Carlin and Evan 1: Front Hugging Before Courting

[JordynDarby5]

2 hours ago, stardust said:

That's what confused me about Nathan and Ashley's courtship. They held hands and carelessly threw around 'I love you' during the special friend stage, only to abandon ship mid-courtship because it suddenly dawned on them that they would actually have to get married. Watching Nathan cry on national television after the break up sure didn't seem like his heart was protected to me...(also do we have any evidence that the Bates have ever actually used the 'pieces of your heart' Duggar phrase because if so the way their courting couples behave is extremely hypocritical) 

Yes, his heart wasn't protected. He was really hurt by the courtship ending. So was Zach when his first courtship also ended. It doesn't protect anything. 

[Kangaroo]

Can I ask, does "dating" have different meanings in different parts of the US?

Google seems to suggest that "dating" has different meanings in different places, so I'm curious what you all think.

I feel like I've seen Gil and Kelly also refer to their children with special friends as dating, along with the phrases boyfriend and girlfriend so I don't really get what the difference is.

[Seculardaisy]

10 hours ago, Kangaroo said:

Can I ask, does "dating" have different meanings in different parts of the US?

Google seems to suggest that "dating" has different meanings in different places, so I'm curious what you all think.

I feel like I've seen Gil and Kelly also refer to their children with special friends as dating, along with the phrases boyfriend and girlfriend so I don't really get what the difference is.

To me dating doesn't mean you're necessarily boyfriend and girlfriend but if you and a person you're interested in decide to see a movie together, go to dinner, go wherever under the pretense of seeing if there's a spark then that's a date IMO. But being somebody's boyfriend or girlfriend I believe comes from a conversation on the matter and deciding to become those things to each other.

[veron1que]

12 hours ago, Kangaroo said:

Can I ask, does "dating" have different meanings in different parts of the US?

Google seems to suggest that "dating" has different meanings in different places, so I'm curious what you all think.

I feel like I've seen Gil and Kelly also refer to their children with special friends as dating, along with the phrases boyfriend and girlfriend so I don't really get what the difference is.

I'm in the mid-Atlantic region. Dating means everything from someone you are seeing semi-regularly to bf/gf. It can be super casual or not.

However, I will say in H.S. and college it was more often known as "talking" and "dating" implied you were in some type of relationship.

[Seculardaisy]

16 minutes ago, veron1que said:

I'm in the mid-Atlantic region. Dating means everything from someone you are seeing semi-regularly to bf/gf. It can be super casual or not.

However, I will say in H.S. and college it was more often known as "talking" and "dating" implied you were in some type of relationship.

Ha you're so right I completely forgot that back in high school we always used the term "talking."

[veron1que]

15 hours ago, stardust said:

(also do we have any evidence that the Bates have ever actually used the 'pieces of your heart' Duggar phrase because if so the way their courting couples behave is extremely hypocritical) 

I'm not sure they have used it, though it's common in purity circles and I'm sure they have heard the term used.

 

As far as hypocritical, they haven't been. The Bates parents have always maintained that how a couple choices to show affection before marriiage is between that couple and god. Take this bit from their blog.

 

Spoiler

Kelly

July 19, 2013 at 6:12 pm

Dear Luann,
I agree wholeheartedly. I have much admiration for couples who do decide to have a hands off relationship. I think the goal either way should be to honor God and maintain purity. To make one set of couple feel like their choice is “more special” than another’s is actually perspective…and that varies with people…and it can put pressure for them to conform to other’s opinions. I think each couple needs to seek God’s direction for them…and then realize it is just that…THEIR choice…not a dictate for all. We need to encourage each couple who are striving for wholesomeness, whether they choose to hold hands or not . Love, Kelly

 

There have been a variety of standards among the Bates children. For example, Whitney and Zach kissed before marriage. I do agree, the courtship model is useless to someone like Carlin. She has forsaken the so called protections that courtship offers by having a regular boyfriend. That may be fine with her, but she has not protected herself from the heartbreak us heathens endure.

 

 

[BeccaGrim]

22 hours ago, Andrea said:

It seems that even her parents are trying to put the breaks on the relationship where as with the other couples they appear all for it.  Its probably  because  of how immature she acts.  Which leads me to wonder is it the editing on the show that makes her appear  more immature? 

I haven't seen her parents try to put the breaks on the relationship. 

[Nikedagain?]

17 hours ago, JordynDarby5 said:

So was Zach when his first courtship also ended. It doesn't protect anything. 

Lordy. Poor hyper sweaty, emotional Zach.  

[HRM1216]

19 hours ago, Kangaroo said:

Can I ask, does "dating" have different meanings in different parts of the US?

Google seems to suggest that "dating" has different meanings in different places, so I'm curious what you all think.

I feel like I've seen Gil and Kelly also refer to their children with special friends as dating, along with the phrases boyfriend and girlfriend so I don't really get what the difference is.

