Jinjer 57: The Seemingly Infinite Seminary Rolls On

[onekidanddone]

Mr. OneKid’s grandparents had the male and feminine version of the same name and Mr. was named after his grandfather.
 

My husband has been going by a combination of his initials since he was really little. 

[patsymae]

On 12/5/2021 at 12:17 PM, cacophony_grey said:

I have two nieces named Charlotte, both of whom go by Charlie/Charley. Their second cousin is also a Charlotte who goes by Lottie. All three families really loved the name and wanted it. None of the girls seem scarred in any way by having a cousin with the same name.

I don't really get the notion that a name can't be used if a friend or family member already had a baby with that name. I find so much of the Duggars' beliefs and practices objectionable, but their name choices don't make the list for me.

I'm with you. At least until recently many Irish American families, for instance, named kids after relatives and/or favorite saints (so lots of intersection there). We have so many John's and Seans, including in-laws, I'm not gonna count them here. Two first cousins and a sister Kathleen, almost every girl has Mary or Marie for a first or middle name, a couple of Tims (I'm only counting first cousins and their parents here), two Jims (and a Seamus, which is James), etc., etc. When my mother got sick of it and picked the name Steven for her fifth (none in the family, "I'm gonna pick a name I like" ) people were genuinely perplexed. Where'd you get THAT?

[FiveAcres]

9 hours ago, patsymae said:

I'm with you. At least until recently many Irish American families, for instance, named kids after relatives and/or favorite saints (so lots of intersection there). We have so many John's and Seans, including in-laws, I'm not gonna count them here. Two first cousins and a sister Kathleen, almost every girl has Mary or Marie for a first or middle name, a couple of Tims (I'm only counting first cousins and their parents here), two Jims (and a Seamus, which is James), etc., etc. When my mother got sick of it and picked the name Steven for her fifth (none in the family, "I'm gonna pick a name I like" ) people were genuinely perplexed. Where'd you get THAT?

This sounds like my partner's Irish American family, except for the Steven. At least my inlaws changed things up a bit by using family surnames for the boys' middle names. (Which is evidently also a tradition in some areas.) My own partner's middle name is his mother's birth name, but it is also occasionally used as a boy's name. Most of the other's middle names are more unusual. The girls all have Mary in their names as well. 

[AprilQuilt]

On 12/8/2021 at 1:39 PM, SunnySide said:

I know someone who is number 12 of 13 children (family left a religious cult when he was 5). He goes by what would be his middle name because even though they’re all spread out in age he’s one of seven John’s in his family. It was just a common name they all liked; and kept reusing. 

this is done in quite a lot of religious families, eg French Catholics might prefix Jean and have brothers Jean-Marie, Jean-Luc, Jean-Jacques, Jean-Paul etc. My Scottish presbyterian family in C19th Canada did similar, brothers John James, John Alexander, John Murdo etc. They'd go by the middle name. It's like in Spanish-speaking countries where girls might be called Maria and then one of her titles and be known by the title, eg Pilar, Dolores, Guadalupe, Soledad etc.

[backyard sylph]

I have a cousin family I haven't seen in over forty years, but they and another cousin family seemed to be in some weird competition to have the most children...hmm. Anyway, I remember two things about that, one is that one family was prosperous while the other was not so much, though each was up to 12 or 13 children, and the other is that in one family all the girls were named Mary, with a different middle name. At least there are a lot of saints' names they could choose for themselves when they were confirmed. 

[SassyPants]

Per today’s Photo on IG, the Vuolos are in Phili. Going to keep putting distance between themselves and the TTH. Outside of a wedding, funeral or gender reveal, has Jeremy been to Arkansas since his wedding?

[libgirl2]

57 minutes ago, SassyPants said:

Per today’s Photo on IG, the Vuolos are in Phili. Going to keep putting distance between themselves and the TTH. Outside of a wedding, funeral or gender reveal, has Jeremy been to Arkansas since his wedding?

They were in Lancaster too for her birthday because they posted going to Dutch Haven for goodies. I was there about 14 years ago. 

58 minutes ago, SassyPants said:

Per today’s Photo on IG, the Vuolos are in Phili. Going to keep putting distance between themselves and the TTH. Outside of a wedding, funeral or gender reveal, has Jeremy been to Arkansas since his wedding?

Do you blame him? I wouldn't. 

