Lori Alexander 47: Frugal ... Sort of ... For a rich person

[fluffy]

11 hours ago, Liza said:

Did all of her kids move far away?  Anyone know?  

Two did and two live in their area. I  think it will be telling whether their son's family, who live in San Diego area, moves along with them.  Her daughter Cassi lives in Houston because her husband is in dentistry school there. 

5 hours ago, ladyicantxplain said:

f Lori really believes she should be teaching women Titus 2, and Titus 2 alone, the public blog needs to come down immediately and so does the facebook blog page.  The menz will go there and engage, and then she's violating her own doctrine.  But we all already know this.

There are ways to password protect a blog so that ONLY women can see it, by vetting members as she does in the ALCR.

It appears she WANTS men to endorse this crap to guilt the women into subservience out of fear.

The other factor is that Ken writes a lot of his crap under her name for her blog.  I think he writes for her a lot. They are duplicitous. 

[ladyicantxplain]

12 minutes ago, fluffy said:

The other factor is that Ken writes a lot of his crap under her name. He writes for her a lot. They are duplicitous. 

So women are having what they believe to be private conversations in a women's only Chat Room, but Ken is writing responses there under Lori's name?  I've often wondered if it was happening; I've seen his actual posts under his actual fb name.  I've also wondered when the tone suddenly changed in the middle of a thread in the Chat Room if it was KEN getting in there and putting in his .02. 

 

Why don't they just use a JOINT FB ACCOUNT?!?  Then at least the women would know both of them are reading and/or replying.

I'm disgusted that Ken could possibly know that much about my life now...

[fluffy]

1 minute ago, ladyicantxplain said:

I'm disgusted that Ken could possibly know that much about my life now...

To be honest, I do not know if he is the chatroom as her. I kind of doubt it because she is in there ALL DAY. It's nuts to me. I meant writing her blog posts and some of her responses. I am sorry I alarmed you and apologize.  

[ladyicantxplain]

1 minute ago, fluffy said:

To be honest, I do not know if he is the chatroom as her. I kind of doubt it because she is in there ALL DAY. It's nuts to me. I meant writing her blog posts and some of her responses. I am sorry I alarmed you and apologize.  

Oh, no, there is no need to apologize, though I appreciate how considerate you are.  You ROCK. 

LORI actually intentionally and without my permission, outed my NAME to the entire internet by posting a link in some crap blog post she wrote over a year ago, using quotes from me in The Chat Room.  So much for a "closed room"...just found this out a short while back, after getting ballsy enough to come in here and actually post instead of merely lurking.

So I guess I should get over the thought that Ken knows about me and my marriage. 

Cool. I finally figured out how to make those weird eye emojii.  

[FundieCentral]

I can’t help but think that Lori just confuses submission with respect/deference/consideration.

Elaboration: I value my newly minted husband’s opinion dearly. I ask him about issues in my life. I ask him before I plan things or do things, not because I need his permission but because we’re a team, and I don’t want to be running around like a chicken with its head cut off. When we have conflicts, I sometimes stand down or let it go - not because I have to, but because I don’t want to fight about minor things where we could be enjoying our time instead, and if I care 5% but he cares more then we choose his preference. Same the other way round. So in many ways I submit to his preferences/opinions/ideas - but not because I have to, but because marriage is teamwork and involves reigning in my ego in order to be a good wife to him. And all of these things go 100% the other way, too. Also, before the “wives, submit to your husbands” part this is what Ephesians says first (so that’s the context for anything else): 

6 Let no one deceive you with empty words, for because of these things the wrath of God comes upon the sons of disobedience. 7 Therefore do not become partners with them; 8 for at one time you were darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Walk as children of light 9 (for the fruit of light is found in all that is good and right and true), 10 and try to discern what is pleasing to the Lord. 11 Take no part in the unfruitful works of darkness, but instead expose them. 12 For it is shameful even to speak of the things that they do in secret.13 But when anything is exposed by the light, it becomes visible, 14 for anything that becomes visible is light. Therefore it says, “Awake, O sleeper, and arise from the dead, and Christ will shine on you.”15 Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, 16 making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.17 Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.18 And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit,19 addressing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody to the Lord with your heart,20 giving thanks always and for everything to God the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ, 21 submitting to one another out of reverence for Christ.

Really looks like Lori doesn’t spend all that much time reading the rest of Ephesians Chapter 5  

[Koala]

Lori's (disgusting) soup got me wondering- what are you guys having for dinner tonight?

