Dillards 64: Now with Multi-Level Marketing!

[VBOY9977]

1 hour ago, ViolaSebastian said:

I thought this as well--it seems to be a bit of clever wordsmithing on FFF's part. Yes, technically, it has been deleted because Instagram stories only last 24 hours. 

Jill also posted a picture to her feed and it’s not there anymore

[SapphireSlytherin]

I think the Dillards are much more controversial than the Bateseseseseseses. Derick and his overt asshattiness, bigotry, insensitivity, boorishness has rubbed off on JillyMuffin's rather benign social media presentation.

FFF probably got a shit-ton of flak (yes, FLAK, not "flack") over the Dillards, whereas the Bateseseseses are likely less "known" to mainstream 'Merica.

[Sky with diamonds]

I kind of feel sorry for Jill, then I think of what Derick has stated, rather twiiter raged about...he has put her in an awful postion. 

[bella8050]

I don't follow the Bates family, but I'm going to guess cutting ties with Jill would be more about Derick's turd stained Twitter and not their general beliefs which would be harder to give evidence on if someone was going to complain about them being a paid promoter. To complain about Jill all that needs to be said is "Google Derick Dillard".

[LawsonBatesEgo]

I think Derick wasn't ready for marriage and fatherhood. He can post all the posed pictures he likes on Instagram but in every video Jill has posted, he seems to be hating every second of interacting with the boys. I strongly suspect he a regretful parent who thought parenthood was what he wanted, but when the reality of raising children hit, he found themselves wishing he made a different choice. I don't think he HATES the boys - I am sure he loves them in that way a parent loves their child, but I think that if with the knowledge of what he knows now, if he had access to a time machine, he'd go back to 2013 and make different choices and not marry Muffin and have the boys. I also think that once the honeymoon period wore off with Muffin, he realized he was stuck and didn't like her as much as he thought he did.

I know a couple of people who regret parenthood but love their children. They say that while they love the children themselves, they really hate the job of parenting and all the sacrifices and poop and expenses it entails and if they truly understood what they were signing up for, they wouldn't have gone for it.

I think Law School is Derick's way of avoiding being around his wife and children and going back to the fun college days he looks back on so fondly.

[FleeJanaFree]

Derick's view of the library is...himself with his hands in his pockets?

sounds about right.

[eye_browz]

I feel bad for Jill. I bet she wanted to do the Fit Fab Fun company because it was a way for her to earn HER OWN money and create an identity for herself (outside of her kids/family/husband). It would have kept her busy while Derrick is in law school. Unfortunately, the opportunity was taken away from her, due to her husband's past actions.

I bet she will not pursue any other social media partnerships because she fears that she will be fired. 

Counting On was taken away from her as well, due to her husband's actions. She loved being on TV and was the main spokeswoman for the older girls.

She has been attempting to create her own identity and she's been stepping outside of the box recently, as evidenced by the nose piercing, showing shoulders, and wearing jeans.

Hopefully, she can continue to find herself through other avenues. Perhaps, she should consider nursing or another medical certification.  She needs to pick something that no one can take away from her.

[LawsonBatesEgo]

1 hour ago, SapphireSlytherin said:

I think the Dillards are much more controversial than the Bateseseseseseses. Derick and his overt asshattiness, bigotry, insensitivity, boorishness has rubbed off on JillyMuffin's rather benign social media presentation.

FFF probably got a shit-ton of flak (yes, FLAK, not "flack") over the Dillards, whereas the Bateseseseses are likely less "known" to mainstream 'Merica.

I think this is exactly it. Most people know who the Duggars are at this point - they are those people where the parents covered up the brother molesting the little sisters, and where the son then cheated on the pregnant mother of his children with chicks from Ashley Madison while hypocritically preaching about "family values".

Most people don't know who the Bates are. And the Bates, IMO, have done a better job of remaining "scandal free" and therefore escaping the attention of mainstream Murica.

[HideousGreenShirt]

This thread makes me kinda sad.

I recently re-watched Jill's wedding episode and cannot believe the difference in these two. Not the usual maturing/growing as we've seen with Benesssa and JinJer etc. 

In the episode Derrick is so... Sedate. The way he speaks and forms sentences is so very different. I'm not a Degreed Medical Professional, but watching him barely focus and quietly mumble through his TH's makes me wonder if he was on anti anxiety meds or similar. 

I said before that I thought one of the reasons for him seemingly going off the rails so spectacularly was the sheer number of extremely emotional events occurring in his early twenties. His dad died, he got caught up in a whirlwind TV show and romance, his mom got sick, immediately after his giant televised wedding Jill is pregnant, Joshley scandals, his ongoing dental/health issues, flip flopping between countries, mystery surrounding Sam's birth. Its a lot to cope with in a small amount of time.

That being said, he has shown himself to be a hateful and irresponsible person so my sympathy for him is pretty low. 

[KnittingOwl]

7 hours ago, PennySycamore said:

i'm not sure if any health insurance coverage that he might have as a student would also cover his family.

