Lori Alexander 47: Frugal ... Sort of ... For a rich person

[ladyicantxplain]

7 minutes ago, SilverBeach said:

Yeah, I find this model of marriage very unappealing. To each her own, I suppose. I wonder if there is a big age difference.

I was married to a man who was sixteen years my senior.  He demanded that I cover my tattoos with makeup before I was allowed to enter church with him, lest anyone see that The Preacher's Wife had sinned so gravely as to put ink on my temple years prior to marrying him.

I think there is something to the age difference thing, sometimes, with women who desire this type of marriage.  I don't think it's a hard and fast thing that all women married to authoritative types are looking for an older man and have a daddy complex, however.

[zeppelincommander]

Re: fundamentalism and infantilizing: modesty teachings are an excellent example of this.  Women are objects and men are testosterone-filled toddlers.  Shitty views of humanity all around.

[kpmom]

My husband is 9 years older than I am and I saw a little of this paternalistic stuff early in our marriage. 

Nothing major, but some little "you need to do this" type stuff.

I remember getting a recall notice in the mail for something on my car and he kind of waged the notice at me saying, "You need to take of this" in a very paternalistic kind of way.

I let him know never to talk to me like that again and he learned very quickly that we are equals, not father and daughter!

[Koala]

She has a real knack for serving food that looks like it's already been digested.

 

[kpmom]

ITA, that soup does not look appetizing at all.

Plus, if you're going to make something called Chicken Pot Pie Whatever, it needs to have the pie part...a nice flaky crust.  Otherwise, isn't just vegetable soup?

[polecat]

2 hours ago, FundieCentral said:

That’s not emotional labour, that’s what I call labour  

To clarify -- that was a direct quote from the article.

16 minutes ago, Koala said:

She has a real knack for serving food that looks like it's already been digested.

That "pot pie" soup looks vile.

Maybe it belongs in the "pot."

[Lgirlrocks]

5 hours ago, Koala said:

I don't know how to break it to anonymous, but she has just successfully described a parent/child relationship.

Parents set rules because they love their children and have their best interest at heart.  They know that their child's brain is not fully developed and they are not yet capable of self governing.  

That said, those rules are slowly removed as the child ages and begins to display self control/good decision making.  Then one day they're grown and you've worked your way out of a job.  They are adults, and they no longer need you to tell them what's in their best interest- they know.  

If this woman doesn't have the self discipline to behave like a responsible adult, then she shouldn't be married/parenting.  She's merely a child in an adult body.

She married a father, not a husband.

I have no problem with this as long as he does the same for her. Asking her permission to spend extra money on things like going out with friends. Sadly that’s probably not how it is. I couldn’t imagine having to ask someone permission to spend money or when I can take phone calls. The biblical headship was about protecting women, it wasn’t safe for them. It wasn’t about lording over them. 

[polecat]

1 hour ago, ladyicantxplain said:

I was married to a man who was sixteen years my senior.  He demanded that I cover my tattoos with makeup before I was allowed to enter church with him, lest anyone see that The Preacher's Wife had sinned so gravely as to put ink on my temple years prior to marrying him.

I think there is something to the age difference thing, sometimes, with women who desire this type of marriage.  I don't think it's a hard and fast thing that all women married to authoritative types are looking for an older man and have a daddy complex, however.

Interesting thoughts ... 

Having grown up in a fundy family, the last thing I wanted was yet another person controlling my actions. And I never dated anyone significantly older than me. Everyone was right around my age, except for my husband. And he's 5 years younger (I didn't know that when we got together, though). 

 

[Gemini]

Lori doesn’t like to eat out y’all, but she does it numerous times a week to sacrifice herself to Ken’s desires. Obviously she only blogs her restaurant food so we can all see her selfless act of not having to cook...

@Krissy  in response to your unfounded, very horrific, opinions on suicide, you have seen freejinger members offer support, prayers, advice and love towards other members that have so bravely come forward with their stories. I hope that you can have the grace and humility to open your eyes and stop being so judgemental and cruel. Lori is incapable of love, change and compassion,  I hope for your sake that’s not the same for you. 

 

[SuperNova]

In today's post, Lori uses the phrase "I believe" four times. To me, it makes it abundantly clear that what she "teaches" is not god's prescription but Lori's own personal interpretation. "I believe" is not the same thing as truth, not even truth in love. 

[wild little fox]

Lori says we should be willing to work hard in the kitchen making healthy food for our families. But Lori, if I understand it correctly you didn't make that soup, your sister did. 

 

[feministxtian]

1 minute ago, wild little fox said:

Lori says we should be willing to work hard in the kitchen making healthy food for our families

Its 107F here in the desert today...I ain't working period. TOO DAMN HOT

[Demonfan]

I might have mentioned before that I work for a non profit that provides mental health services to at risk and low income individuals. If anyone feels as though they need help, please, please, please reach out to someone. There are free helplines and organizations that can help at reduced cost. Your PCP should be able to help you access these resources. I know that it's not that easy, and I am not trying to be glib about it. I hope that anyone who is feeling as though they need to speak with someone will. We are all worth it.

[feministxtian]

2 minutes ago, Demonfan said:

I might have mentioned before that I work for a non profit that provides mental health services to at risk and low income individuals. If anyone feels as though they need help, please, please, please reach out to someone. There are free helplines and organizations that can help at reduced cost. Your PCP should be able to help you access these resources. I know that it's not that easy, and I am not trying to be glib about it. I hope that anyone who is feeling as though they need to speak with someone will. We are all worth it.

