Dillards 32: To VBAC or not to VBAC

[BabyBottlePop]

14 minutes ago, singsingsing said:

We don't know that she waited on purpose. It could be that she was trying and trying and trying and just couldn't get pregnant again for a couple of years. I recall them making a few statements that definitely made it seem like they were not preventing. 

Yeah. Her body might have needed that time to heal and she wouldn't have waited if she'd gotten pregnant sooner. 

I hope she can be happy with Izzy and Samuel and not destroy what little family she has going after a goal that could kill her.

[jerkit]

2 minutes ago, nst said:

and bam because they knew it 

she delivered by c section again - is anyone else surprised? 40 hours of labour - my goodness

my estimate she will only allowed to get pregnant again in March 2019 
and he is HUGE 

Who won the poll ?

I think this is going to be a quick turnaround and she'll be pregnant again by march 2018. 

No reason for this, I just like making fundie predictions lol 

[frugalitymom]

Hope mom and baby are ok.  I hope someone convinces Jill that a small family doesn't make you any less of a woman.  She needs to take longer this time to heal before attempting baby 3 and realize death due to excessive c-sections is not worth it.  I don't think she will be able to have a natural home birth from now on and maybe one more should be it.

[Jana814]

47 minutes ago, Jaedzia said:

Ditto, my father's 83 birthday today!

My father is 71. Does not a day over 60. 

[MoonFace]

52 minutes ago, JoyJoy said:

I don't think Jill will be shamed.  (snip)

As long as she keeps getting pregnant she's doing her job.   Maybe not the way others would but she is still adding to the congregation  cult family.  After all, it's quantity not quality for them. 

[Imagine20]

I wonder if they did wait like they were told and a VBAC still wasn't in the cards, so they'll just keep trying after whatever the number of days after a boy is born.  Jill may resign herself to the fact that she will probably deliver in the hospital with a C every time. Might as well grow the quiver while they can, especially now that you've got Jessa, Jinjer, Joy, Anna, and soon Kendra to compete with. 

It's so sad that pregnancy can be a competition and women will put their lives in jeopardy for a perfect home birth or just to have more kids than another. 

[Oudler]

Thankyou for the kind words. When I heard this story it made me want to cry. Im So sorry to hear this. Although I did suffer emotionally and physically at the time, I thank God every day that it wasn't worse because it easily could have been for myself or my babies. I felt safer than I really was because I was across the street from the hospital, but when your hemmorhaging with a retained placenta 40 minutes can be deadly. I share my story with anyone considering the home birth option just because I feel the story could be used for good. I've shared it on a few websites, and it helps me be more at peace if it can prevent tragedies. 
I know people will do their own research and make their own choices, but the truth is we are quite lucky to have access to life saving medical care if we need it. If I had been farther away from a hospital I don't even want to imagine what could have happened. 
Do you guys think that in their cult c-sections are frowned upon because it means possibly less babies? They were minutes away from needing to give me a hysterectomy on my first baby, so I'm just wondering if this is why they tend to avoid hospitals? I know Meechelle has a few c sections, and hospital births so that gives me hope they would value the baby's safety mor than having eleventy more babies. Wishful thinking?

A friend of mine almost died because there was a problem with the c-section of the first baby, during the pregnancy with the second child... the two kids would have been 3 years apart but the placenta was damaged at the place of the previous c-section... the little boy died just before the due date... if she didn't choose to go to the hospital for birth, she would have died too, leaving her husband and her 3 year old son alone...

I think it's very sad that things like that can happen when everything seems to be ok... I would never do a home birth because you never know...

[nst]

14 minutes ago, jerkit said:

I think this is going to be a quick turnaround and she'll be pregnant again by march 2018. 

 

I think you are thinking of Jessa

 

[Mela99]

I don't think the lack of pictures and details is anything more than saving details for People. Why give it away for free when you can get paid ?

[Shadoewolf]

I wonder if we'll get a lot less info this time around because of the backlash Jill received after Izzy's birth. Especially if the deliveries are similar.

[KelseyAnn]

Unless a month goes by without pictures, I'm gonna assume Jill just wants paid for the People spread. Any longer than that and I'm gonna start worrying about Zika. 

[Kangaroo]

I don't see anything strange or off about the lack of the phrase "Mum and baby are doing fine" or their being no photo.

Derek simply may have wanted to be the first to announce. Because of the time of the cesarean, they may have been unable to have visitors yet. (By the time Jill is in recovery and actually with the baby, visiting hours may have ended). They might be waiting for Izzy, the rest of the family or a photographer to come tomorrow before releasing any photos.

