Erin and Chad 11: How Does Anyone Sleep?

[rebeccawriter01]

1 hour ago, JermajestyDuggar said:

My thing is that these people sell their lives online for money. It’s just that simple. And because they sell their lives for money online, it’s strange to completely leave out this one very obvious thing in their lives. 

It is strange. I work in PR and marketing (communications). You have to control the narrative or people are going to make up their own story about you. Like I said, she doesn't have to tell all. Nobody should expect her to come on the screen and start revealing all the family secrets. But if you want me to trust you and follow you, as well as buy your products, then you need to be honest that something is up. There is no way she didn't get questions about it.

[GreenBeans]

12 hours ago, rebeccawriter01 said:

Most of us have family or people in our lives we "put up with" to get through things.

And with so many siblings, it’s bound to happen! 19 siblings is basically like a classroom full of people. No one would expect any kid to like all its classmates equally, there will always be some you vibe with better than others. It’s these toxic fundie expectations that are the issue - siblings HAVE TO be “best friends” by default, because God made them siblings. 

[rebeccawriter01]

3 hours ago, GreenBeans said:

And with so many siblings, it’s bound to happen! 19 siblings is basically like a classroom full of people. No one would expect any kid to like all its classmates equally, there will always be some you vibe with better than others. It’s these toxic fundie expectations that are the issue - siblings HAVE TO be “best friends” by default, because God made them siblings. 

It's been a part of the Bates schtick all along. Kelly Jo would say such things as:

1. I know people with only one child and that child is lonely. My children are never lonely.

2. My children are each other's best friends. They are all so close. (But then in the next breath explain that on ILYD she paired up siblings who weren't close to buy gifts for each other and get closer). 

Now we hear it from the sisters that their children are so close in age that all of the cousins are going to be best friends. 

Bates, please stop perpetuating the myth that similar dates on a calendar and a strand of DNA makes you automatically compatible. In my best southern voice, "I have a cousin who I would piss on if she was on fire." We are 7 months apart in age and used to be friends until I realized I didn't like people like her (narcissistic liars who make me miserable). 

Edited February 16 by rebeccawriter01

[JermajestyDuggar]

19 minutes ago, rebeccawriter01 said:

It's been a part of the Bates schtick all along. Kelly Jo would say such things as:

1. I know people with only one child and that child is lonely. My children are never lonely.

2. My children are each other's best friends. They are all so close. (But then in the next breath explain that on ILYD she paired up siblings who weren't close to buy gifts for each other and get closer). 

Now we hear it from the sisters that their children are so close in age that all of the cousins are going to be best friends. 

Bates, please stop perpetuating the myth that similar dates on a calendar and a strand of DNA makes you automatically compatible. In my best southern voice, "I have a cousin who I would piss on if she was on fire." We are 7 months apart in age and used to be friends until I realized I didn't like people like her (narcissistic liars who make me miserable). 

It’s funny because I have 20 first cousins and only one is my best friend. She and I were born 4 months apart and have been thick as thieves ever since. Yet I do have some cousins I don’t like. Not many. Just a couple. And it’s because of their crappy personalities. I actually like most of my cousins. Thankfully. But a lot of us are really close in age. So we played together a lot as kids. 

[GreenBeans]

59 minutes ago, rebeccawriter01 said:

It's been a part of the Bates schtick all along.

I think it’s a (homeschooling) fundie thing in general. That’s how they justify controlling their kids by depriving them from friends outside of the family. “Oh, they don’t miss out on anything. They don’t need to go to school to make friends. They do have friends, of course! With all their siblings, their best friends are always right there!”

Much easier to isolate and brainwash children when there are no outside influences.

[Kiki03910]

Erin can't address any problems, even obliquely, because Erin has no problems. Erin is perfect and has a perfect husband and a perfect life. She's way too invested in her aura of perfection to ever admit to anything less. I mean, Carlin is a fucking twit, but I'd way rather have a coffee with her. Like, if you paid me to, but still.

