What's Going On in Maxhell? A Whole Lotta Nothing, Pt. 2

[FundieFarmer]

Carrying on from here: 

Sassy name credit goes to @mango_fandango!

[mango_fandango]

WOOHOO! You used my name suggestion! 

Whoops. Too much enthusiasm for Maxhell. I better go read my Bible before dusting off my ceiling fans.

[SPHASH]

I wonder how old these young women from Snugars are.

[PartriarchydefyinValkarie]

4 hours ago, mango_fandango said:

WOOHOO! You used my name suggestion! 

Whoops. Too much enthusiasm for Maxhell. I better go read my Bible before dusting off my ceiling fans.

Don't forget to wear pants under that ugly AF denim skirt so no one is defrauded. 

Anyone womder if Maxhell has a 'quiet' room where they lock up anyone not following program? I just watched Kidnapped for Christ and it made me wonder what form of punishment Steve would carry out.

[mango_fandango]

"Since we don't know when the right guy will show up"

Damn that sounds so sad. Most girls/women are active in seeking out a guy- or, if they're not, they go out in public to places where it's likely, e.g. a bar, work, coffee shop, whatever. Heck, even the Duggars and Bateseseseseses are more proactive when it comes to meeting spouses. Zach met Whit at a fast food joint! Most women do not sit around at home sewing endless baby headbands. Newsflash: the right guy will not land on your doorstep. If they never go out, how do they expect to meet someone? A guy isn't going to walk past the Maxhell compound and go "Ooh there are some unmarried, Godly ladies in there!" They're not psychic.

As an aside, I will never ever understand headbands on babies, especially bald ones. I had no hair until I was about fifteen months old. Well, obviously I had sort of fine baby hair, but not proper hair for ages. Then, POOF! Hair! That was red! I'd've looked stupid in a headband. The whole damn point of them is to hold back hair. Fundies already dress their daughters in pink and in skirts. Why the headband? Although I do acknowledge that even non fundies do it. Why?

[FloraKitty35]

Next Ellie will have a headband too.  

[Dandruff]

Fortunately for the Maxwells, NR Anna is due to give birth next month and they will have something to post about.  I suppose it will be the usual formula:  SILs help out as the due date approaches, they tell us she's in labor, a blue or pink square is displayed, they announce the name, couple pictures of parents and baby, reaction of family members, then the Maxwell newborn photo shoot.  Did I miss anything?

I predict Anna will be out of bed within two hours of the birth, probably cooking dinner. 

[Fascinated]

This is awesome. A new thread!  I've been keeping up with the absolutely fascinating blog entries, with thanks to those Google card thingies.  So I've seen the headbands. I've seen the completely riveting updates to the life that is Sarah Maxwell.  I can't think of anything else to say. The Maxwells are just the most interesting people who ever blogged, yes?  

[Granwych]

I used to put small headbands on dd once in awhile, not those cabbage roses so prevalent on poor fundie baby girls(how on earth could they hold their heads up??).  When her hair came in, I went shopping for bows, saw what godawful prices they went for, and made my own.  And in dd's 1 year old portrait, she had on a gold baby bracelet.  The only Maxwell female I've ever seen with jewelry on other than wedding/engagement rings was Melanie, and she had on small pearl earrings on her wedding day.

Ellie could have small bows clipped over her ears like my poodles used to wear---

[mango_fandango]

@FloraKitty35 someone actually suggested that in the comments. 

[Snarfblatt]

Quote

Young ladies have a special challenge in that most desire to be married, but life can’t be “on hold” until then. 

Yes that's why some of us have careers and don't live with our parents...

The people being the Snugars seem to be doing okay for themselves. Can anyone find out anything about who the family running it is? 

[uber frau]

The business is owned by the Leake family who also own Garlands of Grace and Shiloh photography (&a few other etsy sort of operations). I think they're one of the Fundie families that manages to make a passable income in the overcrowded market.  They are better at marketing than most of the other cottage industries.

Rachel's blog (Shiloh Photography) is a fairly good place to start.

[SolomonFundy]

The headbands are bulky, cliched, and kind of ridiculous, but it could be worse. My long-suffering cousin Jennifer spent the first 5 years of her life with a head as smooth as ice. Her mother made her bonnets for every occasion, and poor Jennifer had to wear them at all times. They ranged from extremely infantile "layette" style bonnets with wispy ribbon and lace, to Little House on the Prairie inspired, to original designs. 

