Josie and Kelton 1: Here We Go Again

[ColeJo]

I don't know how the relationship developed, but sometimes there is pressure to move on and find another girl. It happened with my dad. He met my mom in eighth grade and that was it for him. Family members and his peers were encouraging him to "shop around." I'm not saying that was the case with Kelton. Let's be real though. It only matters how Gil and Kelly want to be portrayed. The in-laws are just cameos, aside from Chad, he might be more of a recurring character. 

[TeaELSee]

2 hours ago, ColeJo said:

I don't know how the relationship developed, but sometimes there is pressure to move on and find another girl. It happened with my dad. He met my mom in eighth grade and that was it for him. Family members and his peers were encouraging him to "shop around." I'm not saying that was the case with Kelton. Let's be real though. It only matters how Gil and Kelly want to be portrayed. The in-laws are just cameos, aside from Chad, he might be more of a recurring character. 

According to the Bates, Josie was only 15 when they met and Kelton was 19 and in college.  That is a solid reason to wait. 

[candygirl200413]

Also wouldn't he need permission to get a girlfriend a la PCC crazy rules?

[Lurky]

5 hours ago, TeaELSee said:

According to the Bates, Josie was only 15 when they met and Kelton was 19 and in college.  That is a solid reason to wait. 

Yeah, I'm confused why it's not a positive for the Bateses, because if they were pushing a 15 year old daughter to date-with-a-purpose/court a 19 year old, we'd all lose our collective shit, rightly.

[llucie]

1 hour ago, Lurky said:

Yeah, I'm confused why it's not a positive for the Bateses, because if they were pushing a 15 year old daughter to date-with-a-purpose/court a 19 year old, we'd all lose our collective shit, rightly.

Thats positive. The negative is the lie they are saying: that he is so mature he was so commited to Josie he waited for her for years, in the moment she is 18 they starting to court because he was just waiting for her all this time.

But he was not waiting was he? maybe not so mature after all. Are they rushing the wedding just because he is unable to keep it in his pants and wait for Josie?

[BeccaGrim]

Josie said something during the courtship episode that leads me to think it wouldn't be at all odd that he had another girlfriend for a bit. She thanked him for jumping through the hoops to date a Bates girl.  As though she herself knows it is really hard and odd.

He wanted to date her. Gil put them off. He tried to date someone else. Seems he wasn't 100% on board with the courtship model.  He may have tried someone else, decided it was worth it to go through the Josie hoops. 

[VelociRapture]

4 hours ago, llucie said:

Thats positive. The negative is the lie they are saying: that he is so mature he was so commited to Josie he waited for her for years, in the moment she is 18 they starting to court because he was just waiting for her all this time.

But he was not waiting was he? maybe not so mature after all. Are they rushing the wedding just because he is unable to keep it in his pants and wait for Josie?

I’m going to defend Kelton a bit. As far as I know Kelton hasn’t made any claims about waiting for Josie. The only one I remember saying something like that is Kelly:

https://www.google.com/amp/s/amp.knoxnews.com/amp/498668002

Kelly said in a TH during the Thanksgiving episode that they asked them to wait a bit until Josie was older since she was only 15 when they first started to feel attracted to each other. She then makes the claim that “they waited for each other.” So if anyone should be called immature it’s Kelly, not Kelton (who may not have even known what was being said in the TH and likely has no control over the narrative presented.) That’s assuming there even was a relationship between Monika and Kelton and this hasn’t all been overblown a bit. 

Also, Josie and Kelton didn’t start courting the second she turned 18. They started courting this past January, about five months after her 18th birthday. Evan and Carlin are the ones who started courting right around the time Josie turned 18 on August 4th. Kelton specifically apologized to Gil and Kelly for asking about a courtship at Thanksgiving because Tori was getting married soon and he didn’t want to unintentionally take attention away from them. I’m guessing he purposely waited until after the wedding was over to actually ask Josie to court for that reason, which doesn’t strike me as immature at all. It actually seems very thoughtful and considerate.

