will come up soon. Oh, and don't forget, Poor Sarah's birthday is coming up this month (she'll be 32), so there will be a "big" celebration of that and her words of joy about continuing to be a SAHD.

[already hungover]

There were some amazing parodies along those lines in an earlier Maxwell thread. My favorite one, written by a poster whose name I have forgotten, was something like:

Dust, dust, dust the fans

Scrub them til they gleam

Cleaning them, cleaning them, cleaning them, cleaning them

Why is Dad so mean?

I posted a similar rendition:

Wipe, wipe, wipe the fan

Wipe it nice and clean!

Drudgery, drudgery, drudgery, drudgery!

Why is Dad so mean?

[LucySnowe]

I'm not. The theology in the Inferno is really, obviously, overtly Catholic. Also it's full of a lot of farting.

Heh, true. Also, it's a pretty finely-tuned delineation of hell, and it doesn't sound as though the Maxwells deal well with shades of meaning.

[ILoveJellybeans]

Steve, I know you will probably read this. You disgust me and what you are doing to your children is evil. The whole point of being a parent and raising a child is to help them grow up into productive members of society. You have failed. Sure, your kids aren't in jail, they don't do drugs, hurt others or sleep around, but they are not productive members of society. You cant keep your kids locked away forever. God created the world (well, I don't believe this, but you do) with loads of things to enjoy, explore and experience. You are just wasting your kids lives. Look at all the other Christians in the world, they love God and Jesus but have lives. There is nothing at all harmful about fun. God doesn't care how clean your kitchen cabinets are, it is just mindless filler that doesn't glorify God like appreciating the things he created does.

You believe that God created women to marry men and have a quiver full of children. How do you justify what you are doing to Sarah? Her fertile years are almost over and you have not yet allowed her to marry. You taught her that the highest calling for women is to marry and have a large family. You don't let her have that life, she must worry about this and feel that God is punishing her by not letting her live the dream you have planted in her mind. Please let her court before she reaches menopause, she would love to be a mother, and it would be cruel to not let her experience that. The right man is not coming along for her because you hide her away. You don't let men know that Sarah (or any of your other kids) exist. How did you meet Teri? Even in courtship, this happens because families meet eachother through church or other events, and feel their kids would make a good match. When was the last time Sarah met a single person her own age? Yes, siblings can spend time together and be friends, but you cant marry your siblings.

You need to give up control and let them go. Part of being a parent is preparing them for adulthood-teaching them how to be independent and look after themselves. Then, when your child grows up into an adult, you can be proud of what a hard working, thoughtful and productive adult you have created and know that they can go out into the world on their own and they will be okay because you gave them all of the tools they need. Using the arrow metaphor that the quiverfull movement likes, the point of having arrows is that when you have created the arrows, you let them fly. Theres no point in having arrows if you let the bow and quiver of arrows gather dust in the corner while you clean the ceiling fans.

Sometimes I fear it is too late for your kids. Your repressive lifestyle has crippled them emotionally and they don't have the tools they need to live an independent life. Being an adult and not having your life dictated to you in 15 minute blocks is scary when its all you have ever known. You need to slowly relax a bit and help them move into adult life, or the second you release these arrows, they will fall straight away and not be able to do the things that God wanted them to do. There are people who would like nothing more than to have their children be independent enough to live on their own, get a job, marry and have kids, but are worried this might not be able to happen due to their child's illness or disability. But you have perfectly healthy children, the only reason they are at a disadvantage in life and are nowhere near ready to live independently is that you have failed at parenting them and have neglected to give them the tools they need to be adults.

Steve, you suck.

[Savoring Samsara]

I posted a similar rendition:

Wipe, wipe, wipe the fan

Wipe it nice and clean!

Drudgery, drudgery, drudgery, drudgery!

Why is Dad so mean?

That's the one I remember! So awesome. I want to "like" that more than once.

[thoughtful]

ILoveJellyBeans, you are right.

But Steve doesn't care about any of that. He only cares about the idea that he has somehow magically prevented them from going to Hell when they die.

So let me add this -- Steve, I am no theology expert. However, I'm pretty sure that Jesus never prescribed a magic formula, a set of sure-fire actions and thoughts that will get someone into Heaven, detailed enough to rule their every moment.

You are doing it all in vain, so you might as well help your children to survive and enjoy life in this world. I don't think there's much danger, at this point, that they will go wild.

Not that he'll pay any attention to either of us. :(

[Handmaiden of Dog]

Holy crap. Their lives are so boring it's not even snark-worthy anymore. It's just depressing, pathetic and sad. Why ANYone thinks theirs is a lifestyle worth emulating is truly a mystery.

The Maxwells are new to me, so for the last couple of weeks I have been going through their blog and reading some of the old FJ threads. Last night I realized I couldn't look at their blog anymore, it is insanely dull. The same pictures of the same activities in the same poses over and over. Here are 10 pictures of the road taken from the bus. Here are the girls smiling, packing up the bus. Here are the girls smiling, unpacking the bus. Here are pictures of the 20 people who came to a seminar. Here are pictures of smiling girls in long skirts posed on top of a hill. Here are smiling girls in the kitchen cooking. Repeat, repeat, repeat, until the viewer wants to claw out her eyes.