Political Memes, Comics, and other Shenanigans, Part 51

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"Tiny Balls And Retribution"

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Donald Trump has broken a lot of promises. He didn’t replace Obamacare with “something better.” Covid didn’t go away “without a vaccine” as he promised. He promised the rich, like himself, would pay more in taxes but his only legislative accomplishment was giving himself a huge tax cut. He promised he wouldn’t cut Social Security but later proposed a budget that would have cut Social Security. He promised to eliminate the federal deficit but increased it by more than 60 percent. He promised to hire only the “best people,” yet gave us goons and morons like Steve Bannon, Stephen Miller, Michael Flynn, Rick Scott, Ben Carson, Omarosa, and engaged in nepotism by hiring Javanka. He promised to bring down prescription drug prices. He promised to invest in the infrastructure. He promised to boost economic growth by four percent yet left with the highest unemployment rate since Hoover. He promised to bring back coal. He promised to “drain the swamp.” He promised to bring peace to the Middle East. He promised to end North Korea’s nuclear program but he’s still washing the taste of Kim Jong Un’s ass out of his mouth. He promised to end the opioid crisis. He promised to release his tax returns (HAHAHA). He promised he’d replace the nuclear deal with Iran and the Paris Climate Treaty with something better. He promised China would pay tariffs but instead, stuck Americans with a bill for $34 billion a year. And Mexico still hasn’t paid for a border wall. But it was his golf promise that was the leading indicator of just how full of shit Donald Trump would be throughout his tenure in the White House (sic).

During the 2016 presidential campaign, Donald Trump attacked President Barack Obama for playing golf while he was president. And Donald Trump, who not only plays a lot of golf but owns several courses, promised he would be “too busy” to play golf while he was president (sic). Trump broke that promise immediately and played golf 19 times in his first 100 days. In fact, Trump spent 307 days of his presidency (sic) playing golf at a cost to taxpayers of over $144 million. during the pandemic, Trump played more golf than he met with Dr. Anthony Fauci.

Trump didn’t just manage to break his golf promise but was also able to use it to grift taxpayers. He only played golf at his resorts which meant taxpayers had to foot the bill to government employees forced to travel with the president (sic). Trump even raised rates at his resorts to charge the government for the stay of employees. He rented golf carts to the Secret Service so they could follow him while he cheated at golf. Of course, nobody ate for free at Trump Resorts. The government had to keep rooms rented just in case Trump, as president (sic), would demand to make a golf trip on a whim which meant we were paying Trump to play golf even when he wasn’t playing golf. And since Trump has Secret Service protection as a former president (sic), he’s still grifting taxpayers while playing golf.

Golf is also an indicator of what sort of person he is because he cheats at golf. He even once stole a golf ball from a child. Golf is an indicator of just how lazy and lethargic Trump is because he would never walk his courses, instead, riding a golf cart. Golf is an indicator of how Trump respects rules and traditions because he violated all of them by driving his golf cart on the green so he could putt with his stolen balls.

The reason this is important to note is because Trump recently stated “I’m not going to have time for retribution” against his political opponents. Well, that’s nice. Last March in Waco, Texas, Trump said during one of his hate rallies, “I am your warrior, I am your justice. For those who have been wronged and betrayed … I am your retribution.” In the following months, Trump quoted Hiter and promised he’d be a dictator during his first day in office which underscored his retribution promise. But after facing constant criticism for promising to weaponize the Justice Department against his enemies (which he claims without evidence President Biden is doing), and talking and acting like a Nazi, not to mention reports of his most trusted goons planning his next administration to go after his critics, Trump decided to reign it in.

During a Fox News town hall, which he was able to attend despite trying to delay his New York fraud trial because Melania’s mother died, he said he wouldn’t “have time” for retribution. If you listen to his remarks carefully, it doesn’t mean he thinks it would be wrong to seek retribution and revenge, but just that he won’t have time for it. And then he said there would be “bedlam in this country” if the courts did not rule in his favor in the criminal and civil cases against him.

Meanwhile, his lawyers are arguing that as president (sic), Trump would have the right to send Seal Team 6 to murder his enemies.

So remember, when Trump says he won’t “have time for retribution,” he said the same thing about playing golf. Also, keep in mind, we’re only talking about retribution because Donald Trump brought it up.

To sum up, anytime Trump makes a promise, look at his relationship with golf and know that no matter what he says, no matter what he promises, he’s lying.

 

[ADoyle90815]

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I can’t stop laughing at this parody of the horrible “God made trump” video. 

 

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"Fake Immunity"

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It’s very hard to argue that Donald Trump is innocent of trying to steal the 2020 election he lost to Joe Biden.

There’s a recording of Trump and Republican National Committee Chairperson Ronna McDaniel pressuring the Wayne County Board of Canvassers in Michigan not to certify the results there despite no evidence of fraud. 

There’s a recording of Trump pressuring Georgia’s Secretary of State to “find him” 11,780 votes.

Trump tried to install fake electors to replace real electors that would certify the election for Joe Biden, who, again, won.

Trump, along with Rudy Giuliani, spread lies about election workers which led to them being harassed and receiving death threats from MAGA goons.