I honestly doubt Kelton not being able to keep it in his pants is the sole reason they’re getting married (and also - why not mention Josie being able to keep it in her pants too? Women get urges too. Maybe he isn’t struggling much with urges and she is.) They had a longer “getting to know you period”, are both done with school, and they both have jobs. They were courting for about five months prior to the engagement, which is longer than Zach and Whitney or John and Alyssa courted - Whitney was likely only 18 (or had just turned 19) when she and Zach started getting to know each other. Alyssa and John courted for just over 2 months prior to getting engaged. She turned 19 right before John asked her to court. Short courtships aren’t exactly an anomaly in the Bates family. The biggest predictor for courtship length is likely whether the man involved is gainfully employed - the longer courtships have all involved men who were either still in school (Bobby, Brandon, and Evan) or who were relocating to Tennessee and were looking get settled first (Chad and Bobby.) John, Zach, and Kelton didn’t have those road blocks, so a quicker courtship period could have made a lot of sense for those couples.

Finally, we have no clue whether Kelton’s family subscribed to courtships or not. Maybe he comes from a family that takes a more relaxed view about dating and he saw no issues pursuing another relationship with someone he also had feelings for.  Perhaps that experience made him realize how much he cared for Josie and he decided he wanted to be with her despite her parents being stupid. 

(And that was so much longer than I anticipated. I didn’t mean to write so much, so I’m sorry for that.)

[singsingsing]

It's funny that people are shocked that Kelton was dating someone else and that it almost feels like him cheating on Josie, because that is exactly the talking point I've seen pushed by fundies/courtship proponents in the past! "Don't date, don't kiss your boyfriend/girlfriend, don't touch, don't say 'I love you', don't get too emotionally involved, because - " - get this - " - YOU'RE CHEATING ON YOUR FUTURE SPOUSE!"

[Oh_Dear!]

I applaud Kelton for dating around (if that’s what he was doing) during his and Josie’s break. He, at least, has had some experience to prove to him that Josie truly is the person he wants to be with. 

 

[llucie]

I dont see nothing wrong with Kelton dating, you are geting it wrong. I like they guy, maybe its a bit weird that he became infatuated with a 15 year old girl when he was in his 20s, but apart from that he seems like a normal guy, and he and Josie seem well matched.

The only thing i dont like is the fact that they are hypocritical and lying to the audience in the show, and to his credit i think its probably the Bates family that is pushing for this image that he is so mature and waited so much for her to justify the fact that they are allowing her to marry so young, and dont appear like completely irresponsible parents on tv.

[Seculardaisy]

Didn’t Kelton insinuate in the courtship episode, when he was on the ladder hanging lights that he spent his time at college buckling down basically for Josie?

For the record I don’t look down on him for dating another girl I’m just surprised because the Bates family definitely painted a different image.

[miss_batson]

Its Kelton's birthday

 

[ihaveanexamintwodays]

i actually think that's a really sweet photo! i like that it seems Josie and Kelton appreciate each other as people, and they seem very comfortable with each other. definitely more so than the early Bates couples.

[PurpleCats]

I know with every courtship, we say this is the one to escape fundiedom.... but I see this couple going to Zach & Whitney path pretty quickly. Couple of kids, secular jobs, working mom... pretty average small town conservative Christians. 

[TeaELSee]

I don’t recall the Bates or Duggars using the term fiancé before, then again I don’t pay close attention to any of their accounts. It just stood out to me.

[ophelia]

12 hours ago, PurpleCats said:

I know with every courtship, we say this is the one to escape fundiedom.... but I see this couple going to Zach & Whitney path pretty quickly. Couple of kids, secular jobs, working mom... pretty average small town conservative Christians. 

I hope you are right. Birth control would be a huge step. Although they'll probably have 2-3 kids in quick succession and then there will be a gap.

[Nikedagain?]

On 6/22/2018 at 8:29 AM, llucie said:

Also, Trump supporter.

Well this is 100% of the people we talk about..

[VelociRapture]

22 minutes ago, Nikedagain? said:

Well this is 100% of the people we talk about..

Nope. Ben Seewald publicly stated he didn’t vote for Clinton or Trump in the general election. I don’t know about any of the many other people we discuss here*, but I don’t doubt some of them didn’t support Trump as well. 

*Not just the IBLP crowd, but any Fundie we discuss here. 

[llucie]

On 7/6/2018 at 11:19 PM, VelociRapture said:

Nope. Ben Seewald publicly stated he didn’t vote for Clinton or Trump in the general election. I don’t know about any of the many other people we discuss here*, but I don’t doubt some of them didn’t support Trump as well. 