[SassyPants]

40 minutes ago, libgirl2 said:

They were in Lancaster too for her birthday because they posted going to Dutch Haven for goodies. I was there about 14 years ago. 

Do you blame him? I wouldn't. 

Jeremy is a user. He used the Duggar name and likely money to try and parlay a media career, but now that it’s no longer of use to him, he cant be bothered. Maybe Jinger would like to spend the holidays with her family? If Jinger wasn’t such a wet noodle, I wouldn’t be as bothered, but I wonder if she just meekly always allows him to make all the decisions.

[Father Son Holy Goat]

2 hours ago, SassyPants said:

Per today’s Photo on IG, the Vuolos are in Phili. Going to keep putting distance between themselves and the TTH. Outside of a wedding, funeral or gender reveal, has Jeremy been to Arkansas since his wedding?

I don’t blame him. I pull the same move with my family; COVID has gotten me out of a funeral and a wedding so far.

[Meggo]

20 hours ago, Father Son Holy Goat said:

I don’t blame him. I pull the same move with my family; COVID has gotten me out of a funeral and a wedding so far.

I've gotten out of a bridal shower planned by CrazyAunt, maybe another few showers too? I don't mind...

 

[nokidsmom]

On 12/22/2021 at 4:31 PM, SassyPants said:

Jeremy is a user. He used the Duggar name and likely money to try and parlay a media career, but now that it’s no longer of use to him, he cant be bothered. Maybe Jinger would like to spend the holidays with her family? If Jinger wasn’t such a wet noodle, I wouldn’t be as bothered, but I wonder if she just meekly always allows him to make all the decisions.

I can see Jinger deferring to Jeremy and he makes the decisions, though this year, particularly after Joshley's conviction, maybe it's a good idea to avoid the TTH.   Emotions have got to in the stratosphere over there and can't really blame either Jeremy or Jinger wanting to walk into that lion's den during the holidays.

[SassyPants]

I’m not sure that the Vuolos have ever spent the holidays with the Duggars. Maybe one Thanksgiving, but it seems they always spend Christmas with his family and have gone to PA a number of times. At this point, maybe they never will- And of course, they have plenty of reason to avoid the dysfunctional Duggars. Avoiding rarely truly solves a problem-

[Idlewild]

After JB’s ‘amnesia’ about his daughters’ abuse on the witness stand, I’d have a hard time being around him and Michelle, and I certainly wouldn’t want my daughters anywhere near them.

[Bluebirdbluebell]

10 hours ago, SassyPants said:

I’m not sure that the Vuolos have ever spent the holidays with the Duggars. Maybe one Thanksgiving, but it seems they always spend Christmas with his family and have gone to PA a number of times. At this point, maybe they never will- And of course, they have plenty of reason to avoid the dysfunctional Duggars. Avoiding rarely truly solves a problem-

What problem would they be trying to solve? And would they really be able to resolve it if they showed up?

I doubt anything would change regardless of whether they show up. JB and Michelle have too many kids to care about any of them in particular. They don't want to change and they'll keep clinging to their cult and their parenting fails and their beliefs being the best, etc.  Michelle is loopy and JB is stubborn and they won't change. Her siblings either won't change or may need space to solve their own problems. 

I just don't see point in them going to Arkansas, especially when they saw the family at two weddings this year and there will probably be another wedding within the next six months (Jeremiah and Hannah). 

Edited December 24, 2021 by Bluebirdbluebell

[SassyPants]

Ive seen the comment many times here about how close Michelle and Jinger are. Maybe Jinger would prefer to visit with her mom over the Christmas holidays? Maybe all the decisions are Jinger’s, but I tend to doubt it. And if she wants to be an adult about her feelings, wouldn’t that involve talking to her parents, in person? I am sure there are things that all the children would like to say to JB and M, which I think would be best accomplished in person. What are the alternatives, an FU text, ignore the elephant in the room? Never speak to them again? 

[Father Son Holy Goat]

6 hours ago, Bluebirdbluebell said:

What problem would they be trying to solve? And would they really be able to resolve it if they showed up?

I doubt anything would change regardless of whether they show up. JB and Michelle have too many kids to care about any of them in particular. They don't want to change and they'll keep clinging to their cult and their parenting fails and their beliefs being the best, etc.  Michelle is loopy and JB is stubborn and they won't change. Her siblings either won't change or may need space to solve their own problems. 

I just don't see point in them going to Arkansas, especially when they saw the family at two weddings this year and there will probably be another wedding within the next six months (Jeremiah and Hannah). 

