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HijabiLady

megans-polyblog.blogspot.com/

 

I've been following this blog for about 2 years (give or take) and find myself mesmerized. I shall do my best to summarize.

 

Megan was raised in a very tumultuous home. Her father was a drug addict, meth to be specific among other drugs, and her mother didn't exactly protect her from exposure. Her father was arrested and incarcerated and eventually he died while incarcerated. In the meantime her mother started bringing boyfriends home and living it up as if she didn't have (at least) 2 children to take care of. Just recently Megan wrote that her father had raped her while high on meth when she was 16. I think this event led her to seek out a man who would protect her and also be like a father figure to her.

 

Megan hungered for stability, love and someplace to call home. She began researching the poly lifestyle, specifically, polygyny. She "met" a poly family online and eventually went to spend a week with them. They "love bombed" her and she fell for it, hook, line and sinker. The family was one man who was legally married to one wife and "spiritually" married to the second. I believe the man is in his late 30's, early 40's but he could be older. He has 2-3 children by his first wife (one of whom just married at age 17 to another person from their "church") and i believe 2 children by the second wife. At the time of meeting, Megan was barely 18 and very naive about how cults work. I don't believe she knew this family for more than a few months before "marrying" the man, whom she refers to as "Steve."

 

One positive note is that she went to Culinary school and got a chef's degree, so she does have a skill set if she ever decides to make a break for it. In the meantime she has given birth to g/g twins and very recently, a son. There also was a change in the family dynamic when the 1st wife decided she could no longer live the poly lifestyle. Incidentally this change occurred when Steve took a 4th wife (which he originally said he would not do because more than 3 is...greedy...or something.) The 4th wife has actually been married to another poly couple but there was a falling out and she left...and then stayed at Steve's house "while she healed from the break up." Um yeah...didn't see that coming a mile away, didja? So even though another wife was added they are still at 3 wives and 1 husband.

 

When the first wife was at home there were strict rules about wearing long skirts and other such fundy-ness. Now that she has left the building they will occasionally wear jeans and shorts. Let's not forget that they live on a sizable farm with no nearby neighbors to gaze longingly upon their fertile flesh. She spooks easily and has shut down her blog twice when the questions became pointed in the comment section. She was also busted putting up stolen u/s pics from the interwebz and passing them off as her twin pregnancy. So some people (myself included)wonder if any of this is true or just some elaborate hoax run by a bored housewife.

 

They are definitely quiverful in their "church" and do not use birth control of any kind. Megan has no secondary education outside of high school and no real support system among her biological family. It's quite sad, really. I think she will regret her choices in about 10 more years and basically be tied to a life which she can find no escape. Meanwhile her "husband" seems to be interested in finding pretty, young brides so he can fill his quiver. It's a trainwreck....truly.

Edited by OnceUponATime
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Deleted03

I'm confused you said she went to culinary school but she has no diploma outside of high school?

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masagoroll

I remember somehow reading or hearing about this blog before, and I heard that it was fake? It must have had to do with the fake ultrasound thing you mentioned!

But yeah, if true, it's so creepy I could die!

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NurseNell
megans-polyblog.blogspot.com/

One positive note is that she went to Culinary school and got a chef's degree, so she does have a skill set if she ever decides to make a break for it. ...................Megan has no secondary education outside of high school

Culinary training is secondary education after high school. It can get one a very good job. She'll need to keep up her skills, which should be easy with so many mouths to feed.,

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HijabiLady

I apologize, I realized after the correction that Culinary school is considered secondary education. That was one of the few things about her blog that relieved me, that she has a way to make a living if she ever leaves this life style.

Masagoroll,

Megan had defended the pic saying a friend had found it on the web and she thought that is was her own pic recovered from Kaiser's website. I am still scratching my head over that "reason."

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Waffle Time
ChunkyBarbie

She wrote that her baby boy was born four weeks early, but at his one month check up he weighed 10 pounds and whatever ounces. She wrote the doctor said that was underweight, blah, blah, blah. That doesn't sound right at all, that one month check up should have been around his due date. A ten pound newborn is not underweight.

The blog pings IMO.

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Deleted03

I feel like it sounds fake... what fundie blogger answers a question asking her if she was scared the first time she fucked her husband? O_o It all sounds very weird...

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aelar

The weight thing is certainly bogus. Babies lose weight after birth, and by the first month checkup, some are just a bit over their birth weight. With premature babies, they watch the weight more closely, but that's because they don't have a lot to lose, so they want to make sure early babies plump up. At 10lbs at one month, even a full term baby wouldn't be considered underweight, unless it was super super tall.

My girl was born three weeks early, a normal length, but skinny at 5lbs 10oz, about 5% of weight for height. She lost a bit the first week, but ate like a champ and was up to about 7lbs at her 1 month checkup, which put her solidly in the 25% of weight for height, and the doctor wasn't worried at all. It took another month at least for her to hit 10lbs, and she is chubby!

