Lori Alexander 26: Fermented Pizza Crust Is More Important than Filling Her Empty Soul

[ChickenettiLuvr]

So ... today she's throwing a toddler tantrum about people's responses to her shitty words from yesterday. I refuse to read her latest screeches. Does anyone think she trolled here to gather steam for her rant today?

And seriously- how does she have time to stupid doodle more idiot words and have them so quickly at the ready?

She needs a buttkick of reality to her sorry wrinkly ass.

......

I understand 100% about parenting resilient kids over whiny drama queens. But there IS a happy medium. In our house, it meant keeping boring old bandaids available in the bathroom for DD's daily invisible boo boos. I kept the really cool ones hidden, but they came out for legit injuries only.

[Koala]

10 minutes ago, ChickenettiLuvr said:

So ... today she's throwing a toddler tantrum about people's responses to her shitty words from yesterday.

Yet, according to The Godly Mentor, a feminine woman shouldn't try to have the last word.

Lori:

Quote

A soft woman doesn't speak loudly. She isn't argumentative and demanding. She is never harsh with others. She doesn't insist on her own way and have angry outbursts when things don't go her way. She listens carefully to others.

Quote

She doesn't argue her point over and over but allows the other person to have the last word. 

 

[AlwaysDiscerning]

Babies need babied unless they bite your nipple when breastfeeding, then they need flicked in the cheek. Lori's words, not mine.
.

[Red Hair, Black Dress]

Who are these hard-hearted women who don't care for sick children?

A few days ago her leghumpers were trying to out poor each other. Now they are vying for the coveted title of "Least Compassionate. Least Empathetic, Never Nuturing Mother."

I bet Lori and these "muthas" are very fond of using the old "don't you cry or I'll give you something to cry about" threat followed by a smack. 

They are all acting like nurturing your children if they are sick/ hurt is a sin.

This is for you Lori -- because we all know you read here.

If suffering in silence is what we are called to do, then STFU about your illnesses - past and present.  No one wants to hear your whining and complaining about your bad gut, neck pain, headaches, cyber knife operation, and your constant refrain of you were so, so, so sick for 25 years.  Stop it.  Stop it Right. Now.  STFU and suffer in silence.  Practice what you preach. For once in your miserable life try not to be such a hypocrite.

[Jelly Babies]

Today a woman in the chat room said that when she asked her 4 year old son what he was going to do when he grew up, he said "work with dad".  Which is great, and adorable. But then when she asked him if he was going to help around the house, like do dishes, he said "no daddies don't do dishes, only mommies." She was happy about this.

I wanted to s c r e a m

[jerkit]

8 minutes ago, Jelly Babies said:

Today a woman in the chat room said that when she asked her 4 year old son what he was going to do when he grew up, he said "work with dad".  Which is great, and adorable. But then when she asked him if he was going to help around the house, like do dishes, he said "no daddies don't do dishes, only mommies." She was happy about this.

I wanted to s c r e a m

What was the general response?

[Jelly Babies]

1 minute ago, jerkit said:

What was the general response?

There weren't any responses, but a few likes and laughing faces (Idk what they're called lol). So people thought it was a good thing 

[polecat]

The thing about raising resilient children is:

It's not done by forcing your kids to suck it up.

It's done by meeting your children's age-appropriate needs consistently and reliably. So when your baby bites down because she's teething and hurting, you remove her from your breast, get a cool washcloth and massage her gums. When your toddler falls and bumps his head while he's learning to walk, you help him get up, kiss his boo-boo and get him walking again. When your pre-schooler splats face-first on the playground, you give her a hug and kiss and help her back on the swings. When your grade schooler comes home with hurt feelings because of a playground misunderstanding, you work with him to find some ways to address future misunderstandings. You have your kid's back.

What you don't do is tell the kid to knock off that whining already and rub mommy's feet. Oh, and shut up because mommy needs her two hours of sleep every afternoon. By the way, where's mommy's potato? "Make her feel bad, you know?" 

Funny thing, isn't it, how the only person allowed to bitch and moan in Lori's house is Lori. I guess her parents babied her too damn much.

 

[polecat]

4 hours ago, louisa05 said:

Oh, I know it isn't. I've been reading Lori long enough, thank you. 

