What's Going On in Maxhell? A Whole Lotta Nothing, Pt. 2

[Dandruff]

4 hours ago, nastyhobbitses said:

So in their latest post, they claim that the Lord provided them with a nice cabin in Colorado.

The Lord is my travel agent, I shall not book with Expedia.

Do they bring cleaning supplies to cabins, in the event they're not immaculate?  Would the Lord provide a cabin that wasn't immaculate?

[johnhugh]

On 23 June 2016 at 11:41 PM, mango_fandango said:

What was the name of that thread where someone photoshopped the Maxwell ladies' heads onto that image of girls in short shorts in front of the car bonnet? Dunno when it's from but it was a good photo 

Little Duck didn't post it...

[molecule]

2 hours ago, WonderingInWA said:

So, could someone translate this Christianese?  Does that mean they didn't have to pay anything for it?

It could mean several different things. It could mean that they didn't have to pay for it. It could also mean that the place they really wanted to stay (because of location, cost, previous experience, etc.) was available on exactly the nights they needed. Or, it might mean that they had exactly enough extra income to cover the stay. 

I've used the expression to mean all those things at different times. When you feel like you are living close to God and to God's will for you, it's hard not to see everything as provided by God.

"The Lord provided" sometimes just means that there is nothing preventing people from doing what they want to do. They just as easily could've said, "We had the money, and the place we wanted was available. Yay!"

[Elegant Mess]

3 hours ago, Fascinated said:

Someone please explain why the hell this needed to be prayed about?  The Lord must be tiring mightily of these people. I fear that one of these days, their prayers for cabins and trucks and the like are going to go unanswered.  

If what the Maxwells have said in prior posts is true regarding the inattention they pay to current events in the larger world, I'm not terribly surprised that a seemingly insignificant event (to us) would need praying over by them.  Unless you count the deaths of older relatives or broken courtships, the Maxwells have had no known significant earth-shattering events in their own immediate lives in recent years to put smaller things in perspective (inoperable tumor diagnosis, death by catastrophic accident, victim of violent crime, etc.).  Given their heavily-scheduled and insular lives, I could imagine that any deviation from the everyday routine would become the type of thing to pray over.

[Coconut Flan]

I translated it to be oh we're going in tourist season and by divine providence there was a vacancy. 

[nastyhobbitses]

2 hours ago, Dandruff said:

Do they bring cleaning supplies to cabins, in the event they're not immaculate?  Would the Lord provide a cabin that wasn't immaculate?

Is there a celestial Yelp to which they can complain? Lord, we do thank you for the cabin you have provided us, but seriously, 3 stars out of 10 because the baseboards were filthy and they took forever to get us fresh towels.

[uber frau]

If things weren't up to scratch,they'd simply interpret it as God testing them.  This is how fundies seem to see the world:

Fundies get good stuff (Blessing #13 makes safe arrival/enough spare change for a gallon of milk/Cruz wins a Primary)-God's blessing them.

Fundies get bad stuff(Pregnancy#13  results in 6.5 months of bedrest,a high risk delivery,a NICU for 3 months and a mountain of debt /piggy bank is a dime short for milk/Cruz pulls out of the race)-God's testing them.

Other ppl get bad stuff-God's punishing them.

Other ppl get good stuff-mostly neutral (although sometimes God sends good stuff to heathens just to test the faith of the Fundies.  The Fundie God is a bit of a Bastard.)

[nastyhobbitses]

7 hours ago, uber frau said:

If things weren't up to scratch,they'd simply interpret it as God testing them.  This is how fundies seem to see the world:

Fundies get good stuff (Blessing #13 makes safe arrival/enough spare change for a gallon of milk/Cruz wins a Primary)-God's blessing them.

Fundies get bad stuff(Pregnancy#13  results in 6.5 months of bedrest,a high risk delivery,a NICU for 3 months and a mountain of debt /piggy bank is a dime short for milk/Cruz pulls out of the race)-God's testing them.

Other ppl get bad stuff-God's punishing them.

Other ppl get good stuff-mostly neutral (although sometimes God sends good stuff to heathens just to test the faith of the Fundies.  The Fundie God is a bit of a Bastard.)

I mean, we are talking about a God who basically said "lo, I was just fucking with you" to Abraham after telling him to murder his own kid, completely ruined Job's life just for shits and giggles, gave Miriam leprosy as punishment for being kind of racist, and tried to kill Moses' son because Moses forgot to circumcise him. Old Testament God is really weird.

[fundiefan]

I'm still pissed that their god continues to make their decisions and provide for their vacations while, you know, war is happening around the world; starvation; disease; poverty; murder...need I go on?