Which one is the Duggar, Jeremiah or Hannah?

[QuiverFullofBooks]

9 minutes ago, Father Son Holy Goat said:

Which one is the Duggar, Jeremiah or Hannah?

Jeremiah. The J name is kind of a clue. (You may have been thinking of Hannie, full name Johannah, who is 16 and single as far as we know.)

[Father Son Holy Goat]

1 minute ago, QuiverFullofBooks said:

Jeremiah. The J name is kind of a clue. (You may have been thinking of Hannie, full name Johannah, who is 16 and single as far as we know.)

That is what I was thinking of, thank you!

[Mama Mia]

18 hours ago, SassyPants said:

I’m not sure that the Vuolos have ever spent the holidays with the Duggars. Maybe one Thanksgiving, but it seems they always spend Christmas with his family and have gone to PA a number of times. At this point, maybe they never will- And of course, they have plenty of reason to avoid the dysfunctional Duggars. Avoiding rarely truly solves a problem-

Every Christmas  or Thanksgiving movie I’ve ever seen tells me that huge family gatherings are not the ideal time to try to solve family drama lol. 
 

I’d imagine if there was ever a year for Duggar’s and Duggar’s in law to find pressing reasons they REALLY need to bow out of the festivities - this would be it. Although it’s probably nice for the cousins to play

[JMO]

1 hour ago, Father Son Holy Goat said:

Which one is the Duggar, Jeremiah or Hannah?

This made me laugh harder than I should.  It's really hard to keep track of them all. 

[Idlewild]

Jinger posts to say that Jeremy is the best personal shopper- he always makes great selections for her. This gives me such controlling vibes- and I say this as a former prosecutor with over 30 years experience. 
Jana comments how much they miss her, but apart from brief visits for the inevitable weddings, I don’t think the Vuolos will be spending much time in Duggarland. 

[Mama Mia]

3 hours ago, Idlewild said:

Jinger posts to say that Jeremy is the best personal shopper- he always makes great selections for her. This gives me such controlling vibes- and I say this as a former prosecutor with over 30 years experience. 
Jana comments how much they miss her, but apart from brief visits for the inevitable weddings, I don’t think the Vuolos will be spending much time in Duggarland. 

I think Jinger just transferred her bestie bond with Jessa to Jeremy. Jessa and Jeremy are both opinionated, assertive people. Jinger very much likes having a leader. Which is fine, if the leader doesn’t trample on the followers needs and opinions. I just don’t know if Jeremy can maintain that long term. As an in-love husband to an adoring, pretty, meek natured wifey - sure. He can be supportive. But if his interest wanes, or she grows some differing ideas as time goes by  — I don’t know.

[EmCatlyn]

I agree.

On 12/30/2021 at 6:03 AM, Mama Mia said:

I think Jinger just transferred her bestie bond with Jessa to Jeremy. Jessa and Jeremy are both opinionated, assertive people. Jinger very much likes having a leader. Which is fine, if the leader doesn’t trample on the followers needs and opinions. I just don’t know if Jeremy can maintain that long term. As an in-love husband to an adoring, pretty, meek natured wifey - sure. He can be supportive. But if his interest wanes, or she grows some differing ideas as time goes by  — I don’t know.

A lot of people transfer their “bestie bond” to spouses.

I agree about the dangers here.  I was married to a benevolent narcissist, and everything was great until he got tired of playing the “good husband” role.  The circumstances were different.  I have never been a follower and my ex was not a control freak. (He just wanted other people to let him do what he wanted, admire him tremendously, and generally reflect well on him.)  However the “I have moved past this stage and so should you because this is all about me,” is very common with narcissists.

Edited January 7, 2022 by EmCatlyn

[Idlewild]

Jeremy is back at college, taking photos in class and laughing too hard at things the tutor does/says that aren’t that funny. There’s a Jeremy on every college course…..

A quick Google says tuition fees as about $25k a year not including books and living expenses. I wonder if he actually has a plan for his career in ministry or whether he is banking on being a full time celebrity.

[Father Son Holy Goat]

On 12/24/2021 at 11:57 AM, SassyPants said:I am sure there are things that all the children would like to say to JB and M, which I think would be best accomplished in person. What are the alternatives, an FU text, ignore the elephant in the room? Never speak to them again? 

Don’t knock the virtues of never speaking again, that can be some good stuff