Jump to content
IGNORED

[CW: Child Sex Abuse] Josh & Anna 30: LaCounting On to His Trial Date


choralcrusader8613

Recommended Posts

On Anna being reluctant or nervous to have the kids interviewed - truthfully, I don’t blame her. As was pointed out in the previous thread, some kids freeze and don’t say anything and act scared, some kids will word things in an incriminating way, even if they are benign- or at least just a chaotic bad day - and the 3 and 5 year old could say God knows what that isn’t even related to reality. 
They absolutely, 100% need to be interviewed, and by someone very good at their job...but I think most parents would be nervous about how one or more of their young kids would respond.  

  • Upvote 22
  • I Agree 10
Link to comment
Share on other sites

this lovely tweet: 

reminds us what Jimbob said about incest in the past

http://defamer.gawker.com/duggar-dads-political-platform-incest-should-be-punish-1706929035

Just this to engage in discussion to quote JimBob
"“rape and incest represent heinous crimes and as such should be treated as capital crimes."

  • Upvote 39
  • WTF 1
  • Thank You 3
  • Love 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, AliceInFundyland said:

 

@FilleMondaine I assume you are talking about the downloaded video? If so, thanks for that - I didn't want to look into it more than the brief glimpse I did see.

 

Exactly. It was a few threads back. It took me a few days (and nights and nightmares) with emotional breaks, but my trauma is such that I needed closure. I heard about it (here) and couldn't let it go. Sigh. Stories like this are tough for people like us.

Like someone else said, there are many survivors here. FJ is not a survivor support group, but if it helps others like it helped me, then, the least I could do is help that way.

In the meantime, let's keep up the pressure on this awful culture. I'm honestly agnostic on Anna until a year into his sentence. After some time away from Josh, and with court-ordered counseling, she should be in a better place to start making action. Until then, between the brainwashing and the Stockholm syndrome, I can wait.

  • Upvote 18
  • I Agree 1
  • Thank You 1
  • Love 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites

It would be nice to think that Anna has received some clear and emphatic guidance on how to carry out her "supervisory" role when Josh visits her & the children.

OTOH, would she be willing or able to to follow that guidance? And to what extent, if any, would the other adults in her sphere help her stick to said guidance?

 

  • Upvote 14
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, luv2laugh said:

Society doesn't talk about CSA in the way in needs to be discussed because the media, etc has largely implied CSA and predators only exist in a "stranger danger" narrative. We all know about the person with the lost dog in the van, the teacher, and coach... People don't like to think about sad things. Everyone thinks it won't happen to them. No one wants to think that someone we love such as a romantic partner/father/step-father etc. could be capable of viewing CSA like Josh, with desire.  Also, we are all aware of the "red flag warning signs" of a predator outside of the home, but not what these signs would appear to be if it were closer. I'm not sure Anna nor someone outside of fundamentalism would've known what the signs of this sort of predator look like, if it were within the immediate family.

I am disturbed, and shocked, (but at the same time, maybe more disturbed than shocked, given Josh's past as a minor). I'm surprised that a father of 6-7 kids under 12 is capable of downloading the CSA file Josh did.

You've already said this. Nearly word for word. I'm unsure what you are trying to accomplish here. 

  • Upvote 20
Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 minutes ago, Galbin said:

I literally spent 15 mins typing out a long post, but now it's gone thanks to phone thumb accidentally signing me out 

Anyway, just responding to @CinnaJenre: infertility and the Duggars. I grew up in a country where the only people who have kids in their 20s are people on long-term welfare* or minimum wage jobs. We were taught to seek fulfilment through our careers and that our 20s were for fun/travel. Everyone from teachers to doctors literally brainwashed us into thinking one of the worst things that could happen to a person was an unplanned pregnancy in their 20s - that it would ruin the best decade of your life. It was literally the Duggars in reverse.

I stumbled upon their show as a newlywed in 2014. I had lost my dream job and had a permanent disability that meant I could not ever get that career back. Since I was taught to define my worth by my career, that just killed me. The Duggars OTOH seemed so happy with their courtships, marriages, and babies that I began to consider that children/family could be fulfilling. It really cheered me up and made me think that having kids was just as worthy as having a career. So we set out to have kids.

It is now many years later and I have zero progeny. Fertility treatment did severe damage to my body and only resulted in miscarriages, while surgery for silent endometriosis also did nothing. As sad as it sounds I even bought into an angel card reader who told me I would be pregnant this spring. 

So I get it. I really do. Why do the Duggars and other abusive parents (including the pure scum who produce CSA images) get to pop out kid after kid when I can't produce even a small number of offspring? I wish I knew, but here I sit in a big empty house with a lovely husband and a uterus that is barren AF.