They've always made me roll my eyes at their praying about stupid shit (everything) and the LORD providing (everything)...but right now, it's really on my last fucking nerve.

The LORD doesn't give a shit if you stay a few extra days in Colorado; the LORD doesn't give a shit what you name your child; the LORD doesn't give a shit whether Steve remembers to bring the pizza home on his own or is reminded by his wife-his fucking partner in life; the helpmeet the LORD gave Steve .

I must be having a really bad day because everything-everything-I'm reading today is sending me straight to insane cranky world.

[HereticHick]

On 6/22/2016 at 5:28 AM, WonderingInWA said:

They live in Iowa.  Obviously willing to move to the compound in Kansas is a pre-qualification for any kind of courtship, though.

The Bontragers live on a farm outside Kalona Iowa, which is in Eastern Iowa, near Iowa City. They  are very social & get tons of fundie visitors when they aren't on tour.  Chelsy, who writes most of the blog posts, often gushes about the "sweet" or "dear" friends that come to visit. The Maxwells didn't merit any such adjectives.  The Bontrager girls seem way too spunky to be sentenced to life in the Maxwell compound. Also, sometimes they wear jeans when out hiking! 

[sparkles]

46 minutes ago, fundiefan said:

I'm still pissed that their god continues to make their decisions and provide for their vacations while, you know, war is happening around the world; starvation; disease; poverty; murder...need I go on?

They've always made me roll my eyes at their praying about stupid shit (everything) and the LORD providing (everything)...but right now, it's really on my last fucking nerve.

The LORD doesn't give a shit if you stay a few extra days in Colorado; the LORD doesn't give a shit what you name your child; the LORD doesn't give a shit whether Steve remembers to bring the pizza home on his own or is reminded by his wife-his fucking partner in life; the helpmeet the LORD gave Steve .

I must be having a really bad day because everything-everything-I'm reading today is sending me straight to insane cranky world.

You're not the only one. All statements like this do is make me more and more convinced that god is one fucked up being if its priorities are so screwy. I was watching the news this morning and they were talking to some emotional puddle of a woman who flew out of Ataturk airport yesterday and therefore "escaped" the massacre. Of course, she took an earlier flight so she really escaped nothing but according to her that earlier flight was because god was watching over her. Well, aren't you special then. The 40+ people who were killed and the 200+ who were injured? Not so much. They were just fucked over by god, weren't they? I swear, it made me rage. Cell phone covers and Colorado cabins, that's what's important. Fuck you.

[fundiefan]

Same bullshit argument for all those who managed to not get blown up in 9/11. Truth be told, it was the 9/11 disaster that drove the nail in the religious coffin in my life because the multitude of stories about the people god 'saved' from being blown to bits for one reason or another just reinforced the selfishness of the god thing for me. By saying some god intentionally saved you, you are automatically saying that the same god intentionally killed those who died. You can't have it both ways; if you were saved by your god, they were destroyed by you god.

And, you know what? I am not ok with that. At all.

I think I read the same piece about the woman who was saved at Ataturk yesterday. Because she was special and everyone who died or was injured was clearly not good enough for any god to protect. Clearly, that god was all about that one special woman, AND all about those who carried out the attack; god was on their side, not the side of anyone else. Again, I am not ok with that.

[Eternalbluepearl]

8 minutes ago, sparkles said:

 Well, aren't you special then. The 40+ people who were killed and the 200+ who were injured? Not so much. They were just fucked over by god, weren't they? 

Of course they were just fucked over by God. Their loved ones will just have to remember that "everything happens for a reason" and "The Lord works in mysterious ways." Boom. All better.

[mango_fandango]

14 minutes ago, Eternalbluepearl said:

Of course they were just fucked over by God. Their loved ones will just have to remember that "everything happens for a reason" and "The Lord works in mysterious ways." Boom. All better.

GAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH THOSE PHRASES MAKE ME RAAAAAAAAGGGGGEEEEEE!!!!  

Theyre some of the shittiest things to say to a grieving person IMO.  

[Rosie]

1 hour ago, fundiefan said:

I'm still pissed that their god continues to make their decisions and provide for their vacations while, you know, war is happening around the world; starvation; disease; poverty; murder...need I go on?

They've always made me roll my eyes at their praying about stupid shit (everything) and the LORD providing (everything)...but right now, it's really on my last fucking nerve.

The LORD doesn't give a shit if you stay a few extra days in Colorado; the LORD doesn't give a shit what you name your child; the LORD doesn't give a shit whether Steve remembers to bring the pizza home on his own or is reminded by his wife-his fucking partner in life; the helpmeet the LORD gave Steve .