[JermajestyDuggar]

1 hour ago, Kiki03910 said:

Erin can't address any problems, even obliquely, because Erin has no problems. Erin is perfect and has a perfect husband and a perfect life. She's way too invested in her aura of perfection to ever admit to anything less. I mean, Carlin is a fucking twit, but I'd way rather have a coffee with her. Like, if you paid me to, but still.

I also would choose carlin over Erin. Mostly because Erin just seems so fake and better than you. Like she would be judging you while smiling to your face. Carlin is just obnoxious and annoying. I can handle that better. 

[HereticHick]

I continue to be baffled that Erin and Chad allegedly moved to Florida to work with a church, and once they got there--**crickets** about the church.

[Bobology]

Could the church be so fundie and/or reclusive and/or abusive to some members (more than typical) that the powers or congregation do not want any of Erin's kind of publicity? Because the **crickets** are real. If they didn't really move there for the reason Erin stated, they would still be attending some church somewhere down there. Have there been family photos, a la Alyssa, of Erin's family at church? I hadn't even thought about it until @HereticHick brought it up.

Edited February 16 by Bobology

[gobucks]

Was there ever any proof they moved there to be with Chad's grandpa or help with his property? I can't remember. 

[Jackie3]

I have no idea how they support all those kids and animals. 

The videos of the kids/goats is cute, but so carefully curated. There's never any goat poop around. Of course toddlers and baby animals are cute, but she's created this fantasy that no one can match in reality.

[rebeccawriter01]

2 hours ago, Jackie3 said:

I have no idea how they support all those kids and animals. 

The videos of the kids/goats is cute, but so carefully curated. There's never any goat poop around. Of course toddlers and baby animals are cute, but she's created this fantasy that no one can match in reality.

My kids loved the idea of animals, pictures of animals, videos of animals, and driving by animals. They would also run and scream if one on one with an animal that wasn't a cat or dog (maybe even then at a younger age). 

I think it was in one of Trace's videos that Brooklyn was scared of a cow at Jane and Papa Bill's farm and was sure it was going to eat her. My bet is that quite a bit is left out in the editing. I would also bet there is some coaxing and bribing to get some of those shots. 

Much is made of how exploited Carlin and Evan's two kids are these days, but I would say Erin has trained her within an inch of their lives to be perfect in front of the cameras. They rarely interrupt, never question, and seem the same level of enthusiastic about everything. 

[Kiki03910]

On 2/14/2024 at 7:36 PM, Gobsmacked said:

Please could you do the catering for the FJ prayer closet? 

Tonight's prayer closet meal is a variant of shakshuka featuring tomatoes, pinto beans, cauliflower, sambal, garlic, and queso fresco. Served with mint-infused Greek yogurt, prosecco, and a side of snark.

https://www.theguardian.com/food/2018/oct/19/anna-jones-harissa-shakshuka-zaatar-flatbreads-student-recipes

Edited February 17 by Kiki03910
great, adaptable recipe added

[Smoochie]

On 2/16/2024 at 7:51 AM, JermajestyDuggar said:

I also would choose carlin over Erin. Mostly because Erin just seems so fake and better than you. Like she would be judging you while smiling to your face. Carlin is just obnoxious and annoying. I can handle that better. 

I'm with you. With Carlin you know what you're getting, an outgoing loudmouth, who sometimes you'd like to just shut up. With those type of people there's a time and a place where one can have a damn good time with them. With Erin, she's fake and I believe very shallow, all about what you see. Exactly like you said, Erin would smile to your face and then cut you from behind while spouting bible verses.

[rebeccawriter01]

Erin and Chad's video of I Love You Day is up. If you buy into the feuding sisters thing, this is full of passive aggressive snipes. 

1. Carson and Brooklyn are writing notes to each family member to give them at the party. Erin mentions a few siblings who will get one but certain siblings are left out. A person with better eyesight than me could look and see what names are in the pile on the table. 

2. Kids were so excited they slept with the luggage the night before they left. Chad says they were afraid of being left behind. There might be something to that.