*Not just the IBLP crowd, but any Fundie we discuss here. 

I think Ben is the exception to the rule sadly, even the fact that he wanted to clarify it, he has a diferent view that most of his peers.

But even if all the Bateses support Trump they have not been very obvious about it, have keep it to themselves, but not Kelton. He posted a photo the day of the election saying he had voted Trump, i found it very unnecesary.

[VineHeart137]

21 minutes ago, llucie said:

I think Ben is the exception to the rule sadly, even the fact that he wanted to clarify it, he has a diferent view that most of his peers.

But even if all the Bateses support Trump they have not been very obvious about it, have keep it to themselves, but not Kelton. He posted a photo the day of the election saying he had voted Trump, i found it very unnecesary.

Whitney also posted a lovely photo of herself the day of the election, and stated in the caption that she and Zach had voted for Trump. In spite of her cute clothes, she's kind of been my fundie BEC ever since, although like you said, most if not all of the Bateses (and Duggars) probably voted the same way, and Ben is an exception to the rule.

[VelociRapture]

2 hours ago, llucie said:

I think Ben is the exception to the rule sadly, even the fact that he wanted to clarify it, he has a diferent view that most of his peers.

But even if all the Bateses support Trump they have not been very obvious about it, have keep it to themselves, but not Kelton. He posted a photo the day of the election saying he had voted Trump, i found it very unnecesary.

The poster literally wrote that “100% of the people” we talk about here voted for Trump. Ben proves that isn’t a factual statement. Additionally, we don’t only talk about people from just these families or who are only involved with IBLP on this website. I wouldn’t be surprised if more of the people discussed here didn’t vote for or support Trump either. 

And, here is the post @VineHeart137mentioned from Whitney:

 Compared to Kelton’s:

Spoiler

 

I personally find Whitney’s post far preachier and more obnoxious than Kelton’s.  

I got curious and looked at the other Bates accounts. We have a far more subtle post from Gil and Kelly: 

Spoiler

 

Given the emphasis she placed on fetuses, I’d say it’s a pretty safe bet they voted for Trump and this was their diplomatic way of stating their support without actually stating it.  

Evan posted this:

Spoiler

 

He was asked who he voted for and his answer was, “The President!” That could either be a  diplomatic way of dodging a question he doesn’t need to answer or it could be his way of diplomatically confirming he voted for Trump.

From Lawson:

Spoiler

 

Some comments on Lawson’s post indicate he had, at one point, tagged Mike Pence in the photo. That’s no longer the case, but that’s a pretty clear indication he voted for Trump.

Carlin:

Spoiler

 

Carlin’s tells us nothing other than she voted.

The rest of the Bateses stayed quiet about it as far as I recall. 

[mydoggoskeeper]

I feel like a traitor to my ideas for even writing this, but I am very curious to see  Josie's wedding dress. She is stylish and seems to gently push the boundaries of modern modest (lower necklines, shorter hems, sheer panels, etc). 

[Kelsey]

Have they announced a wedding date yet?

[llucie]

6 hours ago, VineHeart137 said:

Whitney also posted a lovely photo of herself the day of the election, and stated in the caption that she and Zach had voted for Trump. In spite of her cute clothes, she's kind of been my fundie BEC ever since, although like you said, most if not all of the Bateses (and Duggars) probably voted the same way, and Ben is an exception to the rule.

I had no idea about Whitney, a shame since i was starting to like her. And yes the rest of the Bates hinted at it or you can guess based on his friends or something (Michaella had some friends posting photos with her at trump tower), but didnt clearly state it, they just said they voted, not to who. I guess the in laws didnt get the be subtle memo.

[PurpleCats]

While I am no fan of 45 or his policies, I’m trying really hard to not judge their decision to vote for him. They voted for the candidate that gave them the best chance at another ‘conservative’ Supreme Court Justice.  I can’t expect people that so passionately dislike legal abortion to vote any other way. 

Now, if they had passionately lobbied for his policies after the election and after he continues to (from my perspective) create chaos, I could dislike them more for their political choices.  Also, no matter how many of them voted or did not vote in Tennessee, it was still going to go red.