Sending love.

*This is not a shade against welfare because imo welfare is vital to society. And even if some people want to be on it forever it doesn't bother me as it's their lives to live as they see fit. It is just interesting that because they don't have careers they are taught to see value in other things. 

Thank you for sharing your story and I’m sorry you’re dealing with infertility as well.  It really drains you in every way imaginable, mentally, physically, financially.  Ours is unexplained-anatomically I’m fine, hubby is fine, hormones are good.  We have 12 frozen embryos left out of the 20 that tested normal.  They just don’t stick for some reason.  We have a plan to move on soon I f it’s not successful so there’s at least a line in the sand.  It’s so frustrating to see it happen so easily for people like the Duggas who seem to value quantity of children over quality of the lives they’re bringing into the world.  Jill and Derrick give me a little bit of hope -their religious beliefs are still problematic for me but at least she seems to have some agency over how many kids she has.  I am well out of my 20s and never thought we would have any issue getting pregnant.  I definitely took my fertility for granted. 

  • Upvote 3
  • I Agree 1
  • Love 40
Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 minutes ago, HarryPotterFan said:

Agreed. I’m Jewish and if I didn’t date guys with the same name as my brothers who have some of the most common Jewish names I’d be single forever*
 

* I’m still single forever but that’s not the point

The first time the mr. made an assumption and I said "no no, not that Uncle Joe.  That's Joe and JoAnne.  The other Uncle Joe, you remember, Joe and Anne" 
Created much chaos.  Not helped when Joe and JoAnne's son J.R. started going by Joe (he's Joe Jr). (there are other Joes, just for fun)

  • Upvote 2
  • Haha 38
  • Love 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

8 minutes ago, HarryPotterFan said:

Agreed. I’m Jewish and if I didn’t date guys with the same name as my brothers who have some of the most common Jewish names I’d be single forever*
 

* I’m still single forever but that’s not the point

Nah, you are a quirky little cutie pie. Someone will snatch you up!

  • Upvote 12
  • I Agree 14
  • Thank You 1
  • Love 13
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 minute ago, nelliebelle1197 said:

Nah, you are a quirky little cutie pie. Someone will snatch you up!

Aww thanks! ? I appreciate that. I hope it happens soon

  • Upvote 9
  • Love 20
Link to comment
Share on other sites

21 minutes ago, hoipolloi said:

It would be nice to think that Anna has received some clear and emphatic guidance on how to carry out her "supervisory" role when Josh visits her & the children.

OTOH, would she be willing or able to to follow that guidance? And to what extent, if any, would the other adults in her sphere help her stick to said guidance?

 

Its really minor, but I dont think Josh gets to visit them. Anna and the kids can visit him. I doubt it makes the least bit of difference, except that he doesn't go to their home and try to hide anything. From November 2019 to now surely their house wasn't without internet access in some form. Cell phones, computers, laptops, tablets? We know Josh was using a cell phone in Jessa's Christmas video and Anna had some device to post all the instagram posts. 

My big question is if Josh was notified and willing turned himself in, did he try to alter or dispose of any of those devices. Or were they now confiscated too?

 

  • Upvote 10
  • Thank You 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

2 minutes ago, Galbin said:

Same. I am nearly 41 now so the odds of it happening are extremely low. Whereas if I had grown up in another culture I might have tried for kids in my twenties, and actually succeeded. Instead, by the time I started I was 37 already. We wanted to try as soon as we married but I got extremely sick and was on teragenic (sp?) medicine for years, so we had to wait.

I really wish that you weren't dealing with this too. A big part of the reason I left FJ for a while was that everyone but me seemed to get pregnant on the TTC thread, along with Joy/Kendra/Jessa etc. 

Lol I left FJ for a while and fell down the rabbit hole of IVF message boards.  Talk about scary-a bunch of women hopped up on hormones arguing over whether there’s a second line on a pregnancy test or not.  Not for the faint at heart ?. As sad as I am to be back because of the nature of this Josh scandal,  FJ is a welcome respite from reading about fertility treatments. 

  • Upvote 17
  • Haha 4
  • I Agree 1
  • Love 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I've caught up!  Hello friends, old and new.  It's been a few years but I knew right where to go when Smuggar was the headline on my news feed.

I don't believe Anna will get divorced, as much as I would want her to.  It's amazing the amount of people I've seen just online who seem to think this is a conspiracy or misunderstanding.  