They were usually made of novelty-printed polyester, but there were some basic colors too. She even had a denim one... to wear with jeans. (1970's backwoods NC.) Bonnets are cute on tiny babies and maybe toddlers, but it's weird to see a lanky school-aged child, running around on a soccer field,  wearing a baby bonnet with their vest and bell-bottoms. The family photos from those years are a goldmine.

Mercifully, Jennifer's hair started growing around her 6th birthday.

[FloraKitty35]

8 hours ago, Dandruff said:

Fortunately for the Maxwells, NR Anna is due to give birth next month and they will have something to post about.  I suppose it will be the usual formula:  SILs help out as the due date approaches, they tell us she's in labor, a blue or pink square is displayed, they announce the name, couple pictures of parents and baby, reaction of family members, then the Maxwell newborn photo shoot.  Did I miss anything?

I predict Anna will be out of bed within two hours of the birth, probably cooking dinner. 

Heaven forbid that Christopher had fix or heat up any food for himself or his children.  

[Jana814]

2 hours ago, FloraKitty35 said:

Heaven forbid that Christopher had fix or heat up any food for himself or his children.  

Christopher is like Steve. Steve wouldn't heat up food so neither will Christopher. 

[Granwych]

2 hours ago, FloraKitty35 said:

Heaven forbid that Christopher had fix or heat up any food for himself or his children.  

Especially if the kids refused to eat the stuff.  Then Daddy would have to beat them.

[Kitcae]

14 hours ago, SPHASH said:

I wonder how old these young women from Snugars are.

Micah is 29

Rachel is 26

Grace is 21

Lydia is 20

Ruth is 14

 

[Coconut Flan]

I think Steve would use a microwave rather than starve.  He's all about working on the bean burrito mash. 

[mango_fandango]

Sarah's always loved cute headbands on babies, presumably as opposed to ugly ones. Newsflash: they're all ugly.

And woah @SolomonFundy at your cousin not growing hair for five years. Poor kid.

[socalrules]

When do we get a post about mass burrito making so that Anna doesn't have to cook every meal right after the baby is born?

Isn't it also time for another fast? How will thI heathens of the world be saved if Steve doesn't fast more often?

I am sure we will get one for Father's Day where we hear about how lucky the kids are to have such a Godly father that has protected them from relationships, education and independent thought.

 

[polandspring]

14 hours ago, uber frau said:

The business is owned by the Leake family who also own Garlands of Grace and Shiloh photography (&a few other etsy sort of operations). I think they're one of the Fundie families that manages to make a passable income in the overcrowded market.  They are better at marketing than most of the other cottage industries.

Rachel's blog (Shiloh Photography) is a fairly good place to start.

I had no idea Garlands of Grace was owned by someone discussed on here.  I think their stuff is gorgeous and I've bought a few items from them in the past.

[anjulibai]

1 hour ago, socalrules said:

When do we get a post about mass burrito making so that Anna doesn't have to cook every meal right after the baby is born?

Isn't it also time for another fast? How will thI heathens of the world be saved if Steve doesn't fast more often?

I am sure we will get one for Father's Day where we hear about how lucky the kids are to have such a Godly father that has protected them from relationships, education and independent thought.

 

We already got one. Anna or Mary went over to help NR Anna make them. 

NR Anna puts beef in her burritos, even though Steve discovered years ago they don't taste any different. NR Anna is a rebel apparently. 

[Black Aliss]

4 hours ago, anjulibai said:

NR Anna puts beef in her burritos, even though Steve discovered years ago they don't taste any different. NR Anna is a rebel apparently. 

Can we just pretend it's Christopher, asserting his independence from Steve, who wants beef in the burritos?

[DrPusey]

On 6/10/2016 at 10:06 PM, Dandruff said:

Fortunately for the Maxwells, NR Anna is due to give birth next month and they will have something to post about.  I suppose it will be the usual formula:  SILs help out as the due date approaches, they tell us she's in labor, a blue or pink square is displayed, they announce the name, couple pictures of parents and baby, reaction of family members, then the Maxwell newborn photo shoot.  Did I miss anything?

I predict Anna will be out of bed within two hours of the birth, probably cooking dinner. 

The new thing with the infant photo shoots seems to be to wrap them up in gauze so they look like caterpillars with human heads.

[RoseWilder]

1 hour ago, DrPusey said:

The new thing with the infant photo shoots seems to be to wrap them up in gauze so they look like caterpillars with human heads.

In every newborn photo shoot I've ever seen, the baby looks dead in most of the pictures. It's so creepy.