But all the talk that ensued here of "you absolutely must baby sick and injured kids"...well, a kid with pneumonia is different than a kid with a minor cold. A kid with a broken leg is different than a kid with a knee scrape. And when you baby the minor cold and the scraped knee, you end up with an adult who doesn't function when he gets a paper cut. 

I didn't see anyone talking about babying kids through head colds. 

What you're talking about, I've seen, but I've only seen it rarely. I know exactly one family that does it (and the mom is an RN, go figure). I've never seen such a Band-Aid obsessed group of children as those kids, lol. I don't even own Band-Aids, so when they come over here and have life-threatening bleeding (otherwise known as "oops, bumped my toe on a carpet fuzzy while wearing tennis shoes), I just send them home for first aid. 

But it's really the exception rather than the rule. Most moms give their kids a bit of extra spoiling when they're sick -- actually sick, not with a head cold but with the flu or gastroenteritis or something similar. 

[AuntKrazy]

Teaching a child to "suffer in silence" can be a recipe for risking their health and lives.  This scares me quite a bit as someone who has diabetes and thyroid disease.  Hunger, thirst, tiredness are often the first indicators a child may have something medically wrong.  Open communication is essential, so that a parent can determine whether the child needs to learn coping mechanisms or if something is wrong.

The core problem is the shutting down of communication.  Lori does not seem to equate the attitude of "go suffer in silence" with a message of "you are not worth listening to", but that is exactly what such neglect does to a child.  

Communication is the key to all healthy relationships.  Parent-child, within friendship, and within marriage.  

[TeddyBonkers]

Here is my "suffer in silence" story, take it for what it's worth.

Years ago, when I was still in the Army, I had a really great First Sergeant. He would go to bat for you no matter what-but there was one thing that he couldn't stand, and that was a "Sick Call Ranger". His motto was "suck it up and drive on". Got a little bit of a fever, take an aspirin and get back to work.

Needless to say, I never went to sick call. My stomach started hurting one day, and I figured, eh, it would go away eventually. Then it didn't. Next thing you know, I'm stumbling to sick call at 2 AM, getting helicoptered to a hospital, and having my appendix cut right out before it explodes.

[Florita]

2 hours ago, ChickenettiLuvr said:

So ... today she's throwing a toddler tantrum about people's responses to her shitty words from yesterday. I refuse to read her latest screeches. Does anyone think she trolled here to gather steam for her rant today?

My theory is these rants are directed at her daughter and/or DILs. Last week she posted a 3 generation picture with her daughter and grandbaby. My guess is that baby or one of the other grandbabies is teething and baby's mommy is comforting her and possibly even missing sleep to hold her. Lori doesn't approve of children who do inconvenient things (like get sick) because that takes the attention off of Lori. Lori believes the child should be allowed to cry it out and toughen up. Cuz ain't nobody had pain and suffering like Lori!

[lilwriter85]

41 minutes ago, AuntKrazy said:

Teaching a child to "suffer in silence" can be a recipe for risking their health and lives.  .

The core problem is the shutting down of communication.  Lori does not seem to equate the attitude of "go suffer in silence" with a message of "you are not worth listening to", but that is exactly what such neglect does to a child.  

Communication is the key to all healthy relationships.  Parent-child, within friendship, and within marriage.  

These are things that piss me about Lori's doodle. I hate to say this, but one of her leghumpers' kids is going to eventually suffer because of the beliefs of Lori and their mothers.

2 hours ago, Red Hair, Black Dress said:

Who are these hard-hearted women who don't care for sick children?

A few days ago her leghumpers were trying to out poor each other. Now they are vying for the coveted title of "Least Compassionate. Least Empathetic, Never Nuturing Mother."

 

If suffering in silence is what we are called to do, then STFU about your illnesses - past and present.  No one wants to hear your whining and complaining about your bad gut, neck pain, headaches, cyber knife operation, and your constant refrain of you were so, so, so sick for 25 years.  Stop it.  Stop it Right. Now.  STFU and suffer in silence.  Practice what you preach. For once in your miserable life try not to be such a hypocrite.

