We're Always Learning New Things with Ken Alexander: Part 2

[AllisonWndrland]

Cabinetman's comment on the newest blog post is typical. Men only want to be the protector when their women are "sweet" and "tender." It's a typical excuse used by an abusive man to justify his actions ("But she wasn't acting right, so I had to deal with her behavior!"). It's nearly textbook to the things I have heard batterers say about their abuse toward their wives and girlfriends. Cowardly, yes? I can probably type up what Ken's response to this would be, but I don't know that I could add extraneous apostrophes or leave typos. ;)

Too bad Ken and Lori are all about ignoring the real problems the posters in this forum have with the blog. Her most recent blog posts prove they learned nothing from Ken's little dalliance as a Freejinger member.

Her comment in response to Paula on "Duck, Ladies!" post seriously had me eye-rolling. Apparently Lori is unable to control her behavior when someone posts something against her teachings. :naughty:

[OkToBeTakei]

Ken and his typical use off derogatory language. Nagging, nagging nagging.

Ken. I KNOW! You did it for weeks here!!!! So annoying :lol:

[salex]

You are all just tougher than I am... I can't go to their site on a day to day basis to read the crap (or should we say manure) they promote and write. Creepy, nasty, frustrated people...

[Koala]

You are all just tougher than I am... I can't go to their site on a day to day basis to read the crap (or should we say manure) they promote and write. Creepy, nasty, frustrated people...

I like to call them "difficult" :P

[SunnyAndrsn]

Cabinetman's comment on the newest blog post is typical. Men only want to be the protector when their women are "sweet" and "tender." It's a typical excuse used by an abusive man to justify his actions ("But she wasn't acting right, so I had to deal with her behavior!"). It's nearly textbook to the things I have heard batterers say about their abuse toward their wives and girlfriends. Cowardly, yes? I can probably type up what Ken's response to this would be, but I don't know that I could add extraneous apostrophes or leave typos. ;)

Too bad Ken and Lori are all about ignoring the real problems the posters in this forum have with the blog. Her most recent blog posts prove they learned nothing from Ken's little dalliance as a Freejinger member.

Her comment in response to Paula on "Duck, Ladies!" post seriously had me eye-rolling. Apparently Lori is unable to control her behavior when someone posts something against her teachings. :naughty:

Yup, but women are supposed to be submissive all the time. Doesn't matter if he's being a good protector or not. Just put up and shut up, and make sure your sweet and tender so you get that protection.

[formergothardite]

Cabinetman's comment on the newest blog post is typical. Men only want to be the protector when their women are "sweet" and "tender." It's a typical excuse used by an abusive man to justify his actions ("But she wasn't acting right, so I had to deal with her behavior!"). It's nearly textbook to the things I have heard batterers say about their abuse toward their wives and girlfriends. Cowardly, yes? I can probably type up what Ken's response to this would be, but I don't know that I could add extraneous apostrophes or leave typos. ;)

Too bad Ken and Lori are all about ignoring the real problems the posters in this forum have with the blog. Her most recent blog posts prove they learned nothing from Ken's little dalliance as a Freejinger member.

Her comment in response to Paula on "Duck, Ladies!" post seriously had me eye-rolling. Apparently Lori is unable to control her behavior when someone posts something against her teachings. :naughty:

Did she delelte Paula's comment? I didn't see it.

Cabinet Man creeps me out. He is disturbed.

[Koala]

Yup, but women are supposed to be submissive all the time. Doesn't matter if he's being a good protector or not. Just put up and shut up, and make sure your sweet and tender so you get that protection.

He's also the one that likes to see his wife cry- something I am sure their has been no shortage of in light of the way he treats her. Bastard

[AllisonWndrland]

Yup, but women are supposed to be submissive all the time. Doesn't matter if he's being a good protector or not. Just put up and shut up, and make sure your sweet and tender so you get that protection.

Isn't it just mind-boggling that Ken honestly doesn't seem to understand why the bolded is abuse? Simply reading the sentence should indicate something is amiss. Also, perhaps Cabinetman and Ken should stay silent on the blog. Don't women go to Lori's blog to be mentored by an older, wiser woman, not someone else's husband??? How is it godly or Christian for them to comment on her blog (pretty sure someone else brought this up previously....)? The day I tell my husband I am going to live according to Cabinetman's or Ken's rules is the day he takes me for a psych eval.

Just checked for Paula's comment again. I had both posts open and Paula's comment with Lori's response is on the Saying Nothing to Offend Others post from yesterday. I was thinking it was on the cat photo post. It's still there, FG.

[VooDooChild]

In the 20+ years I was a christian, I never got a valid explanation as to what my lowly wimmin's self needed protection from. Does anybody have an answer for this profession that women need to be protected?

