Enemas for the submissive wife

[formergothardite]

I think Ken is in deep denial about Lori's capabilities. I would feel sorry for her but she is so wretched that I have a hard time mustering up any sympathy.

[Rebelwife]

I've had multiple surgeries, including uterine (so like realllly close to the bowel) and thankfully have never had to take any laxatives or more!

I wonder what sort of surgery, apart from something in / up "that" area, would require you to be empty. After 12 hours of not eating, I'd assume there wouldn't be much moving down the chute.

I recently had to have surgery for adhesions that were right up against the bowel. I didn't have to do an enema, but I did get to do the lovely colonoscopy prep. Trust me, I would have rather had the enema. (Fun fact: I had to have a real colonoscopy two weeks before so I got to do the prep twice in two weeks! )

[Marianne]

I've a friend who is very very very in the kink/BDSM and he just can stop laughing since he have read it. He say that if Jésus have enjoined to spank and make enemas, he wants to be a christian right now.

[chaotic life]

Golighty is anything but.

[ViolaSebastian]

Golighty is anything but.

I always thought 'Golightly' was a bizarre legacy for Truman Capote.

[salex]

I would be willing to bet that was actually written by someone with a fetish who was typing one handed.

Probably copied from the same old copy of Penthouse Variations as SSM's spanking scene. The whole crew of them are purposely or accidently catering to the same audience---which, when I sincerely suggested this in my first post on Lori's blog a year ago, got me blocked. This and other indicators tell me they know this is their primary or secondary audience....

:nanner-sex:

[latraviata]

I totally believe she approved it and Ken deleted

Yes, poor Lori she just discovered another possibility to submit, especially with her lifetime supply of lube.....

[halfheartedheroine]

Golighty is anything but.

I think it was Dave Barry that said that someone suggested reconstituting the colonoscopy prep with vodka? To paraphrase, it sounds like a good idea taste/entertainment-wise, but what if you fall over while in "full Fire Hose Mode"? It never fails to make me giggle when I have to do the preps :)

[smittykins]

Probably copied from the same old copy of Penthouse Variations as SSM's spanking scene. The whole crew of them are purposely or accidently catering to the same audience---which, when I sincerely suggested this in my first post on Lori's blog a year ago, got me blocked. This and other indicators tell me they know this is their primary or secondary audience....

:nanner-sex:

All they would've needed to add is "I never thought this would happen to me, but..." :lol:

ETA: I AM The Sin in the Camp now! W00T! :dance:

[FloraKitty35]

:ew: :ew: Lori is into anal. :ew: :ew:

[moreorlessnu]

I really want to know what a butt plug is but I am afraid to google it because I don't want it showing up in the paid advertisement feeds on my facebook page.

[ViolaSebastian]

I really want to know what a butt plug is but I am afraid to google it because I don't want it showing up in the paid advertisement feeds on my facebook page.

It's a plug. For the butt.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Butt_plug

[Curious]

Probably copied from the same old copy of Penthouse Variations as SSM's spanking scene. The whole crew of them are purposely or accidently catering to the same audience---which, when I sincerely suggested this in my first post on Lori's blog a year ago, got me blocked. This and other indicators tell me they know this is their primary or secondary audience....

:nanner-sex:

This intrigued me, so I went to see if I could see what keywords are driving traffic to her blog. Unfortunately, they have made it a "pro" feature if you want to see more than about 5 keywords, so it was not very enlightening. Black salve is a popular key word for her site though :?

I did notice that her bounce rate is around 80% which is quite high. I think the internet average is somewhere around 60%. For comparison, our bounce rate is 14.80%. Bounce rate is the % of people that land on the page and then leave (ie: a single page view).

[ViolaSebastian]

I find that stat very encouraging. It tells me that 80% of people that search on her topics read one essay and say 'oh fuck no!' and click the back button ASAP.