Well, if some of the leghumpers are really as poor as they claim I wouldn't put it past some of them to teach their children to "suffer in silence" as a way of preventing their kids from asking to go go the doctor because the leghumpers might not have any form of insurance. Or, sadly I can see some crazy legumper living in poverty telling her kids not to complain about being sick because they can't afford medical care and they will just better on their own. As other FJers have said making children suffer in slience is just too risky.

I agree, if Lori is going to push children not to complain when ill or injured then she should do the same. We have evidence that she basically expected her father and daughter to baby her during an illness. I totally get that being ill makes you grumpy and mean I have been guilty of that in the past. But, Lori tries to act as if she's not that way.   I'm willing to bet if Lori ends up with a health issue she will blog about it again or will have Ken writ a blog post on her behalf.

[Chocolatedefrauded]

Eh, I've had pretty nasty head colds myself, where I just wanted to die cause I could not breathe. I cut my kid some slack when she has a head cold. Maybe she can sleep a little late, get a ride to school instead of waiting out in the snow for the bus. But not lay in bed & miss school.

the problem is some schools are so strict about not letting sick kids go to school. They go overboard. Like you cannot go to school unless it's been 24 hours or more SINCE your last fever, vomit, etc. Sometimes they want a doctor's note to go back to class. They consider a fever a temp of 99 or 100. Our MD says a fever is 101. A kid could throw up & then be fine, but still have to stay home for another day.

I understand they want to make sure a sick kid doesn't spread germs around but it is hard to miss 2 days of work when your child has been fine for a day. Last year, I let my kid go to school with a head cold & she was questioned by her teacher about "why aren't you staying home? Why doesn't your mom keep you home?" Like I was a neglectful parent. Basically you can't win!

[elliha]

11 minutes ago, Chocolatedefrauded said:

Eh, I've had pretty nasty head colds myself, where I just wanted to die cause I could not breathe. I cut my kid some slack when she has a head cold. Maybe she can sleep a little late, get a ride to school instead of waiting out in the snow for the bus. But not lay in bed & miss school.

the problem is some schools are so strict about not letting sick kids go to school. They go overboard. Like you cannot go to school unless it's been 24 hours or more SINCE your last fever, vomit, etc. Sometimes they want a doctor's note to go back to class. They consider a fever a temp of 99 or 100. Our MD says a fever is 101. A kid could throw up & then be fine, but still have to stay home for another day.

I understand they want to make sure a sick kid doesn't spread germs around but it is hard to miss 2 days of work when your child has been fine for a day. Last year, I let my kid go to school with a head cold & she was questioned by her teacher about "why aren't you staying home? Why doesn't your mom keep you home?" Like I was a neglectful parent. Basically you can't win!

24 hours is nothing. Many schools and preschools here in Sweden have 36 hours if there is any chance that it might be stomach flu and 48 hours for other types of vomiting. Fevers are 24 hours. You don't need a doctor's note though and I assume some parents cheat. I never do with vomiting since I absolutely hate it myself when kids throw up but I have sent my daughter to preschool when it has been something like 16-20 hours since she last had a fever if she appears healthy and wants to go back herself. 

[SilverBeach]

Aunt Lori truly is the poster child for Gilead. We don't mollycoddle children in Gilead, suck it up babies!

How heartless and ridiculous. Even if my kid was exaggerating, I still wouldn't encourage her to suffer in silence. That's a horrible term. Help the child learn to self-sooth, not suffer. That's not what Jesus would do.

What a cold, heartless bitch of a mother Lori was. I wouldn't let her within a mile of my children if I was one of her offspring. She's a blatant hypocrite too, nobody plays that little violin better than Lori. We'll never figure out what is wrong with her, but she seems to be missing an essential part of being human, and hides her extreme ugliness under a biblical veneer. A million UGHs.

On second thought, children in Gilead would probably be treated much better than children in Lori's house because they were rare and therefore precious. 

[kpmom]

4 hours ago, Red Hair, Black Dress said:

If suffering in silence is what we are called to do, then STFU about your illnesses - past and present.  No one wants to hear your whining and complaining about your bad gut, neck pain, headaches, cyber knife operation, and your constant refrain of you were so, so, so sick for 25 years. 

Remember when Lori had her last surgery a couple or so years ago?

Her doctor wanted to put it off for a bit, not for a medical reason, maybe he was going to be away, I don't recall.  Lori told him she was too sick to wait and wanted to have the surgery as soon as possible.