2. No shots (other than maybe someone in the background) of Carlin, Zach, Whitney, Evan, Katie, or Travis at the bowling party. Erin sits next to her mother and Tori most all the time. Pics of Tori and Erin, Erin with her parents, and Erin with Lydia, Michaela, Tori, and Josie. Of note, Lydia is the only female wearing pants that is shown very much and that may be because she was bowling on the same lane as Chad.

3. The Bates house is decorated for the party. Old quilts, cast iron, gingham, guns, fiddles on the wall, etc. It honestly looks like Kelly used to decorate.

4. Chad mixed lotion and foundation as part of his costume. It honestly looked like he was going for blackface for a moment. I thought they were really getting real about their beliefs.

5. Tori and Josie are very pregnant.

6. We get that whispering voice of Erin being grateful. While she speaks we get pics of mostly the kids in costume. Tori's kids really don't smile. Carson doesn't either. There is one photo of some of Erin's kids and I think Brooklyn who has a horrible wig to be Marry is about to murder someone. 

7. Layla sighting when the kids are playing with the rolling covered wagon on the porch. 

8. Carlin does get mentioned when Lawson announces the awards. I thought they (Erin and Chad) might just edit that out. Then I realized they left it in because they beat Carlin and wanted that to be known more than just winning.

9. We see Evan when the guys were trying to mimic the sound. Couldn't edit him out since he is right in front of Chad.

10. There is a pic of Katie with Hailey blowing out the candles in the game.

11. Children are lined up to play a game. Layla is like her parents and can find that camera. Carson is at the back of the line looking like someone stole his best toy. 

12. The family gives Jane a framed photo of her and Bill that says Best Grandparents. Jane is appreciative and makes over the photo. Papa Bill's dementia and other issues are pretty clear here, as he doesn't interact with anyone and just sits staring. Like at Thanksgiving, he's still wearing his outdoor jacket and hat. Sad to see this once vibrant man.

13. Erin or Chad pans the room with the camera. We see a glimpse of Carlin and Evan. 

14. Nobody really listens to Kelly Jo.

15. Weird editing moment. We have Kelly Jo doing a monologue about the Biggest Heart Award. She is behind a table with gifts. Behind her are sealed Amazon boxes and trashbags that appear to be gifts. She says only the original 19 and spouses vote. Then cut to giving the award (Gil does his speech about how it should be Kelly who wins) and the gifts are gone. 

16. Michael wins. Gil calls her Michael Bates instead of her married name. Kelly corrects him. 

17. Voiceover where Erin explains that Papa Bill is not doing well. They take a photo of the grandkids (great-grandkids) with Bill and Jane. Babies are being held except Ryker. It appears Lydia (?) has placed him sitting on the back of the chair behind Papa Bill and is holding him up while crouched behind the chair. 

18. Erin closes out by saying how wonderful it was to have her grandparents there and how this could be the last time. She made me think of Carlin though with her way of wording how special they are to her (no mention of how special they are to all of the family or even her own kids). I'm glad they got to come to it though and that they appeared to have a good time.

7. 

[Bobology]

10 hours ago, rebeccawriter01 said:

14. Nobody really listens to Kelly Jo.

 This one is a winner!

[JDuggs]

It’s still so surprising to me that this rift between Erin and Carlin has gone on fo so long with no signs of ending. I just think that forgiveness and harmony would be such a big part of what they all believe in as Christians, but they don’t seem to have any problem showing the various alliances through their social media. I think most of their supporters are okay looking the other way and letting Erin and Carlin quietly not get along.

[HeartsAFundie]

11 hours ago, Bobology said:

 This one is a winner!

"Nobody really listens to Kelly Jo" is another great thread title.   

[SassyPants]

On 2/18/2024 at 7:48 PM, JDuggs said:

It’s still so surprising to me that this rift between Erin and Carlin has gone on fo so long with no signs of ending. I just think that forgiveness and harmony would be such a big part of what they all believe in as Christians, but they don’t seem to have any problem showing the various alliances through their social media. I think most of their supporters are okay looking the other way and letting Erin and Carlin quietly not get along.