[salex]

This intrigued me, so I went to see if I could see what keywords are driving traffic to her blog. Unfortunately, they have made it a "pro" feature if you want to see more than about 5 keywords, so it was not very enlightening. Black salve is a popular key word for her site though :?

I did notice that her bounce rate is around 80% which is quite high. I think the internet average is somewhere around 60%. For comparison, our bounce rate is 14.80%. Bounce rate is the % of people that land on the page and then leave (ie: a single page view).

That is very high. Clearly she lacks google magic. :google-tactics:

[Phoebe]

Golighty is anything but.

More like "anything butt," am I right? :lol:

[Howl]

I think it was Dave Barry that said that someone suggested reconstituting the colonoscopy prep with vodka? To paraphrase, it sounds like a good idea taste/entertainment-wise, but what if you fall over while in "full Fire Hose Mode"? It never fails to make me giggle when I have to do the preps :)

I love Dave Barry. Here is his colonoscopy report in full:

I called my friend, a gastroenterologist, to make an appointment for a colonoscopy. A few days later, in his office, he showed me a color diagram of the Colon, a lengthy organ that appears to go all over the place, at one point passing briefly through Manchester. Then he explained the colonoscopy procedure to me in a thorough, reassuring and patient manner. I nodded thoughtfully, but I didn't really hear anything he said, because my Brain was shrieking, 'HE'S GOING TO STICK A TUBE 17,000 FEET UP YOUR A**E!'

I left his office with some written instructions, and a prescription for a product called 'MoviPrep,' which comes in a box large enough to hold a Microwave oven. I will discuss MoviPrep in detail later; for now suffice it to say that we must never allow it to fall into the hands of our enemies.

I spent the next several days productively sitting around being nervous. Then, on the day before my colonoscopy, I began my preparation. In accordance with my instructions, I didn't eat any solid food that day; All I had was chicken broth, which is basically water, only with less flavour. Then, in the evening , I took the MoviPrep. You mix two packets of powder together in a one-litre plastic jug, then you fill it with lukewarm water..(For those unfamiliar with the metric system, a litre is about 32 gallons).

Then you have to drink the whole jug. This takes about an hour, because MoviPrep tastes - and here I am being kind - like a mixture of goat spit and urinal cleanser, with just a hint of lemon. The instructions for MoviPrep, clearly written by somebody with a great sense of humor, state that after you drink it, 'a loose, watery bowel movement may result'. This is kind of like saying that after you jump off your roof, you may experience contact with the ground. MoviPrep is a nuclear laxative. I don't want to be too graphic, here, but:

Have you ever seen a space-shuttle launch? This is pretty much the MoviPrep Experience, with you as the shuttle. There are times when you wish the commode had a seat belt.. You spend several hours pretty much confined to the bathroom, spurting violently. You eliminate everything. And then, when you figure you must be totally empty, you have to drink another litre of MoviPrep, at which point, as far as I can tell, your bowels travel into the future and start eliminating food that you have not even eaten yet.

After an action-packed evening, I finally got to sleep. The next morning my wife drove me to the clinic. I was very nervous. Not only was I worried about the procedure, but I had been experiencing occasional return bouts of MoviPrep spurtage. I was thinking, 'What if I Spurt on the doctor?' How do you apologize to a friend for something like that? Flowers would not be enough.

At the clinic I had to sign many forms acknowledging that I understood and totally agreed with whatever the hell the forms said. Then they led me to a room full of other colonoscopy people, where I went inside a little curtained space and took off my clothes and put on one of those hospital garments designed by sadistic perverts; the kind that, when you put it on, makes you feel even more naked than when you are actually naked. Then a nurse named Helga put a little needle in a vein in my left hand.

Ordinarily I would have fainted, but Helga was very good, and I was already lying down. Helga also told me that some people put vodka in their MoviPrep...At first I was ticked off that I hadn't thought of this, but then I pondered what would happen if you got yourself too tipsy to make it to the bathroom, so you were staggering around in full Fire Hose Mode. You would have no choice but to burn your house.

