Lori Alexander 34: The Woo Is Strong with this One

[EowynW]

38 minutes ago, Leftitinmysnood said:

Super late to the knitting party with @EowynW, @KatBonD, @KnittingOwl, and @PennySycamore. Why don't we all chat in Quiver full of Hobbies? Knitters are my people, too. We have a really active guild here; weekly meet-ups, retreats, classes from designers. I'm furiously knitting a sweater for my baby niece and a shawl for my mom before Christmas. I have a current obsession with double knitting, and recently took a class that transformed my colorwork tension.

My club is starting a colorwork knit along in January. Because none of us know how to do it! I am scared, lol! We are just doing an easy fingerless glove pattern in worsted. I saw my first double knit piece at our local fiber fest and it was amazing. 

[dairyfreelife]

Because the car or house analogy is used often in situations of rape, I think they ought to think more. One issue is that obviously we are equating a living being to an inanimate object. Another issue is that by law, no one has the right to take anything from anyone's home or car. I can put expensive stuff in my car in the open and leave the doors unlocked, but still doesn't give someone the right to steal my stuff because it is not theirs to take. Same for a house. I can have nice things and leave my door unlocked. Doesn't mean someone has the right to go inside and take anything. I didn't "invite" anyone in either my car or house and am not "asking for" anyone to steal or rob my items. I could leave my door wide open. No one still has the right to take anything from my house or car without my permission and if caught taking anything of mine, they will be faced with a crime. In the same token, It doesn't matter if she's passed out drunk lying naked on the floor, you don't have the right to anyone else in any way. No one else's anything, including their person belongs to you. Why is that so hard? 

[jerkit]

Lot is working hard in her kitchen even though previously she says keepers at home don’t need to work on the weekends. They can go to the park or a beach. Huuuuge eye.

[lilwriter85]

I think Lori watches the news more than she claims to. During the last presidential election, it was clear that she and Ken were following the news closely. Remember Ken wanted to mentor Trump and Lori was oddly upset about Trump's attitude towards undocumented immigrants. I did wonder if Lori's nanny/housekeeper was in the US illegally and that was why she was upset. There are politicians who do want to punish citizens who employed undocumented immigrants under the table and if Lori and Ken ever did anything like that they may have been worried.

With the recent sexual harassment and assault allegations, I bet Lori is following the stories via the Internet or TV just so she somehow in her mind shame those men and women. I know several people who don't watch TV, but they are constantly reading news articles online and watching videos on YouTube and news sites.

[Petronella]

4 hours ago, Petronella said:

You can't know what was really going on between your friends here. Just because they were childhood sweethearts doesn't mean that they were good together. Yes, after twelve years, finally giving in to divorce may well be a relief with the grief having already been grieved. You say they didn't have good role models for relationships, so this could have been a sour relationship from the start, or irreparably harmed along the way. Your description seems very cavalier and judgmental.

Quoting myself because it's too late to add to the original post. Eowyn, I usually love the things you write. I think you are kind-hearted and brave. That's why this post surprised me.

[Curious]

2 hours ago, Leftitinmysnood said:

Why don't we all chat in Quiver full of Hobbies?

There is a craft club that has a knitting section.  Once I figure out how the knitting threads will be moved in there.

 

[jerkit]

If the comments on the modesty post aren’t directed at Alyssa then I don’t know what is

[Sarah92]

Seriously how dare she and these women say these things? Our respectability is not determined by how much clothing we're wearing. Our value is determined by God. Adam and Eve we're clothed because they became ashamed of what God created to be good.

Where in the Bible do we have permission to say a person should be treated with less respect? And where in the Bible does it say God commanded modesty for the reason she cites? Jesus died naked on the cross, was he any less respectable in those moments? Noah being drunk and naked did not give his sons permission to mock him. 

Also self-control is a fruit of the spirit so men are absolutely to control themselves and not sexually assault women. Jesus also said you pluck out YOUR OWN EYE not some else's .Or are you going to say sexual abused children were dressed immodestly too? 