My husband took the day off to help with some things around the house (bless him).  We are exhausted.  I am making oven baked chimichangas (one of my favorite Pinterest finds) with all of the fixings.  Tomorrow morning I am going to put salisbury steak in the crock pot and serve it with rice and veggies tomorrow night.  Super easy.

1 hour ago, fluffy said:

she is in there ALL DAY. It's nuts to me. 

That doesn't surprise me at all.  She admitted in one of her videos that spending a "majority of her day monitoring the chat room" was how she spends her days as a "godly, older woman". 

It's really pathetic, because she LOVES to tell people to work hard in their homes, but she has a come apart over making a pot of soup.

Quote

 It’s a LOT of work 

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 Lots of work

Seriously woman, chill.  You made a pot of soup, you didn't discover the cure for the common cold.
 

 

[Maggie Mae]

I should make something for the food blog. Anyone have any suggestions? It's summer here, so I should make something light and airy, and possibly French. Or I could make Pasta e Fagioli, which is a delicious and EASY soup (99% of soups are easy), made with panchetta & pepperoni, beans, herbs and spices and ditalini. (cook the pasta separate and store it separate.)  

[Koala]

A reader responded to Lori's post on wife discipline.  It's a rather long exchange, so I'm putting it under spoilers.   It shows you what a shrew Lori really is.  The way this reader was ganged up on, is disgusting.  

Reader:

Spoiler

You'll notice that KAK went as far as to agree with Lori on many points.  But that's not enough.  Lori expects complete, blind acceptance of anything she says (and sometimes she'll even find a way to argue with people who are agreeing with her.  In any case, she writes out a pretty snotty reply- typical Lori:

Spoiler

Seriously?  Lori spends her LIFE fretting over how other people run their families.  She asked a stranger in the park if he spanked his child.  She argues (endlessly) with women over whether they should work or stay home / how they should parent/ how much they should eat.  

How can she even ask such a stupid question.  Does she think everyone is just going to nod their heads to every word she says??

***But this is where it really gets crazy...becaues Trey chimes in...and OMG...***

Part 1 (seriously, it's long)

Spoiler

Funny, Lori uses "shaming" language about women on a daily basis, and I haven't heard a sound out of Trey about it.  But, I understand...he's delicate, and this has offended him greatly.  Bless his heart...

Part 2 (otherwise known as: when shit got real)

Spoiler

And finally, KAK's  response (which I am shocked that Lori hasn't deleted yet):

Spoiler

Part 2:

Quote

Conclusion: 
Trey is nuts / Lori is nuts.

[Briefly]

10 hours ago, Lgirlrocks said:

I would have told him my body my choice. Why would he marry someone who wore too much make up for his taste anyways? 

Because he wanted to marry someone he could dominate and beat down, emotionally at least.  Because he is a bully and possibly physically abusive as well.  I wish she'd had the life experience or even just the guts to run, run, run and never look back.  His first acts included things to make her feel bad about her self and destroy her self-worth or self-esteem.  So many fundie women don't seem to realize that they are in that type of relationship or that there is anything wrong with it.

[Briefly]

6 hours ago, feministxtian said:

Reading all this made me almost throw up in my mouth a little. 

Now, I'm all for a playful swat on the behind between consenting adults...but "disciplining me"...I don't fucking think so...HOWEVER...me and the hub lived together for almost a year before getting married...he knew damn well what he was getting into (just proves he's crazier than I am). 

Submission? Hell no, we're grown and if we can't reach a consensus, we both have problems resolving conflict. Now, we'll talk something to DEATH...I foresee this happening about choosing where we're going to move to later this summer...but we'll reach a consensus and it won't be one or the other "getting their way". 

Husband as king? Nope...as a Christian, I have one king...and that makes me a princess which is pretty cool

We joke about spankings (Mr. Briefly and myself) but the idea of a real spanking like Lori talks?  That makes my blood boil.  Actually, hubs joke is to say "spank you very much" when he thanks me for something - if it's just us and we are joking around.

[feministxtian]

19 minutes ago, Briefly said:

Actually, hubs joke is to say "spank you very much" when he thanks me for something

My daughter says this. She's adorable. 

My kids...after a certain age...would get the dreaded count to three. They never made it to three and as I've found out now, years later, they were all terrified of what would happen when I got there. I have no idea what I would have done if I had counted to three. They also learned that if they could make me laugh they wouldn't get in trouble...they're experts at cracking me up. 

