Lori Alexander 34: The Woo Is Strong with this One

[usmcmom]

I can understand why Lori has not mentioned Ken's trip. My husband travels a lot for work and I never post about it until he is home from each trip. I am uncomfortable making it widely known that I am alone in the house for a few days. When our kids were still home, their closest friends always knew when their dad was traveling because these friends spent so much time in our home. Still, we encouraged them not to talk about it too much at school. Maybe I'm a little paranoid, but why advertise that the man of the house is gone and that our normal routine might be off a bit? 

About Ken's trip with Alyssa. I think it is very VERY odd and so many scenarios are going through my head. I don't think Lori is real close, emotionally speaking, to Alyssa; so maybe she didn't want to make the effort to travel with her to a beach location. After all, why spend several days watching your husband get all pervy about all the bikinis and "thong bathing suits"? 

I also think Lori's modesty posts are aimed at Alyssa. I have to wonder why she has such contempt for her own daughter. She seems to carry a truly hateful jealousy about her. I wonder if Ken really bonded with Alyssa when she was a child and Lori has seethed with jealousy ever since. Plus, Alyssa seems to be in a sincere and loving marriage and Lori could not manage that either. 

Also, Lori just needs to shut her mouth about modesty when her daughters and daughters-in-law clearly don't meet her standards. We cannot control what our adult children do, but Lori does expect that of others. If her teachings could not even be fully followed by her own children, she, by her own expectations of others, has clearly failed and needs to leave that topic alone. I have no problem with how these grown women dress, but Lori needs to accept the fact that this is just one more area in which her parenting style was a complete failure. 

[AlwaysDiscerning]

Lori says 

Quote

It’s interesting to note that God doesn’t tell us that men can build up or tear down their homes. No, it’s women who have this type of power 

It hit me!! This is why she thinks men with drug, alcohol, gambling addictions or anger management problems can't destroy their home. BECAUSE the bible says only women can tear down their homes. So, it doesn't matter how bad a man is behaving the home will remain intact simply because he is a man and doesn't have that sort of magical power.  And a woman divorcing a horrible man is the one who is tearing her home down. 

[TeddyBonkers]

I have an actual "funny story" (not Lori-style "funny story") about taking personal messages at work. There was a married non-com whose side chick would call the dining facility to talk to this guy. Maybe the wife was monitoring the cell phone, I do not know. All I know is that as the admin non-com, I got tasked to answer the damn phone all the time. It took precisely two phone calls before I ripped this guy a new asshole. I blamed it on my pregnancy hormones.

And I would like to second what @Koalasaid about Ken being gone. When Mr. Bonkers is gone, I don't tell anyone on social media. I'd tell my mom on the phone probably. He used to have to travel for work a lot- I was super jealous when he went to South Korea for a week.

[Carol]

It's Contest Time!!  YES, it's time for SLUT-O-RAMA!!!  (A Transient Wife Production)

 

1.  Have you ever made eye contact with a man who isn't your   husband? - 1

2.  Have you ever left your house without your husband? - 1

3.  Have you ever spoken to your husband in an angry tone of voice? - 1

4.   Have you ever kissed a man other than your husband? - 2

5.   Have you ever tried to teach a man anything? - 2

6.   Have you ever acted as though you were the headship of your home? - 2

7.   Have you ever turned your husband down for marital relations? - 3

8.   Have you ever considered divorcing your husband? - 3

9.   Has your husband ever gone on a vacation without you? - 3

10.  Have you ever fucked a guy other than your husband? - 4

11.  Have you ever had a threesome? - 4

12.  Have you ever thought Lori Alexander is a really, nasty woman? - 4

 

Count your score.

1-3 = slatternly woman

4-6 = you're pre-approved for membership in FreeJinger

7-9 = you're dangerously close to a whore

10-12 = Shit, you don't stand a chance

 

HIGHEST SCORE WINS!!!

 

 

 

[TeddyBonkers]

I have never kissed or fucked another man AFTER I married my husband...I think that counts for something! But even without those points, I'm clearly bound for Hell.

[Petronella]

3 hours ago, Frog99 said:

@Petronella it was from her blog post about not encouraging women to divorce. It’s her comment in response to the lady whose comment she used for one if her doodles (the one about the in laws and now he’s a great grandfather). I think the fake site has been shut down. Interestingly enough, there was a fake Jason Cooley but that one is gone as well.

Wow. I guess she really did react to that description of "smile treatment" positively. Wow. That's a new low in my eyes.

[older than allosaurs]

35 minutes ago, Carol said:

It's Contest Time!!  YES, it's time for SLUT-O-RAMA!!!  (A Transient Wife Production)

etc....