I am angry and it really hard not to just type a bunch of cuss words. 

[Frog99]

@Sarah92 I had to walk away when I read those comments. Those women in that thread are the exact reason people leave or avoid the church- with their superior and judgemental ways. At our church, you may find people in pants, leggings, jeans, dresses, or skirts on any given Sunday. I’ve never been so distracted by someone’s body that I couldn’t worship God or focus on the sermon. In fact, I couldn’t tell you what my friend sitting right beside me had on. It makes me want to figure out where all of these people attend church so I can go just to see what on earth they are talking about. I have never known people to be so focused on a woman’s body. 

And I would love to find the other page where the woman is going to post the blog post- I’m guessing some of those ladies are the victim of judgement. 

[AuntKrazy]

If modest dress solved rape/sexual harrassment, then there would be no rape/harrassment in cultures where the women always wear burkas, and constant harrassment/rape in tribal cultures where people wear little clothing. I believe that anthropoligical studies show that the inverse is reality. (no reference handy, but I will look it up)

Logically, then, rigid modesty standards, therefore, objectify women more than cultures which are not fixated on hiding the female bidy.

[WhatWouldJohnCrichtonDo?]

22 minutes ago, Sarah92 said:

Or are you going to say sexual abused children were dressed immodestly too? 

Some of the materials I've seen posted on FJ from ATI/IBLP say that. It's revolting.

[Leftitinmysnood]

42 minutes ago, Curious said:

There is a craft club that has a knitting section.  Once I figure out how the knitting threads will be moved in there.

 

Thanks! I know there is a thread, but every time I check on it, the only fiber crafts happening are dust bunnies. 

[EowynW]

1 hour ago, Petronella said:

Quoting myself because it's too late to add to the original post. Eowyn, I usually love the things you write. I think you are kind-hearted and brave. That's why this post surprised me.

Oh that's fine. And you know, I apologize. I didn't have it worded as kindly as I should have.

[Sarah92]

1 hour ago, Frog99 said:

@Sarah92 I had to walk away when I read those comments. Those women in that thread are the exact reason people leave or avoid the church- with their superior and judgemental ways. At our church, you may find people in pants, leggings, jeans, dresses, or skirts on any given Sunday. I’ve never been so distracted by someone’s body that I couldn’t worship God or focus on the sermon. In fact, I couldn’t tell you what my friend sitting right beside me had on. It makes me want to figure out where all of these people attend church so I can go just to see what on earth they are talking about. I have never known people to be so focused on a woman’s body. 

And I would love to find the other page where the woman is going to post the blog post- I’m guessing some of those ladies are the victim of judgement. 

I totally agree. There's a reason why many are leaving the church and it's because of bs like this. How are people supposed to feel safe if they have to worrying about people judging them for their clothes? Or blaming them for their own traumas.

[Carol]

According to Lori, god was our first fashion designer.  WTF??  No offense but I'm glad he didn't give up his day job.  He's no Balenciaga.

[onemama]

Just a couple random thoughts:

Reading her posts against divorce, you'd think Lori doesn't believe God can heal all wounds. He's ok with the ones left by abuse, but the ones caused by divorce, even one's parents' divorce , are beyond his healing power. 

Completely unrelated:

Where is Ken's family?  I thought he was raised by wonderful Godly parents and had a whole bunch of siblings. Weren't his parents missionaries? Didn't Ken grow up in another country? 

 

[jerkit]

Alyssa is absolutely wearing a bikini on instagram. She looks great, she’s a very beautiful woman, and I don’t begrudge a grown woman from wearing whatever the fuck she wants to wear.

 

BUT GODDAMNIT LORI. Get your house in order before you complain about women in bikinis, yoga pants, or whatever the fuck you whine about. Especially when we know your headship is right there with her. 