In the Midwest (SW Ohio) and as a 23 year old, dating means boyfriend/girlfriend almost exclusively. 

If you're "getting to know" each other we call it "talking". Dating is entering a relationship. 

If you are casually going on dates with someone we usually put that under the "talking" category. 

Just my take, though! 

[Seculardaisy]

4 hours ago, HRM1216 said:

In the Midwest (SW Ohio) and as a 23 year old, dating means boyfriend/girlfriend almost exclusively. 

I'm from the Midwest as well!

[RosyDaisy]

Alabama here. Dating usually means being in an exclusive relationship.

[LittleOwl]

I volunteer with teenagers here in the UK.... And they said that they are "linking" when you're talking to someone but you're not dating and you're seeing if you want to date them.. or something like that. There's a new word every time I see them I get lost haha 

Far too complicated for little ole me 

 

[Italiangirl]

Not sure if Carlin and Evan will court soon but based on this i will day that is easy even if they seems so immature...

Spoiler

 

[JmW]

I am guessing that Gil and Kelly suggest Carlin and Evan pray about courtship a little longer.  I am also going to guess Bobby shows up for a surprise engagement.

[Hmmm_idolatry]

Just coming here to post this. Carlin has some hurricane survival tips.  

 

https://www.instagram.com/p/BY3nzT_AWN8/?taken-by=carlinbates98

[singsingsing]

I'm so glad she chose such a totes adorbs selfie to illustrate Floridians' need to find Jesus in the midst of a Category 3 hurricane. Carlin's super cute top knot and righteous use of emojis has certainly brought me closer to the Lord and has reminded me to always look fun and pretty while praying for the victims of natural disasters.

[Hmmm_idolatry]

1 minute ago, singsingsing said:

I'm so glad she chose such a totes adorbs selfie to illustrate Floridians' need to find Jesus in the midst of a Category 3 hurricane. Carlin's super cute top knot and righteous use of emojis has certainly brought me closer to the Lord and has reminded me to always look fun and pretty while praying for the victims of natural disasters.

You've said it better than I could.  She annoys the hell out of me and there simply aren't enough eye-rolling emojis in the world that can convey how I felt when I saw her post.  

[BeccaGrim]

I agree. She's all about Carlin all of the time. 

[VelociRapture]

3 hours ago, Hmmm_idolatry said:

Just coming here to post this. Carlin has some hurricane survival tips.  

 

https://www.instagram.com/p/BY3nzT_AWN8/?taken-by=carlinbates98

I'm going to guess what she shared before actually looking. Just for fun:

1. Something about Jesus and her not being worthy.

2. Something about praying for Florida.

3. Something about Jesus again.

4. Shares Bible quote she thinks is relevant.

5. Photo of her where she thinks she looks damn good and thoughtful, instead of a more appropriate photo that says something like "prayers for Florida."

6. Closes out with #blessed #jesusistheanswer #prayersforflorida 

ETA: Just looked. Close enough. 

[faraway]

3 hours ago, Hmmm_idolatry said:

Just coming here to post this. Carlin has some hurricane survival tips.  

 

https://www.instagram.com/p/BY3nzT_AWN8/?taken-by=carlinbates98

I saw this earlier and it made me angry. What I really dislike about the Bates is that they treat their kids like their limited opinions/skills/talent really matter and they should share it with the world. Someone needs to tell them that they're basic and lazy and of little use to society. I give credit to someone like Zach who STFU and actually does something. 

[Jigsaw3]

I have no time for Carlin, but she's still pretty young. Zack was probably pretty self-centred at her age too: he's got the benefit of some life experience now, both broken heart pieces and the responsibility for a growing family. They've given him some maturity. My hope for Carlin is that she gains similar maturity as she ages.

[Palindrome]

Oh, Carlin. Your ignorance is showing. 

[HereticHick]

My alltime favorite Carlin hashtag is #Jesuslovesthemall

[Eternalbluepearl]

I thought it was interesting that Gil referred to Carlin as just a kid when discussing the topic of courtship. Interesting because Carlin is 19 and I seem to recall Alyssa getting married as a teenager. I would think with the way Carlin and Evan are head over heels for each other and wanting to make things official, that Kelly and Gil would be thrilled. Then again, it may just be that they think Carlin and Evan aren't mature enough for marriage but Alyssa and John were. 

[JPickleDuggar]

1 hour ago, Eternalbluepearl said:

I thought it was interesting that Gil referred to Carlin as just a kid when discussing the topic of courtship. Interesting because Carlin is 19 and I seem to recall Alyssa getting married as a teenager. I would think with the way Carlin and Evan are head over heels for each other and wanting to make things official, that Kelly and Gil would be thrilled. Then again, it may just be that they think Carlin and Evan aren't mature enough for marriage but Alyssa and John were. 

I think John may have had a stable enough job to provide for a family by then, and from the looks of it Evan may not. I believe Alyssa did a lot for the family, apparently the most organized Bates. So that probably had a lot to do with the approval to get married young.