 

Do I subtract points for each husband and then combine the totals? That would be a championship score.

[Chocolatedefrauded]

How about if you had sex with or kissed more than 1 man besides your husband- do you get points for each? Or is kissing one guy as bad as kissing 15 over a lifetime? 

Asking for a friend, of course. A sex-positive friend who married late & really enjoyed being single. Wink, wink. Cause if each person counts, there's gonna be some large negative numbers in my neighborhood!

[Koala]

I don't believe for a second that Lori stayed to care for her ailing mother.  Or her, "old, sick mother" as she so fondly calls her.  

Caring for a terminally ill person is exhausting and draining in every way, and to be honest, I don't think there's any way on earth that Lori (the taker, who likes to be served) would give anyone that kind of care.   Hell, she wouldn't even properly care for her own infants, leaving them to go all night without being fed or changed, and letting them cry "all day" until the nanny finally intervened.   

For that matter, if she was caring for her mom, she wouldn't have time to fool around on the internet all day, taking pictures of her kitchen, and quizzing the chat room ladies on various topics.  Nope.  I think if there was any danger of Lori ending up helping anyone, she'd have been on that plane faster than you can say "Godly Mentor".

I fully expect that when the time (sadly) comes for her to be there for her mom, she will play the "...but I am so, so sick" card, and leave all of the work to her sisters and father.  Meanwhile, she'll be blogging up a storm, trying desperately to go viral.  She went viral, you know.

[quiversR4hunting]

Who wanted the blue shirt picture? 

[Hane]

31 minutes ago, Koala said:

I don't believe for a second that Lori stayed to care for her ailing mother.  Or her, "old, sick mother" as she so fondly calls her.  

Yeah. If she were so devoted to the care of her Old Sick Mother, Lori wouldn’t have spent ten freaking uninterrupted weeks in Door County this past summer.

[Koala]

18 minutes ago, quiversR4hunting said:

Who wanted the blue shirt picture? 

 

 

I wonder what the women who lap up all of her ideas on modesty would think of this picture.

 

[Frog99]

1 hour ago, Petronella said:

Wow. I guess she really did react to that description of "smile treatment" positively. Wow. That's a new low in my eyes.

Sorry- I misunderstood! The comment was on Lori’s blog post. The smiling picture is from a FB page called  pictures in history. I saw it and it made me think it would be something Lori would support. And I found it interesting in light of how she romanticizes history. 

@usmcmom point taken on the not sharing he’s away- Perhaps she’s smarter than I give her credit for. The last I checked, what I assume is their home address is listed right on the website for Ken’s business. And she didn’t have any issues posting they were in Wisconsin all summer. 

I think it would be amazing to be in the caymans with my hubs. But I also don’t have a need to police what he or others are doing. And if a pretty, athletic female walks by, I won’t be threatened if he looks. Honestly, I would probably look because I get how much time and discipline it takes. 

[EmiGirl]

19 minutes ago, Frog99 said:

Honestly, I would probably look because I get how much time and discipline it takes. 

My husband wouldn'teven notice, but I would probably look and shame myself for being a fat pig and hating myself for the rest of the day 

[Hisey]

1 hour ago, Koala said:

I don't believe for a second that Lori stayed to care for her ailing mother.  Or her, "old, sick mother" as she so fondly calls her.  

Caring for a terminally ill person is exhausting and draining in every way, and to be honest, I don't think there's any way on earth that Lori (the taker, who likes to be served) would give anyone that kind of care.   Hell, she wouldn't even properly care for her own infants, leaving them to go all night without being fed or changed, and letting them cry "all day" until the nanny finally intervened.   

For that matter, if she was caring for her mom, she wouldn't have time to fool around on the internet all day, taking pictures of her kitchen, and quizzing the chat room ladies on various topics.  Nope.  I think if there was any danger of Lori ending up helping anyone, she'd have been on that plane faster than you can say "Godly Mentor".

I fully expect that when the time (sadly) comes for her to be there for her mom, she will play the "...but I am so, so sick" card, and leave all of the work to her sisters and father.  Meanwhile, she'll be blogging up a storm, trying desperately to go viral.  She went viral, you know.

I didn't mean she stayed to care for her mother (that might be "too exhausting"). I meant (I hope this is not true) that perhaps her mother is nearing the end and Lori felt she should stay.

[TeddyBonkers]

20 minutes ago, EmiGirl said:

My husband wouldn'teven notice, but I would probably look and shame myself for being a fat pig and hating myself for the rest of the day 

Right there with you, sister.