If Anna didn't want the kids to visit Josh, there is no way in hell the judge would have permitted it.  I can sort of understand a mother wanting her kids to see their dad (if they wanted to) but if I was a woman in her situation and believed he was guilty of the charges, I would want a true 3rd party chaperone, like a social worker or law guardian.  There should be a 2nd set of eyes for Anna with the number and ages of the kids in tow.  Anna could go to help one in the bathroom, and Josh would be left with the kids.  He might not be touching them but he could try to coach them for interviews about things he has said and done.

I'm hoping he goes to prison for at least 15 years. That would put all of his kids out of his sexual preference range and also Anna out of her childbearing years.  Their continued marriage saves us all from reading about the courtship JB would no doubt have lined up for him on the outside.  I'm guessing young, fertile, and even more sheltered than Anna.

 

 

  • Upvote 22
  • I Agree 4
  • Love 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, Hashtag Blessed said:

Was going to say the same. It’s really not a clue to anything other than how much they distrust outsiders. They might think he’s totally innocent but are worried about the kids being coerced into giving false statements, which honestly isn’t unreasonable at all.

But idk, they haven’t shown much concern for the safety or wellbeing of any children ever, so they might just not care if they’ve been abused or not, and would rather it remain unknown if they were, to protect the brand.
 

This is why I’m concerned. I can definitely understand Anna might not really be sure what to do right now. I can imagine she thought she understood what he was arrested for, but I’m sure she wasn’t prepared to learn just how awful her husband’s proclivities are. If she is scared of what she might find out when the kids are interviewed, I get that. I can also understand wanting to protect her kids from anything she’s not familiar with right now. 
 

 I’m just afraid of it being a ‘circling the wagons’ thing. Even with reports to police, we saw how the family treated the four family victims of Josh. Anna, Josh’s former victims, and the M kids could all really benefit from (science, not religion -based) therapy right now, and this isn’t a promising start to accepting help. 

  • Upvote 13
Link to comment
Share on other sites

59 minutes ago, EmCatlyn said:

If we start getting snarky about people who marry (or date) people with the same name as their close relatives, we are seriously restricting the romantic options of those unfortunate enough to have very popular/common names or who are the children of parents with very common/popular names. ?

My dad has a common American guy name (think Dave/ Bob/ Jim / Mark/ Tom).  My sister started dating a guy with the same name a couple of years ago and they are still together.  My niece, daughter of my sister, also started dating a guy with the same name a couple of years ago although they have since broken up, but for a few months we had one of them in each generation.  

  • Upvote 10
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I hadn’t considered JB marrying Josh off to some innocent young girl were he to get divorced.  The thought makes my stomach turn.  Are there any well known fundie divorces?  Admittedly I only skim the other fundie threads, Duggars and Bates are more than enough for me sometimes.  If fundies divorce are they shunned by the church community like other religions?  I’ve been reading a lot recently about the Hasidic Jewish community another insular patriarchal group. There are a lot of parallels between the two groups in the way women are viewed/treated.  I highly recommend watching Unorthodox or Shtisel on Netflix, both were fascinating. 

  • Upvote 12
  • I Agree 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, CinnaJen said:

Lol!  Now I see it-what the hell kind of game is that?  I don’t watch the show either, I thought maybe they were at the zoo or something.  He’s a hot mess.  

I didn’t see the picture but remember the throat poke episode. They went on a marriage retreat vacation to Costa Rica . A couple there counseled each of them separately - wife to wife and husband to husband.

For some reason the husbands put rebar between the hollow of their throats and I guess it will bend if you keep walking toward each other. It only sort of worked and clearly was not the illustration it was meant to be, because I have no idea what it was supposed to mean about being a husband. 
 

So business as usual in Duggarland. 

  • Upvote 8
  • Eyeroll 1
  • Haha 5
  • Thank You 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

15 minutes ago, BlondeAgent007 said:

Their continued marriage saves us all from reading about the courtship JB would no doubt have lined up for him on the outside.  I'm guessing young, fertile, and even more sheltered than Anna.

Oh God, I hadn’t thought about that. I actually don’t think it would happen. He’s got loads of grandchildren already with more to come. He doesn’t need to be supporting any more of Josh’s kids, or maintaining two households for Josh’s former and current wives. My guess is that Josh will be in prison for a long time, and then he will either live with Anna or alone afterwards. Hopefully he can get some therapy and education in prison.

  • Upvote 16
Link to comment
Share on other sites

I can't think of any fundie divorces off the top of my head, but I would think the blame and shame would lie with the filer.  Josh won't be filing, so it would be Anna doing it.  Anna would be the one betraying her word "for better or for worse".  Anna would be the one seen as unwilling to forgive.  If JB can find someone to house this creep, he can surely find some fundie with a daughter to spare who could use some cash or a leg up in the fundiesphere.