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amster

I swear this blog was posted over at the old board, and outed as a fake. I have definitely read this blog from start till about a year ago

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Effie

Hmm what are your thoughts on polygamy? I have had a negative view on polygamy... but I think I'm adopting more of a neutral view. I'm not sure what to think. In one way, I think it's up to consenting adults to choose how to live their lives. In another way, I don't think it's just to the children, to bring them into this. I don't know. Maybe I have just been biased and should be more open to some people choosing to live this way.

Well, what are your thoughts on polygamy in general? Negative, neutral or positive? And why?

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finleeport
Hmm what are your thoughts on polygamy? I have had a negative view on polygamy... but I think I'm adopting more of a neutral view. I'm not sure what to think. In one way, I think it's up to consenting adults to choose how to live their lives. In another way, I don't think it's just to the children, to bring them into this. I don't know. Maybe I have just been biased and should be more open to some people choosing to live this way.

Well, what are your thoughts on polygamy in general? Negative, neutral or positive? And why?

I'm pretty much against a man having more than one wife, it sounds piggish to me. If a woman had more than one husband, I find that hot :romance-inlove:

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Effie

I'm pretty much against a man having more than one wife, it sounds piggish to me. If a woman had more than one husband, I find that hot :romance-inlove:

Haha, actually I found a blog today about a woman who has two husbands. It was one of the commentators on Megan's blog.

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emmiedahl

We had a polyamorous woman on the old FJ board.

I don't think that polygamy is necessarily a bad thing, but there are definitely some inherent issues. If the adults all are willing participants and not coerced by people or religion, I don't feel like I really have the right to judge.

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Deleted03

Haha, actually I found a blog today about a woman who has two husbands. It was one of the commentators on Megan's blog.

url?

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Effie

lifewithmyboys-cat.blogspot.com/

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NurseNell

I don't think that polygamy is necessarily a bad thing, but there are definitely some inherent issues. If the adults all are willing participants and not coerced by people or religion, I don't feel like I really have the right to judge.

Dr. Phil had a polygamous family on last week. It was a family affair in that the 3 wives were related. There were twin sisters and their cousin. They had all grown up in polygamous families. They were LDS but had church at home. They dressed like the rest of us. Each woman had several children. One or two of the women worked outside the home. The husband owned several businesses. They had a very nice, large house, complete with a swimming pool. The kids went to public schools. They were all very articulate, no one seemed coerced. They have written a book called Love Times Three. I don't think I could live this lifestyle but it seems to be working well for this family so who are we to say it's wrong.

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oolong

I was in a poly (1 man, 2 women) relationship for four years. I was "second wife", although I didn't really consider myself married for most of that time. First wife was legally married to my current spouse and I did the handfasting at their wedding. Our relationship only lasted year after that however, and she divorced us by mutual decision although I wouldn't say it was particularly amicable. She is still kind of a member of the family though. You know, one you don't get on with too well, but we still help her out and she still visits occasionally, and communicates with our relatives. Polyamory, as we call it, wasn't part of a religious thing for us; it was just the matter that when my husband and his first wife got together, years before I came around, they decided they wouldn't be closed off the idea if it happened. And eventually it did. Technically, we're not closed off to the idea now, but it would have to be someone reaaaaally awesome. We're not searching for another spouse, so it's pretty unlikely to happen unless that changes. If anyone has questions about it, I could probably answer them but we're not as interesting as religious fundie polygamists!

I don't think polygamy is unfair to children. Consenting adults do have the right to live their lives as they choose, and when your lifestyle is unpopular people will always argue that it's unfair to the children. I'm not saying there isn't some difficulty involved, but a loving happy family of any structure is something I think we should accept in our supposedly free society. In my parent's generation, people said interracial relationships were unfair to children. Now, many people think homosexual relationships are unfair to children, but most of us on this board certainly don't think so.

That said, I'm glad it's just us right now with our young daughter (born 4 years after our divorce). And not because of anything inherently wrong with poly -- it's just that having a baby is hard enough without people treating you like an outcast and suspecting awful things of you just because you're different and they don't understand you.

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NurseNell
Polyamory, as we call it, wasn't part of a religious thing for us; it was just the matter that when my husband and his first wife got together, years before I came around, they decided they wouldn't be closed off the idea if it happened. And eventually it did. Technically, we're not closed off to the idea now, but it would have to be someone reaaaaally awesome. We're not searching for another spouse, so it's pretty unlikely to happen unless that changes. If anyone has questions about it, I could probably answer them but we're not as interesting as religious fundie polygamists!