I don't think "make sure internet strangers aren't able to overanalyse my statement" was at the forefront of his mind after 40 hours in labour ending in a C-Section.

[crazysnark]

If Jill and baby are healthy and ok I am also happy she had another c section. Pretty much for the same reason I am happy Michael Bates can't get pregnant so easily. I don't wish heartache on anyone but Jill and Michael were at the top of my list of "Most likely to Be A Baby Hoarder" and these issues are preventing them from having too many children that will go on to be neglected. 

[sadiZ]

Throwing this in there RE them waiting to get pregnant again. She breast fed for a long time (recent episode with the consignment sale shopping she was still breastfeeding Izzy). That could very well have been part of the gap. I stopped at 12 months with my son and didn't get my cycle back until after that. I know every woman is different, but perhaps that has something to do with it? Knowing their philosophy, I doubt they would have prevented on purpose. That isn't "God's plan". 

[ThunderRolls]

1 minute ago, Imagine20 said:

I wonder if they did wait like they were told and a VBAC still wasn't in the cards, so they'll just keep trying after whatever the number of days after a boy is born.  Jill may resign herself to the fact that she will probably deliver in the hospital with a C every time. Might as well grow the quiver while they can, especially now that you've got Jessa, Jinjer, Joy, Anna, and soon Kendra to compete with. 

It's so sad that pregnancy can be a competition and women will put their lives in jeopardy for a perfect home birth or just to have more kids than another. 

So I went to a "Fundie-lite" undergraduate college and was required to take a bunch of theology courses. One of the courses was about Christianity and families. We had a pastor come in as an "expert" to speak with us about how to properly incorporate Christian values into one's family. Anyway, condoms and the rhythm method were the only acceptable birth control. Those of us who asked about situations in which a woman's life would be put at risk due to pregnancy or a high risk labor were explicitly told by this pastor that it's "God's will" if the woman dies, and the life of the child is more important to save - doesn't matter if there's a brood of kids already at home, the mother must sacrifice herself to truly do the Christian thing. It seems like this is the attitude the Duggars and their ilk seem to possess, and there's a false sense of nobility in martyring oneself in order to bring another Christian baby into the quiver. I hope Jill isn't foolish enough to go along with it, but Derick is pretty out there. Based on Ben's reaction to Jessa's second labor, I'm not as worried for her - Ben seemed truly scared that something bad could happen to his wife and had a sense of what would be missing in his and their children's lives if something happened to her. 

[crazysnark]

Yes to the above. Jill and Anna seem to not only nurse but nurse on demand and for a longerperiod of time. I can see Jessa scheduling feedings and supplementing more than Anna or Jill which could have been a reason she got pregnant with number 2 so quickly.

 

That being said I nursed on demand and got my period back at 6 weeks postpartum. My OB/GYN said "oh my God, You are Michelle Duggar!". Worst thing anyone has ever said to me haha

[PainfullyAware]

I'm glad to hear that Jill safely delivered baby Samuel. I don't know much about c-sections but why is it dangerous to have multiple procedures  (beyond the normal risks of surgery)? In an earlier post someone had mentioned that if the first couple of children are delivered by c-section then it becomes increasingly difficult to have a vaginal delivery - does this mean Jill will now have to deliver all future children by surgery?

Jill will continue to get pregnant as often as she can. I read on the Above Rubies site a comparison between missionary work and having babies: missionaries go to 'dangerous' places and risk their health and safety (not my words) to convert people to 'God's army's, just like mothers should deliver baby soldiers for God's army regardless of the personal cost. They literally said that doctors greatly exaggerate the dangers of multiple births but that even if your life is at risk, you should still try to get pregnant and deliver.

[Fjrocks]

Two initial thoughts (that may change as we have more info)-

1.   That announcement was written on the fly and the original announcement that they had 9 months (and 40 hours of labor) to eloquently craft was scrapped.   I reread Jessa's announcement from mere hours after her second delivery and it's completely different, it mentioned mom and baby doing well AND OF COURSE GOD and his blessings. 

2.    After two lengthy deliveries that show poor judgement....Jill's midwife career is dead before it even begins. 

 

 

[adidas]

2 hours ago, Coconut Flan said:

I seriously doubt Jill was in hard labor for 40 hours.  I never believed her long, long labor with Izzie either.  I think they count from when their water breaks even if labor doesn't immediately ensue or else they are counting from a Braxton-Hicks contraction they confused with early labor after the fact.