I had health insurance as a graduate student. There was an option to add on family, but it was insanely expensive. I can’t picture the Dillards paying for it. 

[LawsonBatesEgo]

51 minutes ago, HideousGreenShirt said:

I said before that I thought one of the reasons for him seemingly going off the rails so spectacularly was the sheer number of extremely emotional events occurring in his early twenties. His dad died, he got caught up in a whirlwind TV show and romance, his mom got sick, immediately after his giant televised wedding Jill is pregnant, Joshley scandals, his ongoing dental/health issues, flip flopping between countries, mystery surrounding Sam's birth. Its a lot to cope with in a small amount of time.

That being said, he has shown himself to be a hateful and irresponsible person so my sympathy for him is pretty low. 

I agree with this. A lot happened when he was in early aduldhood. Some of these things are beyond his control (his father's passing, mother's illness, his own health issues, difficulties with Sam's birth, finding out his wife was molested as a child) and some of them were his won choices (getting married, moving to Central America, fatherhood), but you're right that he had a lot of significant life changes and difficult events happen within a few years. Going through a lot of big things in life can cause people to start acting very differently - and do things like quit their stable jobs, and it can make them question decisions - I honestly think he has questioned his decision to marry Muffin/have kids at least a few times.

But he has just proven himself to be such a terrible person that I find it hard to muster up a single scrap of empathy for him. The only reason I hope he gets his shit together is not for his benefit, but for the sake of his wife and sons.

[HarryPotterFan]

1 hour ago, HideousGreenShirt said:

His dad died, he got caught up in a whirlwind TV show and romance, his mom got sick, immediately after his giant televised wedding Jill is pregnant,

I wonder if he would have rushed into marriage and kids if his mom wasn’t sick. He wouldn’t be the first person to rush into marriage so that their parent could be there. He also wouldn’t be the first to rush to have kids so their parent could become a grandparent, or at least pass away being happy one was on the way. Though refusing to use birth control makes rushing into having kids inevitable. 

Jill lost her TV show because of him. Jill lost her sponsorship because of him. She loses what she loves and can’t earn money because of him.

[nst]

Just now, HarryPotterFan said:

 

Jill lost her TV show because of him. Jill lost her sponsorship because of him. She loses what she loves and can’t earn money because of him.

and now will she lose her husband because she wants more kids and he is in school as a child himself. 

 

[LawsonBatesEgo]

1 minute ago, HarryPotterFan said:

I wonder if he would have rushed into marriage and kids if his mom wasn’t sick. He wouldn’t be the first person to rush into marriage so that their parent could be there. He also wouldn’t be the first to rush to have kids so their parent could become a grandparent, or at least pass away being happy one was on the way. Though refusing to use birth control makes rushing into having kids inevitable. 

Jill lost her TV show because of him. Jill lost her sponsorship because of him. She loses what she loves and can’t earn money because of him.

I have seen this happen with a cousin and it didn't end well.

He also wouldn't be the first person to rush into marriage out of a fear of being "alone". Cathy's health was very grave at one point, and while he had his brother (and he seems to have a good relationship with Dan), he was facing the prospect of being an orphan in his early 20s. That is definitely the kind of thing that leaves someone vulnerable to rushing into a poorly thought out decision, and now perhaps that Cathy is doing well and the dust has settled a bit on everything with his life, he is realizing he rushed into it all too fast and wasn't ready for it.

[PennySycamore]

16 minutes ago, HarryPotterFan said:

I wonder if he would have rushed into marriage and kids if his mom wasn’t sick. He wouldn’t be the first person to rush into marriage so that their parent could be there. He also wouldn’t be the first to rush to have kids so their parent could become a grandparent, or at least pass away being happy one was on the way. Though refusing to use birth control makes rushing into having kids inevitable. 

Jill lost her TV show because of him. Jill lost her sponsorship because of him. She loses what she loves and can’t earn money because of him.

We had a marriage like that in our family.  The mother of my niece's fiancé had terminal cancer and so they hurried up the wedding so that she might be there.  The marriage did not last.  

[just_ordinary]

I am actually sorry for Jill loosing the FFF partnership. As others said- Whitney and Alyssa probably believe the exact same things. They are just better in hiding it. It’s all looks over substance.

That people feel the need to interfere with Jill‘s „work life“ which results in her loosing her „job“ primarily because of her husband‘s actions is a bit much for me. She never was a good fit for the brand for many reasons (unlike W&A who seem hip, sweet and did publicly show that they indeed like fitness) but it is very hypocritical to call her out on her misogynistic believes but be fine with W&A as FFF partners. I hope the people who contacted FFF on her account also complained about the other two. 

I wonder how she deals with stuff like that. It must have an effect to loose two jobs because people you don’t know personally complain about you/ your husband goes of the cliff. And the permanent criticism (earned and BEC) in her social media. Wouldn’t be surprised if she suffers from some kind of stress syndrome- I totally would. 

Enough empathy- because I really detest their believes and actions.