My husband and I are a couple of sickos...We talk about me "stabbing" him. I regularly stab him 4 times a week. 3 of those are to change out his insulin pump tubing and one is to change out his CGM sensor. Honestly I hate doing it because I know I'm hurting him. Those insertion needles are no joke. BUT...it's one of those things. The choice is to either inflict pain with insertion needles or out of control diabetes. With the pump, his A1c values are damn near perfect. Without it, forget about it. 

#1 son "left me a surprise" in my bank account this morning. (we all bank at the same credit union and can easily transfer money around)...got a text saying "here mom, go get done for your new job"....yeah, I cried. 

[Sarah92]

Trey is a condescending asshole who thinks he can bully any woman because he is the alpha male. And I might not agree with everything KAK said but she handed his ass to him. I'd like to see her become egalitarian because she seems like she'd be a good addition. Seriously Trey is vile. 

He talked about winning the world over with submission. I'm sorry that's not going to win people over. 99.99 percent of NORMAL are going to look at the submission he describes as creepy and abusive. And then high tail it out of the church like people have already been doing. Heck it's what I've been tempted to do.

It also doesn't accurately showcase who Jesus was because as much as he served others he is not permanently submissive. 

My dinner: baked chicken, green beans, and red potatoes with that Campbell's garlic butter sauce that comes in a bag. I think it's delicious 

[AlwaysDiscerning]

OmG is Trey saying that cabinetman is ssm's husband? I have never heard that before. Thoughts??

[feministxtian]

12 minutes ago, Sarah92 said:

Trey is a condescending asshole who thinks he can bully any woman because he is the alpha male.

Gimme 10 minutes with him. Please? I promise I'll video it and post it on Youtube. 

Let's see what happens when the "alpha male" runs into THE BITCH from hell. 

[AlwaysDiscerning]

Ken now responds with a bunch of rambling...

Quote

 

I doubt that you two (KAK and Trey) are that far off in how you see submission, but the difference is that you, KAK, have as you say, “My own experiences, whenever I see something like the dishwasher situation above, alarm bells start ringing in my ears.”

That sense is a general sense that many Christian women have and it is probably half true that indeed some husbands can be petty and controlling with their wives. So you begin with deciding that “knives in the dishwasher is petty,” and end with “this husband must be petty.”

The reality of things is that neither you nor Sunshine Mary gets to decide what is petty and is not petty IF your desire is to please your husband and submit to him. If a wife is regularly deciding what is “right and wrong” and worse yet, deciding what is right and wrong in another marriage, she is not understanding what the heart of submission is all about. Hence Treys point.

Think about it with me, if it is petty to insist that knives be washed by hand, is it also not petty not to wash them by hand? Yes, if this is a common pattern it may show pettiness, but if this is a “one-off” preference by a husband and the wife refuses to do it because she deems it petty, she is simply being unsubmissive. Because to choose what to submit to and what not to submit to with a godly, regularly good leader of husband goes to the heart of the issue of submission. Is a wife to pick and choose what she is to submit to, by simply seeing it as petty? Or does her submission bloom into something far more loving when she submits to the petty, in part because it is petty? If she is not to submit would it not be far better to do so over something that is of far more important than washing knives?

Just a thought…

 

 

Jeff:

Quote

What about riding the clutch on a standard. Is that ok make? Because that can run $1500 to fix. It’s a bad habit that people do. If the wife does it, should he buy her a new car or tell her to stop riding the clutch? Could run higher if the transmission blows!

Tell me Jeff, if a wife puts hot pots on her counters to intentionally ruin them and get new ones, is that OK? Ask Lori about that. 

[feministxtian]

Well, my hubs does the dishes...its part of the deal...I cook, he cleans up. I don't like the way he loads the dishwasher but it's not my problem! In reality, he does most of the housework because of my back/neck problems. AND...when I go back to working full time, he'll have more time to do that shit b/c he works part time. So, he does the housework so we have more time for US. He can get shit done while I'm at work (he leaves for work at 2pm). 

Regarding riding the clutch...I would say something about it...mostly because replacing a clutch is a bitch if you do it yourself and it's right pricey to pay someone to do it. My last clutch ran about 500 bucks and that was with a friend doing it. But...that's why hubs doesn't drive my car. He never learned to drive a stick and clutches are too damn expensive...and he'd be seriously dangerous in my car...he has too much road rage and it's best he drives his tank (99 Expedition 4WD). 

