The Hawkins Family

[Lurky]

Sis @Curious not only is she feeding him on the highway, but they have one of their kids standing up taking a photo while she does it.  The Fundy belief that they can do whatever they like in vehicles and God will protect them never fails to freak me out.

[Nikedagain?]

Sis @Curious he said it as nice as he can. After all, he don't like his wife to come up to upset or his family to hear your negotiate.  It's straight out of hell. 

[General Jinjur]

When Bro Gary needs his weens, he needs them NOW, dangit. To hell with safety. It WEEN TIME.

[nonymouse]

Ok, folks,

Anyone else singing "Good weens!" to the theme of "Good Eats"?

No? Just me... well, all y'all can thank me later now that you are. Back to lurking.

 

Sis I'm Laughing Too Hard at This Circus to Type Much More

[MarblesMom]

Sorry, I had to go there....  Hammer Time.

Good weens time, they can't touch me, good weens time
Good weens time, they can't touch me, good weens time
A real  job, I ain't never had a real job
Headline, boy, you lookin' at a headline
Good weens time, they can't touch me, good weens time
Good weens time, they can't touch me, good weens time
Feed time, watch me kill the scene, feed time
Feed time, we gon' steal the scene, feed time (hold up)

I am sure there are much more talented FJers who can hook us up for a killer version....

[Kailash]

Ok folks, 

Everytime I read ok folks and then Sis SoandSo, I crack up. This might be my favorite thread of all time. I feel so very sorry for the Ween kids though. 

Sis Kailash

[Curious]

On 9/7/2017 at 0:16 AM, Carol said:

Apparently those Virgos can be hell

As a Virgo, I can tell you that we can indeed be hell, especially if we have vertigo

[Curious]

On 9/7/2017 at 7:11 PM, Georgiana said:

I don't think this man has ever seen the word "marathon".  How do you even type out "sha-r-thon" and think "Yeah, that definitely looks like a word"? 

I thought maybe he was saying "share-a-thon" though I have no clue what that would be, much like I have no clue what 90% of the stuff he says means.

On 9/7/2017 at 7:27 PM, Carol said:

 Gary Hawkins

February 3, 2013 · People who are you going to choose tonight JESUS are supper bowel. How about it. 
Bro Gary

This guy is the gift that just keeps giving.  I think I've seen probably 10 things already that would make great post count titles.

I haven't had the nerve to listen to any of his speaking videos yet, but the way he writes, like are for or, makes me wonder if he has a hearing issue.  One that severe would probably affect his speech as well, I'd think.

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

Ok folks,

I don't think Bro Ween has a hearing issue. I think he's barely literate and spells words the way he says them -- are for our,  wont for want.  And for sure he never learned about punctuation.

Sis Red Hair Grammar Police

[Cleopatra7]

6 hours ago, Curious said:

I thought maybe he was saying "share-a-thon" though I have no clue what that would be, much like I have no clue what 90% of the stuff he says means.

Various Christian TV channels have share-a-thons, which I'm pretty sure are fundraising appeals couched in Christianese. I guess share-athon sounds more benign than grift-a-thon, which would be a more accurate term.

Sis Cleopatra7 

[pamplemousse]

Quote

 

Gary Hawkins

February 3, 2013 · People who are you going to choose tonight JESUS are supper bowel. How about it. 
Bro Gary

 

Just bringing this forward because I have been wondering what "supper bowel" is and now I have figured it out! He meant SUPER BOWL!  BTW... I'd have chosen the Ravens because choosing Jesus and choosing an NFL team are not mutually exclusive (at least, I don't think so), and because my ex-BF kinda got me into them* and old habits die hard.

Anyone up for creating a list of Bro Gary-isms if it hasn't been done already?  

*Kinda, not entirely. Despite their total patheticness, I still have to claim the Bores -- I mean, the Bears -- as my team because I lived in Chicago my whole life until a few years ago.

Sis pamplemousse

[General Jinjur]

OK folks, Becky is a GOD sent women, dontcha know.

Spoiler

Sis Jinjur

[Four is Enough]

If she's a God sent womEn, does she have a multiple personality? Is Bro Gary a polygamist?

just dickin around,

Sista Four

[MayMay1123]

Ok folks

is it wrong of me to really want the weenie man to know that we are discussing him? I'd really like to know what he would think of us! 