[Dandruff]

I think their marriage was spawned from ego and greed.  I imagine Jill was thrilled to be the first Duggar daughter married, Derick got his fundie virgin and lots of positive attention (before the negative attention piled on), and JB got a seemingly loyal, devoted son-in-law and I'm sure extra $$s from the improved ratings.  I also view them both as competitive know-it-alls, but believe those attributes have been hidden behind their gender role playing. 

I suspect they'd both be a lot happier if they hadn't gotten together.  I really don't think they're compatible, and that it's costing them to keep trying.

[Shadoewolf]

The thing about the covenant marriage is they aren't as stuck as some might think. All Derick would have to do is move out of Arkansas and fulfill the residency requirements in a different state (Oklahoma and Texas are border states and theirs are 6 months), and he could file in his new home. Jill would have no say in it at that point.

But oh the scandal if Derick just up and left Jill and the boys for what he thinks would be greener pastures. As if he's not hated enough now...the leghumpers would go ballistic and Jill could have a very solid plotline to re-enter the show. The pity factor would be HUGE. 

***NOT that I wish that on Jill and the boys. NOT. AT. ALL.  Though I could see Jill making the single mom thing work IF she wasn't cast out by her family for getting divorced and had their support.***

[LawsonBatesEgo]

2 hours ago, Shadoewolf said:

The thing about the covenant marriage is they aren't as stuck as some might think. All Derick would have to do is move out of Arkansas and fulfill the residency requirements in a different state (Oklahoma and Texas are border states and theirs are 6 months), and he could file in his new home. Jill would have no say in it at that point.

But oh the scandal if Derick just up and left Jill and the boys for what he thinks would be greener pastures. As if he's not hated enough now...the leghumpers would go ballistic and Jill could have a very solid plotline to re-enter the show. The pity factor would be HUGE. 

***NOT that I wish that on Jill and the boys. NOT. AT. ALL.  Though I could see Jill making the single mom thing work IF she wasn't cast out by her family for getting divorced and had their support.***

Honestly, if Boob and J'Chelle would be supportive of her, a divorce would probably be the best thing for Jill in the long run, once she got past the initial hurt and "shame" factor. She would be free of Derick the Trainwreck (she is clearly not happy with him), she'd have tons of sympathy from the leghumpers, a way back onto the show, and she could move back to the compound for a while and have family support, and since J'Chelle The Lost Girls will be made available for baby sitting, maybe while they watch Izzy and Sam, she could get herself a PROPER qualification in being a doula or a midwife or something and actually do something for herself.

And Dewreck would be screwed because Boob would cut him off in an instant for what he did to his precious golden child JillyMuffin. Good luck finishing law school when your father in law isn't bankrolling your life anymore AND basically everyone hates you more than they already did.

[adidas]

I think they got married for the simple fact that they were attracted to each other and wanted to have sex. It is so common amongst the conservative evangelical crowd - get married young because they’re full of raging hormones, then a few years later they find they’re not compatible at all and they’re stuck with someone they don’t like very much  

[LurkerOverThePond]

I was just thinking... what was the first sign that Derick was not the prince charming we hoped he would be? I don't remember clearly, but was it him trying to sled over that poor cat?

[squiddysquid]

Sure grief makes you do a lot of things, my dad suddenly died when I was 19. I get that everybody grieves in their own way and maybe marriage was a way to seek stability.

But grief doesn't make you a homophobic asshole. And it doesn't excuse Derrick attacking a transgender minor on Twitter unprovoked.

He doesn't get an out for dragging his unvaccinated baby and pregnant wife to a country where Zika Virus is raging.

Also the soliciting of funds for his "missions" and using them for private stuff.

Yes, Sam's birth must have been traumatic. But again their choice. They should have learned their lesson after Izzies birth at the very latest. Still they attempted another complicated homebirth under shady circumstances and waited far too long to go to the hospital.

[HarleyQuinn]

15 hours ago, VBOY9977 said:

So someone on tumblr posted this exchange with FFF on Facebook...

What's the source on this?

[PainfullyAware]

Derick is such a zealot and so deep into his ideology that I doubt he is self-aware enough to really question marriage or parenthood. Going back to school after going on missions after quitting his job absolutely shows his dissatisfaction with the lifestyle he's chosen. He's clearly searching around for something other than a stable job, white picket fence and large family.

But my guess is he interprets that dissatisfaction or unhappiness as not yet finding what God's plan for him is. Or he interprets it as Jill and the boys not behaving the way they should. Or maybe that the devil is getting into his head. But my guess is the last thing he thinks about is that he should get a divorce, or that he questions whether procreating is the right thing to do. Having kids after all is the bedrock of their faith.

[QuiverFullofBooks]

20 minutes ago, PainfullyAware said:

Having kids after all is the bedrock of their faith.

Actually it’s the bedrock of the IBLP/ATI/Quiverfull cult, not their actual faith, which is Baptist. Plenty of people at CrossChurch use birth control. Derick has never really seemed interested in the breeding-for-Jesus thing. He agreed to it under Jill’s influence, but I’m guessing he’s totes OK with Jill’s c-sections keeping them from having a bunch of kids.