[EowynW]

uhhhhhh we will prolly have frozen pizza for dinner. Because we've had a blah day and went out and spent two hours in the garden and I forgot to cook. 

[ladyicantxplain]

45 minutes ago, AlwaysDiscerning said:

OmG is Trey saying that cabinetman is ssm's husband? I have never heard that before. Thoughts??

Wait...Cabinetman has always been Phil the Nurse, aka Mr. Sunshine Mary?  Well, then...who is Trey...betcha' he was very active on SSM's defunct blog.

[Escadora]

You know, I'm not one for confrontation in real life (only because I cry when I get angry and people don't take a crier seriously) but if I had a husband like Trey I might just have to forget all my anger management techniques and just go off on the twat. 

Everyone has their ways they like things to be done, but unless the other person's method's going to ruin or break something (Lori with the countertops, for example... hypocrite) should we not just let people go about their tasks and work in the ways that work best for them? The same job gets done either way, for heaven's sake. 

These pedantic, whiney men clearly don't have enough to do with their time if they're nitpicking their wives' housework. If you've got time to complain, you've got time to lend a hand.

Also, I like to think and hope that if a SO of mine ever raised a hand to me in anything other than a consensual jokey/whatever way, then I'd be strong enough to be able to walk away. I got enough in the way of physical punishment when I was a child, and I'm more than capable of (figuratively) beating my own damn self up if I fuck up. Ugh.

[Carol]

Ken says,

"That sense is a general sense that many Christian women have and it is probably half true that indeed some husbands can be petty and controlling with their wives. So you begin with deciding that “knives in the dishwasher is petty,” and end with “this husband must be petty.”

 

Ken, you cocksuckingmotherfuckingmisogynistbawbaglyingpieceofuneducatedignorant shit...it's not half true.  It's completely true.  

 

[Hane]

3 minutes ago, Escadora said:

These pedantic, whiney men clearly don't have enough to do with their time if they're nitpicking their wives' housework. If you've got time to complain, you've got time to lend a hand.

My favorite anecdote on this topic:

My aunt was a public school teacher and the mother of four kids—five, including a nephew who lived with her family as a teenager. Her job was essential to the running of the household because it provided medical benefits to the family.

One day my uncle started whinging about the house starting to look kind of ratty. She sighed and said, “Yes, it does. Guess it’s time to quit my job.” And guess who shut up.

Not long after, she hired a high school girl to do a little mother’s helper work.

RIP, Aunt Joann.

[Frog99]

35 minutes ago, EowynW said:

uhhhhhh we will prolly have frozen pizza for dinner. Because we've had a blah day and went out and spent two hours in the garden and I forgot to cook. 

I don’t see a thing wrong with frozen pizza- there are some I think are really good! 

We had baked cod with roasted Parmesan broccoli. I had a protein shake before bed. 

[Hane]

I went out to dinner with my local Charity Club, a veritable coven of evil career women who squander their money on people who are destitute or otherwise going through hard times. I had pistachio-crusted pork tenderloin, smashed potatoes, and asparagus.

[Escadora]

For dinner earlier on I had pasta with a homemade mushroom, garlic, and mozzarella sauce and those Quorn fake chicken pieces. It was really good, but I do wish I'd used real chicken instead, because the texture was a bit off. I also made garlic bread but my stupid butthead brothers ate it all before I got to the table. Wankers. 

Tomorrow I'm making a roasted vegetable soup, a beef and root vegetable stew (WITH DUMPLINGS!), and far too many croutons. I'll probably snack on the croutons throughout the day and have to make a new batch for dinner. 

ETA: Does anyone have any recommendations on what to do with a butternut squash? I picked one up yesterday and I've never cooked with one or tried it before. I've been looking up recipes but I've no idea what's what when it comes to it.

[Alisamer]

4 minutes ago, Escadora said:

 

ETA: Does anyone have any recommendations on what to do with a butternut squash? I picked one up yesterday and I've never cooked with one or tried it before. I've been looking up recipes but I've no idea what's what when it comes to it.

I'm no cook, but I like to cube up a butternut squash, drizzle it with olive oil and salt and pepper, and roast it in the oven, usually with some carrots. 

My dinner was pathetic, a McDonalds burger in the car waiting for a Pokémon raid. I wasn't really super hungry and that's all that sounded good, and I knew I needed to eat or I'd be too hungry to sleep.