(Not really a) Sister May (because I am an only child married to an only child. I always wanted a sibling though) 

[AlwaysExcited]

Ok, folks,

"She is a GOD sent women" could be read as:

"She is a woman sent by God."
"She is several women in one, all sent by God." 
"She is a GOD! Send women!"

Sis. AlwaysExcited

[Nikedagain?]

6 minutes ago, MayMay1123 said:

is it wrong of me to really want the weenie man to know that we are discussing him? I'd really like to know what he would think of us!

 Sis, I think Bro Gary would definitely come right on over here and tell us exactly what he thinks in no uncertain and illiterate terms. 

Bro Gary is not a man to shy away from an intellectual argument...

[SuperNova]

13 hours ago, Kailash said:

Ok folks, 

Everytime I read ok folks and then Sis SoandSo, I crack up. This might be my favorite thread of all time. I feel so very sorry for the Ween kids though. 

Sis Kailash

Ok Folks,

Bro Gary calls his children weenie tots or pigs in blankets when they sleep. They have a puppy named Corndog. Sis Becky refers to Bro Gary as King Ween or Abe Froman, the weenie king of Chicago.

Sis Nova

[formerpastorswife]

30 minutes ago, Nikedagain? said:

 Sis, I think Bro Gary would definitely come right on over here and tell us exactly what he thinks in no uncertain and illiterate terms. 

Bro Gary is not a man to shy away from an intellectual argument...

But in an intellectual argument, is it still considered wrong to attack an unarmed man?

 

Sis. FormerPastor'sWife

[dairyfreelife]

9 hours ago, Curious said:

I thought maybe he was saying "share-a-thon" though I have no clue what that would be, much like I have no clue what 90% of the stuff he says means.

This guy is the gift that just keeps giving.  I think I've seen probably 10 things already that would make great post count titles.

I haven't had the nerve to listen to any of his speaking videos yet, but the way he writes, like are for or, makes me wonder if he has a hearing issue.  One that severe would probably affect his speech as well, I'd think.

Unlikely. Trust me, I grew up in southern Appalachia. His writing is just like everyone else uneducated and raised in podunk. I seen/We was, your/you're, wont/want, bathed instead of bathe, etc. I've actually seen worse than crazy Gary. Sometimes I wonder how some people managed to make it through school at all. 

[Georgiana]

Bro Gary is the metaphorical pigeon on the chess board.  He THINKS he's playing the game and winning, but in reality, he's just knocking over the pieces, shitting all over the board, and then strutting around like he's Bobby Fischer.  But in order to convince a pigeon they aren't playing chess right, you'd have to teach them how to play chess, which is well beyond the grasp of their bird brain.  

And I don't think Bro Gary's brain is much brighter. 

Hoping for Christ-honoring Weens to enter my mouth and life,

Sis Gee

[General Jinjur]

35 minutes ago, Georgiana said:

And I don't think Bro Gary's brain is much brighter.

You're giving King Ween way too much credit Sis. I know for a fact that my chickens are smarter than he is. Their Facebook posts make a lot more sense too.

Sis Jingur

[Dandruff]

2 hours ago, Georgiana said:

Bro Gary is the metaphorical pigeon on the chess board.  He THINKS he's playing the game and winning, but in reality, he's just knocking over the pieces, shitting all over the board, and then strutting around like he's Bobby Fischer.

+1

I think Bro Gary is a nitwit masquerading as a moron.

[General Jinjur]

Ok Becky, this was NOT FOR PUBLIC SHARING. Now you're out of compliance. Plexus is gonna be maaaad.

Spoiler

Sis Jinjur

[seattlechic]

4 hours ago, MayMay1123 said:

Ok folks

is it wrong of me to really want the weenie man to know that we are discussing him? I'd really like to know what he would think of us! 

(Not really a) Sister May (because I am an only child married to an only child. I always wanted a sibling though) 

 Sweet dreams are made of thissss..... la la l al al al aaaa

Fallen Sis Seattlechic

[anniebgood]

2 hours ago, Dandruff said:

+1

I think Bro Gary is a nitwit masquerading as a moron.

Sis Dandruff, I think you are oh so very right. 
And that picture of her feeding him, I'm pretty sure that's in a motor home. Those windows in front and on the side are much larger than a van or truck and not a car. Too bad they didn't know the Maxwells, I bet they could have gotten a good deal on Uriah. 

Sis Gee, Joe Naugler used the pigeon on a chess board analogy about Al too.