  • Upvote 7
  • Sad 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Do you all remember Jared from Subway who was imprisoned on similar charges?  He was sentenced to 15 years and is still in prison.  It looks like they won’t consider parole until he’s served 13 years.  If Josh is found guilty he will likely spend a good amount of time away.  

  • Upvote 17
  • I Agree 1
  • Thank You 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

ETA: Comments below point out this is a statement after the first scandal. Still asinine. But I didn’t read carefully. 
 

Duggar pastor weighing in https://people.com/tv/duggars-pastor-ronnie-floyd-on-josh-duggars-scandal/?amp=true&__twitter_impression=true

This is asinine: “All of us were surprised by the news because ... their reputation in Arkansas is that they are a very Christian family.” 
 

Pastors of all people know that people hide or carry terrible secrets.

I wish he’d rather have talked about how churches can try and be safe for children. 

 

 

Edited by neuroticcat
Took out screenshot of quote
  • Upvote 14
  • Eyeroll 3
  • WTF 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

7 minutes ago, neuroticcat said:

Duggar pastor weighing in https://people.com/tv/duggars-pastor-ronnie-floyd-on-josh-duggars-scandal/?amp=true&__twitter_impression=true

This is asinine: “All of us were surprised by the news because ... their reputation in Arkansas is that they are a very Christian family.” 
 

Pastors of all people know that people hide or carry terrible secrets.

I wish he’d rather have talked about how churches can try and be safe for children. 

 

 

What an incredibly tone deaf comment!

  • Upvote 10
  • I Agree 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Destiny locked this topic
Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.



  • Trending Content

  • Recent Status Updates

    • Kiki03910

      Kiki03910

      https://arstechnica.com/space/2024/03/finally-engineers-have-a-clue-that-could-help-them-save-voyager-1/
      GO SCIENCE.
      · 0 replies
    • Kiki03910

      Kiki03910

      I love baseball but I'm dreading the new season because the White Sox ownership is THE FUCKING WORST. I watched Dominican League Baseball (Lidom!) over the winter and fell in love with their joy, spirit, and exuberance. The broadcasts were in Spanish and my Spanish is pretty weak but I loved catching phrases and repeating them. Bombe! I'm sad about MLB and Commissioner Idiota's busywork rules. But I love baseball, always and forever.
      I guess I don't have a point. Just bitching. Te amo mucho, Lidom!
      · 0 replies
    • WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo?

      WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo?

      Happy International Women's Day!

      Humanity may have some work to do, to improve gender equality, but I was glad to hear that France has taken an important step to protect healthcare for women (and people of other genders who can get pregnant). 
      (The links are just to a UN page and the AP News.)
      Anyhow, love to y'all!
      · 0 replies
    • Giraffe

      Giraffe

      Feeling ragey this morning. I have a doctor's appointment this afternoon in the hope of getting help for an ongoing injury. I went to a (different!!) doctor late last year who completely blew me off. He wouldn't do diagnostic testin, he refused to send me to a specialist, and he just told me to "take it easy" and "take ibuprofen." I'm hopeful for today's appointment but I'm also feeling a SEVERE amount of rage at that doctor from last year! 
      · 6 replies
    • BlackberryGirl

      BlackberryGirl

      Well, the rash is back with a vengeance. It never completely cleared up. I saw the derm yesterday and they did another swab and yup, raging infection again, still? It is definitely strep skin infection. I am getting so damn tired and run down from this. Who the f would immagine being hospitalized freaking TWICE for a rash? 
      · 2 replies
    • 47of74

      47of74

      So angry right now.  If I could return to Luxembourg tomorrow and renounce my citizenship in this stinking shitpile of a country I would.
      · 0 replies
    • PennySycamore

      PennySycamore

      My niece is going to be a seat filler at this year's Academy Awards.  Seat fillers are asked to wear tuxedos regardless of sex/gender.  If you see a pretty young woman with very curly hair, it could be my niece. 
      · 2 replies
    • 47of74

      47of74

      Yeah, that's me.  Though to be fair I am trying to learn Italian and Spanish.

      · 0 replies
    • Kiki03910

      Kiki03910

      IT'S BASEBALL SEASON!!!!!
      ⚾❣️
      · 5 replies
    • mango_fandango

      mango_fandango

      It’s not supposed to be mosquito season right now but I still appear to have been bitten twice on the side of my foot. Bastards. I know I shouldn’t scratch but it’s so tempting… 😑
      · 0 replies
  • Recent Blog Entries

×
×
  • Create New...

Important Information

By using this site, you agree to our Terms of Use.