I agree. I don't think a "40 hour" labour means 40 hours of hard labour. 

I was standing in a cafe ordering a coffee when I felt a distinctive tightening of my belly - unlike any of the braxton hicks I'd had before. I noted the time ... and sure enough they kept coming at regular intervals. I count that first contraction as the start of my labour even though it was early labour. It didn't get hard until about 9 hours after that, and my baby wasn't born until 24 hours after the first contraction. So I'm guessing that Jill didn't dive straight into hard labour

My SIL laboured for a few hours before a scheduled repeat c-section. When I asked her why they didn't just section her straight away she said that her obgyn recommends women have a few hours of labour - she told me a reason but I can't remember it. Before that, I had no idea it was a thing. She didn't get into hard labour though. 

I have a friend who grew up quiverfull and had 3 c-sections. The dr told her she could have a maximum of 4. After the third she decided she couldn't go through it again - as far as I know, she and her family held the opinion that while they were sad that she wouldn't know the joy of having a huge family, they accepted that she couldn't do it for medical reasons. They said it was more important for her children to have their mother around than risk a deadly situation (her c-sections were due to her placenta attaching in a weird way and with each pregnancy the risk of placenta accreta increased exponentially).

I can only hope that if Drs recommend Jill has a small family, she puts her health above a religious ideal. I'm not sure she has that maturity though. Or that JB and Michelle will support her if she does follow a dr's wishes. We've already seen her ignore medical advice regarding pregnancy (ie not fall pregnant until 2018 because few zika) so it's worrying. 

[BadMammaJana]

20 hours ago, Henk12 said:

So on the subject of laundry...Have any of you guys ever stripped? 

I started cloth diapering, so I might have to if I move and find out the hard way that we have hard water. I never thought about it for regular laundry though. I feel like I need to do this with my husband's shirts. I can't for the life of me get his deodorant/pit stains out of his military uniform and shirts. 

[Lurker]

 I was in bed rest for 6 weeks with my first, with medication to control persistent contractions.  I was hospitalized three times for more IV meds during this time too.  When the labor stories start to get like fish stories, I always bring out that I had contractions for six weeks, followed by a unmediated vaginal delivery (without prep classes).  This usually stops the ridiculous stories.

[adidas]

3 hours ago, Lurky said:

I'm genuinely scared that one day we'll be talking about a Quiverfull homebirth without adequate medical support that did go horribly wrong, and it'll be terrible.  I hate that they're being pushed into "homebirth is holy" and taking stupid risks, and it's really awful that sooner or later their faith really will be tested.  Ugh.  This cult is so evil.

Shades of Carrie Miele... (can't remember her full surname) with baby Beneniah. 

 

Edit: it was Mielewski. 

[Jaedzia]

29 minutes ago, VelociRapture said:

Out of curiosity, how did they know the shot didn't work for your sister? I'm RH negative as well and my daughter (second pregnancy and first live birth) is RH positive. I figure the Doctors would mention the shot not working?

 She had her babies back in the 80s and I had mine in the 90s. All three of her babies were positive. The first one was just fine and normal. I do not know when or how she found out the shot didn't work but it was sometime before the birth of my second niece and after she conceived. My guess is a blood test. She was warned by the doctors of problems with the RH factor during the second pregnancy. With the RH factor, the problems don't start until the second positive child. Her second girl was born two months early fighting for her life. Her third girl was born four months early stillborn. With the third girl they tried to do a transfusion of blood in the womb and it didn't work. She was told that each positive child would be worse than the child before it. She called it quits regardless that she wanted more and wanted a boy. I don't have a lot more details than that. I was 12 when my first niece was born and 17 when the third died. I wasn't involved as much as say, my mother. I also do not have a good relationship with my sister so I don't ask questions. 

 

[adidas]

1 hour ago, Carm_88 said:

I'm hoping that Jill just doesn't want a picture of her and the baby. I mean they could have posted one of just Samuel but maybe she wanted to be in it for the announcement and she wanted the picture to not be rushed this time? 

I agree. He is only a couple of hours old - if it was an emergency c-section she might still be totally out of it. 

[SummerRocks]

I'm not surprised to not see a picture yet. 

Also they are totally gonna try to conceive as soon as possible. Did you see how disappointed DD's mom was, when it was announced Sammy is a boy and not a girl. I also though Jill looked very disappointed. 

They are at least gonna keep having the sexy sexy till there is a baby girl if you ask me.