[Hisey]

Exactly! This is my question, too. Lori lives in an upper-middle class suburb, and seems to spend most of her time at home. What does she need all this protection from? When I press this issue, I hear vague statements about intruders (so buy a gun) and bugs (so hire an exterminator or kill it yourself or let it be). SSM once spoke about her divorced mother needing her front porch steps replaced and lacking the physcial strength to do it herself (hire someone).

In any event, this "protection" comes at a very high cost--complete submission and submersion of one's personality.

[formergothardite]

If the only way you can be nice to your wife is if she pretends to be helpless and she always submits to what you want then you are an asshole. I dont' believe in God, but if I did I wouldn't want to believe in a God who encourages this sort of behavior.

[EmiGirl]

Exactly! This is my question, too. Lori lives in an upper-middle class suburb, and seems to spend most of her time at home. What does she need all this protection from? When I press this issue, I hear vague statements about intruders (so buy a gun) and bugs (so hire an exterminator or kill it yourself or let it be). SSM once spoke about her divorced mother needing her front porch steps replaced and lacking the physcial strength to do it herself (hire someone).

In any event, this "protection" comes at a very high cost--complete submission and submersion of one's personality.

She needs Ken to "protect" her from sites like FJ who question her by not allowing her to come here.

[polecat]

Exactly! This is my question, too. Lori lives in an upper-middle class suburb, and seems to spend most of her time at home. What does she need all this protection from?

Upper middle class fundie women need protection from their husbands in some cases.

www.pjstar.com/x1037520145/Police-arres ... Road?img=2

[RachelB]

She needs Ken to "protect" her from sites like FJ who question her by not allowing her to come here.

Ah, but who will protect Ken from the wicked wiles of FJ? Clearly he can't do it himself.

[EmiGirl]

Ah, but who will protect Ken from the wicked wiles of FJ? Clearly he can't do it himself.

Of course he can! He didn't need protecting. We're just silly little women whose brains couldn't handle the man-logic he was using.

[Boogalou]

I think Boogalou needs to add this one to our dictionary :)

Done!

Kensplain: mansplaining courtesy of Ken Alexander during his visit here in early 2014 to defend his wife's blog.

[EmiGirl]

Maybe the next Fundie Friday needs to feature Cabinetman!!!

[SunnyAndrsn]

Maybe the next Fundie Friday needs to feature Cabinetman!!!

K...I'll 'fess up. Lori did a whole post on my comment on her blog. Cabinetman replied to me to try and put me in my place.

Basically, I said my work was my calling and to not follow my calling would have been disobedient. I added that the expression "keeper at home" was horrible, because I think it is. Lucky for me Cabinetman was there to tell me how wrong I was, although my situation is unique. Lori's leg humpers were available to agree with her that "keeper at home" is a righteous expression.

lorialexander.blogspot.com/2014/03/keeper-at-home-horrible-expression.html

Yet Ken says he doesn't get anything positive out of Free Jinger. Looks like they've found plenty of blog fodder. Whatever would they do without us?

[RosyDaisy]

I freely admit to being hostile towards Ken. He is deliberately trying to shut us up and submit. He's not interested in answering our questions. I have zero tolerance towards patriarchal assholes like that, and I refuse to treat him with kid gloves. He doesn't deserve it.

[cindyluvs24]

Maybe our husbands and SO's can post and explain to Ken why most men do not want to @#$%, much less marry someone who is so desperate for a man they'll put up with that doormat crap. Unfortunately in my house, today is opening day for the Mets and the Yankees.

[polecat]

I freely admit to being hostile towards Ken. He is deliberately trying to shut us up and submit. He's not interested in answering our questions. I have zero tolerance towards patriarchal assholes like that, and I refuse to treat him with kid gloves. He doesn't deserve it.

Which doesn't even make sense according to his (questionable) logic since according to him, wives should submit to their husbands. Not to random penis-people online.

[proverbial1]

Lori said: Submission is ducking so God can hit your husband! This is a cute illustration that shows perfectly how powerful and easy submission truly can be.

ducking - the act or a means of getting or keeping away from something undesirable

According to this quote submission is ducking (getting or keeping out the way) so God can hit your husband! This statement really isn't comforting, encouraging or reassuring. A husband and wife are one - a team. Therefore, whatever hits (affects) a husband also hits the wife and vice versa. In a marital relationship it's almost impossible for one spouse to be "hit" without it having some direct or indirect effect on the other spouse. This illustration might seem pithy to some, but it's really not.

Men are made to fight or flight.

The fight or flight response is a human response. It is not gender specific. Why imply that it is?

No man has ever crawled out from under his wife's criticism to become a better man, as Debi Pearl so eloquently states When you lovingly accept your man the way that he is, God can convict and change him.