I hadn't heard of polyamorous families until last summer when a new family moved into our apt building. The teenage daughter, K, told me her family was polyamorous. I asked her what it meant. She explained as her parents were married to each other, they shared a house with another married couple, who also had children. But the adults were free to have sex with each other. So some nights her Dad was in his wife's bed, some nights the other wife's bed; and same with the other husband. They had lived like this until they moved into our apt bldg a year ago. K's Dad and the other wife moved here together with his 2 daughters. The girl's mother moved back to MA. After a few month's here K's sister moved to MA to live with the mother. The woman who lives with her Dad has kids who live with their own Dad and a new partner. It all sounds rather confusing to me but K said it had been the only life she ever known so it seems normal to her. She doesn't like her mother and is happy living her with Dad and the non-stepmother. She does not want her referred to as her stepmother, she's her Dad's girlfriend. They seem to get along well. K is a very delightful girl, very smart. She talks to me quite often as she wants to go into nursing. She reports she know several polyamorous families.

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ladypuglover
The weight thing is certainly bogus. Babies lose weight after birth, and by the first month checkup, some are just a bit over their birth weight. With premature babies, they watch the weight more closely, but that's because they don't have a lot to lose, so they want to make sure early babies plump up. At 10lbs at one month, even a full term baby wouldn't be considered underweight, unless it was super super tall.

My girl was born three weeks early, a normal length, but skinny at 5lbs 10oz, about 5% of weight for height. She lost a bit the first week, but ate like a champ and was up to about 7lbs at her 1 month checkup, which put her solidly in the 25% of weight for height, and the doctor wasn't worried at all. It took another month at least for her to hit 10lbs, and she is chubby!

My youngest was 5 lbs 11 ozs and 15 inches born at week 35. He was so fat at birth that he had cankles which I loved. On his due date, we took him to his appt and he weighed 8 lbs and by 3 months he weighed 16 punds. Compare him to my oldest son born only a week early who weighed 6 lbs 2 ozs at birth 18 inches and at 2 weeks weighed 8 lbs 2 ozs.

My point is some preemies can be very fat at birth and some babies can gain weight very quickly. My nephew was 31 weeks and weighed 4 lbs 2 ozs which is huge for such a young preemie and my 4th son weighed 4 lbs 9ozs at week 35. 4 weeks apart in gestation but too close in weight. Also 2 more of my preemies weighed more than my only full term son. 6lbs 7 ozs and 6 lbs 8ozs for those two. Only my first and last gained weight well for the first couple of months but both did even though one was preemie.

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WanderingStar

Personally, as long as the polygamy doesn't involve underage girls being forced to marry church elders and be sexually assaulted, and it's between consenting adults, I have no problem with polygamous/polyamorous relationships. I don't think I could do it though!

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JesusFightClub

A lot of my pals are polyamorous. It sometimes seems to work out great, but when it breaks down it REALLY breaks down because there are so many people involved.

I've been invited to join a polyamorous relationship but it is just not for me. I thought I would get too jealous. I also really respect and like one of the women and I got the impression from her she didn't want another addition. That finished any thoughts of it for me.

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kunoichi66

I'm polyamorous myself....it takes some work, but it can work out if everybody values being honest and open.

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Effie
I don't think polygamy is unfair to children. Consenting adults do have the right to live their lives as they choose, and when your lifestyle is unpopular people will always argue that it's unfair to the children. I'm not saying there isn't some difficulty involved, but a loving happy family of any structure is something I think we should accept in our supposedly free society. In my parent's generation, people said interracial relationships were unfair to children. Now, many people think homosexual relationships are unfair to children, but most of us on this board certainly don't think so.

Well, I didn't just say it was unfair to children out of the blue. It doesn't have to be, but it can be. A man who has several wives and several children with each and one of them, is a situation which I find to be unfair to the children. Why? I don't think the man would have time enough for each and one of his children. I would classify that as emotional neglect from one parent. I'm not in favour of that.

Of course the woman probably would have time for her own children. That would make her more of a single parent. It's not wrong to be a single parent, but it's preferable to give the children two present parents. I don't think being a single parent is something to strive for. I think a child needs two present parents, if possible. However I have no idea how much the women would help each other in this situation. Perhaps they would be busy with their own children, or perhaps they would have time to help each other out.

For example, I find the Duggar situation to be unfair to the children. Too many children in the same household -> emotional neglect. Way too few parents -> emotional neglect or neglect in general.

(Who will provide for all these children?)

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lovefromgirl
I'm polyamorous myself....it takes some work, but it can work out if everybody values being honest and open.

What zie said. :)

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Meh
MrsKay

I remember finding the blog at the old FJ place, but can't find it now - for some reason, she popped into my head and I got curious about her. I'm not sure if she was a legit person, or someone jerking around, but she claimed to be the newest wife in a polygamous marriage, was still quite young, and supposedly had twin daughters. Anyone remember the blog I'm thinking of, and know if it's still around?

Edited by OnceUponATime
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