When everything was ready, she wheeled me into the procedure room, where the Doc was waiting with a nurse and an anesthesiologist. I did not see the 17,000-foot tube, but I knew he had it hidden around there somewhere. I was seriously nervous at this point. He had me roll over on my left side, and the anesthesiologist began hooking something up to the needle in my hand.

There was music playing in the room, and I realized that the song was 'Dancing Queen' by ABBA. I remarked to the Doctor that, of all the songs that could be playing during this particular procedure, 'Dancing Queen' had to be the least appropriate. 'You want me to turn it up?' he said, from somewhere behind me.

'Ha ha,' I said. And then it was time; the moment I had been dreading for more than a decade. If you are squeamish, prepare yourself, because I am going to tell you, in explicit detail, exactly what it was like.

I have no idea! Really! I slept through it! One moment, ABBA was yelling, 'Dancing Queen, feel the beat of the tambourine,' and the next moment, I was back in the other room, waking up in a very mellow mood.

******************************************************************************

Like I said, I LOVE Dave Barry, & his humor actually does help remove any mental images of various forms of Christian anal discipline. Sweet Jesus, somebody get my fan and help me to my fainting couch.

[chaotic life]

He's British, right? The Moviprep, that's what we call Golightly in the US.

My son once had a bowel obstruction and given that he didn't have enough gut for us to do surgery and he still be able to survive at all, we tried to bust it out first. Poor kid had 3 gallons of Golightly in his g-tube before his butt finally started exploding and allowed us to avoid surgery.

[Howl]

He's British, right? The Moviprep, that's what we call Golightly in the US.

My son once had a bowel obstruction and given that he didn't have enough gut for us to do surgery and he still be able to survive at all, we tried to bust it out first. Poor kid had 3 gallons of Golightly in his g-tube before his butt finally started exploding and allowed us to avoid surgery.

Dave Barry? No, he's a US humor writer/columnist, who used to write a column for the Miami Herald.

Glad everything came out OK for your son. ;)

[AllisonWndrland]

He's British, right? The Moviprep, that's what we call Golightly in the US.

My son once had a bowel obstruction and given that he didn't have enough gut for us to do surgery and he still be able to survive at all, we tried to bust it out first. Poor kid had 3 gallons of Golightly in his g-tube before his butt finally started exploding and allowed us to avoid surgery.

It's called MoviPrep here, too. They should just call it Vile Shit of Which You Have to Drink 8000 Gallons. His description is spot on. That stuff tastes just awful. I cheated during my second colonoscopy after I tried to drink the MoviPrep. Couldn't do it. Mixed Sprite and Miralax, which was what I had to do with my first colonoscopy. Worked just fine and I didn't have to finish drinking that vile liquid.

On topic, I had a fantastic laugh over that comment. Then I began to wonder exactly how much Lori's health issues are affecting her mental abilities, much as some other posters have done.

[chaotic life]

I still don't see how enemas are a cool sex game even for Dom/sub games. Unless you are turned on by the shit, most of those games are gonna really have a gross end point that does far more than humiliate the sub.

[Hane]

I still don't see how enemas are a cool sex game even for Dom/sub games. Unless you are turned on by the shit, most of those games are gonna really have a gross end point that does far more than humiliate the sub.

I feel the same way. Plus, they cause horrific abdominal cramping, which is about the LEAST erotic sensation I can imagine.

[nomoxian]

I recently had to have surgery for adhesions that were right up against the bowel. I didn't have to do an enema, but I did get to do the lovely colonoscopy prep. Trust me, I would have rather had the enema. (Fun fact: I had to have a real colonoscopy two weeks before so I got to do the prep twice in two weeks! )

Hope you're feeling better :) That sounds like the opposite of fun ...or, something Steve would like (You're welcome for any grotesque mental images!)

[Rebelwife]

Hope you're feeling better :) That sounds like the opposite of fun ...or, something Steve would like (You're welcome for any grotesque mental images!)

:brain-bleach: Especially because they do everything as a family.