YES!!!! There's also something called "a federally qualified clinic" that provides care and uses a sliding scale. That's what I'm using right now...they literally saved my life. 

If you want help finding help, please let me know...I'm pretty good at hunting shit down. Your city or county health department is another place to start looking. 

I will happily furnish my cell # upon request...

[Loveday]

44 minutes ago, kpmom said:

ITA, that soup does not look appetizing at all.

Plus, if you're going to make something called Chicken Pot Pie Whatever, it needs to have the pie part...a nice flaky crust.  Otherwise, isn't just vegetable soup?

Well, there IS a Pennsylvania Dutch version of chicken 'pot pie' that doesn't actually have a crust. It's made in a big kettle or pot, with lots of chicken, thick chicken broth, and homemade square noodles. You can add veggies to it, but the base is always the chicken, broth, and noodles, and it's sooooo good! 

I'm trying to figure out how Lori can call this nasty-looking concoction chicken pot pie when there doesn't seem to be any CHICKEN in it! 

[SuperNova]

Did anyone else read the soup recipe? She claims that it's "a LOT of work". Yeah...no. It reads like any other recipe. I cook 95 percent of our meals from scratch and that recipe is hardly a LOT of work. One odd thing about it, it calls for saving the chicken skin and blending it up to add to the soup. I love making soup and I'm always looking for something new. I've never come across a recipe that calls for blended chicken skin. The thought of liquifying blubbery slow cooker chicken skin is revolting.

  

[FundieCentral]

1 hour ago, polecat said:

To clarify -- that was a direct quote from the article.

Sorry yes, I know! I don’t know how to do the quote in quote thing. but my comment was meant to be a funny response to the part in the original text where men asking women to cook them things is emotional Labour, because despite my utterly lacking cooking skills, I very much see the time and effort all the lovely people feeding me put into it! (#husbandsthatcancook #notaproverbswoman) 

[saintmom]

1 hour ago, Koala said:

She has a real knack for serving food that looks like it's already been digested.

 

I've been to several autopsies where those were featured....just saying.

[Maggie Mae]

Here is the recipe she used: https://simplyrealfoods.blogspot.com/2018/06/chicken-pot-pie-soup.html?m=1

I think i would change it up a bit. I'd roast the chicken, then use the bones & skin to make chicken stock. (If you don't know how, it's basically just boiling the carcass that's left with some carrots and onion and spices, remove everything and run it through a fine mesh ... thingy). For the actual soup I'd start by making a mirepoix, then adding chicken stock, chicken, fresh herbs, and then veggies that are appropriate for chicken pot pie. So probably potatoes, onions, celery, carrots, peas, corn... stuff from the midwest that is normally found in a chicken pot pie. Probably a bay leaf, salt, pepper. If i was feeling really ambitious I'd do the mirepoix in garlic & butter and add flour, then add the chicken broth and milk and reduce everything before adding in meat & veggies, then more milk. 

Top with something like parsley so it looks nice. Oh, and you can make a topping by either making a pie crust from scratch or just getting a premade one, cutting it into strips, and baking that. 

At no point should anyone ever put chicken skin through a vitamix and add that to any soup. 

[Koala]

Lindsay- Your husband's controlling behavior isn't all that uncommon- in abusers.

If you are still in need of regular "discipline", then I would suggest that you're in no position to be raising a child.

[Loveday]

43 minutes ago, Maggie Mae said:

Here is the recipe she used: https://simplyrealfoods.blogspot.com/2018/06/chicken-pot-pie-soup.html?m=1

Thank you. I'm relieved to see that there IS chicken in the actual recipe.

[Demonfan]

WTF!!? That blog post from Lindsay G. is heart breaking! Is there no one in her life to help her? So sad.

[Sarah92]

I'm sorry but that soup looks like no chicken pot pie that I've ever seen and it's like a classic dish here in the Midwest.                   ( Judgemental look at blended green stuff) . I've seen some chicken pot pie soups that look tasty and none of them are green.... And some might like it but I can't imagine what a soup with both cauliflower and cabbage smells like.  But after reading that recipe, quite honestly that seems like adding unnecessary work to blend the soup to make it creamy or whatever they are going for. Just leave the veggies as and maybe blend about two cups of broth with the chicken skin and put that back into the soup. No need to fool yourself into thinking that's chicken pot pie lol. Doesn't mean its a bad tasting soup but call it what it is, a chicken and veggie soup. But no, that soup isn't really a lot of work. The chicken is literally cooking for eight hours, plenty of time to do other stuff. The only thing that is work is that completely unnecessary extra blending step in my honest opinion. Now I wanna go make myself a creamy chicken pot pie.  

[Koala]

18 minutes ago, Sarah92 said:

The chicken is literally cooking for eight hours, plenty of time to do other stuff delete comments.

Fixed that for you.  

I have never seen a chicken pot pie soup, but I did plug it into Pinterest to see what would come up.  What Lori made looks ummm....nothing like anyone else made.  
 

[Chocolatedefrauded]

Ugh, only Lori could be so navel-gazing about food! I’m pretty sure God does not care what we eat. We are not engaged in the Holy Olympics here, getting points for making everything the most special and saying it’s for God. We all eat several times a day and food is not some sign of our faith....