[Koala]

Once in a while Lori writes something that is so shockingly disgusting, it literally takes me back a step.

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I briefly turned on the news last night and they were talking about all of the sexual harassment going on and one of the young women had a very immodest dress on that showed half of her breasts! It would help a lot for women to begin at least dressing modestly. When they are showing body parts that should be covered up, they are practically asking men to treat them with disrespect.

A reader replies:

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They feel that they should be able to dress anyway they darn well please and that men just need to control themselves

Umm, yes!  A man should be able to control himself.  If a man is going to sexually harass a woman, modest clothing IS NOT going to stop him.

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yes, women don’t want to be held accountable for anything and everything is men’s fault. There is a reason God commands women to dress modestly and even be shamefaced. It’s not only for their protection but in respect to the men around them. It’s a fact, women: men are VISUAL!

1) A woman IS NEVER at fault for a man sexually harassing her!

2) You don't need protection for decent men, and indecent men don't deserve your respect.  

3) It's a fact, women: men can control themselves!

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 yes, they are being stumbling blocks and causing "weaker" brothers to stumble. They will be held accountable for this.

Yes, Lori.  God is going to hold a woman accountable because a weak little man harassed her.  Right.

All comments pointing out that Lori is blaming the victims have been deleted.

I can only assume that today's hateful post is directed at Lori's own daughter...what a truly awful thing to do...

 

I have to wonder if Jilly is just messing with her here:

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I don’t understand this as a Mama of a beautiful daughter I taught her about modesty; we are blessed our daughter is a very modest lady by nature. But my question is do Mama’s just not teach it now days? 

Lori (who's very quick to offload any responsibility for the way her daughters dress):

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Even if mothers do teach them, Jilly, they can be heavily influenced by our culture, and even the younger women in the churches, to dress immodestly, sadly. I have never heard a sermon preached from the pulpit in a church I have attended about modesty. 

I believe the term Ken used (and Lori deleted) is Christian Risqué

[SilverBeach]

Fuck Lori.

[Grandma D]

I am new to Lori but am so curious what makes her tick. She is fascinating. Does anyone know which of her kids have kids? 

[Carol]

Dear Alyssa,  

I am proud of you for being yourself.  You dress appropriately, no matter what your mom says.  Please don't let her take you down, you don't deserve it.  I know it must be hard to read here because we are really hard on your mom, but I want you to know that it's more than likely we're all pulling for you.  Empathy is strong here no matter that this is a snark site.  We snark on the dangers of biblical literalism and those who practice it because it is so damaging mentally, emotionally and physically.  

There's a way out, just keep being you. 

[lilwriter85]

22 minutes ago, dsjbeam said:

I am new to Lori but am so curious what makes her tick. She is fascinating. Does anyone know which of her kids have kids? 

Three of her four kids have kids. Her older son Ryan has 3, Stephen has 1, and Cassi has 1 and is currently expecting her second child.

[dairyfreelife]

@dsjbeam what @lilwriter85 said and I feel I must add that her eldest daughter Alyssa is mentioned as having issues with infertility. This prompted Lori to be a complete bitch and tell her daughter with fertility issues that a baby is better than a puppy. If you want to know the type of person Lori is, that should give you a good idea. Also the funny story (her words) about how she didn't want to work anymore and Ken wanted her work until they had a second child, so she poked holes in her birth control method and got pregnant with her first son. Hilarious, right? Now she doesn't advocate that kind of deception, but it worked for her to get what she wanted. #sorrynotsorry? 

[RosyDaisy]

Don't forget. Lori broke her foot while trying to kick a cat out of her way. She missed the cat and hit her foot on the wall. That's what she gets for trying to hurt that beautiful creature.

[Sarah92]

Does Alyssa read here? 

Cause I just have to say, I checked out her Instagram. She's really pretty and looks very talented. I love her style. I hope she's able to be strong and follow where God leads her. If the modesty post is directed at her, I can't imagine how painful and embarrassing that might be.