Donald Trump sent a mob of white nationalist goons to attack the Capitol while Congress was doing its constitutional duty of certifying the election.

Since he’s obviously guilty, because the argument it was his job to overturn an election he lost isn’t going to work anywhere, the only other argument to save him from a guilty verdict and years in a federal or state prison is he has immunity.

Three judges on the U.S. Court of Appeals in Washington, D.C. heard arguments last week over whether the Constitution makes former presidents immune from criminal prosecution. Richard Nixon also made an argument that it’s “not illegal if the president does it,” before resigning the presidency and receiving a pardon from President Gerald Ford.

People who have immunity don’t need pardons.

Special Counsel Jack Smith has charged Trump with four counts related to his attempt to overturn the 2020 presidential election he lost to Joe Biden.

In addition to arguing that Trump has immunity from charges and is free to break any law he wishes, Trump’s lawyer,  D. John Sauer, argued that prosecuting Trump now would constitute double jeopardy since he was already impeached and acquitted by Congress. The only problem with that argument is that it’s NOT double jeopardy as Congress is NOT a court of law. Even if the Senate had ruled Trump was guilty, it would not have issued any sentences other than removing him from office and preventing him from running for president again. Congress can only refer criminal charges to the Justice Department.

Trump’s lawyer argued that Trump could order Seal Team 6 to murder political opponents and sell pardons and nuclear secrets without the fear of prosecution, which is oddly specific.

Trump’s lawyer argued that presidents going unpunished after opening a Pandora’s box of horrible acts in the future wasn’t the real fear, but future presidents living in fear of being prosecuted after doing horrible things is the real worry. It seems to me that future presidents should be afraid of trying to overturn an election they lost, sending mobs of racist goons to attack other politicians, and attempting coups.

After Trump’s lawyer argued it was his presidential duty to try to overturn the election, one of the judges said, “I think it’s paradoxical to say that his constitutional duty to take care [that] the laws be faithfully executed allows him to violate federal laws.

Trump was actually present for this hearing and messaged to his base of troglodytes that President Biden was “forcing me into a courtroom in our nation’s capital.” Except that’s not true because Trump was not required to be there. He just wanted to use it to play the persecution card and as part of his campaign.

The real fear is that if Trump has presidential immunity and is returned to the White House, then what other horrible acts will he commit? If a court rules that Trump can’t be prosecuted while he’s president (sic) or after, then this nation is in real trouble. He could walk down to Constitution Avenue…sorry…golf cart down to Constitution Avenue to the National Archives Museum and burn the Constitution after taking a crap on it and not be prosecuted. He could declare martial law, destroy all voting machines, imprison all election workers, and not be prosecuted. He can roll up the Declaration of Independence to snort ten pounds of Adderall before issuing execution orders for every Democrat in Congress and liberal judge on the Supreme Court and not be prosecuted. He could change the national anthem to the Kars-4-Kids jingle and not be prosecuted.

Donald Trump should not be given immunity to be Donald Trump.

 

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"Frozen"

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There were expectations that the blizzard hitting Iowa would decrease turnout for the Republican caucuses on Monday. The political and weather prognosticators were right. Iowans talk about how tough they are and how they’re used to the cold January weather, but since these particular Iowans are Republicans, they’re liars.

The turnout last night for the caucuses was 110,000 which is just 15 percent of the 752,000 registered Republicans in Iowa. This is down from the 2016 turnout of 187,000, the 2012 caucus of 122,000, and the 2008 turnout of 120,000 voters. Donald Trump and his goons are boasting that he won nearly 50 percent, but the turnout can’t just be blamed on the weather. The other factor is lower enthusiasm. While MAGAts are very enthusiastic about Trump, their numbers are down.

Donald Trump is partially responsible for lower enthusiasm. And even with the enthusiasm he does have, he only took 49 percent, leaving the rest to Ron DeSantis, Nikki Haley, and Vivek Ramaswamy, who dropped out today. Asa Hutchison also dropped out today surprising many who didn’t even know he was in the race.

A lot of MAGAts are celebrating and claiming that Trump’s victory among 15 percent of Iowa Republicans is a major blow to liberals, Democrats, and the media when it’s not. Has Putin sent Trump a congratulatory note yet?

Donald Trump Jr called for his party to “end this nonsense,” meaning to dispense with the rest of the primaries and go ahead and install his father as the nominee. And that’s exactly what Trumpers want, to end elections and install a fascist dictator. They tried it on January 6, 2021, and they’re calling for it now. And when Trump loses the general election, I’m sure they’ll call for it again.

Republicans hate democracy. They may want to be careful where they stick their tongues. The nasty frozen flagpole poor Flick stuck his tongue to in A Christmas Story is a lot cleaner than what Iowa Republicans stuck their tongues to last night.

MAGAts will sing, “Licking Trump’s frozen ass never bothered me anyway.”

 

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[CTRLZero]

1 hour ago, GreyhoundFan said:

Honestly, this is me, lol.  So many lawsuits. 

[AnywhereButHere]

[47of74]

Reminds me of the old Jeff Foxworthy joke, "If you've ever gone to the family reunion to meet women..."

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