[quiversR4hunting]

3 hours ago, Carol said:

1.  Have you ever made eye contact with a man who isn't your   husband? - 1

2.  Have you ever left your house without your husband? - 1

3.  Have you ever spoken to your husband in an angry tone of voice? - 1

4.   Have you ever kissed a man other than your husband? - 2

5.   Have you ever tried to teach a man anything? - 2

6.   Have you ever acted as though you were the headship of your home? - 2

7.   Have you ever turned your husband down for marital relations? - 3

8.   Have you ever considered divorcing your husband? - 3

9.   Has your husband ever gone on a vacation without you? - 3

10.  Have you ever fucked a guy other than your husband? - 4

11.  Have you ever had a threesome? - 4

12.  Have you ever thought Lori Alexander is a really, nasty woman? - 4

#1 &2 I have made eye contact with a man (not husband) then got in his Jeep and went to hot yoga with him. All with my husband's ok.

#3 - today or in general? Today no. I'll leave it at that  

#4 - romantically/mouth kiss since being married? No. I have, however, kissed my friend's head at the funeral of his son where he too almost lost his life (he was still recovering from his physical injuries - couldn't even hug him at the funeral, could only kiss his balding head), and I have kissed cheeks of very close friends and my dad

skipping to #8 my grandmother, at our wedding, was asked what advice she has for marriage (my grandparents had been married 50 or 60+ years at that point) - she said "People have asked me have I ever considered divorce, she tells them 'divorce no, kill him yes!'" Her moral of the story was sometimes it's hard to live with another human.

How much do you want to bet that Lori has thought about divorcing Ken? But then $$ come to her eyes and she "submits"...

This quiz will totally "prove" to Lori that we all are a bunch of harlots.

I forgot to add #1 & 2, every.single.day.

[Chocolatedefrauded]

Ok, I totally misread those questions so my number, sorry, my friend's number is not that low. I thought it was over our whole lives, not since getting married. Totally changes things. Although I once missed and kissed my father-in-law on the mouth by mistake. Very awkward.

Now if we count the number of times we've thought Lori is a nasty, ungodly snot, my number changes drastically. Once per day, at least!

[smittykins]

Does the time I've been widowed count, or just the time I was married?

In either case, I call shotgun in the handbasket!

[mango_fandango]

As an unmarried young woman who still hasn’t lost her V-card, I only score 4... yeah, the last one in case it wasn’t obvious  

[Frog99]

1 hour ago, TeddyBonkers said:

Right there with you, sister.

Truth be told, same here...

[Petronella]

5 hours ago, AuntKrazy said:

I just wanted to say that my husband travels for work without me.  He will be going to a math conference in January.  He also takes the occasional "fun" short trip - "fun" being in quotes because those short trips are usually sporting event related to events that I have no interest, and he goes with one of his good male friends.  But anything non-work related for more than a couple of days, I would be along.

And if he were going to Grand Cayman, (or somewhere similar) he would definitely take me!  We had the best day of our honeymoon in the Cayman islands, and I don't think he would ever go there without me.  

I definitely think it's odd that Lori hasn't joined Ken on this trip, but I don't think anyone needs to defend the very concept travel apart from one's spouse. There are plenty of happy relationships in which people will sometimes travel separately for various reasons, not just business.

[kpmom]

33 minutes ago, smittykins said:

Does the time I've been widowed count, or just the time I was married?

In either case, I call shotgun in the handbasket!

O.k., but I get to choose the radio station!

[Petronella]

2 hours ago, Frog99 said:

Sorry- I misunderstood! The comment was on Lori’s blog post. The smiling picture is from a FB page called  pictures in history. I saw it and it made me think it would be something Lori would support. And I found it interesting in light of how she romanticizes history. 

Wait, did *I* misunderstand? It looked to me like someone posted a link to the smile thing in the comments, and Lori responded to that link by saying it was a good thing. Did that happen? Or had you (or someone else?) written her response as something you think Lori would say?

[usmcmom]

2 hours ago, Frog99 said:

 

@usmcmom point taken on the not sharing he’s away- Perhaps she’s smarter than I give her credit for. The last I checked, what I assume is their home address is listed right on the website for Ken’s business. And she didn’t have any issues posting they were in Wisconsin all summer. 

 

You know; you are right. She DID broadcast  her eleventy week vacation while she was away.  Who knows what goes through her mind?  I will suggest, though, that the Door County trip was one she felt she could brag about and use to flaunt her lifestyle. How, exactly, is she going to explain that her husband is on vacation without her? On a beach? With half naked women?  There really is no way to make this look proper at all to Lori's followers.  If Lori read about her rival bloggers' husbands doing this, she's write up a nice nasty post about it.  

Also, Ken drinking alcohol and we all know Lori wishes God would not allow any alcohol AT ALL!!