I wouldn't even have blamed her for not wanting to wait, I'd want to get it over with as soon as possible too, but really what a hypocrite.   Everyone else can suffer in silence but not Lori.

[Hane]

Back when I was pregnant, friends invited me to dinner at their house. During the dinner, their baby, who was about six months old and who had been put  to bed hours earlier, started to fuss and whine. I figured they should just ignore him and he'd go back to sleep, but his mom said, "I'm going to check on him--something doesn't sound right." I had many years of babysitting experience, and thought she was being overindulgent. I'm eternally glad that I kept my yap shut, because the very next morning he cut his first tooth. I kept this in mind when my own baby was born. 

[Fluffy14]

My husband grew up in a house, where is was suck it up buttercup. Each of the four kids had to learn to fend for themselves and look out for number one, because no sympathy was coming their way if they were ill or injured. All four kids grew up into selfish, and angry adults. It has taken years for my husband to learn compassion.

[desertvixen]

@Chocolatedefrauded - Yes yes yes!

When we were stationed at Carson, the schools deemed a fever to be 99.5.  The clinic doctor got irritated when I took my daughter in after she was sent home from school, until I showed him the note.  He had a ... strongly worded response.

Obviously if the kid still has a fever, is actively queasy (feels like they might puke again), is listless, they need to stay home.  Otherwise, they should be able to go to school.

[EmiGirl]

5 minutes ago, desertvixen said:

@Chocolatedefrauded - Yes yes yes!

When we were stationed at Carson, the schools deemed a fever to be 99.5.  

I would be forever banned. My temp is about 99.7 all the time.

[desertvixen]

@EmiGirl, yes my girl also runs a little hot.  And I run a little cold...which makes fever decisions fun!

[ChickenettiLuvr]

Further thoughts on kids & illness...

Our household rule was school unless fever or vomiting. Then if no school, no dance, sports, friends, or anything fun.

DS never pulled the fake sick crap, thank Rufus.

Because DD? She had every-morning-itis from kindergarten through senior year. Gah. So new house rule for her: No TV!!! 

And if no fever or barf, They had to go ahead to school until noon. If still sick, they could call me then. And DD wasn't allowed to miss if on a test day. Cuz... that's how she drove me crazy. Oy.

In high school, she chose to live with the ex because he couldn't be bothered to know what she was doing. So when she'd call me at work with crocodile tears? Nope. Call your dad to call you in. I'm not there to vouch that you're sick.

Finally the dean of students got involved when DD hadn't attended a full week all semester, unknown to me. Out of frustration and no other options for her crying wolf, DD started getting automatic detention for each absence. She had an amazingly quick "recovery" from her deathbed.

School staff was in awe that I wouldn't play DD's sick game any longer. (Apparently other parents in same school with same issue would lie until they die for said student. I was so over being manipulated that I didn't care who was mad at me at that point.)

It's still The Dreaded Topic of Doom with DD. 

Peanut butter, anyone????

.... Sorry ... not trying to piss everyone off intentionally. It's been another shitty day at my new job. New boss can't keep anyone because he's such an asshole. I thought I could handle it. But, as we know, you can't ever win with a control freak. The rules change daily and he keeps moving the bar. It's seriously like working for my manipulative, conniving ex.

This is NOT a good thing for my depression and anxiety. Going to start looking for something else tomorrow. In the meantime, pass the rum and the Ben & Jerry's. 

I'll see myself to the prayer closet now. It has room service, right??

......

I'm confused. What or where is Gilead? @SilverBeach

[smittykins]

Hugs, @ChickenettiLuvr.

It's my understanding that some schools have stopped giving perfect-attendance awards because it discourages sick kids from staying home.

[Emilycharlotte]

With a stomach virus, you are usually contagious for 3 days after the vomiting/diarrhea stops; in some cases,  you are contagious for up to three weeks. The degree of contagiousness (is that a word?) decreases with time after the active symptoms stop. 

In other words, your kid is still highly contagious for at least 24 hours after they quit puking (probably a bit longer), and they shouldn't be at school or anywhere else. No, you can't keep them home three extra weeks, but 24 hours with no active symptoms is hardly unreasonable.