1). What does this mean? So, if your husband is let's say a child molester, a wife should accept her man the way that he is so God can convict and change him. Just wondering. Child molester came to mind because that's evidently what Dottie Sandusky did. She just accepted her man the way he was. Evidently, that philosophy didn't do Dottie or Jerry any good. BTW, God did eventually "hit" Jerry with jail time. However, although Dottie "accepted him the way he is" she has also been "hit" as a result. Just pondering how Lori's advice and illustrations hold up to real life events.

2). What I gather from Lori's writing is that it's not okay for a wife to constructively criticize her husband because Lori doesn't understand or acknowledge the difference between destructive and constructive criticism. While it's not okay for wives to criticize their husbands, it's okay for Lori to criticize so called feminists.

I also gather from her writing, that it's not okay for a wife to criticize her husband, but it's perfectly okay for a husband to criticize his wife. When a husband criticizes his wife, it's part of the way he leads. Lori and Debi Pearl's sentiments here are not Biblical.

There is a difference between destructive and constructive criticism. All criticism is not destructive or bad. The Bible actually teaches the value of constructive criticism, but you wouldn't know that from Lori's writing.

I would like to show the difference between what Lori/Debi teach vs. what the Bible teaches:

Proverbs 13:18 NLT - If you ignore criticism, you will end in poverty and disgrace; if you accept criticism, you will be honored.

Pr 15:31 NLT - If you listen to constructive criticism, you will be at home among the wise.

Pr 15:32 NLT - If you reject criticism, you only harm yourself; but if you listen to correction, you grow in understanding.

Pr 25:12 NLT - Valid criticism is as treasured by the one who heeds it as jewelry made from finest gold.

Pr 29:1 NLT - Whoever stubbornly refuses to accept criticism will suddenly be broken beyond repair.

Pr 27:5 GWT- Open criticism is better than unexpressed love.

Do these passages sound anything like what Lori and Debi advise? No wonder Lori doesn't support many of her blanket statements with an actual Bible verse. Lori/Debi state, "No man has ever crawled out from under his wife's criticism to become a better man." According to King Solomon who actually wrote and/or collected Proverbs, constructive criticism can help a person "grow in understanding." Of course, Lori/Debi omit that. I find it very disconcerting that Lori writes a Christian post on criticism, yet she doesn't take a detailed look at what the Bible actually has to say about the subject. Instead, she and Debi just fabricate their own illustrations and stats and share them with others. SMH...

We wonder why so few men want to marry women these days.

Again, where does she get her stats? On average, according to many recent studies, men and women are both delaying marriage - not just men. On average, many women are either delaying marriage or opting to not do it at all.

http://abcnews.go.com/WNT/story?id=130884

What feminism teaches is polar opposite of what God's word teaches. Be strong! Be independent! Fight for your rights. It has caused havoc between the sexes, destroyed families, and led to the slaughtering of millions of unborn babies.

As usual, she is blaming something "abortion" on women and feminism. However, she totally omits the fact that many women are forced into having abortions by the men in their lives.

In a national study, women gave reasons for having abortions:

Forced by mother

Father opposed [of the pregnancy]

Husband or boyfriend persuaded me

No other option given

Would have been kicked out

Loss of family's support

Lack of support from society

Clinic persuaded me

In 95% of all cases, the male partner plays a central role in the decision. Of men interviewed at abortion clinics 45% recalled urging abortion, including 37% of married men. Many of these men reported being justified in being the primary decision maker in the decision to have the abortion.

http://www.publiceye.org/ark/reproducti ... merica.php

However, Lori leaves those stats out and blames it all on feminism. Let's not miss the part about the men feeling justified in being the primary decision maker in the decision to have the abortion. Well, according to people with Lori's mindset, the husband is and should be the primary decision maker and tie breaker in the family.

[RosyDaisy]

The greatest evangelical tool IS showing the love of of Christ by helping people in need and show in that you care about and love them. Actions speak louder than words. This is especially true when it comes to evangelizing. Bible thumping and hellfire and damnation preaching is not evangelizing.

[J'ean Skirt]

Which doesn't even make sense according to his (questionable) logic since according to him, wives should submit to their husbands. Not to random penis-people online.

Yeah, at one point I said he was expecting me to submit and I wasn't going to. He responded I should be submitting to no man except my husband.

:wtf:

[Curious]

She needs Ken to "protect" her from sites like FJ who question her by not allowing her to come here.

Just to be clear here, it's KEN who does not allow her to come here. We allow anyone we follow to come here, as long as they follow our rules.

For example, Nate Lawrenson (I hope I have that last name correct) came here and created several socks, which we easily found. In his case, we didn't ban him, but rather put him in the Prayer Closet, so he could still respond.

Ken likes to keep framing things as though he is getting some kind of special consideration by being allowed to post here, but that isn't the case.

I'm just clearing this up for people coming here reading the thread since Ken seems to believe that the more times you say something it will become reality ;)