I know I’ve said this many times on this site, but the kind of “Christianity” that some of these people endorse is foreign to me- 100% the antithesis of my beliefs and what my church endorses. As an example, our priest said least week that if you can’t open your heart to forgiveness, than you can not truly open yourself to the love of Jesus, because Jesus forgives YOU for all your transgressions, suffered and died on the cross for such…..who are you not to extend that same forgiveness to others, yet still loudly proclaim your faith???????

[nolongerIFBx]

18 hours ago, SassyPants said:

I know I’ve said this many times on this site, but the kind of “Christianity” that some of these people endorse is foreign to me- 100% the antithesis of my beliefs and what my church endorses. As an example, our priest said least week that if you can’t open your heart to forgiveness, than you can not truly open yourself to the love of Jesus, because Jesus forgives YOU for all your transgressions, suffered and died on the cross for such…..who are you not to extend that same forgiveness to others, yet still loudly proclaim your faith???????

I'm sure they wouldn't term it as unforgiveness. Probably boundaries. Maybe avoiding contact because  the Stewarts are a bad influence on the Paine kids? Depends on the issue, I guess.

[Adrienne83]

On 2/18/2024 at 10:48 PM, JDuggs said:

It’s still so surprising to me that this rift between Erin and Carlin has gone on fo so long with no signs of ending. I just think that forgiveness and harmony would be such a big part of what they all believe in as Christians, but they don’t seem to have any problem showing the various alliances through their social media. I think most of their supporters are okay looking the other way and letting Erin and Carlin quietly not get along.

Do we know why it even started in the first place? I feel like there’s a reason but I just can’t remember it. I remember them being so close, and Carlin was all upset when Erin got married. It’s sad I see that bond lost. ☹️

[JermajestyDuggar]

6 hours ago, Adrienne83 said:

Do we know why it even started in the first place? I feel like there’s a reason but I just can’t remember it. I remember them being so close, and Carlin was all upset when Erin got married. It’s sad I see that bond lost. ☹️

It was when Erin quit the BSB. I have to point out that Erin avoids Whitney as well. So I’m sure it has to do with the boutique. 

[Melissa1977]

Mainstream influence? Beliefs? Values? No. I'm sure it was all about power and money. Erin was the boss... The moment Carlin and Whitney said they wanted to take business decisions too, Erin was not ready to negociate. It's her way or the highway.

Of course, it's speculation.

[JDuggs]

My speculation is that BSB was mostly the concept of Erin’s. She brought in Carlin and Whitney as partners and they started outvoting her. Erin probably wanted to keep the business small and definitely keep the focus on modest clothing only. She wanted to do the work at night for a couple of hours while her kids were asleep. Erin probably had no interest in getting babysitters so she could work or taking business trips to meet with suppliers. Carlin and Whitney saw the potential of BSB being a real career and moneymaker. They were willing to expand the modesty standards to their own, not Erin’s, to grow the business. I think they basically forced her out of her own business because of Erin’s strict modesty standards and her smaller vision for the business. It was definitely a recipe for hurt feelings.

[gobucks]

5 hours ago, JDuggs said:

My speculation is that BSB was mostly the concept of Erin’s. She brought in Carlin and Whitney as partners and they started outvoting her. Erin probably wanted to keep the business small and definitely keep the focus on modest clothing only. She wanted to do the work at night for a couple of hours while her kids were asleep. Erin probably had no interest in getting babysitters so she could work or taking business trips to meet with suppliers. Carlin and Whitney saw the potential of BSB being a real career and moneymaker. They were willing to expand the modesty standards to their own, not Erin’s, to grow the business. I think they basically forced her out of her own business because of Erin’s strict modesty standards and her smaller vision for the business. It was definitely a recipe for hurt feelings.

I agree completely. She got butthurt when she got outvoted by them over decisions. Then, she got all whiny, preachy, and Jesusy about their modesty standards and said some super hurtful things like God hates you for showing your shoulders or whatever.