I must be having a really bad day because everything-everything-I'm reading today is sending me straight to insane cranky world.

I figure God has a spam filter.

[nokidsmom]

47 minutes ago, Rosie said:

I figure God has a spam filter.

I wonder how much actually makes it to the inbox?  

 

[Maggie Mae]

Someone asks Teri (in the comments) if she goes through a rental company or the cabin belongs to a friend. Teri, of course, doesn't say where she found this particular cabin, but that she has used VRBO successfully. So I guess God lists his extra properties on vrbo. I wonder what his rates are. 

[HereticHick]

3 hours ago, Maggie Mae said:

Someone asks Teri (in the comments) if she goes through a rental company or the cabin belongs to a friend. Teri, of course, doesn't say where she found this particular cabin, but that she has used VRBO successfully. So I guess God lists his extra properties on vrbo. I wonder what his rates are. 

Maybe God has special discount codes that are revealed to you when you pray hard enough?

[Granwych]

On ‎6‎/‎28‎/‎2016 at 4:21 AM, Melissa1977 said:

Are there more Maxwells expecting?

I am damn sure that they are trying like rabbits-----

[Dandruff]

So how do the Maxwells, from a spiritual standpoint, classify NR Anna's varicose veins during pregnancy?  Is it punishment?  A painful hint that she keeps not getting?  Have her legs somehow sinned against Him?

[Casserole]

I haven't been following the Maxwells as long as other fundie families, so anyone want to fill me in or point me in the direction of a link for why everyone always wishes Elissa has no more children? (other than the whole raising a child in the cult, thing) Did she have previous traumatic births? 

[nastyhobbitses]

7 hours ago, sparkles said:

You're not the only one. All statements like this do is make me more and more convinced that god is one fucked up being if its priorities are so screwy. I was watching the news this morning and they were talking to some emotional puddle of a woman who flew out of Ataturk airport yesterday and therefore "escaped" the massacre. Of course, she took an earlier flight so she really escaped nothing but according to her that earlier flight was because god was watching over her. Well, aren't you special then. The 40+ people who were killed and the 200+ who were injured? Not so much. They were just fucked over by god, weren't they? I swear, it made me rage. Cell phone covers and Colorado cabins, that's what's important. Fuck you.

In cases like the one you're mentioning, I totally understand the anger (why would God spare her and not the other people who were killed and maimed?), but I try to cut people a little slack if they're invoking God in the wake of a traumatic event (and no, "we want to go on vacation to Colorado and all the hotels are booked" is not a traumatic event). I remember watching one of those ER reality shows, and they had a girl who got hit by a truck, and because of where and how she was hit, they were incredibly worried that she had a spinal cord injury, and immobilized her for hours while they did every possible scan to make sure none of her vertebrae were out of whack. Turns out she was totally fine, besides some cuts and bruises. She said in her little post-recovery talking head that she was very grateful to the doctors, but also to God. Now, I did get a little of the "why would God spare you or save you and not the other people featured on this show?", but if you just got hit by a truck and then spent about 12 hours strapped to a backboard and completely immobilized in a neck collar while doctors wonder if you'll ever walk or move again, and then you're miraculously totally fine, you can thank Tom Hanks for giving you an astral body massage for all I care. You've been through some shit.

[fundiefan]

18 minutes ago, Casserole said:

I haven't been following the Maxwells as long as other fundie families, so anyone want to fill me in or point me in the direction of a link for why everyone always wishes Elissa has no more children? (other than the whole raising a child in the cult, thing) Did she have previous traumatic births? 

It's Melanie everyone says shouldn't have more kids, not Elissa. And, yes, she has a horrible maternal history. First daughter died after never being conscious; she's had troubled pregnancies all along and doesn't seem to conceive easily in the first place.

[Convicted Blossom]

This thread is what Free Jinger is all about, it's good to see the anger and reasoning against the dangers of fundie life. 

There are some totally fucked up people out there who think that if they say "God" or "Jesus" anything else they say doesn't matter. Frankly I think Steve Maxwell has gone beyond a joke, he is a very dangerous man. 

[donnal]

4 hours ago, Maggie Mae said:

Someone asks Teri (in the comments) if she goes through a rental company or the cabin belongs to a friend. Teri, of course, doesn't say where she found this particular cabin, but that she has used VRBO successfully. So I guess God lists his extra properties on vrbo. I wonder what his rates are. 

$99 from the looks of it. If that's the right house. Looks the same, but landscape is a bit different. I'm guessing that's just seasonal though.

I'm being a creeper now, someone take away my internet. Seriously, stalking the Maxwells is a new low.